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The Land Office—Property Claim—The Sheriff—

The Parkersons' Brawl

Their faces, I reckon, I'll never forget.  It would be a right knee-slappin' sight if we hadn't known they woulda taken the strips of slashed beddin' and made nooses for both our necks if they knew who we was.  Lucky for us, the chinaman's luck held, as all four were clearly drunk.  Huck later said he'd wondered how they stayed on their feet, on account of his Pap always laid down when he looked that drunk.  They all kinda staggered into the room, at first only lookin' at the feathers scattered ev'ry which way and broken bedsteads.  Then Jeb noticed us.  I put on my best shocked-innocence look as he looked at us.

"What're you two rice-pickers doin' here?" he said, "Did you two do this?  If you did, it won't just be your jobs that you loose!" 

He was getting scarily angry.  Huck always came up with the better lies, so he said, "No sir, no cause this!  We come, we clean, but we no can clean this".

I inwardly smiled at Huck's quick study of the chink's way of talken.  It felt odd, being the one called a chink.  I started thinkin' maybe Sam didn't like bein' called it either, but couldn't think about it too long, on account of Jeb's fast grab of my gown. He shoved me against the wall and said, "You better not move, as my brothers and me are goin' to go talk to the boss. You ain't gonner have no job no more, if yer lucky. You just hope you get off easy." He gave me a final glare and stalked out drunkenly, followed by his brothers.  I looked at Huck, and saw in his eyes the same thing I was feeling and we both cleared outta there, usin' the tree.  We didn't never slash up their packs, though lookin' back, I think we did enough. We quick took off the robes and hats, stuffing them outta sight and grabbing the land slip, running to the land office, prayin' it were open.

When we reached the building where the land office wars, we found it was open, even this late. The building doubled as the sheriff's office, and I reckon he never closes, either he or a deputy's always there. We walked over to the land claim part of the building and talked to the clerk, an old grandfatherly lookin' man, about gettin' our claim properly made.

"We've been settin' out there goin' on six months, havin' a chink hold it for us while we came out here," said I, 'memberin' that Sam done told us he'd been settin' the claim six months, "and we'd like it now registered to us two.  He got the slip, but no name on it, as we's goin' to own it".

"Well, that's fair, as he gave it to you, though he could claim it hisself, that's a right decent chink you got yourselves out there" said the man, while filling out the proper form, "Your names?"

Huck and I looked at each other.  We usually would have just used made up names, but for this, it was different.

"Huckleberry Finn," said Huck, surprising me, that he used his real name.  He looked at me, seemin' to say that he was tired of lying and wanted  to be straight and honest.

I agreed with him, but also thought of Sam, how disappointed he'd be that he didn't own it.

"Tom Sawyer," said I, "Later we'd like to add on our chinaman as another owner."  The clerk looked up at us, with his eyebrows raised.

"Well," said he, "If you want to, though I wouldn't trust no panface to not just kill you two and claim all of it himself."

"Well, he's set our claim six months," said Huck, "And you said yourself he coulda claimed it hisself. If he cared for it six months, I reckon we can trust him."

I felt right inwardly, thinking of how happy Sam would be when he could have his name down as a co-owner of our plot.  The clerk signed it and handed it back to us.  We mentioned there were some new ditchpigs who'd come and given our chink a hard time and us too, not believin' the claim were ours.  The sheriff, named Clemens, then took notice of us and came over, saying, "Newcomers, eh?  Well, I think I'll head out with you to your claim just in case you get any more trouble tonight."

Huck and me were right grateful to him, and I began to think Huck was right about sheriffs, despite what Robin Hood had to say about the sheriff he knew.  So Sheriff Clemens headed out to our claim with us, bringing along his tent and other odd 'n' ends.  We got to our claim to see Sam boundin' towards us, all smiles.

"Me no think you lofans come back to Sam," he says, "You get land?" 

We told him the good news and he was right pleased, shouting to almighty heav'n.  He was doin' his Kung Fu in happiness.  Sheriff Clemens gave us a look saying he agreed with my first thoughts, that the man belonged in a' asylum.  Huck and me just grinned, knowin' Sam was thinkin' of nothing but his wife and son.

Well, soon the next day, the Parkersons got into trouble, all four killin' I reckon about 10 men in a brawl in a bar, after their bad night sleepin' outside 'cause o' our work.  They got into a fight 'bout some bar maid that Jeb got an eye for, and the girl's man didn't like Jeb's eye bein' on her. He and his friends got goin' at Jeb and Jeb's brothers jumped in.  Huck said he heard it were a right dog fight, but in the end all four was hung and that were the last of them.  I didn't like goin' to town much, as I liked Sam a heap lot more than any other father I'd ever got.  He always called me his good boy. I eventually learned to write his real name, though every time I'd try to say it, he'd bust out laughing, so I'd just always call him Sam.