~*~*~ For Rosie ~*~*~

"I hate you." She let out a little choked sob at his statement. Remus turned and walked away. He didn't see the hurt in her teary eyes switch in seconds to anger and resentment.
"You're not who I thought you were, Remus Lupin. You ain't no nice guy!" Her words stung a bit, but he held back any offensive comments. (Ain't isn't a word . . .stupid American.) He just wanted to get away.
"I never want to see you again!" This time he couldn't remain quiet.
"GOOD! LEAVE THEN! GO BACK TO YOUR OWN GODDAM COUNTRY!"

Remus sat on his bed and looked at the floor. Why had she done this to him? They had had something special. Or maybe they didn't. Or maybe he just shouldn't have said the things he said . . . Maybe he should just talk to her. . . Come to think of it, that was a stupid idea. Talking to her, trying to explain, trying to be honest and guilt-ridden was what had gotten him into this mess in the first place. Why had he felt the need to tell her so soon? Because you knew she was special, a voice in the back of his mind said. You didn't want to lose her later, after growing attached. You're too logical for your own good. But come to think of it, Remus, he thought to himself, you're not being logical at all. She needed time for it to sink in. He shouldn't have gotten angry at her right away like that, for simply not understanding. He got up and made his way to the door. He should apologize. He had his hand on the doorknob, and was about to go. . .but the stubbornness that had always been a part of his character came back. He didn't do anything wrong, he told himself again, and went back to his bed and tried to sleep. But sleep never came . . .

I lie awake
I drive myself crazy,
Drive myself crazy,
thinking of you.
Made a mistake
when I let you go baby.
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do

Light poured through the window next to his bed. His eyes and head were aching due to lack of sleep. He held his head in his hands. Her words were still ringing in his mind. . . how could he have agreed that he never wanted to see her again? Had it not been the day before they were planning their summer together? But that's what made you tell her, stupid fuck up. . . you finally realized she was serious. . .

I was such a fool, I couldn't see it.
Just how good you were to me

Determination suddenly replaced his stubbornness. He looked at his watch. Breakfast was already over. But it was Saturday. . . everyone would be in the Common Room. He walked downstairs, still in his pajamas, and not caring. He looked all over for her, but she was no where to be seen. Idiot, he thought to himself, she's probably in a state of emotional distress in her dormitory. And its your fault. Just then he saw her, the blonde Sirius had a crush on, that other girl she was always with. She came over to him.
"Hi Remus! Here!" she handed him an envelope from. . .yes it was definitely from her. He recognized the handwriting. "She told me to give it to you." She said before walking away.
"Wait! Why couldn't she give it to me?"
"Well she is in America now, isn't she?" Blondie replied mockingly. Remus's expression was of total surprise and cluelessness. "Oh my god. . . you didn't know? Remus, she went back to that school in America, she left last-" But Remus didn't hear her finish. He was already running back to his dormitory, shredding the envelope. There was piece of paper inside, with one sentence written in her perfect, curly handwriting. Remus read it, and felt his eyes brimming with hot tears: It is better to have love than lost, than to never have loved at all.

And now I'm left
With all this pain,
I've only got
Myself to blame. . .