~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The soft hand of Molly Weasley was the first thing to disturb Remus' sleep. She lightly shook his shoulder as he arose from slumber.
"Remus, everyone is coming in for breakfast."
"What?" he responded groggily. He wasn't completely sure where he was.
"It's morning. The others are coming for breakfast..." Just as she said this the door opened and in strode Mundungus Fletcher.
He looked a little frazzled, but beyond that he seemed to be in a cheery mood. However, when he saw Remus sitting at the table he stopped dead and the grin faded from his face in a split second. He fumbled with his finger and started muttering, "Erm...morning, Remus! How are...er...have a nice...ahem...lovely weather, eh?" Remus stared blankly at Mundungus as he sat down opposite him and decided to change the subject.
"What's for eating, Molly? Smells wonderful, that does!" Mundungus called to Molly in a jovial manner.
Molly was bustling around the kitchen preparing the rest of the meal, pointing her wand at various things and sending them flying across the room. "Oh, well let's see...we have bacon, ham, pancakes, eggs—"
"I'll just have a little bit of everything," declared Mundungus with his pointer finger in the air.
Remus was looking around the kitchen, still a little disoriented. He watched Molly as she brought Mundungus' food to him. He thought he saw her eyes flit to his face for a fraction of a second before looking back at the plate of food she was setting on the table. He glanced at Mundungus, who he realized had been watching him. Molly elbowed him in the ribs, and with a growl of pain he quickly looked away. They were staring at him, and Remus knew why. Of course, they were all trying to see how he was coping. It was stupid of them...both of them. What did they expect? Did they expect him to break out in a big grin and declare how wonderful life was? Naïve. They were both naïve, and he felt like shouting it at them.
The kitchen door opened again and Kingsley Shacklebolt strode in. He approached things differently. He walked straight up to Remus, sat down next to him, and asked in a comforting tone of voice, "How are you, Remus?"
Remus was taken off guard by this question. He had expected to be avoided all morning, not approached like this. He stammered out an answer, "Well...I guess about as good...as I can be."
Kingsley nodded approvingly. Remus was almost glad he wasn't being avoided. It was nice to have someone to talk to. Even if he was only asking how he was, it was still a comfort. He didn't feel as bad as he had last night. Sirius' death had sunken in completely now, and he had stopped thinking he was going to stride through the door. He figured this was a good thing. As much as he wanted Sirius to come back, denial wasn't healthy. He'd seen many witches and wizards slowly slip away from realty because they were in denial.
The door opened again and Alastor Moody, or more commonly known as
"Mad-Eye" Moody, limped in. He wrinkled his nose and sniffed the air. "Smells good," he declared. He limped over to the table, his fake eye swiveling about in his head and finally resting on Remus. He sat down next to Kingsley.
"You alright, Lupin?" he asked in what almost sounded like a concerned tone.
"Er...ahem..."
"Don't worry about it. I understand."
Remus opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind. He ran his fingers through his hair and stood up from the table. He began to walk towards the door, but hadn't even made it before it opened again. A number of people entered this time. There was Elphias Doge, Arthur Weasley, Dedalus Diggle, Emmeline Vance, Hestia Jones, Charlie and Bill Weasley, and at the back was Albus Dumbledore.
"Remus. Where are you going?" questioned Dumbledore. "Sit down, sit down."
Taken aback, Remus turned around and sat back in his chair. Dumbledore sat down next to Mundungus as the others sat down around the table. Remus looked around the room and noticed almost everyone was looking at him. He looked at Dumbledore, who was also staring at him, but seemed to be really looking inside of him. The usual twinkle in his eyes was gone. Once everyone was seated, Dumbledore stood up and addressed everyone.
"Last night, the Order had its first encounter with Voldemorte (many people winced) in fifteen years. As you all know, I'm sure, we lost one of the Order, someone very dear to us." He looked at Remus, who was staring at Dumbledore, almost pleading him not to go there.
It seems that sometimes feelings never bore to the surface until they are driven there. That was precisely what Dumbledore was trying to do, and Remus would give anything for Dumbledore not to do it.
"Sirius Black was lost last night. He died, yes, but some will find that he is not truly dead. One can never be truly dead unless they are forgotten, and I don't believe Sirius will ever be forgotten. Do you?"
Dumbledore was staring straight at Remus, and it was apparent he was asking him the question. He fumbled around in his brain. It was telling him to answer the question.
Say "no", he thought.
But no words came out. Instead a choking noise came from his throat. He was holding back tears again. He didn't want to cry in front of everyone. That would be stupid. Men don't cry (at least, not in front of others). Just when he thought he could stand the silence no longer, Mundungus stood up and said loudly, "No, we won't." He patted Remus on the shoulder, then sat back down. Suddenly there was a barrage of people saying the same thing and patting Remus on the back. They were all answering for him. They knew he would never forget, and just because he couldn't talk about it didn't mean he didn't want to. Remus was incredibly grateful for all his fellow Order members. They had almost all experienced some sort of loss like his. They understood. Then Remus understood. Dumbledore hadn't asked that question to put pressure on Remus, but to let him know how many stood with him. It was overwhelming.
The soft hand of Molly Weasley was the first thing to disturb Remus' sleep. She lightly shook his shoulder as he arose from slumber.
"Remus, everyone is coming in for breakfast."
"What?" he responded groggily. He wasn't completely sure where he was.
"It's morning. The others are coming for breakfast..." Just as she said this the door opened and in strode Mundungus Fletcher.
He looked a little frazzled, but beyond that he seemed to be in a cheery mood. However, when he saw Remus sitting at the table he stopped dead and the grin faded from his face in a split second. He fumbled with his finger and started muttering, "Erm...morning, Remus! How are...er...have a nice...ahem...lovely weather, eh?" Remus stared blankly at Mundungus as he sat down opposite him and decided to change the subject.
"What's for eating, Molly? Smells wonderful, that does!" Mundungus called to Molly in a jovial manner.
Molly was bustling around the kitchen preparing the rest of the meal, pointing her wand at various things and sending them flying across the room. "Oh, well let's see...we have bacon, ham, pancakes, eggs—"
"I'll just have a little bit of everything," declared Mundungus with his pointer finger in the air.
Remus was looking around the kitchen, still a little disoriented. He watched Molly as she brought Mundungus' food to him. He thought he saw her eyes flit to his face for a fraction of a second before looking back at the plate of food she was setting on the table. He glanced at Mundungus, who he realized had been watching him. Molly elbowed him in the ribs, and with a growl of pain he quickly looked away. They were staring at him, and Remus knew why. Of course, they were all trying to see how he was coping. It was stupid of them...both of them. What did they expect? Did they expect him to break out in a big grin and declare how wonderful life was? Naïve. They were both naïve, and he felt like shouting it at them.
The kitchen door opened again and Kingsley Shacklebolt strode in. He approached things differently. He walked straight up to Remus, sat down next to him, and asked in a comforting tone of voice, "How are you, Remus?"
Remus was taken off guard by this question. He had expected to be avoided all morning, not approached like this. He stammered out an answer, "Well...I guess about as good...as I can be."
Kingsley nodded approvingly. Remus was almost glad he wasn't being avoided. It was nice to have someone to talk to. Even if he was only asking how he was, it was still a comfort. He didn't feel as bad as he had last night. Sirius' death had sunken in completely now, and he had stopped thinking he was going to stride through the door. He figured this was a good thing. As much as he wanted Sirius to come back, denial wasn't healthy. He'd seen many witches and wizards slowly slip away from realty because they were in denial.
The door opened again and Alastor Moody, or more commonly known as
"Mad-Eye" Moody, limped in. He wrinkled his nose and sniffed the air. "Smells good," he declared. He limped over to the table, his fake eye swiveling about in his head and finally resting on Remus. He sat down next to Kingsley.
"You alright, Lupin?" he asked in what almost sounded like a concerned tone.
"Er...ahem..."
"Don't worry about it. I understand."
Remus opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind. He ran his fingers through his hair and stood up from the table. He began to walk towards the door, but hadn't even made it before it opened again. A number of people entered this time. There was Elphias Doge, Arthur Weasley, Dedalus Diggle, Emmeline Vance, Hestia Jones, Charlie and Bill Weasley, and at the back was Albus Dumbledore.
"Remus. Where are you going?" questioned Dumbledore. "Sit down, sit down."
Taken aback, Remus turned around and sat back in his chair. Dumbledore sat down next to Mundungus as the others sat down around the table. Remus looked around the room and noticed almost everyone was looking at him. He looked at Dumbledore, who was also staring at him, but seemed to be really looking inside of him. The usual twinkle in his eyes was gone. Once everyone was seated, Dumbledore stood up and addressed everyone.
"Last night, the Order had its first encounter with Voldemorte (many people winced) in fifteen years. As you all know, I'm sure, we lost one of the Order, someone very dear to us." He looked at Remus, who was staring at Dumbledore, almost pleading him not to go there.
It seems that sometimes feelings never bore to the surface until they are driven there. That was precisely what Dumbledore was trying to do, and Remus would give anything for Dumbledore not to do it.
"Sirius Black was lost last night. He died, yes, but some will find that he is not truly dead. One can never be truly dead unless they are forgotten, and I don't believe Sirius will ever be forgotten. Do you?"
Dumbledore was staring straight at Remus, and it was apparent he was asking him the question. He fumbled around in his brain. It was telling him to answer the question.
Say "no", he thought.
But no words came out. Instead a choking noise came from his throat. He was holding back tears again. He didn't want to cry in front of everyone. That would be stupid. Men don't cry (at least, not in front of others). Just when he thought he could stand the silence no longer, Mundungus stood up and said loudly, "No, we won't." He patted Remus on the shoulder, then sat back down. Suddenly there was a barrage of people saying the same thing and patting Remus on the back. They were all answering for him. They knew he would never forget, and just because he couldn't talk about it didn't mean he didn't want to. Remus was incredibly grateful for all his fellow Order members. They had almost all experienced some sort of loss like his. They understood. Then Remus understood. Dumbledore hadn't asked that question to put pressure on Remus, but to let him know how many stood with him. It was overwhelming.
