The alarm's radio buzzed into life at 9am and Chandler threw out a lazy arm to switch it off. He pulled his hot face from the pillow, sticky with drool and blinked at the harsh sunlight. His head was dizzy with heat but he needed to pull the blanket around him tightly to shut out the cold air rising up from the doorway. He'd left it open last night? He didn't remember getting in at all. Last thing was Joey… yes, Joey and Monica. They'd put him to bed. He pulled the blanket even tighter and tiptoed into Joey's room. Even in these cold temperatures he was lying idly naked with his quilt tucked between his legs thankfully obscuring any sight of… a sharp pain hit Chandler between the eyes and he cried out briefly. It was loud enough to wake Joey. "Chand?" Chandler clutched the bridge of his nose and nodded, sucking hard, icy air between his teeth to prevent him from whimpering again. "Where's Monica?" he groaned.

          "At home I guess. Did you expect her to be here or something?" Joey wrapped his quilt so it gave him a little modesty. "I don't know…" sighed Chandler. "I remember… a guy's number!" His eyes sprang open. "She's found a guy! She…" He could've broken down right then if he didn't feel so sick from last night. Joey crawled down the bed and pressed his hand on Chandler's forehead. "Whoa, you're burning up! Go to bed, I'll get you some cold medicine." Chandler stumbled out of the room and fell into his bed. He felt a little better about Monica now. It's just a date… just one… He fell asleep again. Joey had found some boxers by then and was headed to the kitchen to make up a hot drink. He wasn't sure which one Chandler liked and, by peeking through the wide open door, he could see that he was in no condition to talk. A little while later Chandler felt Joey gently rocking him awake, telling him to drink something. He held out a cup. Chandler opened his mouth slightly then closed it again mumbling about drunken liaisons with Halle Berry. "Man…" Joey spoke to himself, "Serves you right for trying to swim in the snow last night." He chuckled and remembered the small spark between Monica and Chandler as she had scolded him and dragged him through the doors and upstairs to their homes. How tenderly she had laid his hand on his pillow after Joey had simply thrown him on the bed. But it was a spark and nothing more, he regarded sadly. Not too sadly. Because now he had his roommate back with him where he belonged.

          After a hefty 29hour sleep, Chandler woke to the sounds of Phoebe and Joey in a heated game of foosball. He tried to get up but his legs were tired and his arms shaky. His lips were dry but he managed to call out faintly to them. They heard nothing at first and Phoebe scored a goal. "Yeah! I like, rule your ass!"

          "Pheebs?" he tried again.

          "Chandler? Oh my god, yey!" She ran into his bedroom. Joey stole the Malteaser they had been using for a ball and ate it before joining them. Phoebe was stood over Chandler and ranting feverishly, "Ok thanks to you I've lost 2 bets and your recliner!"

          "Wha?" muttered Chandler.

          "I bet Ross that you'd go home with Brian and you didn't. Then I bet Joey it'd be Gil and you didn't go home with him either. Then I asked Joey if you died from this illness, could I have your recliner. And damn you, you're alive." Then she added, "Of course, that's good too." Chandler remembered Brian. And Gil. "Noooooooo…" he wailed into his pillow. "I'm such a man-whore!"

          "Uh-huh, yah." Phoebe crossed her arms. "But your lobster and fairy mermaid are here to make sure you get well and go back to work and apologise to Gil." He simply nodded and then noticed he had no pyjamas on. His face flushed a deep crimson and he looked nervously at Phoebe. "Oh come on, I massage guys all the time. You're actually not bad compared to some of them."

Chandler couldn't resist a joke at her expense; "Good enough for you to bite me?" Phoebe stuck out her tongue and winked. "Maybe." She waltzed out of the room notifying them that she was headed to the coffee house. "Oh I'll stay here with Chandler," Joey answered.

          "I'll be fine…" But Joey was already going to boil up some more of the cold medicine drink. "Lemon or blackcurrant?" he called to his sick buddy, ignoring Phoebe's swipe at his head when she discovered the missing foosball ball. "Lemon," he replied, nestling into the blanket and jumping slightly at the sound of the door closing. Phoebe tended to slam. Joey walked in stirring the drink then pointed at Chandler's naked body with the spoon and said, "Your clothes were wet. So I undressed you."

"Oh…" he took the drink and sipped it slowly. "This makes quite a change, huh? You looking after me." he said between sips.

"Yeah…" Joey beamed. Chandler almost dropped his drink when he realised. "Your play, how'd it go?"

"I missed it."

"You? You… missed it? How…" it dawned on him. "You stayed with me…" Albeit the oversleeping had made him more emotional then he'd like to be, but it had no control over his next action and he felt no qualms about hugging Joey then and there.

They all decided to miss the New Year's party at Chandler's office and spent the night at Monica's. Or Monica and Daniel's she told them to call it and this amused Chandler to no end. She really respected that this was a human being, one for her to raise and teach and mould. Without his help, he'd requested of her. "I don't want him as screwed up as I am," he quipped and they'd laughed like old times. Just as they were all laughing now: in the sitting room drinking and chatting huddled over a card game gone awry. Ross had wanted to get out Monopoly or Risk but the others had managed to persuade him with the advice that he and Monica became WAY too involved in these things. Phoebe watched now as Joey slid his hand over Chandler's to pick up a new card and she sighed in frustration. A small piteous cry from the baby distracted Monica out of the room and they all stifled giggles as they swapped cards around and looked at hers. She caught them and gave them a huge lecture on cheating. Then promptly stole one of Andy's cards to give herself a royal flush and won the game. She licked a finger as she counted the dollar bills taking glee in the mortified look on their faces. The phone rang. "Let the machine get it," she said, re-shuffling the cards deftly.

The machine beeped and the new message rolled, "Hi Monica? It's me Gil, I'm sorry you couldn't make it tonight. I just wanted to wish you a happy new year and I hope you feel better tomorrow. Call me!" The machine beeped again. Monica dropped the cards and tried to read Chandler's face. His first emotion – recognition. He knew Gil's voice right away. The second was surprise followed shortly by confusion. Then… nausea? They were all watching him now. "What?" Nervously, he shifted back onto his butt and crossed his legs in front of him. Inside, he wished he felt angry, or betrayed but instead he felt horrified that Gil would be contacting his ex-wife, when he supposedly had a crush on him. Maybe Gil swung both ways, he pondered. He'd been silent for too long and their eyes burned into his flesh. A searing, crushing wave of angst. Then a breeze of relief on his left arm… Joey was holding it and asking him something. The blood rushing in his ears drowned out the sound. He craned to hear it. "Are you Ok?" Joey shook his arm again. Chandler was looking right through him and then his eyes focused into Joey's and he murmured an answer, looking away as he did so. "Huh?" Joey lowered his head to meet his eyes again. "Gil… I think he's… oh, it doesn't matter." He got up and said something about having a great time to Monica, then turned tail and rushed out of the apartment. It was Rachel who broke the silence with a matter-of-fact comment by saying, "Wasn't Gil the guy who Brian dumped a few weeks ago?"

          "Oh!" Monica put her hand to her mouth. He was trying to warn me…

          She hurled her tiny frame at his door in an attempt to break it down. "Chandler!" she yelled. The others watched with intrigue. "She won't hurt herself will she?" asked Andy.

          "Nah, she's tougher than she looks," Phoebe said, accidentally spitting out bits of the trail mix she was eating, obviously enjoying the scene.

          "Chandler? It's Ok, really! If you know something about Gil, I'll believe you!" But nothing. She turned back to them, shrugging wistfully. They went back inside. Midnight approached and the only one Chandler let in was Joey. After all, he did live there. Monica tried to slide in when Joey did but Chandler caught her in time and pushed her out with a struggled whine of, "Sorry." Joey looked at Chandler for a while and then asked which phase of the break-up he was in. Chandler answered honestly: he wasn't sure. They sat for a while watching late-night erotica. Joey became rather excited by it but Chandler seemed immune with grief. "I'll kill him," he announced after a while.

          "Chandler you couldn't kill a fly. I've seen you trying and deliberately missing them with the newspaper. You can't take the guilt." Chandler laughed and stroked the arm of the chair. The leather was old and used now and wonderfully soft to touch. "You're right, Joe," he said after a while, "I'm a big fat wuss."

          "That's why I'm the lobster with the big claw, like on that documentary Ross made us watch, for smashing other lobsters that hurt you," Joey got up and imitated himself beating up little lobsters. Chandler laughed again. "I forgot to thank you, y'know? For saving me from the evil many-handed octopus, Brian." Joey looked up at him with an unreadable expression. "Anytime." That look bothered Chandler for the rest of the night.

          A warm undercurrent of air moved through Chandler's bedroom and he shifted uncomfortably in his bed. He awoke, fearing his fever may have come back, but found that he was simply just overly warm. He took off his pyjamas and tried to sleep again. It was no use. He stormed out to check the thermostat. Broken again. Was it some kind of seasonal tradition? To die of heat? He opened the fridge and hunted for a cool drink. He heard a creak behind him. He swivelled around and saw Joey scratching his stomach. "Hot, ain't it?" he yawned. Chandler slammed the door shut so neither of them could see the other's bare body by the light and sneaked past Joey towards his room. But it was just light enough by the glow of the crisp moonlight. "Well Mr Self-shame has nakeyfied too? See, I'm not a pervert coz I sleep naked!" chuckled Joey.

Chandler poked him in the chest, "We're not all exhibitionists." Joey simply flashed a smile at him and that was a decent enough retort for him. Keeping his eyes level, Chandler went back into his room. "The heating's gone screwy," Joey moaned and then rummaged in the fridge a few seconds later. Chandler felt his eyelids drooping despite the heat and he had soon gone to dreamland. Joey munched on a sandwich and sat on his recliner to enjoy some more late-night erotica. There didn't seem to be any on which was strange but he soon found a channel still porning away and he finished off his sandwich quickly and enjoyed the rest of the night alone.

          Catching Joey snoring and naked on a recliner wasn't exactly how Chandler wanted to start the day but it was the first thing he saw when he left his room. He threw a blanket over him before marching down to see why the heating was being so retarded lately. He was offered a lame explanation, and had to march back up again in a fury. Monica met him on the landing. "Your heating is on high too?" he asked, blushing slightly. She nodded then went over and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks, for caring about my feelings like that." He shrugged, blushing more. Why, why, why? The fighting wasn't that bad surely? He bit his lip to prevent him from voicing that thought. He excused himself and went back into the apartment. Joey was dressed and munching some breakfast. "Any luck?"

          "Nah, stupid bastards," he grumbled back scouring the newspaper for any interesting articles. Joey shrugged and crunched his cereal noisily. "Gonna confront Gil on Monday?" Silence. "No." A longer silence. "Ok." Joey dropped the spoon into the bowl and threw them both in the sink. "I've got an audition later. Wanna come?"

          "Sure."

Joey stood in front of Chandler, "Come on man, get over it!"

          "You've no idea what it's like…"

          "I thought you said you were over it."

          "I though I was… maybe I'll never be over it. I have no soul mate," he sobbed bitter tears that nestled in the corners of his mouth.

          "You've got your lobster!" Joey reasoned. "I'm all you need. We'll get you a mermaid now and then, just for laying and- "

          "I don't want to just lay someone. I want to be with someone forever. Someone to hold and, and love…"

          "But you never wanted that! Not until Monica put it in your head- "

          "Monica…" Her name set him off bawling. "Daniel…" He shook as a flurry of hiccups overtook his body. Joey hugged him closely. "They'll always be here. But your soul mate is somewhere else."

          "My *hic* lobster… Joe…"

          "Yep, me."

          "And you'll *hic* get me mermaids?"

          "A whole school of them." His grip slackened and Chandler's hiccups subsided. He looked at him with shining wet eyes. "Joey…" he sighed. Joey moved into the sigh and kissed it away not caring why he did it. Reasons meant nothing right now.