A/N: Yes yes, I've taken excerpts from "parting on good terms" and inserted them as a flashback. I figure there's nothing wrong with stealing from one's own fics. Actually, I consider PoGT to be sort of a prequel.

As for Sierra being Nash's wife, it is not a proven fact, but it is highly likely. (much to my despair) I was hoping Nash was lying about his marital status to convince Chris he wasn't being flirtatious, but somehow I know that isn't likely.

Straya, I tried to take your advice and edited some stuff, but forgive me if there still are some errors. Old habits die hard, hehe.

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Chapter Three - Memory

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She still remembered his words that night they went their separate ways as clearly as though he had just said them.

*~*~*~*~*

"I know what you think I am; an immoral charmer, a ladies man. I can't say you're completely wrong. I can't say that flirting with you was a rarity in my character. I can't say that I treated you any different than I did any other young woman. But that's before I got to know you.

"I'm not going to beat around the bush with this. You probably think I'm trying to seduce you right now, but I don't care what you think at the moment as long as you hear me out. I care for you deeply, Chris. In fact, I've fallen in love with you. This is the truth.

"I wouldn't believe it myself for the longest time. After all, I'm a married man and a harmless skirt-chaser. On top of that, I had no idea it was possible to. . . well. . . to be in love with two people at once. But it has happened.

"This, of course, does not change anything. Regardless of whether you reciprocate or not, we are both duty bound and the whole thing simply isn't possible. I know that. You know that. But I couldn't leave without telling you. And I can't say for certain what is going through your mind at the moment. But there's only one way to find out, and that's not by asking you. I know you'll say you hate me regardless of what the truth is."

".I'm going to kiss you."

*~*~*~*~*

She would have never expected him to even show up in her room that night, much less confess that he was in love with her. She would have never expected that he might be serious about what he was saying, and she never would have thought that he'd refuse to take advantage of her because of the matter of honor.

And even after precisely that happened, she somehow still managed to question its authenticity, all these years later.

Of course, she had never expected to see him again either. . . Now, he acted around with such nonchalance towards their past, that she was beginning to wonder if she had only imagined the kiss, or if the memory was altered by time. Somehow she knew this was not the case. In any case, she certainly wasn't about to bring it up.

"What's the matter?"

Chris' thoughts snapped back to the present. "Oh, nothing. I was just thinking."

The two of them were in her house so that Chris could gather a few essentials for traveling and leave a note for her butler explaining that she would not be back for quite some time. Nash had insisted that they leave Vinay del Zexay that very night, although Chris didn't immediately see the reason for rushing.

"What were you thinking about? You looked a little upset," he commented rather nonchalantly.

"Nothing, really. Would you like some wine?" She asked in an attempt to draw his endeavors away from prodding into her thoughts.

"Thank you."

Success. "Red or white?"

". . .Red," he answered, although he looked darkly at the bottle of red wine that she held in her hand.

She poured the burgundy liquid into a glass and passed it to him. She briefly considered pouring herself a glass but decided against it; she'd already had quite a bit at the ball, and she needed to have her wits about her if she was going to be dealing with Nash.

She watched him curiously as he solemnly gazed into his glass as though he thought that drinking it would be against his better judgment. However, he finally took a sip of it and looked around the living room.

"Nice place you've got here."

"Thanks," she replied absently, and then sighed. "Nash, are you sure we have to leave tonight? I mean, I don't have to report back to the council for another week at least. There's really no point in sneaking off like a couple of fugitives. Why don't we get some rest tonight and start first thing tomorrow?"

"Nonsense! Where would be the romance in that? Don't you want to steal away into the starry night with your knight in shinning armor again?" he replied with exaggerated spiritedness.

Chris raised an eyebrow. "Romance? Hardly. Nash, we had to sneak out through a stuffy, dusty old passageway while being constantly attacked by starving monsters. Besides, the fact that you were there took every romantic element right out of it."

He sighed. "Chris, I shall never be in danger of having an oversized ego so long as you're around."

She was dying to say that if anyone's ego needed deflation, it was his. However, she managed to refrain so as to get back on topic. "I still say there is no need to go tonight."

"I say there is."

"Mind filling me in as to why then?"

However, before Nash could answer, there was a knock at the door. The two stood silent for a moment, staring at each other. Chris didn't know who would be coming by at this time of night, but Nash did not seem surprised.

Finally, Chris exited the living room to the hallway to answer the door.

It was Louis, looking mildly concerned and somewhat ashamed.

"Louis? What are you doing here?" Chris asked.

Louis bowed his head a little. "Forgive me, lady Chris. It's just, I saw you leave the ball early with someone and I was a little concerned."

"Why?"

Louis shifted his weight uncomfortably from foot to foot. "I didn't know who it was. I thought he could have been subtly attempting to kidnap you."

"Kidnap me? Louis, I'm captain of the Zexen Knights! I can look after myself! Besides, he is no stranger, not even to you Louis."

"But milady, I've never seen him before!"

"I'm deeply offended that you don't remember such a valiant member of the fire bringer, when you were a part of it too." Nash was leaning in the doorway between the living room and hallway, grinning mischievously at Louis, who looked at him blankly.

There was a long moment of silence as the two men stared at each other before the light of recognition crossed Louis' features.

"You're. . . You're that Harmonian, Nash!" he exclaimed finally. "It's been so long! After the fighting was all over, no one knew where you had gone. . . But. . . you haven't changed at all," he finished, his tone betraying his obvious bewilderment.

"I can't say the same for you," Nash replied. "What a formidable knight you have grown into! Hardly recognizable from the timid squire that was constantly underfoot of the 'mighty six'."

Louis blinked, and was about to reply, but Chris cleared her throat and stepped in-between the two men.

"Well Louis, as you can see, Nash is no criminal. There is nothing to worry about."

"But. . ." Louis seemed reluctant to leave, and a look of suspicion came over his face. "I don't mean to be rude, but what is he doing here?"

Chris fought a wave of panic. Louis was her most faithful and devoted knight, but he would not take kindly to the knowledge that she was about to run off to goodness-knows-where with this shady acquaintance. He had become a little like Borus that way, Chris mused.

"I was in the area. I decided I might as well drop by and do some catching up with Lady Chris," Nash lied easily.

Louis did not looked thoroughly convinced, but Chris began to usher him back out the door. "That's right. You'd better get back to the ball, or you will be missed by all the pretty young women who have been clinging to you all night."

The knight became slightly flustered by the comment, and so did not resist much when Chris, as subtly as she could, pushed him out of the house. "Well, as long as you say everything is okay. I will call on you first thing in the morning then?"

"First thing," Chris echoed in agreement. "Good night, Louis."

She closed the door.

Nash was still leaning in the doorway, smirking at her triumphantly. "And that," he said, referring to Louis' visit, "is why it would be best to leave tonight."

"How did you know he was going to give us trouble?" Chris asked.

"He followed us. I noticed him lurking about some distance behind us on the way over here." He answered with a shrug.

Chris stared at him and Nash grinned at her expectantly.

Finally she sighed and began to head up the stairs to her room. "Wait here while I get changed into something I can travel in. We leave tonight."

"I know." He grinned smugly and drained his glass of the remaining wine.

******

They traveled all through the night by foot in order to pass through Zexen territory more easily. About an hour before dawn, they reached Brass Castle, and slipped through without complication. As the sun rose, Nash seemed to travel much more slowly, but she didn't find this too strange, for she too, was starting to feel fatigued from having traveled all through the night.

They were well out of Zexen territory, in a wooded area when they agreed to rest for a bit before continuing on to the plains of the Grasslands. By now it was midday and they were both exhausted.

"Lucky thing we haven't run into too many monsters out here," Chris said, turning to her companion. "There'll probably be more on the plains though, which is why I don't relish the idea of resting out in the open fields. We should rest here while we still have the shelter of the trees."

"Agreed." Nash replied with a nod.

The two dropped their few traveling items by a tree and set up a temporary camp in the small clearing they had come to. They finally broke out the food they packed with them, which included a few small woodland creatures they had hunted down along the way.

He ate a lot.

Chris, who was still somewhat full from the banquet at the ball, ate very little, but Nash ate as though he hadn't tasted food in years. Chris stared at him with a mystified expression as he gorged himself on food.

The most curious thing though, was the fact that Nash hardly let anything cook before he devoured it. Chris left her meat over the camp's fire until it was thoroughly well done, but Nash might as well have eaten his raw for the difference it would have made.

"Nash, you're going to make yourself ill eating like that. . ." Chris finally said, feeling mildly nauseous by the extraordinarily bloody meat he was eating. "How can you eat your meat so rare? It looks disgusting."

". . . Call it an acquired taste," he answered with a sigh.

She didn't reply but continued to stare at him.

When he finally finished consuming the practically raw meat, he sighed, looking oddly unsatisfied. However, he looked up at Chris and grinned slightly.

"We should rest a bit longer before we move on," he said stretching a little, and she nodded.

Chris watched with growing curiosity as Nash removed the two swords that hung at his sides, laying them carefully on the ground next to where he sat. During the few enemy encounters they had since they had begun their journey yesterday, Nash had dealt with them using the projectile weapon on his arm, same as he had always done. Why then, did he have these two great swords?

She couldn't resist asking. "I meant to ask you earlier, but what exactly is with those two swords? Why do you carry them if you do not intend to fight with them?"

Nash joined her in staring at the two long sheathed swords before answering. "Grosser Fluss. I don't normally carry them with me anymore, and I only use them when I have to. "

"Why is that?"

Nash closed his eyes. "As you should know by now, great power rarely comes without a greater price. These swords are powerful enough to wipe out a nest of large dragons, but it is a power that is not easily controlled. When I unleash the power of Grosser Fluss, I no longer have accurate judgment of who is my enemy and who isn't. I simply destroy everything in sight."

Chris nodded, but was silent for a moment. Although she had technically known this Harmonian for over two decades, she had never known until a couple days ago that there was so much to him. She vaguely wondered how many other things Nash had never gotten around to telling her. She sat down in front of a tree across from him and tried unsuccessfully to get him to meet her eye.

"So you carry them now because you think you will be needing them?"

He opened his eyes but didn't look at her directly. "The one who is after the Moon Rune is not an ordinary human being. One must possess terrible power to destroy the oldest and strongest vampire that ever lived. Even if I find the rune before the murderer does, my mission is not complete until I've avenged Sierra, and Grosser Fluss is the only real power I have access to. . ."

"That's another thing I wanted to ask you about. . . If you do find the Moon Rune, What will you do?" Chris figured that he would simply look after the Rune where it was sealed and leave it without a host. After all, most people did not have the ability to obtain a True Rune. However, she really had no idea what his plans were if they were successful in finding it.

Nash finally met her gaze, although the usual humor in his features was absent. "I will protect it." The answer was simple, but his tone suggested that he did not wish to discuss it further.

"But-"

"But what?" he interrupted, continuing before she could respond. "Enough about me. Ever since we met up again yesterday it's been all about me, and you haven't told me a thing about what you've been up to these past twenty years. So out with it."

The tables turned, Chris found she wasn't sure what to say. "Well. . . uh. . . I don't know what to start with really. . ."

"Which one was it?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Which one of the knights did you end up hooking up with?" Nash was grinning again like his old self.

Chris couldn't stop her face from flushing slightly, and she averted her gaze. How did he know that she had been married?

"Ah-ha! So you *were* involved with one of them!" he pointed. "I was joking, but I see from your face that it was the truth. Now tell me, was it the short-tempered blonde fellow or the dark-haired one who called me a ruffian in Iksay?"

"You are referring to Borus and Percival." Chris mumbled.

"Right. They were both so head over heels for you, and understandably so," he chuckled. "So who was it?"

Chris' face became a deeper shade of crimson, but when she answered, her voice was thick with remorse. "For your information, Borus died almost fifteen years ago during a furious war in the South, the same one that also took the lives of Roland and Leo. . ."

Nash blinked. "I'm sorry," he replied genuinely. "And Percival?"

"He had resigned from his position as a knight, but rejoined after Borus' death," she answered, trying not to let her emotions constrict the tone of her voice. "And yes, I was involved with Percival for a time. We were married for nearly ten years."

Nash seemed genuinely surprised. "Married? Why didn't you settle down and have a family?"

Chris bit her lower lip. "We were too used to living as Zexen knights to change our lifestyle. Or at least, I was. I think he would have liked to settle down, but I was set in my ways and he never asked me to change. . ." Here she failed to keep the waver from her voice, and Nash's face instantly became more compassionate.

"I see. I think I understand. Did he die in the line of duty?"

Chris shook her head solemnly. "It was odd. He disappeared one day about five years ago. He simply left me a note one day saying that he was heading North for a while. I assumed he'd gone to Iksay for a while, and didn't worry too much. But he never came back. Although they never found his body, a strange woman visited me and brought me his sword. I was unreasonable with her. I was angry and demanded to know what happened. But when I drew my sword on her, she vanished. Despite the fact that she would not tell me what happened, she did confirm that . . .that he was. . . "

Nash nodded to signify that she didn't need to finish the sentence.

"I tried to find the woman, but. . . I never did. I didn't want to believe her, but I knew it was true. Only, it kills me not to know why or how. . ." She wasn't sure why she was telling Nash all of this, but it just came spilling out so easily, even though she was never able to talk about it with Salome or Louis.

They were silent for a minute, and Chris absently plucked an odd looking flower she saw beside her and examined it, trying to escape the awkward tension that suddenly seemed to rise between them. When she finally did looked up at him, he was gazing at her.

"I know what such loss feels like. . ." he said quietly. Another moment passed, and he seemed to be thinking. "Strange."

"What is?"

"It seems we both lost our spouse roughly five years ago. . ."

"O-Ouch!"

"What is it?!"

Chris' face flushed. "N-nothing, I just picked myself on this thorny flower. How clumsy of me," she replied, and opened her hand to reveal a drop of blood glistening on her palm.

"A-Ah. . . Could you please. . . Bandage that up or something?" Nash said, looking away.

Chris raised an eyebrow. "Since when have you been squeamish about blood?" It was really rather odd, she thought, being as he had just polished off the bloodiest steak she'd ever seen a man eat.

Nash hesitated. "I'm not squeamish! I just feel. . . 'weak' at the sight of it."

"Isn't that the same thing?"

"No." He then changed the topic. "I think we should take a short nap before we head out onto the plains," he said, looking considerably relieved when Chris wrapped her hand in a cloth, hiding the wound from view."

She nodded. "Good idea. We'll set out again at nightfall."

Chris lay in the shade of a tree not too far off and waited for sleep to claim her. Nash stay seated for a moment by the small fire they had made for cooking and gazed at Chris with a growing feeling of regret. There was seemed to be so much space between them somehow.

And yet, just as Chris had the evening before, he couldn't help but remember the night they said goodbye twenty years ago, and be overtaken by emotions stirred by the memory of their one bittersweet kiss.

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A/N: Just so you know, I am one of the many unfortunate people who have not played Suikogaiden. Because of this, I might not have all the details of Nash's swords down. I've researched it though. Also, I'm still playing through Suikoden II, so if this results in some kind of plot hole, you have my sincere apologies.

Thanks again for reading, feel free to keep sending reviews! ^_^

Next Chapter: 'Pride'