Just Because

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A/N: Whoah hey, this fic is scary, folks. Mad revisin' is goin' on here, you betcha.

...Hoo boy, I wouldn't go near this with a ten-foot pole if I had the choice.

And this was for my dearest Riyn, no less... Who has disappeared, and I fear the worst... Perhaps this accounts for her disappearance. I'm sorry, luvvy! I should have known better...

Ohhh man. Bad internal monologues (and wannabe!schizophrenia!), begone:wails in misery:

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Just Because

-a short isaac.ivan (or possibly ivan.isaac) fanfic-

"Do you love me because I'm beautiful, or am I beautiful because you love me?" - Oscar Hammerstein

Isaac was pondering a question that had bothered him ever since the day Garet had joked around with him about something. And that was a long time ago. A very long time ago, around the time of when they had arrived at Tolbi. That was well over a year ago. When he had consulted Mia about it, she had given him a strange, you're hopeless sort of look and said that it was written in his own destiny to figure that out himself. He found that her advice wasn't very much helpful, but he refrained from telling her for fear of losing an arm. He completely skipped over Garet, knowing he'd get the laugh and hearty slap on the back, regardless of the serious tone in his voice, and asked Ivan the same question, and Ivan only laughed.

The question was, which way did he lean towards?

At first, he thought he was sure that he leaned towards women. But after meeting Mia and kissing her under the mistletoe at Christmastime, he decided maybe... Well, Mia just wasn't the one for him, right? Yeah. Way too motherly, or something. There was Jenna...

...He kissed Jenna. Nada. He grew up with her, and kissing her was like... No. Just no.

Isaac was starting to get thoroughly worried. Sheba? ...Nah. If anything, he looked at Sheba like a kid sister. And he certainly didn't like men!

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Isaac dropped his head into his hands, the sigh escaping his body making his shoulders rise and slump dramatically.

Or did he?

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He found Felix mature in more than one way, and intriguing with his silence and natural mystery. Garet was...ideal...in some sort of twisted fashion, with his brusque honesty, but, er, well. Isaac had no need to dwell on him for long. Seamen, Picard included, were tough and hardy; certainly not easy to fall under pressure. And Ivan was just...

He was just...

What was up with Ivan?

Alright, he was, he was -- just say it already! -- cute.

If Garet had heard him say that -- say that about another guy, much less the annoying pipsqueak of their team -- he'd probably would have gotten a hefty hit from him over the head and a demand for an explanation. Because it wasn't that Garet was so narrow-minded; it was just Ivan. It probably helped that Garet and Ivan had rarely gotten along during their trip, but, nonetheless...

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Isaac sighed again and slumped back against the tree behind him, kicking his feet weakly in the loose dirt. His life was such a mess. A praised golden hero and savior of the world, and he wasn't even sure of his orientation -- yeesh, it was him that was such a tremendous mess. He admired Mia, Jenna and Sheba for their courage, their strengths, their beauty... But he only admired them, as one would admire a doll in a glass case. He didn't love any of them, right?

Of course not. Just as sister figures.

He liked...the same gender, right?

...It seemed like it.

It's not fair! His mind cried out. Why can I be... normal? Like everyone else?

-Because you're special.-

Wait, what?

Isaac sat up. Trees didn't talk. He looked down at the grass. Acorns certainly didn't talk, and squirrels... well, he was pretty sure Garet was wrong about them talking. So...?

-You're special... everyone is.-

I'm getting a pep talk from nature! Shrieked Isaac's mind. This just isn't happening! I know I'm a Venus adept, but this is insane!

-I have to say... especially you.-

What are you implying? Is that a good or a bad thing!

-You can choose for yourself...-

Isaac frowned, leaning back down upon the tree's rough bark. Think calmly. Was that your Djinn? Nah, they'd be snider in their comments. Why bother being mysterious with their self-proclaimed "master"? But he heard it only in his mind, meaning --

Nonononono!

It's...it's not possible!

-Afraid it is.-

Ivan! I hate you!

-I'm sorry...-

Get out! Get out! OUT!

There was a pop, then rustling and a soft thud. Isaac turned around to see a sheepish Jupiter adept with a twig in his hair sitting up in a low branch above his head.

"Why did you...?" He asked incredulously, staring up at the other blond, the flare of anger dying down and simmering slowly into a clump of frantic worry.

"I was in the tree first." Ivan said defensively, shifting around to lie on his back in the curve of the wood. Isaac snorted and looked back down at the grass before him, unable to meet his eyes for long.

"That gives you no reason to Mind Read me while I'm...freaking out over certain things," he muttered, plucking at the green tufts they were sitting on.

"I thought you knew long before that I don't regard those kind of rules." Ivan returned to being haughty, one of the few moods Isaac knew him to feel completely comfortable in.

Isaac chucked an acorn at him, shaking his head with another exasperated sigh.

He didn't expect the acorn to come whizzing back at him, bouncing off the back of his skull. Ivan slunk out of the tree and sat down next to him, arms crossed over his chest.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay, but I get worried when I see my former leader just clamming up like that and not telling the rest of us what he's thinking about!" He said angrily, a flush staining his cheeks.

"Are you saying I'm not serious? Ivan, how many times do I have to correct you on that -- "

"Okay, okay, already!" Ivan sighed impatiently, throwing up his hands. "I'm sorry. Really," he added, pouting slightly at him.

Isaac glowered at him silently, debating whether to give in or not. Then, with a huff of indignation, he went back to staring at the ground.

"But..." The Jupiter adept murmured delicately, "Why...do you think I'm cute?"

Isaac blushed a bright red color, glad he was looking at the grass littered with leaves and twigs, rather than the "cute" face of the wind adept sitting next to him.

"I, um... You should know." Isaac said hastily, weakly, sliding further down the side of the tree, to the point that he was laying his head on the roots. Ivan moved around to grin at his face.

"Do I?" He asked cheekily, raising his eyebrows.

Isaac closed his eyes, reveling at his ability to want to smack him and throw his arms around him at the same time. Yes you do. Now go leave me alone!

He felt a weight on his left shoulder and cracked open one eye to see Ivan resting his head there. Propping himself up on his right elbow, careful to not dislodge him, Isaac reached up with his left hand to pluck the twig out of Ivan's hair.

Yes, he is cute.

"Why am I cute, Isaac?" Ivan asked, sounding like an innocent child asking an innocent question. Oh, but Ivan was so far from innocent, Isaac knew. Just having Mind Read as one of his innate abilities immediately dashed all hopes of purity...

"Because you are. Just because." Isaac said, sliding his left arm under Ivan's shoulder blades and pulling him a little closer. Ivan's blonde hair tickled his chin.

"Just because?" Ivan whispered.

"Just because." Isaac whispered back, pressing a butterfly kiss to Ivan's cheek.

And thus, Isaac's fears were quelled. Except for the uproar that was sure to follow from Garet. And that could wait.

Just because.

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Man, I sucked. Ehh, twenty reviews for this? I gratefully partake, reviewers, but I have to wonder.

And look, I'll revise this again in another two years. Heh. I love my cyclical life.

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. : . because normalcy...is overrated . : .