Pictures in My Mind

author: Lucinda
rating: pg 13?
sequel to Once A Thief, #3 in Stolen Hearts.
pairing: Willow/Remy QPC # if he isn't listed, he should be.
QPC site:
disclaimer: I do not own Willow or anyone else from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I do not own Remy or anyone else from Marvel Comics.
distribution: the archives for any list I send this to, QPC, Twisting the Hellmouth, anyone that asked me for one of my other BtVS/X-Men crossovers that also wants this one.
note: AU from X-Men 350 (the Trial of Gambit) and AU from S5 finale "the Gift" will reference things before those points.


Remy had kissed her on an impulse, and he was starting to think that impulse was going to get him into a lot of trouble. He kept thinking about her, the uneven layers of her light red hair falling around a face pale enough that he knew she didn't get a lot of sunshine, her expressive eyes... not to mention the very appealing shape of her body, with subtle curves and a hint of muscle.

Yes, he had to admit that he found Willow very attractive, physically. There was also the way she'd looked at him, with curiosity and not a single sliver of the phobic reaction that many humans had when confronted with a visible mutant. Of course, that caught in amber trick of hers made him think that she wasn't exactly a normal human herself. She was interesting, and pretty...

And Remy did not want to get seriously involved with another female. He'd befriended Storm and that had caused him to join the X-Men. That had caused him to meet and fall in love with Rogue. That had ended very badly when the dark spots in his past had come out, and she'd rejected him, and them left him to die. In the middle, well, not quite middle, but a long ways inland of Antarctica. He'd almost froze to death, and had taken it as a definite sign that this wasn't just a little argument and 'off phase' of a relationship. No, women were trouble for him. And that was without even going into Candra and Belle...

He'd forced himself to clubs and bars, hoping that the sights of so many other women would chase Willow from his mind, but it hadn't worked. Actually, he thought that might have been what had triggered the dreams, or perhaps nightmares would be closer for some of them.

Images of walking through cemeteries with a pretty blond, fighting vampires... The terrible sight of the teachers lounge soaked with blood, the bodies of several students propped on and near the couch as if they were simply watching cartoons... A huge snake thing eating someone that the dreams whispered was the Principal... But the one that kept repeating was of her blond friend plummeting from a construction scaffold towards a rippling blue portal, impacting with the ground, her death closing the portal. Devastating images of pain and horror. He'd never seen the people in the dreams in his waking life, but he knew them.

Willow seemed to have a past that was almost as confusing and complicated as his. The images kept making him want to take her in his arms and make her forget about all the pain in the past, to whisper sweet promises into her ears, to see if her skin tasted as sweet as her smile. He felt as if he knew her, or knew things about her, far more than his surveillance of her house would tell him. But he wanted to know more. He wanted to sit with her in the sunlight, to see her face light up when he gave her roses, to have candle light dinners with her. Yeah, he had it bad for her.

But Remy was a bit more cautious now than he'd been once upon a time. He wanted to have more of an idea what was real from Willow's past. That called for a bit of research. It was no difficulty at all to determine that she had actually come from Sunnydale in California, just like the dreams had shown. A little more research had discovered that she was in the graduating class of nineteen ninety nine, and that the school had 'inexplicably' blown up during the graduation ceremony. Sunnydale had three times the cemeteries of any other town it's size, and they were all pretty active. The death count was obscene, and almost all of them were by some sort of violent and occasionally gruesome method.

The images of the people that she'd been closest too were also from the school, and he gave a smile at the fact that Sunnydale had their school graduating class and staff pictures online. The blond he'd seen was named Buffy, and she was dead, listed as a 'suicide'. The dark haired boy was Alexander Harris, and he was now employed at a construction company. He wondered why Willow had left, if Buffy's death had anything to do with it.

Willow was in his mind, under his skin, affecting him in a way few people had ever managed. And he could only hold himself responsible. It wouldn't have happened if he hadn't kissed her. If she hadn't kissed back, tasting of honey and cinnamon. Part of him was certain that he should run, go far far away and try to forget about her, forget this strange pull she had on him.

Even as he considered that that would be the wise thing, the prudent thing to do, Remy knew that it wouldn't happen. He was many things, but prudent and wise didn't appear on that list. He would stay, he would watch her... he had her email address, or at least an email address for her.

It didn't take long for him to type out an email to send her. It wasn't too personal, and it certainly didn't go into the dreams that he'd been having of her past, but... she would know that it was from him. He actually wanted her to know it was him, he was just a bit less certain why.

More to the point, he was in denial as to why he wanted her to know it was from him. Remy was certain that he didn't need to get involved with another woman, and that certainty was blinding him to the fact that he was already involved in a way. When the images of a woman haunt your days and you dream about her every night, that's involvement, even if she's not dreaming of you.

Remy wasn't certain if he wanted her to dream of his past like he was dreaming of hers. The last time his past had come out... He still didn't know how he hadn't froze to death.

Remy prayed to a god that he was no longer certain he believed in that things wouldn't go that badly. Even if she didn't care for him, don't let her try to kill him. Please...

end Pictures in my Mind