All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream. Edgar Allen Poe - Dream within a Dream
CHAPTER FOUR - CONNOR December 2004
I was exhausted. I hadn't slept well crammed against the wall on Dawn's too- thin, too narrow dorm room bed. Dawn was still asleep on her side, curled alongside me. She didn't like to stay in the TKE house and I could understand that. Paloma was already gone for the holidays, her finals over two days before Dawn and mine, so I could stay the night without making anyone uncomfortable.
I kissed Dawn's shoulder and tried to wiggle out from behind her without waking her up. I needed to sneak to the restroom before someone caught me. Guys weren't allowed to use it and the rest room for us was in a locked part of the dorm as we weren't allowed in until eight in the morning. Like that stopped anyone. By the time I got back, Dawn was awake. She smiled at me.
"You look so cute," she said.
"What? With my hair a mess, no make up and rumpled clothes?" I grinned at her, primping my hair. It needed a trim.
"Now you're mocking me." She gave me that fake mad-face of hers that was so adorable.
"Just a little," I admitted, leaning down and kissing her. "So what do you want to do now that you survived your very first round of college finals?"
"Stay in bed for a week," she said, stretching wonderfully.
I smirked. "That can be arranged."
She winged the pillow at me. "You're such a guy." Dawn rolled out of bed and fetched her bucket of shampoo and soap and whatever else from her wardrobe. "First I want a shower then we can make a plan."
"Okay."
While she was gone I pulled the covers up messily. If I wanted to be really sweet, I could have changed the sheets and started the wash, but I hadn't totally ruled out a little more between the sheets play time though the showering now made such things unlikely. Still, no sense in taking the option off the books. I stretched out on the bed and turned on the tv. Her dorm might have some silly rules but at least it had cable. I turned on CMT and chilled out to Martina McBride's latest video. She had such beautiful eyes.
I felt even more exhausted than I first thought. Between pre-Law and forensics, my brain was leaking out my ears. I figured it this way, if I somehow didn't get into law school, I could work in forensic science. I had a fascination with forensics, death and serial killers. There was something oddly compelling about it all and I loved working puzzles.
Still, even Martina couldn't keep me awake and I faded out. One moment I was watching the video and the next Dawn was tickling my face with the end of her braid. She smiled down at me.
"Tired you out?" She seemed very pleased at that.
"I'm not complaining about it." I sat up, trying to smooth my wrinkled clothing without much luck. I needed to head home for a shower and some fresh clothes. "Any thoughts about what you want to do?"
"Well, Buffy will be here in a week so I have time to prepare for that. I was thinking we ought to hit that new club you were talking about." Dawn sat next to me.
"Over a hundred imported beers. Sid and I have been having fun there. Sidney's the one who turned me on to it," I said. Sidney went TKE the same time I did. He was probably my best friend, though sometimes he had a knack for getting me in trouble.
"And good music, right." She gave me a look, stabbing a finger at the tv.
"Country music is good music," I protested but I couldn't really convince her of that. "But the Around Midnight is mostly jazz and blues. You'll like it." Or at least I hoped so. I didn't know if Dawn liked that sort of music but she didn't seem unhappy at the announcement it was a jazz hole.
"Good."
"I bet you're excited to see your sister," I said. Dawn didn't talk about her family much. I knew her mother had passed away and her father was never around. It made me feel sad. I wouldn't know what I'd do without my family. She had told me Buffy lived in Cleveland which was sort of a shame. I could see Dawn missed her. That's why I was hoping she'd get into Alpha Sigma Tau. She'd have a nice second family here.
Dawn smiled. "I can't wait." She leaned over and kissed my cheek. "You are so good to stay around to meet her. I know she's excited to meet you."
"Mom and Dad were cool about it. I'll just fly up to Aspen by myself and meet them there." I shrugged. Dawn looked a little disappointed or something with that. I try not to act like I have money but sometimes it's hard. I never even think about it much but I do have it better than a lot of kids, Dawn included. My parents gave me everything I've ever wanted. I had a 1966 convertible Mustang because Dad knew how much I liked muscle and pony cars. Hunter green, tan seats, it was too much of a car for a kid but I had wanted it so I got it. Dad's law firm made good money and he was more than willing to indulge me and my sisters.
"I'm not getting out of L.A. but it'll be great to have Buffy here. She's bringing Faith."
"Are she and Buffy...lovers?" I honestly didn't know much about Buffy, not even what she did for a living in Cleveland. I probably ought to ask but Dawn was never forthcoming with a lot of details about her life. I was torn between liking the mystery and being annoyed, like she didn't really trust me even though we were sleeping together. Of course I hadn't told her Dad was the lawyer you see every other commercial set, at least not right away. I didn't like people to know how much money Dad has and I'd been burned before by people who wanted me for my money. Tracy sprang to mind
Dawn blushed a bit. "No. Buffy likes guys. Faith...well, if it has two legs and is still breathing she'd probably sleep with it. Maybe even if it weren't breathing." Dawn added that last under her breath but I heard her. I have great senses. I try hard to pretend I don't. She leveled her eyes at me. "You'd be safer to keep away from her. She'd break you."
I didn't even have to fake the wounded look. "That hurts."
"Trust me. Faith is sort of bad news." There was something hidden behind Dawn's eyes but I couldn't ferret it out as she paused, considering her next words. "But she's like part of the family now."
"I'm looking forward to meeting them all. So, tonight at the Around Midnight?" I asked.
She nodded. "Want me to meet you at the house?"
"Sure." I moved in for a kiss.
She kissed me quick then put a hand against my chest, pushing gently. "You can probably sneak out now or do you want to catch some more sleep here?"
"Can think of a few other alternatives." I kissed her again, my tongue slipping into her mouth. She tasted like mint. She kissed me back but when I tried to push her into the mattress, she stopped me.
"Uh-uh buddy, I'm clean."
"I knew I should have stolen the body wash." I grinned at her and she shoved me. I had known I wasn't going to get lucky this morning but no harm in trying. I got up. "I should probably get home and make sure Sidney hasn't trashed my room."
Dawn looked perturbed. I knew she liked Sid but sometimes lost patience with the hot water he got me in. "Why would he trash your room? He has one of his own."
I shrugged. "If he trashed his, he'd have to clean it up."
"Men." She looked appropriately disgusted at us.
I just laughed and let myself out.
*
*
*
Dawn kept fussing with her hair as I drove. Okay, I should have put the top up, but I didn't get a convertible to drive around with the top up on a beautiful night like this. She could have braided her hair or something.
I hoped Dawn would like this place. The Around Midnight wasn't the usual hang out with techno music so loud it could pulverize your brain and dance floors so packed it kept us from showing how bad we actually danced. I didn't mind those places. I enjoyed them but every so often I wanted something a little different, quieter.
Sidney and I had been coming here since it opened. It wouldn't stay open long if they got caught serving minors but I had gotten us and Dawn the best fake id's; Dad's money at work. I'd never brought Dawn because I wasn't sure how she'd react to this part of my life since this is where the wanna-be coven met and talked magic to the sounds of blues and jazz. I wasn't ready to tell Dawn I believed in magic. It sounded too damn flaky.
I wasn't sure how interested I was in what Sidney was getting me into. I hadn't really been raised in any faith. We were Protestant in name only. The church going was a Christmas-Easter thing, just so Dad could be seen, good for business. I had nothing against this Wiccan stuff. Sidney was nuts for it. I felt a little weird studying to be a mage. I hadn't believed in magic at first. I did now. I had done some wild stuff and there was an incredible lure, a power to be tapped into.
I knew the importance of that. But I didn't trust our mentor, Amy. There was something off about her. She seemed more motivated by money than teaching us. She kept hinting if we wanted to go to the next level, there would be costs and they all seemed to be monetary. Then there was this geeky dumbass who was Amy's right hand man.I have no tolerance for idiots. Andrew might be smarter than I thought but he was so obsequious you couldn't tell. I couldn't tolerate Andrew. I wasn't sure why Amy did. She seemed smarter than that but they both came from the same town. I didn't know where exactly and I didn't like that bit of mystery either.
Dawn ran her hand up my thigh. "Penny for your thoughts."
"I'm thinking if you don't move your hand I'm going to wrap the 'Stang around a pole," I said so she moved her hand faster. "For the love of God, Dawn."
She laughed, taking her hand off me. "You looked so serious there for a moment."
"Just thinking." "Finals are over, baby. You don't have to do that any more." She smiled at me.
Dawn didn't like dummies any more than I did or at least I didn't think so. Most days it felt like me and Dawn had known each other all our lives instead of just under two months. It was one of the reasons I had my special gift for her with me tonight. I hadn't taken her home to meet the folks yet but I would have if the opportunity had come up. I'd met Xander, Gunn, Fred and Wesley. They were nice enough. Fred and Wes were among the smartest people I'd ever met. Gunn was clever. And while Xander was obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed, he was a nice guy. How many people would be willing to put up a friend's sister just so she could stay in California to finish high school? I was a little suspicious at first, older guy, teen-aged girl but that was just my morbid imagination and too many sex crimes texts digested for class. Xander and I traded anime and played D&D. I liked him.
"I'll take a night off from thinking, I promise," I said.
"A few beers will surely help," she replied as I pulled into the lot.
"Thanks." I reached over and tried to take a snarl out of her hair. I guess I shouldn't have been a jerk about the convertible top.
She pulled me close, kissing me. Her tongue probed the inside of my mouth. I gently pulled away, feeling stirrings below the belt that would just get me in trouble at the moment.
"All we need to do is get caught parking a few days before your sister gets here. She'll kill me."
Dawn's Cheshire grin made the boys tighten; she was too amused by my impending death. "Without a doubt."
We went inside. Sidney already had a table in the corner with a good view of the stage. I was glad he had since the bar was crowed. Totally Consumed was playing tonight and that blues band was simply on fire.
"Hey Sidney," Dawn said, sitting down.
"Hey guys, thought you got lost." Sidney's dark eyes danced as he smirked at me. "Or did you have to find a crowbar to get Connor off of you?"
"Crowbar," she said perkily.
"So I'm back in the dating pool I see," I said and she slapped me as I sat down.
"So what do you want?" Sidney wiggled his pint glass. "I've got Tetley's."
"They make more than tea?" Dawn inquired.
"Good ale," Sidney assured her.
"I'm going to try this Skullsplitter ale, sounds like fun." I loved experimenting with beers. This one was from the Orkneys. "How about you Dawn?" I asked.
She made a face. "I'm not the beer connoisseur you two are. Can I get something else?"
"Whatever you want," I said and Dawn selected a drink of Bailey's Irish Cream and Butterscotch Schnapps. She gave me a guilty look because the drink cost over five dollars. I wish she wouldn't worry about money so much. I know why she does. She only has that little job as a file clerk with Wolfram and Hart that doesn't pay much. I just wished she'd believe me when I tell her I like spending money on her.
"Sidney, where'd you get that ring?" Dawn asked as Totally Consumed started their gig.
Sidney fingered the ring on his middle finger, silver against the dark chocolate of his skin. It was a pentagram worked into knotwork to the point of being almost abstract. "I got it at Merlin's Dream. Do you like it?"
"It's nice." Dawn gave him a wary look. "I didn't know you were into new age stuff."
Sidney beamed. "I'm studying magic. My grandmother was a mambo in Louisiana but my dad hates all that stuff. I think he thinks it makes us look poor or ignorant. I think it's a good way to keep in touch with the world."
"I've heard that. I've known a few Wiccans." Dawn stabbed the ice in her drink, agitated. Her voice was oddly flat.
I could see Dawn was massively uncomfortable with the subject. God, Sidney don't tell her I'm going to those meetings with you. I'd have to talk to Dawn about this privately and see why it sort of made her nervous. If she wanted me to quit, I would.
"Cool," Sidney said. "Maybe you'd like to come to a meeting some time."
Dawn shook her head. "Thanks but it's not...you know, maybe after the holidays I will."
That surprised me. There was a strange glint in her eyes. Never let it be said I actually understood women.
"So what did you think of Connor's surprise?" Sidney asked and I could have killed him.
"What surprise?" Dawn looked up from her drink.
"Sidney," I hissed.
"What? Man, haven't you given it to her yet?" Sidney ran a hand over his shaved head. Now that I thought about it, he sort of looked like Gunn. "Damn Connor, it was all you could talk about. I thought you'd have given it to her by now. Or were you too busy showing her that twig of yours again? She's probably seen enough of that."
Dawn nearly choked on her drink and I gave Sidney the finger, feeling my cheeks burning. "I was going to wait until tonight when we were alone," I said.
"I'm not sure I can wait." Dawn was practically bouncing in her seat.
"I"m sure you can't." I glared at my friend. "Thanks Sid."
"Sorry." He sounded anything but. He was smiling so big the corners of his mouth could meet at the back of his head.
I dug into my pants pocket and took out the ring box. I opened it, seeing how bright Dawn's eyes had gotten. "This is my Irish side showing through," I said. My mouth suddenly felt dry and my hands shook. I tried to hide it by picking up my beer, taking a nervous sip. "It's based on Richard Joyce's wife's wedding ring or so the story goes. Wear it with the heart out and you're searching for love but if you wear it heart in, you've found it." God, that really sounds silly but it was a beautiful ring, at least to me. The heart was Connemara marble and the crown was set with sparkling tiny opals on a silver band. Dawn's expression wasn't quite what I hoped for. It was a mix of wonder and horror.
"Is something wrong?" I shouldn't even ask. I didn't want to know. Maybe I had jumped the gun. Maybe Dawn wasn't ready to commit.
"--nothing. It's beautiful." Dawn took the ring out of the box, her hand shaking so much she nearly dropped it. "I don't know what to say."
"Tell him you'll wear it. I'm not ready to have him crying on my shoulder all night," Sidney said, leaning back, loose-limbed, in his chair.
I gave him the evil eye. "You like it?"
"I love it. I was just thinking...Buffy got a Claddagh from a boyfriend once...." Dawn trailed off.
"And it didn't go good," I guessed.
"Understatement of the year. But that was Buffy and the bad things there, well, they aren't things we'll ever have to worry about." Dawn slid the ring onto her slim finger.
I took her hand, rubbing the ring with my thumb. My hand was still trembling. She leaned into me, kissing me. She tasted spicy and sweet, butterscotchy.
"Oh, get a room you two," Sidney said, waving down the waitress.
I was thinking the back of my car but even as thin as we both were, we'd be too cramped in the Mustang. I broke the kiss when the less-than-sensitive waitress asked me if I wanted a refill. "Make it a Guinness this time and another Smooth Sax for her," I replied.
Dawn smiled, putting her hand on my thigh again. Sequoia was taking notice. That was the last thing I needed here. Down boy. The waitress came back quickly with the drinks as Totally Consumed kicked out some scorching riffs.
"The ring was a Christmas gift but he couldn't wait so he had to run out and get you another gift for under the tree," Sidney said.
"Sidney," I moaned. Can't a man have secrets?
"I didn't think he'd make it through finals without exploding, he was so up about that ring," Sidney was just putting the screws to me at this point.
"Connor, the ring was more than enough. You didn't need to get me a second gift. My gift is going to look sad by comparison," Dawn said, genuinely looking distressed about that.
"It doesn't matter, Dawnie. He's a guy. Just give some attention to Fat Freddy and that's gift enough," Sidney said and I kicked him under the table.
Dawn's eyebrows arched. "Fat Freddy?"
"I do not call it that." I could feel myself blushing. I learned quickly you can't hide behind a pint glass.
"Do you want to know what he does call it?" Sidney leaned on the table, grinning.
"Is that what you boys do? Sit around the frat house, drinking and naming your penises?" Dawn gave us a disgusted looked.
"Well, yeah," Sidney said.
I just rolled my eyes. If he tells her about the dick measuring contests, I'll kill him. I took a gulp of my Guinness then scowled. There was a man at the bar whom I had seen hanging around some of the other college bars and even our parties at the house. He was odd, youngish but not so young as to fit into the frat house scene. He had scary eyes. He was always watching me. Sometimes he was really good at it and only luck let me catch a glimpse of him. He always looked the same, silly spiky brown hair and black leather like he was taking a shot at fashion and missed. It was getting really creepy, seeing him turn up time and again. He was a lot bolder tonight, openly staring at me.
"I've had enough of this guy," I said.
"What?" Dawn looked around, trying to see what I did.
I pointed with my pint glass to the guy. "I've see him hanging around the college. He's always staring at me."
"A perv?" Sidney craned his neck.
"Probably. I'm getting tired of him checking me out," I said with a shiver. I didn't have problems with homosexuals but I didn't want some older dude fantasizing about me.
"He's not a pervert," Dawn said, irritation etching into her face. I could tell it was for this weird guy. "That's Angel."
"You know him?" I was surprised.
"For years. He's a friend and if you saw him around the school he was probably looking for me. Or more likely looking out for me and telling Buffy whatever he sees." Dawn scowled, getting up.
She went over to the guy and started talking to him. She didn't look too happy and neither did he but he never did from what I've seen.
"I'd better go over there," I said. I didn't trust Dawn with this guy. He had the air of a predator. Maybe that was a semester of studying serial killers talking but I couldn't help it. The guy's eyes were dead looking.
"She might not want you riding to the rescue," Sidney said, not looking like he wanted to get up. "She said he was a friend."
"Well, if he's a friend, I should meet him." I had to know more about this guy. It's not that I didn't trust Dawn's judgment but some guys seemed utterly charming and were monsters underneath it all. I wandered over and they both looked at me like I was intruding. "Everything okay, Dawn?"
"It will be if Angel quits spying on me." Dawn crossed her arms.
The man looked indignant. "I'm not spying. I'm here on business, seriously," he insisted and Dawn didn't look mollified. I think she was ready to hit him and I think he knew it too because his face softened as he added, "You really need to leave, Dawn."
"Why?" I asked.
Dawn put her hand on my chest. I pulled her against me protectively. "It's okay, Connor. Angel's a private investigator." "So why do we have to leave?" I persisted.
"Dawn knows why," Angel said. He was looking at me funny. It was making me even more nervous.
"Angel deals with some real bad guys. If he says we might want to come back another night, that's exactly what we want to do," Dawn said. "Angel, this is my boyfriend, Connor."
Angel looked at me even more strangely. He didn't extend a hand to me and I didn't offer either. "Nice to finally meet you, Connor. Dawn's told me a lot about you."
"You would have met at Christmas," Dawn said, sounding nervous. "But maybe now's better. Angel is the head of Angel Investigations, part of Wolfram and Hart's law firm. He's sort of Xander, Gunn, Wes and Fred's boss."
"I see." This man didn't seem like a boss. I'm not sure what he looked like, a thug maybe. Dad had investigators that worked for his firm, too, so that part sounded kosher. Angel just didn't come off like an investigator to me. He seemed too intent on me and not paying enough attention to anything else. It made me really nervous.
"I'm sure we'll get to talk at the holiday party," Angel said.
"You will," Dawn said, putting her hand on my chest, trying to turn me around.
Angel's eyes flashed to the Claddagh and he took her hand. He looked at us both so sadly that I had to wonder why. It seemed like such an out of place emotion on that big blocky face of his. "It's beautiful, Dawn."
She beamed, squeezing his hand. "Connor just gave it to me."
His eyes pinned me and I was right back to feeling terribly uncomfortable. "You have good taste. Dawn, you'd better go."
She nodded. "Come on, Connor. When he tells you that, you know things are gonna get ugly. We should get Sidney out of here, too."
I let her lead me back to the table. I tried to keep my eye on Angel. His never left me and Dawn. I'd have to ask her his last name. I wonder if my Dad knew anything about him or Wolfram and Hart. I knew Dad admired Wolfram and Hart in the abstract. Totally different kind of law than what he practiced or the kind I wanted to pracitce someday.
"Sidney, we're heading out," I said, waving him up.
"What? Why? The night's...oh, god. Stick some ice down your pants."
"Not funny. Why don't you come with us? We can catch a late movie or something," I said, taking Dawn at her word about things getting dangerous. I could see she was worried.
"Is something up?" Sidney asked, looking alert now.
"We just want to do something a little different," Dawn said.
"Okay." Sidney followed us outside. "Tell you what, I'll call it an early night. You two go have fun."
I smiled at him gratefully. "Thanks, bud."
We got back in my Mustang and I waited until we were out on the road before asking, "Do you trust this Angel character, Dawn?"
"Yeah. He's a good guy most of the time. He and Buffy used to be...well, he was the one who gave her the Claddagh. It might not have worked out but they're still friends, sort of. Angel wants what's best for me, believe me," Dawn said. "He wouldn't hurt me or let anyone else hurt me.
She was holding something back. I could tell but I wasn't going to press her on it. "So, do you really want to go see a late night movie?"
She shook her head. "Let's go back to your place this time. The room is a little bigger." She smiled at me.
"Great."
And it was. Dawn usually didn't want to stay the night at the frat house but things were different now. I could feel it. We had taken the next step. Too bad that Angel guy had ruined the night for us. But it didn't matter. The really important stuff had turned out okay. I just wish I could shake the uneasy feeling I had about Angel.
Is but a dream within a dream. Edgar Allen Poe - Dream within a Dream
CHAPTER FOUR - CONNOR December 2004
I was exhausted. I hadn't slept well crammed against the wall on Dawn's too- thin, too narrow dorm room bed. Dawn was still asleep on her side, curled alongside me. She didn't like to stay in the TKE house and I could understand that. Paloma was already gone for the holidays, her finals over two days before Dawn and mine, so I could stay the night without making anyone uncomfortable.
I kissed Dawn's shoulder and tried to wiggle out from behind her without waking her up. I needed to sneak to the restroom before someone caught me. Guys weren't allowed to use it and the rest room for us was in a locked part of the dorm as we weren't allowed in until eight in the morning. Like that stopped anyone. By the time I got back, Dawn was awake. She smiled at me.
"You look so cute," she said.
"What? With my hair a mess, no make up and rumpled clothes?" I grinned at her, primping my hair. It needed a trim.
"Now you're mocking me." She gave me that fake mad-face of hers that was so adorable.
"Just a little," I admitted, leaning down and kissing her. "So what do you want to do now that you survived your very first round of college finals?"
"Stay in bed for a week," she said, stretching wonderfully.
I smirked. "That can be arranged."
She winged the pillow at me. "You're such a guy." Dawn rolled out of bed and fetched her bucket of shampoo and soap and whatever else from her wardrobe. "First I want a shower then we can make a plan."
"Okay."
While she was gone I pulled the covers up messily. If I wanted to be really sweet, I could have changed the sheets and started the wash, but I hadn't totally ruled out a little more between the sheets play time though the showering now made such things unlikely. Still, no sense in taking the option off the books. I stretched out on the bed and turned on the tv. Her dorm might have some silly rules but at least it had cable. I turned on CMT and chilled out to Martina McBride's latest video. She had such beautiful eyes.
I felt even more exhausted than I first thought. Between pre-Law and forensics, my brain was leaking out my ears. I figured it this way, if I somehow didn't get into law school, I could work in forensic science. I had a fascination with forensics, death and serial killers. There was something oddly compelling about it all and I loved working puzzles.
Still, even Martina couldn't keep me awake and I faded out. One moment I was watching the video and the next Dawn was tickling my face with the end of her braid. She smiled down at me.
"Tired you out?" She seemed very pleased at that.
"I'm not complaining about it." I sat up, trying to smooth my wrinkled clothing without much luck. I needed to head home for a shower and some fresh clothes. "Any thoughts about what you want to do?"
"Well, Buffy will be here in a week so I have time to prepare for that. I was thinking we ought to hit that new club you were talking about." Dawn sat next to me.
"Over a hundred imported beers. Sid and I have been having fun there. Sidney's the one who turned me on to it," I said. Sidney went TKE the same time I did. He was probably my best friend, though sometimes he had a knack for getting me in trouble.
"And good music, right." She gave me a look, stabbing a finger at the tv.
"Country music is good music," I protested but I couldn't really convince her of that. "But the Around Midnight is mostly jazz and blues. You'll like it." Or at least I hoped so. I didn't know if Dawn liked that sort of music but she didn't seem unhappy at the announcement it was a jazz hole.
"Good."
"I bet you're excited to see your sister," I said. Dawn didn't talk about her family much. I knew her mother had passed away and her father was never around. It made me feel sad. I wouldn't know what I'd do without my family. She had told me Buffy lived in Cleveland which was sort of a shame. I could see Dawn missed her. That's why I was hoping she'd get into Alpha Sigma Tau. She'd have a nice second family here.
Dawn smiled. "I can't wait." She leaned over and kissed my cheek. "You are so good to stay around to meet her. I know she's excited to meet you."
"Mom and Dad were cool about it. I'll just fly up to Aspen by myself and meet them there." I shrugged. Dawn looked a little disappointed or something with that. I try not to act like I have money but sometimes it's hard. I never even think about it much but I do have it better than a lot of kids, Dawn included. My parents gave me everything I've ever wanted. I had a 1966 convertible Mustang because Dad knew how much I liked muscle and pony cars. Hunter green, tan seats, it was too much of a car for a kid but I had wanted it so I got it. Dad's law firm made good money and he was more than willing to indulge me and my sisters.
"I'm not getting out of L.A. but it'll be great to have Buffy here. She's bringing Faith."
"Are she and Buffy...lovers?" I honestly didn't know much about Buffy, not even what she did for a living in Cleveland. I probably ought to ask but Dawn was never forthcoming with a lot of details about her life. I was torn between liking the mystery and being annoyed, like she didn't really trust me even though we were sleeping together. Of course I hadn't told her Dad was the lawyer you see every other commercial set, at least not right away. I didn't like people to know how much money Dad has and I'd been burned before by people who wanted me for my money. Tracy sprang to mind
Dawn blushed a bit. "No. Buffy likes guys. Faith...well, if it has two legs and is still breathing she'd probably sleep with it. Maybe even if it weren't breathing." Dawn added that last under her breath but I heard her. I have great senses. I try hard to pretend I don't. She leveled her eyes at me. "You'd be safer to keep away from her. She'd break you."
I didn't even have to fake the wounded look. "That hurts."
"Trust me. Faith is sort of bad news." There was something hidden behind Dawn's eyes but I couldn't ferret it out as she paused, considering her next words. "But she's like part of the family now."
"I'm looking forward to meeting them all. So, tonight at the Around Midnight?" I asked.
She nodded. "Want me to meet you at the house?"
"Sure." I moved in for a kiss.
She kissed me quick then put a hand against my chest, pushing gently. "You can probably sneak out now or do you want to catch some more sleep here?"
"Can think of a few other alternatives." I kissed her again, my tongue slipping into her mouth. She tasted like mint. She kissed me back but when I tried to push her into the mattress, she stopped me.
"Uh-uh buddy, I'm clean."
"I knew I should have stolen the body wash." I grinned at her and she shoved me. I had known I wasn't going to get lucky this morning but no harm in trying. I got up. "I should probably get home and make sure Sidney hasn't trashed my room."
Dawn looked perturbed. I knew she liked Sid but sometimes lost patience with the hot water he got me in. "Why would he trash your room? He has one of his own."
I shrugged. "If he trashed his, he'd have to clean it up."
"Men." She looked appropriately disgusted at us.
I just laughed and let myself out.
*
*
*
Dawn kept fussing with her hair as I drove. Okay, I should have put the top up, but I didn't get a convertible to drive around with the top up on a beautiful night like this. She could have braided her hair or something.
I hoped Dawn would like this place. The Around Midnight wasn't the usual hang out with techno music so loud it could pulverize your brain and dance floors so packed it kept us from showing how bad we actually danced. I didn't mind those places. I enjoyed them but every so often I wanted something a little different, quieter.
Sidney and I had been coming here since it opened. It wouldn't stay open long if they got caught serving minors but I had gotten us and Dawn the best fake id's; Dad's money at work. I'd never brought Dawn because I wasn't sure how she'd react to this part of my life since this is where the wanna-be coven met and talked magic to the sounds of blues and jazz. I wasn't ready to tell Dawn I believed in magic. It sounded too damn flaky.
I wasn't sure how interested I was in what Sidney was getting me into. I hadn't really been raised in any faith. We were Protestant in name only. The church going was a Christmas-Easter thing, just so Dad could be seen, good for business. I had nothing against this Wiccan stuff. Sidney was nuts for it. I felt a little weird studying to be a mage. I hadn't believed in magic at first. I did now. I had done some wild stuff and there was an incredible lure, a power to be tapped into.
I knew the importance of that. But I didn't trust our mentor, Amy. There was something off about her. She seemed more motivated by money than teaching us. She kept hinting if we wanted to go to the next level, there would be costs and they all seemed to be monetary. Then there was this geeky dumbass who was Amy's right hand man.I have no tolerance for idiots. Andrew might be smarter than I thought but he was so obsequious you couldn't tell. I couldn't tolerate Andrew. I wasn't sure why Amy did. She seemed smarter than that but they both came from the same town. I didn't know where exactly and I didn't like that bit of mystery either.
Dawn ran her hand up my thigh. "Penny for your thoughts."
"I'm thinking if you don't move your hand I'm going to wrap the 'Stang around a pole," I said so she moved her hand faster. "For the love of God, Dawn."
She laughed, taking her hand off me. "You looked so serious there for a moment."
"Just thinking." "Finals are over, baby. You don't have to do that any more." She smiled at me.
Dawn didn't like dummies any more than I did or at least I didn't think so. Most days it felt like me and Dawn had known each other all our lives instead of just under two months. It was one of the reasons I had my special gift for her with me tonight. I hadn't taken her home to meet the folks yet but I would have if the opportunity had come up. I'd met Xander, Gunn, Fred and Wesley. They were nice enough. Fred and Wes were among the smartest people I'd ever met. Gunn was clever. And while Xander was obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed, he was a nice guy. How many people would be willing to put up a friend's sister just so she could stay in California to finish high school? I was a little suspicious at first, older guy, teen-aged girl but that was just my morbid imagination and too many sex crimes texts digested for class. Xander and I traded anime and played D&D. I liked him.
"I'll take a night off from thinking, I promise," I said.
"A few beers will surely help," she replied as I pulled into the lot.
"Thanks." I reached over and tried to take a snarl out of her hair. I guess I shouldn't have been a jerk about the convertible top.
She pulled me close, kissing me. Her tongue probed the inside of my mouth. I gently pulled away, feeling stirrings below the belt that would just get me in trouble at the moment.
"All we need to do is get caught parking a few days before your sister gets here. She'll kill me."
Dawn's Cheshire grin made the boys tighten; she was too amused by my impending death. "Without a doubt."
We went inside. Sidney already had a table in the corner with a good view of the stage. I was glad he had since the bar was crowed. Totally Consumed was playing tonight and that blues band was simply on fire.
"Hey Sidney," Dawn said, sitting down.
"Hey guys, thought you got lost." Sidney's dark eyes danced as he smirked at me. "Or did you have to find a crowbar to get Connor off of you?"
"Crowbar," she said perkily.
"So I'm back in the dating pool I see," I said and she slapped me as I sat down.
"So what do you want?" Sidney wiggled his pint glass. "I've got Tetley's."
"They make more than tea?" Dawn inquired.
"Good ale," Sidney assured her.
"I'm going to try this Skullsplitter ale, sounds like fun." I loved experimenting with beers. This one was from the Orkneys. "How about you Dawn?" I asked.
She made a face. "I'm not the beer connoisseur you two are. Can I get something else?"
"Whatever you want," I said and Dawn selected a drink of Bailey's Irish Cream and Butterscotch Schnapps. She gave me a guilty look because the drink cost over five dollars. I wish she wouldn't worry about money so much. I know why she does. She only has that little job as a file clerk with Wolfram and Hart that doesn't pay much. I just wished she'd believe me when I tell her I like spending money on her.
"Sidney, where'd you get that ring?" Dawn asked as Totally Consumed started their gig.
Sidney fingered the ring on his middle finger, silver against the dark chocolate of his skin. It was a pentagram worked into knotwork to the point of being almost abstract. "I got it at Merlin's Dream. Do you like it?"
"It's nice." Dawn gave him a wary look. "I didn't know you were into new age stuff."
Sidney beamed. "I'm studying magic. My grandmother was a mambo in Louisiana but my dad hates all that stuff. I think he thinks it makes us look poor or ignorant. I think it's a good way to keep in touch with the world."
"I've heard that. I've known a few Wiccans." Dawn stabbed the ice in her drink, agitated. Her voice was oddly flat.
I could see Dawn was massively uncomfortable with the subject. God, Sidney don't tell her I'm going to those meetings with you. I'd have to talk to Dawn about this privately and see why it sort of made her nervous. If she wanted me to quit, I would.
"Cool," Sidney said. "Maybe you'd like to come to a meeting some time."
Dawn shook her head. "Thanks but it's not...you know, maybe after the holidays I will."
That surprised me. There was a strange glint in her eyes. Never let it be said I actually understood women.
"So what did you think of Connor's surprise?" Sidney asked and I could have killed him.
"What surprise?" Dawn looked up from her drink.
"Sidney," I hissed.
"What? Man, haven't you given it to her yet?" Sidney ran a hand over his shaved head. Now that I thought about it, he sort of looked like Gunn. "Damn Connor, it was all you could talk about. I thought you'd have given it to her by now. Or were you too busy showing her that twig of yours again? She's probably seen enough of that."
Dawn nearly choked on her drink and I gave Sidney the finger, feeling my cheeks burning. "I was going to wait until tonight when we were alone," I said.
"I'm not sure I can wait." Dawn was practically bouncing in her seat.
"I"m sure you can't." I glared at my friend. "Thanks Sid."
"Sorry." He sounded anything but. He was smiling so big the corners of his mouth could meet at the back of his head.
I dug into my pants pocket and took out the ring box. I opened it, seeing how bright Dawn's eyes had gotten. "This is my Irish side showing through," I said. My mouth suddenly felt dry and my hands shook. I tried to hide it by picking up my beer, taking a nervous sip. "It's based on Richard Joyce's wife's wedding ring or so the story goes. Wear it with the heart out and you're searching for love but if you wear it heart in, you've found it." God, that really sounds silly but it was a beautiful ring, at least to me. The heart was Connemara marble and the crown was set with sparkling tiny opals on a silver band. Dawn's expression wasn't quite what I hoped for. It was a mix of wonder and horror.
"Is something wrong?" I shouldn't even ask. I didn't want to know. Maybe I had jumped the gun. Maybe Dawn wasn't ready to commit.
"--nothing. It's beautiful." Dawn took the ring out of the box, her hand shaking so much she nearly dropped it. "I don't know what to say."
"Tell him you'll wear it. I'm not ready to have him crying on my shoulder all night," Sidney said, leaning back, loose-limbed, in his chair.
I gave him the evil eye. "You like it?"
"I love it. I was just thinking...Buffy got a Claddagh from a boyfriend once...." Dawn trailed off.
"And it didn't go good," I guessed.
"Understatement of the year. But that was Buffy and the bad things there, well, they aren't things we'll ever have to worry about." Dawn slid the ring onto her slim finger.
I took her hand, rubbing the ring with my thumb. My hand was still trembling. She leaned into me, kissing me. She tasted spicy and sweet, butterscotchy.
"Oh, get a room you two," Sidney said, waving down the waitress.
I was thinking the back of my car but even as thin as we both were, we'd be too cramped in the Mustang. I broke the kiss when the less-than-sensitive waitress asked me if I wanted a refill. "Make it a Guinness this time and another Smooth Sax for her," I replied.
Dawn smiled, putting her hand on my thigh again. Sequoia was taking notice. That was the last thing I needed here. Down boy. The waitress came back quickly with the drinks as Totally Consumed kicked out some scorching riffs.
"The ring was a Christmas gift but he couldn't wait so he had to run out and get you another gift for under the tree," Sidney said.
"Sidney," I moaned. Can't a man have secrets?
"I didn't think he'd make it through finals without exploding, he was so up about that ring," Sidney was just putting the screws to me at this point.
"Connor, the ring was more than enough. You didn't need to get me a second gift. My gift is going to look sad by comparison," Dawn said, genuinely looking distressed about that.
"It doesn't matter, Dawnie. He's a guy. Just give some attention to Fat Freddy and that's gift enough," Sidney said and I kicked him under the table.
Dawn's eyebrows arched. "Fat Freddy?"
"I do not call it that." I could feel myself blushing. I learned quickly you can't hide behind a pint glass.
"Do you want to know what he does call it?" Sidney leaned on the table, grinning.
"Is that what you boys do? Sit around the frat house, drinking and naming your penises?" Dawn gave us a disgusted looked.
"Well, yeah," Sidney said.
I just rolled my eyes. If he tells her about the dick measuring contests, I'll kill him. I took a gulp of my Guinness then scowled. There was a man at the bar whom I had seen hanging around some of the other college bars and even our parties at the house. He was odd, youngish but not so young as to fit into the frat house scene. He had scary eyes. He was always watching me. Sometimes he was really good at it and only luck let me catch a glimpse of him. He always looked the same, silly spiky brown hair and black leather like he was taking a shot at fashion and missed. It was getting really creepy, seeing him turn up time and again. He was a lot bolder tonight, openly staring at me.
"I've had enough of this guy," I said.
"What?" Dawn looked around, trying to see what I did.
I pointed with my pint glass to the guy. "I've see him hanging around the college. He's always staring at me."
"A perv?" Sidney craned his neck.
"Probably. I'm getting tired of him checking me out," I said with a shiver. I didn't have problems with homosexuals but I didn't want some older dude fantasizing about me.
"He's not a pervert," Dawn said, irritation etching into her face. I could tell it was for this weird guy. "That's Angel."
"You know him?" I was surprised.
"For years. He's a friend and if you saw him around the school he was probably looking for me. Or more likely looking out for me and telling Buffy whatever he sees." Dawn scowled, getting up.
She went over to the guy and started talking to him. She didn't look too happy and neither did he but he never did from what I've seen.
"I'd better go over there," I said. I didn't trust Dawn with this guy. He had the air of a predator. Maybe that was a semester of studying serial killers talking but I couldn't help it. The guy's eyes were dead looking.
"She might not want you riding to the rescue," Sidney said, not looking like he wanted to get up. "She said he was a friend."
"Well, if he's a friend, I should meet him." I had to know more about this guy. It's not that I didn't trust Dawn's judgment but some guys seemed utterly charming and were monsters underneath it all. I wandered over and they both looked at me like I was intruding. "Everything okay, Dawn?"
"It will be if Angel quits spying on me." Dawn crossed her arms.
The man looked indignant. "I'm not spying. I'm here on business, seriously," he insisted and Dawn didn't look mollified. I think she was ready to hit him and I think he knew it too because his face softened as he added, "You really need to leave, Dawn."
"Why?" I asked.
Dawn put her hand on my chest. I pulled her against me protectively. "It's okay, Connor. Angel's a private investigator." "So why do we have to leave?" I persisted.
"Dawn knows why," Angel said. He was looking at me funny. It was making me even more nervous.
"Angel deals with some real bad guys. If he says we might want to come back another night, that's exactly what we want to do," Dawn said. "Angel, this is my boyfriend, Connor."
Angel looked at me even more strangely. He didn't extend a hand to me and I didn't offer either. "Nice to finally meet you, Connor. Dawn's told me a lot about you."
"You would have met at Christmas," Dawn said, sounding nervous. "But maybe now's better. Angel is the head of Angel Investigations, part of Wolfram and Hart's law firm. He's sort of Xander, Gunn, Wes and Fred's boss."
"I see." This man didn't seem like a boss. I'm not sure what he looked like, a thug maybe. Dad had investigators that worked for his firm, too, so that part sounded kosher. Angel just didn't come off like an investigator to me. He seemed too intent on me and not paying enough attention to anything else. It made me really nervous.
"I'm sure we'll get to talk at the holiday party," Angel said.
"You will," Dawn said, putting her hand on my chest, trying to turn me around.
Angel's eyes flashed to the Claddagh and he took her hand. He looked at us both so sadly that I had to wonder why. It seemed like such an out of place emotion on that big blocky face of his. "It's beautiful, Dawn."
She beamed, squeezing his hand. "Connor just gave it to me."
His eyes pinned me and I was right back to feeling terribly uncomfortable. "You have good taste. Dawn, you'd better go."
She nodded. "Come on, Connor. When he tells you that, you know things are gonna get ugly. We should get Sidney out of here, too."
I let her lead me back to the table. I tried to keep my eye on Angel. His never left me and Dawn. I'd have to ask her his last name. I wonder if my Dad knew anything about him or Wolfram and Hart. I knew Dad admired Wolfram and Hart in the abstract. Totally different kind of law than what he practiced or the kind I wanted to pracitce someday.
"Sidney, we're heading out," I said, waving him up.
"What? Why? The night's...oh, god. Stick some ice down your pants."
"Not funny. Why don't you come with us? We can catch a late movie or something," I said, taking Dawn at her word about things getting dangerous. I could see she was worried.
"Is something up?" Sidney asked, looking alert now.
"We just want to do something a little different," Dawn said.
"Okay." Sidney followed us outside. "Tell you what, I'll call it an early night. You two go have fun."
I smiled at him gratefully. "Thanks, bud."
We got back in my Mustang and I waited until we were out on the road before asking, "Do you trust this Angel character, Dawn?"
"Yeah. He's a good guy most of the time. He and Buffy used to be...well, he was the one who gave her the Claddagh. It might not have worked out but they're still friends, sort of. Angel wants what's best for me, believe me," Dawn said. "He wouldn't hurt me or let anyone else hurt me.
She was holding something back. I could tell but I wasn't going to press her on it. "So, do you really want to go see a late night movie?"
She shook her head. "Let's go back to your place this time. The room is a little bigger." She smiled at me.
"Great."
And it was. Dawn usually didn't want to stay the night at the frat house but things were different now. I could feel it. We had taken the next step. Too bad that Angel guy had ruined the night for us. But it didn't matter. The really important stuff had turned out okay. I just wish I could shake the uneasy feeling I had about Angel.
