Not Crazy-Just Different
The Continuing Saga of Teen Angst (written by DC Holliwether)
October 30th
7:39 AM
It's Mischief Night, it's Mischief Night! And that also means that it's almost Halloween! We got the day off, thank goodness. Today and tomorrow. Umm. Is it bad that I had a dream last night about a certain person? Well, goodness gosh golly. I don't know if Percy would freak out if he knew that I like him or not. It's bothering me though.
I am a complete psychopath. I think I should be on some STRONG dose of medication!
Anyway, I can't really think of anything really all that smart to say.
Received a letter from Sammy last night. She says she and Chandler are considering going out of town for two weeks. Woo-hoo. They said that they were going to let Bizzy stay with Granny Holliwether.
Now, take a second to imagine this. An old, somewhat frumpy old lady, not to mention a semi-grumpy old man (Grandpa Holliwether) taking care of a little iguana who has grown quite accustomed to the love and energy of a fifteen year old girl.
Does that bother anyone else?
I'm so mean.
9:15 AM
Gag me! I hate school. But you know what? If it took me so long to establish that, then that's kinda pathetic.
See, what happened was all of a sudden, I just got totally sick of it. Of writing, of hurrying to classes so Snape can yell at me to sit down when I hurt my tailbone, and especially of seeing everyone 24/7!
Whoa. That was such a bitter statement there. That was angry Darby there, people. You know, I try to stay upbeat a lot, but sometimes I just can't help being evil.
Wah hahaha.
Am going to whine and complain to Percy and Ollie now. Ta-ta.
11:07 AM
Walked down the stairs to the common room and flopped onto the couch next to Percy, who was playing Wizard's Chess with Ollie. They both turned to look at me briefly, before turning quickly back to their game.
"I take it you're PO'ed at someone?" Oliver suggested dryly, deep in thought as what piece to play.
"Darby? Angry at another student? Never!" Percy said sarcastically.
"No, I am not angry at anyone at this school," I said, leaning my head back on the arm rest on the sofa.
"Well, there is a first."
"No. I am mad at the whole school!" I cried emotionally.
"Cheer up, Darby. The whole school could be mad at YOU." Oliver always has some strange comment that actually makes sense. He's quite poignant at times. Hey, cool! Big word!
"You're right. Anyways, sorry for interrupting," I said.
"That reminds me of a joke," Percy mused. Now, you may not think that Percy knows any jokes. Or has any trace of sense of humor, I guess. But once you get to know him, he can really make you laugh sometimes. He is just unbelievably shy.
"Well, do tell," I said, sitting up. "Hmm. That rhymed." I've got issues over things that rhyme.
"Ok. Knock, knock," Percy began. I was beginning to catch on a little.
But in unison, Oliver and replied "Who's there?"
"An interrupting cow." He was smiling like he had just won a million Galleons. Or married Penny. Or became Head Boy. Or anything else he might like. No, Head Boy (notice it is in capitals) would top it all.
"An interrupting-."
"MOO!" Percy shouted. He rolled over on the couch, wheezing and panting. I couldn't help it. It was just that fact that Percy was freaking out over some old joke. I doubled over in laughter and accidentally smacked my head on his shoulder. Oliver stared at the two of us like we were a pair of loons.
Mayhaps we are!
"That was a good one," Ollie said quietly.
By then, we were unstoppable. People were staring at us like we were highly disturbed, which might be quite true. Percy and I just could not stop laughing. I was rocking back and forth, continually smacking my head on his shoulder. It wasn't often that Percy the perfect prefect (hey, I just realized how close those two words are in spelling! WOW!) lets loose in front of people that he doesn't know.
Suddenly, Dumbledore and Cornelius Fudge entered the common room, wands drawn. "ALL RIGHT! LISTEN UP!" Dumbledore said loudly. "Now, we can do this either the easy way, or the hard way, Potter!"
"What is up with this, my man?" Harry Potter says, standing up. He's stumbling around and stuff. "Ya gotta believe me, I have no idea what you're implying!"
"Sorry, fella, but this is the way that it has to be," Fudge says, as the Azkaban SWAT team enters our common room. The grab him by the arms, snap a pair of handcuffs on his wrists, and then the cops pull up in their squad cars and drive him off to the station.
Okay, okay. You caught me. That didn't really happen.
But I just got really bored with what I was writing, and it all went off on a wild goose chase from there. And to think that it ended with the new Hogwarts golden child getting hauled off!
Well, what really happened was that for about five minutes, Percy and I couldn't contain ourselves. I was holding his arm for support because if I were to let go I would topple off of the sofa and do a face plant right on the carpet.
Ouch. Carpet is supposed to be soft and cushy, but gosh, that would hurt!
I couldn't breathe, so I finally had to stop. I leaned on Percy's shoulder. His face was flushed, and he took a deep breath. There were tears of laughter on his cheeks. I handed him a Kleenex and sat up.
A shining moment of hysterical humor, my friends.
4:45 PM
Am very nervous right now. I just ate five chocolate frogs. Gave the cards to Oliver. Not very healthy, I know. But it could be worse, I could be out doing drugs instead of scarfing chocolate.
OK. Me, Ollie, Percy and Penny had a small Mischief Night meeting in the library. We tried to think up some semi-harmless pranks to pull, when Penelope had a shining idea.
So tonight, Oliver is going with Penny to slip some Wizo-Lax (AKA the wizard version of a medication that I do not feel like sharing it's purpose, as it is almost time for dinner, and I'm sure you can conclude what it is, due to the last part of it's name) into Snape's goblet, while Percy and I stage a wicked fight. Snape is on 'fight duty' tonight, meaning any dinner table squabbling will be his to resolve.
Wish me luck!
5:37 PM
It was great!
Penny and Ollie got ready, as Percy and I looked nervously to one another. Soon, the two had slipped away, and Percy and I just stood up.
"What is that supposed to mean?!" I screeched suddenly.
"You tell me!" Percy said in a wavering tone.
"Why you little-!" I yelled, finishing by slapping him across the face. Everyone in the hall looked on, interested. Hogwarts loves a fight. And by golly, were they going to get one!
"Don't you slap me!" he yelled back.
"Why?! Can you not take it, you girly-man?!" Gosh, was I going to regret this later. He looked like I had slapped him again.
"Well, at least ONE of us acts like a girl. We all know it's not you, Holliwether!" It was now my turn to be shocked. And even though we were faking it, it still hurt my feelings.
Snape hurried over to us.
"Break it up! Twenty points from Gryffindor for this RIDICULOUS display!" Snapey-poo yelled. Boy, was he going to get his! Haha. I scowled and sat down, as did Percy.
When Snape had walked away, Penny and Ollie returned.
"Did you do it?" I asked excitedly.
This was at the same time that Percy asked "Am I REALLY a girly man?"
"No, sweetie. It was all for show."
"Oh. Well, what I said was just for show, too."
"Well, we did it," Oliver said with a happy, jack-o-lantern grin. I clapped my hands. Four heads turned to see Snape take a huge swig from his goblet.
Time seemed to slow. His face distorted quickly, and he suddenly stood up as fast as possible and bolted from the Great Hall. The four of us dissolved into laughter.
We are geniuses, no?
October 30th
7:39 AM
It's Mischief Night, it's Mischief Night! And that also means that it's almost Halloween! We got the day off, thank goodness. Today and tomorrow. Umm. Is it bad that I had a dream last night about a certain person? Well, goodness gosh golly. I don't know if Percy would freak out if he knew that I like him or not. It's bothering me though.
I am a complete psychopath. I think I should be on some STRONG dose of medication!
Anyway, I can't really think of anything really all that smart to say.
Received a letter from Sammy last night. She says she and Chandler are considering going out of town for two weeks. Woo-hoo. They said that they were going to let Bizzy stay with Granny Holliwether.
Now, take a second to imagine this. An old, somewhat frumpy old lady, not to mention a semi-grumpy old man (Grandpa Holliwether) taking care of a little iguana who has grown quite accustomed to the love and energy of a fifteen year old girl.
Does that bother anyone else?
I'm so mean.
9:15 AM
Gag me! I hate school. But you know what? If it took me so long to establish that, then that's kinda pathetic.
See, what happened was all of a sudden, I just got totally sick of it. Of writing, of hurrying to classes so Snape can yell at me to sit down when I hurt my tailbone, and especially of seeing everyone 24/7!
Whoa. That was such a bitter statement there. That was angry Darby there, people. You know, I try to stay upbeat a lot, but sometimes I just can't help being evil.
Wah hahaha.
Am going to whine and complain to Percy and Ollie now. Ta-ta.
11:07 AM
Walked down the stairs to the common room and flopped onto the couch next to Percy, who was playing Wizard's Chess with Ollie. They both turned to look at me briefly, before turning quickly back to their game.
"I take it you're PO'ed at someone?" Oliver suggested dryly, deep in thought as what piece to play.
"Darby? Angry at another student? Never!" Percy said sarcastically.
"No, I am not angry at anyone at this school," I said, leaning my head back on the arm rest on the sofa.
"Well, there is a first."
"No. I am mad at the whole school!" I cried emotionally.
"Cheer up, Darby. The whole school could be mad at YOU." Oliver always has some strange comment that actually makes sense. He's quite poignant at times. Hey, cool! Big word!
"You're right. Anyways, sorry for interrupting," I said.
"That reminds me of a joke," Percy mused. Now, you may not think that Percy knows any jokes. Or has any trace of sense of humor, I guess. But once you get to know him, he can really make you laugh sometimes. He is just unbelievably shy.
"Well, do tell," I said, sitting up. "Hmm. That rhymed." I've got issues over things that rhyme.
"Ok. Knock, knock," Percy began. I was beginning to catch on a little.
But in unison, Oliver and replied "Who's there?"
"An interrupting cow." He was smiling like he had just won a million Galleons. Or married Penny. Or became Head Boy. Or anything else he might like. No, Head Boy (notice it is in capitals) would top it all.
"An interrupting-."
"MOO!" Percy shouted. He rolled over on the couch, wheezing and panting. I couldn't help it. It was just that fact that Percy was freaking out over some old joke. I doubled over in laughter and accidentally smacked my head on his shoulder. Oliver stared at the two of us like we were a pair of loons.
Mayhaps we are!
"That was a good one," Ollie said quietly.
By then, we were unstoppable. People were staring at us like we were highly disturbed, which might be quite true. Percy and I just could not stop laughing. I was rocking back and forth, continually smacking my head on his shoulder. It wasn't often that Percy the perfect prefect (hey, I just realized how close those two words are in spelling! WOW!) lets loose in front of people that he doesn't know.
Suddenly, Dumbledore and Cornelius Fudge entered the common room, wands drawn. "ALL RIGHT! LISTEN UP!" Dumbledore said loudly. "Now, we can do this either the easy way, or the hard way, Potter!"
"What is up with this, my man?" Harry Potter says, standing up. He's stumbling around and stuff. "Ya gotta believe me, I have no idea what you're implying!"
"Sorry, fella, but this is the way that it has to be," Fudge says, as the Azkaban SWAT team enters our common room. The grab him by the arms, snap a pair of handcuffs on his wrists, and then the cops pull up in their squad cars and drive him off to the station.
Okay, okay. You caught me. That didn't really happen.
But I just got really bored with what I was writing, and it all went off on a wild goose chase from there. And to think that it ended with the new Hogwarts golden child getting hauled off!
Well, what really happened was that for about five minutes, Percy and I couldn't contain ourselves. I was holding his arm for support because if I were to let go I would topple off of the sofa and do a face plant right on the carpet.
Ouch. Carpet is supposed to be soft and cushy, but gosh, that would hurt!
I couldn't breathe, so I finally had to stop. I leaned on Percy's shoulder. His face was flushed, and he took a deep breath. There were tears of laughter on his cheeks. I handed him a Kleenex and sat up.
A shining moment of hysterical humor, my friends.
4:45 PM
Am very nervous right now. I just ate five chocolate frogs. Gave the cards to Oliver. Not very healthy, I know. But it could be worse, I could be out doing drugs instead of scarfing chocolate.
OK. Me, Ollie, Percy and Penny had a small Mischief Night meeting in the library. We tried to think up some semi-harmless pranks to pull, when Penelope had a shining idea.
So tonight, Oliver is going with Penny to slip some Wizo-Lax (AKA the wizard version of a medication that I do not feel like sharing it's purpose, as it is almost time for dinner, and I'm sure you can conclude what it is, due to the last part of it's name) into Snape's goblet, while Percy and I stage a wicked fight. Snape is on 'fight duty' tonight, meaning any dinner table squabbling will be his to resolve.
Wish me luck!
5:37 PM
It was great!
Penny and Ollie got ready, as Percy and I looked nervously to one another. Soon, the two had slipped away, and Percy and I just stood up.
"What is that supposed to mean?!" I screeched suddenly.
"You tell me!" Percy said in a wavering tone.
"Why you little-!" I yelled, finishing by slapping him across the face. Everyone in the hall looked on, interested. Hogwarts loves a fight. And by golly, were they going to get one!
"Don't you slap me!" he yelled back.
"Why?! Can you not take it, you girly-man?!" Gosh, was I going to regret this later. He looked like I had slapped him again.
"Well, at least ONE of us acts like a girl. We all know it's not you, Holliwether!" It was now my turn to be shocked. And even though we were faking it, it still hurt my feelings.
Snape hurried over to us.
"Break it up! Twenty points from Gryffindor for this RIDICULOUS display!" Snapey-poo yelled. Boy, was he going to get his! Haha. I scowled and sat down, as did Percy.
When Snape had walked away, Penny and Ollie returned.
"Did you do it?" I asked excitedly.
This was at the same time that Percy asked "Am I REALLY a girly man?"
"No, sweetie. It was all for show."
"Oh. Well, what I said was just for show, too."
"Well, we did it," Oliver said with a happy, jack-o-lantern grin. I clapped my hands. Four heads turned to see Snape take a huge swig from his goblet.
Time seemed to slow. His face distorted quickly, and he suddenly stood up as fast as possible and bolted from the Great Hall. The four of us dissolved into laughter.
We are geniuses, no?
