Chapter 3 of Toilet Troubles
Disclaimer: We don't own lord of the rings or anything associated with it except Legolas posters and an action figure. Once again, Kiwi runs in shouting "I got another Legolas poster at my church festival the other night!! And my mom bought me the LotR books boxed set! And Legolas is on the 2nd one!!!!" Pineapple Princess runs in as well "HEY! I just found a recipe for Lembas! And I made them without burning them! And they even taste good!" Yes, well, anyway, more stuff if coming to our possession in the future. "Come hither, Legolas."
Thanks to Brigette who reviewed for chapter 2 but was unable to cuz the stupid computer!
Note: Last chapter, ff.net was acting weird and screwed everything up and Kiwi tried reposting the chapter. Sorry for the inconvenience of reading and we will try again later.
Back in chapter 2, *Dreamy distortion of the screen* we noticed Lord Celeborn with a beer can in his hand. As we recall, it hit Eowyn. Celeborn approached the toilet. *dreamy distortion to the present*
Celeborn came towards the toilet and crashed into the leafy screen, almost knocking it down. He tripped on Eowyn and his face fell straight into the toilet. He passed out and would have drowned if Eowyn hadn't done what she did next. Eowyn flushed and Celeborn woke up and pulled his head out of the water fast. *BONK* He hit his head on the edge of the toilet. "Ew!" quoth Pineapple Princess. "Especially after what Elrond did in there!"
Lord Celeborn rubbed his head and stumbled over towards the mirror with a glazed look in his eyes. In his drunken stupor, he reached for the pitcher and to Eowyn's horror, used it as a chamber pot! "Oh no! What if Galadriel finds out?! He's doomed!!!" Eowyn thought, and tried to flush a warning to the elf lord, but even in his drunken state Celeborn does not speak toilet. Celeborn passed out and fell over. Since there was nothing Eowyn could do, she hoped for the best. All of the drama of the day had finally caught up with Eowyn and she fell asleep. When she woke up, Celeborn was gone and in walked Elrond with another fluffy bundle. "Not again!" Eowyn groaned, or rather flushed. But Elrond took no notice of the self flushing toilet, he had grown accustomed to the oddity of it.
When Elrond unwrapped the towel this time, there were two hedgehogs! Elrond cooed again and again, once more frightening Eowyn. Elrond picked up the pitcher to pour water into the mirror but was disgusted, and tossed the pitcher away from him, luckily for our protagonist, not in the direction of Eowyn.
For a moment Elrond stood blinking at the hedgehogs in the empty basin, but then decided to try some different tactics, seeing as how the pitcher was now inaccessible. First, he tried to bring water over in his hands by forming a cup but was unsuccessful. Then he tried slurping up the water into his mouth and spitting it out into the mirror, but that proved to tedious, not to mention the possible bacteria that could be passed to his lovely pets. Frustrated with his inability to fill the basin, He just picked the mirror up and filled it to the top from the stream.
To the horror of Eowyn and the poor cute little hedgehogs, Elrond suddenly changed. His eyes turned red and bloodshot and he hissed. "Nooo! They stole it from us! The precious!!!! My porcupine!!" Elrond burst out crying and returned to normal and fled to the nearest corner. "But we likes our hedgehogs!" "No!!! Porcupines are better!" Elrond cried and cried and began scrubbing one of his little hedgehogs. Suddenly he hissed again and he dropped the hedgehog into the water.
The hedgehog, not knowing how to swim, drowned in the mirror. Elrond returned to normal and was horrified! His dear hedgehog, which he had lovingly named Mitzi, was floating belly up in the small pool. He looked at his other hedgehog, Smith, and his eyes began to mist over. He grabbed Smith and ran away in hysterics, realizing he could not take care of any animals in his current state. "I need my medication." Elrond thought out loud, traumatized by the drowned hedgehog episode. He didn't want to be put to blame so he fled the Golden Wood. Outside of Lorien, he dumped the other poor hedgehog in the dumpster.
Meanwhile, back at the mirror, a whistle blew. "Everyone out of the pool!!! Everyone out I said!! Out out out!!" Rumil cried and jumped from the stairs and continued to blow the whistle. "This place gets stranger and stranger the longer I'm here." thought Eowyn. He ran towards the mirror and picked up the little hedgehog and laid it down beside the mirror. He began to try to get the water out of the Mitzi's lungs. "Just breathe, man!" Rumil cried between giving the hedgehog CPR "This is not cool!" Finally, Mitzi began coughing up water and opened her eyes. Rumil took the little hedgehog loving into his arms and began talking to it. "It's ok buddy, you're safe now." much to the delight of Eowyn and fully certified, trained, and always prepared for anything, lifeguard Rumil.
Annoyed by the loud racket of Rumil, Galadriel hurries to the mirror, knowing something must be wrong. When she sees the hedgehog by her mirror, her motherly instincts and natural elfie love for all things that grow, not to mention her foul disposition due to someone dabbling in her mirror, take over. She began harshly grilling Rumil.
"What happened here?!" She demanded, Scaring the begeezus out of Rumil, nearly causing him to drop Mitzi. Rumil explained that he found the hedgehog drowning in her mirror and had seen a suspicious individual fleeing the scene. He didn't pursue the mysterious elf because the poor hedgehog's life was hanging in the balance.
"Are you trying to tell me a hedgehog was swimming in my mirror?!"
"Well, uh."
"Is THAT what you're trying to tell me?"
"Not exact-"
"You are telling me a hedgehog just decided to take a swim in MY MIRROR?!"
"No I was trying to say-"
"Out with it, boy!"
"I was trying to tell you but-"
"No buts about it! Tell me NOW!"
"That weird guy was washing it!!! With BUBBLE BATH!"
"Oh my gosh! My mirror!!" Galadriel's wrath grew and grew. She reached for her pitcher, which was oddly lying on the ground on the other side of the small clearing, so she could rinse the mirror out. But when she saw the contents of the pitcher screamed and threw it back across the clearing. Galadriel's wrath was stirred. Her eyes tinted an odd color of green, and she almost seemed to grow. A great gust of wind swirled through the clearing as Galadriel's fingers laced themselves around Rumil's neck.
~~~~~~~~~~
Please review! If you do, you will get a special surprise gift in your email inbox! Also, if you review, we will love you forever and ever!
Disclaimer: We don't own lord of the rings or anything associated with it except Legolas posters and an action figure. Once again, Kiwi runs in shouting "I got another Legolas poster at my church festival the other night!! And my mom bought me the LotR books boxed set! And Legolas is on the 2nd one!!!!" Pineapple Princess runs in as well "HEY! I just found a recipe for Lembas! And I made them without burning them! And they even taste good!" Yes, well, anyway, more stuff if coming to our possession in the future. "Come hither, Legolas."
Thanks to Brigette who reviewed for chapter 2 but was unable to cuz the stupid computer!
Note: Last chapter, ff.net was acting weird and screwed everything up and Kiwi tried reposting the chapter. Sorry for the inconvenience of reading and we will try again later.
Back in chapter 2, *Dreamy distortion of the screen* we noticed Lord Celeborn with a beer can in his hand. As we recall, it hit Eowyn. Celeborn approached the toilet. *dreamy distortion to the present*
Celeborn came towards the toilet and crashed into the leafy screen, almost knocking it down. He tripped on Eowyn and his face fell straight into the toilet. He passed out and would have drowned if Eowyn hadn't done what she did next. Eowyn flushed and Celeborn woke up and pulled his head out of the water fast. *BONK* He hit his head on the edge of the toilet. "Ew!" quoth Pineapple Princess. "Especially after what Elrond did in there!"
Lord Celeborn rubbed his head and stumbled over towards the mirror with a glazed look in his eyes. In his drunken stupor, he reached for the pitcher and to Eowyn's horror, used it as a chamber pot! "Oh no! What if Galadriel finds out?! He's doomed!!!" Eowyn thought, and tried to flush a warning to the elf lord, but even in his drunken state Celeborn does not speak toilet. Celeborn passed out and fell over. Since there was nothing Eowyn could do, she hoped for the best. All of the drama of the day had finally caught up with Eowyn and she fell asleep. When she woke up, Celeborn was gone and in walked Elrond with another fluffy bundle. "Not again!" Eowyn groaned, or rather flushed. But Elrond took no notice of the self flushing toilet, he had grown accustomed to the oddity of it.
When Elrond unwrapped the towel this time, there were two hedgehogs! Elrond cooed again and again, once more frightening Eowyn. Elrond picked up the pitcher to pour water into the mirror but was disgusted, and tossed the pitcher away from him, luckily for our protagonist, not in the direction of Eowyn.
For a moment Elrond stood blinking at the hedgehogs in the empty basin, but then decided to try some different tactics, seeing as how the pitcher was now inaccessible. First, he tried to bring water over in his hands by forming a cup but was unsuccessful. Then he tried slurping up the water into his mouth and spitting it out into the mirror, but that proved to tedious, not to mention the possible bacteria that could be passed to his lovely pets. Frustrated with his inability to fill the basin, He just picked the mirror up and filled it to the top from the stream.
To the horror of Eowyn and the poor cute little hedgehogs, Elrond suddenly changed. His eyes turned red and bloodshot and he hissed. "Nooo! They stole it from us! The precious!!!! My porcupine!!" Elrond burst out crying and returned to normal and fled to the nearest corner. "But we likes our hedgehogs!" "No!!! Porcupines are better!" Elrond cried and cried and began scrubbing one of his little hedgehogs. Suddenly he hissed again and he dropped the hedgehog into the water.
The hedgehog, not knowing how to swim, drowned in the mirror. Elrond returned to normal and was horrified! His dear hedgehog, which he had lovingly named Mitzi, was floating belly up in the small pool. He looked at his other hedgehog, Smith, and his eyes began to mist over. He grabbed Smith and ran away in hysterics, realizing he could not take care of any animals in his current state. "I need my medication." Elrond thought out loud, traumatized by the drowned hedgehog episode. He didn't want to be put to blame so he fled the Golden Wood. Outside of Lorien, he dumped the other poor hedgehog in the dumpster.
Meanwhile, back at the mirror, a whistle blew. "Everyone out of the pool!!! Everyone out I said!! Out out out!!" Rumil cried and jumped from the stairs and continued to blow the whistle. "This place gets stranger and stranger the longer I'm here." thought Eowyn. He ran towards the mirror and picked up the little hedgehog and laid it down beside the mirror. He began to try to get the water out of the Mitzi's lungs. "Just breathe, man!" Rumil cried between giving the hedgehog CPR "This is not cool!" Finally, Mitzi began coughing up water and opened her eyes. Rumil took the little hedgehog loving into his arms and began talking to it. "It's ok buddy, you're safe now." much to the delight of Eowyn and fully certified, trained, and always prepared for anything, lifeguard Rumil.
Annoyed by the loud racket of Rumil, Galadriel hurries to the mirror, knowing something must be wrong. When she sees the hedgehog by her mirror, her motherly instincts and natural elfie love for all things that grow, not to mention her foul disposition due to someone dabbling in her mirror, take over. She began harshly grilling Rumil.
"What happened here?!" She demanded, Scaring the begeezus out of Rumil, nearly causing him to drop Mitzi. Rumil explained that he found the hedgehog drowning in her mirror and had seen a suspicious individual fleeing the scene. He didn't pursue the mysterious elf because the poor hedgehog's life was hanging in the balance.
"Are you trying to tell me a hedgehog was swimming in my mirror?!"
"Well, uh."
"Is THAT what you're trying to tell me?"
"Not exact-"
"You are telling me a hedgehog just decided to take a swim in MY MIRROR?!"
"No I was trying to say-"
"Out with it, boy!"
"I was trying to tell you but-"
"No buts about it! Tell me NOW!"
"That weird guy was washing it!!! With BUBBLE BATH!"
"Oh my gosh! My mirror!!" Galadriel's wrath grew and grew. She reached for her pitcher, which was oddly lying on the ground on the other side of the small clearing, so she could rinse the mirror out. But when she saw the contents of the pitcher screamed and threw it back across the clearing. Galadriel's wrath was stirred. Her eyes tinted an odd color of green, and she almost seemed to grow. A great gust of wind swirled through the clearing as Galadriel's fingers laced themselves around Rumil's neck.
~~~~~~~~~~
Please review! If you do, you will get a special surprise gift in your email inbox! Also, if you review, we will love you forever and ever!
