Jon read through his stack of adoption forms as Shawn continued to sleep
the day away. Jon felt so sorry for the boy, every time he seems to doze
off someone comes in and rouses him. Just this morning alone, he endured
two blood tests, a breathing treatment, and had his bandages changed twice,
and it was only approaching three in the afternoon.
Jon was so caught up in the forms, he barely noticed George Feeny sneak into the room. "Greetings!!" He whispered, trying hard not to disturb Shawn. Jon glanced up and smiled as George placed his things onto the rolling table at the foot of the bed. George peered over and studied the teen, while removing his heavy gloves, "He looks good, how's he doing?" Jon stretched and rose to greet George, "He's doing okay, he's in a lot of pain, but every time it gets out of hand, they dope him up pretty good.. It's going to take time. He hasn't really said too much yet, his throat is pretty sore, so he's not real talkative. After a few words he gets real winded. All he wanted to do today was brush his teeth, when he finished that he slept for two hours, he's pretty weak."
George and Jon shared a giggle while Feeny unpacked some items from his canvas bag, "I figured his throat would be tender so I brought him this." George pulled out a pint of chocolate water ice and placed it on the table. "I also knew you wouldn't be moving from that seat, so I brought you this." Feeny produced a double Philly Cheese steak and tossed it over to Jon. "George, you are a god among men!!" Turner unwrapped the sandwich and dug in gleefully. Nurse Bev strolled through the door, her usual cheerful self. "OOOHHHH WATER ICE!!! They musta thought you were crazy buying that in a blizzard!!" George chuckled, "They did!! Is it okay if he has this??" George queried, Nurse Bev shook her head and smiled, "Only if I can have some too." George leaned onto the bed rail, "Your more than welcome."
Nurse Beverly approached Shawn and took his vitals, like clockwork. While she was cleaning the lines on his IV, she accidentally woke him again. "Sorry sweetie, it's my job!!" Shawn rubbed his tired eyes, with his free hand. Moments later Beverly returned his left arm, after she was finished. Beverly leaned over and brushed some stray bangs out of the boy's eyes, as she removed the plastic mask from his face. "Thank God!!" Shawn silently mouthed as he scratched his nose. "Not so fast junior, were not finished." She replaced the mask with a more comfortable oxygen cannula, which fit just under Shawn's nose. The boy fiddled with the tube as Beverly crossed her arms, "Don't touch, hospital property, you break it, you buy it." Shawn smiled as he fidgeted to try to sit up. Jon reached in and raised the back of Shawn's bed, stopping just shy of a sitting position, as Beverly shot him the thumbs up. "There, now your ready for water ice." She stated as she placed the pint on his table. "Compliments of Mr. Feeny." Shawn's eyes lit up as he rubbed his sore throat.
"I'll be back in a jiffy with some cups and spoons, water ice party in Shawn's room." She joked as he hurried out into the hall. George, rose and dug deeper into his satchel, pulling out two large piles of cards and letters, "These are just some of the well wishes from your fellow students, it seems your quite popular in the halls of John Adams, we make a daily announcement during homeroom regarding your progress."
Mr. Feeny smiled as he handed Shawn the cards, Shawn caught his sleeve and tugged for him to move a bit closer. George leaned in and looked him in the eye. "I..just..wan. wanted to..say..Thanks!!" Shawn breathlessly whispered. The older man patted his arm, "Think nothing of it Mr. Hunter. Just know one thing...Don't ever run away from me...Run toward me. You should know by now, I would never hurt you." George firmly grasped his hand. Shawn closed his eyes and nodded, trying to catch his breath. George pulled up a chair and settled, as the phone rang on the side table. Instinctively, Shawn reached for the receiver, Jon snatched it away, before the boy could follow through, "Are you kidding me, it would take you ten minutes to say hello!!"
Shawn and Feeny smirked as Jon greeted the caller. Turning his back he began to converse, with some hesitation. Feeny caught Jon's cue and tried to distract Shawn, "So Mr. Hunter, I peeked through and saw cards in there from Libby Harper and Veronica Watson. You might want to read those first." George stated, raising his eyebrows. Shawn's attention was immediately drawn to his letters. Thumbing through, he pulled a pink envelope from the middle of the pile and ran it under his nose. "Oh man, Channel.. I think it's number five." He whispered, ripping the card wide open with a groggy smile. Feeny smiled back, "That must be Libby." Shawn nodded, starting to read the inside.
Nurse Beverly returned with cups and spoons as promised. She began to dig into the water ice while Jon finished up his call. He hung up the phone and sighed, signaling to George to meet him in the hallway. Shawn was too enthralled in his reading to notice their departure. Once a good distance from Shawn's ears Jon felt it safe to talk. "That was Kelly Krause, she got a court date for me, next week, she wants to go ahead with my petition for adoption, they need to sit down with Shawn before Wednesday. Chet pled Guilty at his preliminary, this morning, they held him over for sentencing, he'll be behind bars by the end of the week, his brother Leo from Ohio is already on his way to take possession of the trailer and clean up Chet's affairs, they suggested I be at his allocution tomorrow morning, which means I got to break all this to Shawn by tonight!!! I can't do this George, I mean I'm going to fall apart, I just can't do this right now!!"
Jonathan began to pace nervously, running his fingers through his hair. His voice quivered with fear. George placed a firm hand on his shoulder, "Pull yourself together, Jon. You have to be strong for him, you have to do this, if not now, When??" Jon rolled his eyes and exhaled, "It's gotta be now...Please George, stay with me, I need you to help me. I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up big time." Feeny crossed his arms. "I'll stay if you want but this is not my business Jon, this is a very personal moment that should be reserved for you and Shawn only. Believe in yourself!! Trust Shawn!! You can do this..have faith." George patted Jon on the back. The two men stared eye to eye for a few moments. Jonathan finally, reluctantly, agreed to go back alone.
George gathered his coat and things, "Oh well, I'm off, I have a few errands to run before I head home and the weather is getting pretty bad, I will call you both this evening." George firmly shook Jon's hand, holding on a bit longer than normal. Jon winked, his hand trembling. Nurse Bev followed George out, leaving Jon alone to face his fears.
He lowered the rail to Shawn's bed and sat gently on the edge. Shawn looked up from his cards and immediately noticed the panic behind Jon's eyes. Placing the stack aside, he bit his lip and sat up as best he could, "Jon...what's wrong?" he asked, his eyes heavy with anticipation. "Shawn, I didn't want to hit you with this right away, but I don't have a choice. That was Kelly Krause on the phone; some things have been going on that you need to know about. Now you know what your dad did was really bad right?" Shawn closed his eyes and turned away, "OH GOD!! Please don't Jon, I can't deal with this right now." Shawn covered his eyes and began to squirm. Jon gently grabbed his wrists and leaned in closer. "Shawn!! Look at me and answer me, you realize what your father did to you was inexcusable, that he crossed the line this time." Shawn's eyes began to well with tears, looking Jon square in the face, he shook his head, "I don't even remember it Jon, and it's all a blur. I know he hurt me, but I can't remember what happened."
Shawn's lip began to quiver, but he kept his composure. Jon placed his hands on the boy's shoulders and continued. "Your dad, beat the daylights out of you and then left you for dead. He choked you so hard your eyes bled, and then he walked away. What he did is a crime, the beating he inflicted on you is beyond criminal. Even your dad realizes he went way to far this time because he turned himself into the police and begged for them to arrest him." Shawn shook his head violently, tears rolling from his eyes, "NO!! NO he doesn't belong in jail, he needs help, he didn't mean it!! He wouldn't.."
Jon placed his arms gently around Shawn as the boy began to cry, "I know this is hard Shawn and I know your going to defend him and excuse him and forgive him, like always, but the fact of the matter is your dad is in too deep this time and the state stepped in on your behalf and they are going forward with punishing him this time. He's gonna do time for this Shawn, he needs to do time for this."
Shawn sobbed, his face buried in Jon's chest. Shawn heaved heavily under Jon's gentle grasp, as he lovingly stroked the boys back. "SSSHHHH, please try to calm yourself down..Just breathe..Try and relax...You can't afford to spin out of control right now..." Jon's gentle encouragement helped soothe Shawn back into control as the boy steadied his breathing. After a few minutes Shawn leaned back and looked up at Jon with swollen, tear soaked eyes. "What's going to happen to him?" he whispered, barely audible.
"Well, he's in custody right now, tomorrow he has to go to court and tell the judge in his own words what he did and how he feels about it and then the judge will tell him his punishment, it's called sentencing, he will definitely do jail time for what he did to you, he could do anywhere from two to ten years. It's up to the judge." Shawn gasped, his eyes shut tightly, "TEN YEARS!!" He yelped, his voice cracking with shock. "Jon pursed his lips, "He's lucky it's not life!! Do you realize if he choked you for one more second you would be dead right now?? Think about this Shawn!! He's lucky you survived. With one stupid momentary lapse of judgment, he almost ended your life. You should be angry at him, he's got you so screwed up that you can't even see how much pain and suffering he's caused you, a few years in prison may bring him to realize how much damage he's done to you. Maybe one day YOU'LL realize that your life and well being is worth more than you think." Shawn stared wide-eyed at Jon, soaking in his words. A stray tear falling down his cheek, he took a deep breath.
Jonathan grabbed Shawn's hand and squeezed, "This whole experience made me realize something, kiddo!! I know now that you mean more to me than anything on this earth, almost loosing you was a real wake up call for me. It was a wake up call for your dad too!! He wants to go to jail Shawn, I know that sounds crazy, but he's hit rock bottom and knows this is the only way for him to clean up his act and maybe salvage what's left of his life. He didn't even want a lawyer or anything he just wants to be put away before he hurts anyone else." Shawn leaned back into his pillow, exhausted. Looking up he sighed deeply. "What's gonna happen to me now, Jon?"
Jon braced himself, it was now or never, his heart began to thump wildly inside his chest. His hands trembled with fear. Saying a silent prayer he locked eyes with the uncertain child in front of him. "Shawn...I should have done this a long time ago, I can't change what's happened, but I can do something to make sure it never happens again. When I saw you on the floor of the school, a heartbeat away from dying, I realized I was about to face my biggest fear. This whole thing was like a terrible nightmare. I realized you're the most important person in my life. I love you like a father should love a son. Before I knew it I was totally committed to you, to your life, and when I was in danger of losing you.. I couldn't handle it.. I fell to pieces..I need you Kiddo, I need you back with me, where I can protect you and guide you and be with you...I've been working with Kelly since you left, I filed a petition to adopt you, I want more than anything to have you as my son. But no matter how much I want that to happen..It doesn't mean anything unless you want it too, the only thing that matters in this world is what you want, and whatever that is Shawn...I'll make it happen.
Jon wavered; a stray sob escaped his lips. Shawn sat silent. His eyes were the epitome of shock and confusion. He couldn't believe his ears, momentarily wondering if he was dreaming or hallucinating. Shawn felt very winded and a little faint, it was all too much to handle for someone so weak and fragile. He felt as though he would pass out any moment. Jon leaned in, a bit concerned. It seemed as though it was an eternity of silence, "Shawn, talk to me, tell me what you want?"
Jon was so caught up in the forms, he barely noticed George Feeny sneak into the room. "Greetings!!" He whispered, trying hard not to disturb Shawn. Jon glanced up and smiled as George placed his things onto the rolling table at the foot of the bed. George peered over and studied the teen, while removing his heavy gloves, "He looks good, how's he doing?" Jon stretched and rose to greet George, "He's doing okay, he's in a lot of pain, but every time it gets out of hand, they dope him up pretty good.. It's going to take time. He hasn't really said too much yet, his throat is pretty sore, so he's not real talkative. After a few words he gets real winded. All he wanted to do today was brush his teeth, when he finished that he slept for two hours, he's pretty weak."
George and Jon shared a giggle while Feeny unpacked some items from his canvas bag, "I figured his throat would be tender so I brought him this." George pulled out a pint of chocolate water ice and placed it on the table. "I also knew you wouldn't be moving from that seat, so I brought you this." Feeny produced a double Philly Cheese steak and tossed it over to Jon. "George, you are a god among men!!" Turner unwrapped the sandwich and dug in gleefully. Nurse Bev strolled through the door, her usual cheerful self. "OOOHHHH WATER ICE!!! They musta thought you were crazy buying that in a blizzard!!" George chuckled, "They did!! Is it okay if he has this??" George queried, Nurse Bev shook her head and smiled, "Only if I can have some too." George leaned onto the bed rail, "Your more than welcome."
Nurse Beverly approached Shawn and took his vitals, like clockwork. While she was cleaning the lines on his IV, she accidentally woke him again. "Sorry sweetie, it's my job!!" Shawn rubbed his tired eyes, with his free hand. Moments later Beverly returned his left arm, after she was finished. Beverly leaned over and brushed some stray bangs out of the boy's eyes, as she removed the plastic mask from his face. "Thank God!!" Shawn silently mouthed as he scratched his nose. "Not so fast junior, were not finished." She replaced the mask with a more comfortable oxygen cannula, which fit just under Shawn's nose. The boy fiddled with the tube as Beverly crossed her arms, "Don't touch, hospital property, you break it, you buy it." Shawn smiled as he fidgeted to try to sit up. Jon reached in and raised the back of Shawn's bed, stopping just shy of a sitting position, as Beverly shot him the thumbs up. "There, now your ready for water ice." She stated as she placed the pint on his table. "Compliments of Mr. Feeny." Shawn's eyes lit up as he rubbed his sore throat.
"I'll be back in a jiffy with some cups and spoons, water ice party in Shawn's room." She joked as he hurried out into the hall. George, rose and dug deeper into his satchel, pulling out two large piles of cards and letters, "These are just some of the well wishes from your fellow students, it seems your quite popular in the halls of John Adams, we make a daily announcement during homeroom regarding your progress."
Mr. Feeny smiled as he handed Shawn the cards, Shawn caught his sleeve and tugged for him to move a bit closer. George leaned in and looked him in the eye. "I..just..wan. wanted to..say..Thanks!!" Shawn breathlessly whispered. The older man patted his arm, "Think nothing of it Mr. Hunter. Just know one thing...Don't ever run away from me...Run toward me. You should know by now, I would never hurt you." George firmly grasped his hand. Shawn closed his eyes and nodded, trying to catch his breath. George pulled up a chair and settled, as the phone rang on the side table. Instinctively, Shawn reached for the receiver, Jon snatched it away, before the boy could follow through, "Are you kidding me, it would take you ten minutes to say hello!!"
Shawn and Feeny smirked as Jon greeted the caller. Turning his back he began to converse, with some hesitation. Feeny caught Jon's cue and tried to distract Shawn, "So Mr. Hunter, I peeked through and saw cards in there from Libby Harper and Veronica Watson. You might want to read those first." George stated, raising his eyebrows. Shawn's attention was immediately drawn to his letters. Thumbing through, he pulled a pink envelope from the middle of the pile and ran it under his nose. "Oh man, Channel.. I think it's number five." He whispered, ripping the card wide open with a groggy smile. Feeny smiled back, "That must be Libby." Shawn nodded, starting to read the inside.
Nurse Beverly returned with cups and spoons as promised. She began to dig into the water ice while Jon finished up his call. He hung up the phone and sighed, signaling to George to meet him in the hallway. Shawn was too enthralled in his reading to notice their departure. Once a good distance from Shawn's ears Jon felt it safe to talk. "That was Kelly Krause, she got a court date for me, next week, she wants to go ahead with my petition for adoption, they need to sit down with Shawn before Wednesday. Chet pled Guilty at his preliminary, this morning, they held him over for sentencing, he'll be behind bars by the end of the week, his brother Leo from Ohio is already on his way to take possession of the trailer and clean up Chet's affairs, they suggested I be at his allocution tomorrow morning, which means I got to break all this to Shawn by tonight!!! I can't do this George, I mean I'm going to fall apart, I just can't do this right now!!"
Jonathan began to pace nervously, running his fingers through his hair. His voice quivered with fear. George placed a firm hand on his shoulder, "Pull yourself together, Jon. You have to be strong for him, you have to do this, if not now, When??" Jon rolled his eyes and exhaled, "It's gotta be now...Please George, stay with me, I need you to help me. I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up big time." Feeny crossed his arms. "I'll stay if you want but this is not my business Jon, this is a very personal moment that should be reserved for you and Shawn only. Believe in yourself!! Trust Shawn!! You can do this..have faith." George patted Jon on the back. The two men stared eye to eye for a few moments. Jonathan finally, reluctantly, agreed to go back alone.
George gathered his coat and things, "Oh well, I'm off, I have a few errands to run before I head home and the weather is getting pretty bad, I will call you both this evening." George firmly shook Jon's hand, holding on a bit longer than normal. Jon winked, his hand trembling. Nurse Bev followed George out, leaving Jon alone to face his fears.
He lowered the rail to Shawn's bed and sat gently on the edge. Shawn looked up from his cards and immediately noticed the panic behind Jon's eyes. Placing the stack aside, he bit his lip and sat up as best he could, "Jon...what's wrong?" he asked, his eyes heavy with anticipation. "Shawn, I didn't want to hit you with this right away, but I don't have a choice. That was Kelly Krause on the phone; some things have been going on that you need to know about. Now you know what your dad did was really bad right?" Shawn closed his eyes and turned away, "OH GOD!! Please don't Jon, I can't deal with this right now." Shawn covered his eyes and began to squirm. Jon gently grabbed his wrists and leaned in closer. "Shawn!! Look at me and answer me, you realize what your father did to you was inexcusable, that he crossed the line this time." Shawn's eyes began to well with tears, looking Jon square in the face, he shook his head, "I don't even remember it Jon, and it's all a blur. I know he hurt me, but I can't remember what happened."
Shawn's lip began to quiver, but he kept his composure. Jon placed his hands on the boy's shoulders and continued. "Your dad, beat the daylights out of you and then left you for dead. He choked you so hard your eyes bled, and then he walked away. What he did is a crime, the beating he inflicted on you is beyond criminal. Even your dad realizes he went way to far this time because he turned himself into the police and begged for them to arrest him." Shawn shook his head violently, tears rolling from his eyes, "NO!! NO he doesn't belong in jail, he needs help, he didn't mean it!! He wouldn't.."
Jon placed his arms gently around Shawn as the boy began to cry, "I know this is hard Shawn and I know your going to defend him and excuse him and forgive him, like always, but the fact of the matter is your dad is in too deep this time and the state stepped in on your behalf and they are going forward with punishing him this time. He's gonna do time for this Shawn, he needs to do time for this."
Shawn sobbed, his face buried in Jon's chest. Shawn heaved heavily under Jon's gentle grasp, as he lovingly stroked the boys back. "SSSHHHH, please try to calm yourself down..Just breathe..Try and relax...You can't afford to spin out of control right now..." Jon's gentle encouragement helped soothe Shawn back into control as the boy steadied his breathing. After a few minutes Shawn leaned back and looked up at Jon with swollen, tear soaked eyes. "What's going to happen to him?" he whispered, barely audible.
"Well, he's in custody right now, tomorrow he has to go to court and tell the judge in his own words what he did and how he feels about it and then the judge will tell him his punishment, it's called sentencing, he will definitely do jail time for what he did to you, he could do anywhere from two to ten years. It's up to the judge." Shawn gasped, his eyes shut tightly, "TEN YEARS!!" He yelped, his voice cracking with shock. "Jon pursed his lips, "He's lucky it's not life!! Do you realize if he choked you for one more second you would be dead right now?? Think about this Shawn!! He's lucky you survived. With one stupid momentary lapse of judgment, he almost ended your life. You should be angry at him, he's got you so screwed up that you can't even see how much pain and suffering he's caused you, a few years in prison may bring him to realize how much damage he's done to you. Maybe one day YOU'LL realize that your life and well being is worth more than you think." Shawn stared wide-eyed at Jon, soaking in his words. A stray tear falling down his cheek, he took a deep breath.
Jonathan grabbed Shawn's hand and squeezed, "This whole experience made me realize something, kiddo!! I know now that you mean more to me than anything on this earth, almost loosing you was a real wake up call for me. It was a wake up call for your dad too!! He wants to go to jail Shawn, I know that sounds crazy, but he's hit rock bottom and knows this is the only way for him to clean up his act and maybe salvage what's left of his life. He didn't even want a lawyer or anything he just wants to be put away before he hurts anyone else." Shawn leaned back into his pillow, exhausted. Looking up he sighed deeply. "What's gonna happen to me now, Jon?"
Jon braced himself, it was now or never, his heart began to thump wildly inside his chest. His hands trembled with fear. Saying a silent prayer he locked eyes with the uncertain child in front of him. "Shawn...I should have done this a long time ago, I can't change what's happened, but I can do something to make sure it never happens again. When I saw you on the floor of the school, a heartbeat away from dying, I realized I was about to face my biggest fear. This whole thing was like a terrible nightmare. I realized you're the most important person in my life. I love you like a father should love a son. Before I knew it I was totally committed to you, to your life, and when I was in danger of losing you.. I couldn't handle it.. I fell to pieces..I need you Kiddo, I need you back with me, where I can protect you and guide you and be with you...I've been working with Kelly since you left, I filed a petition to adopt you, I want more than anything to have you as my son. But no matter how much I want that to happen..It doesn't mean anything unless you want it too, the only thing that matters in this world is what you want, and whatever that is Shawn...I'll make it happen.
Jon wavered; a stray sob escaped his lips. Shawn sat silent. His eyes were the epitome of shock and confusion. He couldn't believe his ears, momentarily wondering if he was dreaming or hallucinating. Shawn felt very winded and a little faint, it was all too much to handle for someone so weak and fragile. He felt as though he would pass out any moment. Jon leaned in, a bit concerned. It seemed as though it was an eternity of silence, "Shawn, talk to me, tell me what you want?"
