Fifteen more days till TORI! I'm so excited! I get to see the Goddess
live! I've been listening to "Under the Pink" and "Scarlett's Walk" for
two weeks straight. It's wonderful. I have "gold dust" and "Bells for
Her" stuck in my head permanently. It's great! Meanwhile, I've neglected
to turn in two major essays and nearly flunked my Geology quiz, wait, never
mind. I DID flunk my quiz. But at least the cute guy hit on me. That
totally makes up for it!
Chapter 15: The Sword of Damocles
Stepping off the elevator, Riff Raff handed Frank the glass of wine he had poured in the elevator.
HEY FRANKIE, WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
Frank snapped, " Magenta.."
WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR POT?
"....Columbia..."
BAD CHOICE
"....go assist Riff Raff...."
HE NEEDS A BLOW JOB AND TWO HEADS ARE BETTER THAN ONE!
"...I will entertain ...uh huh huh..." He trailed off and looked pointedly at Brad and Janet.
"Brad Majors. And this is my fiancée, Janet 'Vice'." Brad said proudly
" Weiss." Janet hissed waspishly.
"Weiss." Brad amended
SAY SOMETHING IN FRENCH
"Enchante." Frank said, kissing Janet's hand while she giggled like a sissy.
WHAT'S IT MEAN?
"Well! how nice...." Frank said.
THAT'S NOT WHAT IT MEANS!
"And what charming underclothes you both have, " he smirked, taking a closer look at Brad's....attributes.
THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!
"But here. Put these on..." He gestured to Magenta, who handed the pair two lab coats.
AND TAKE THOSE OFF!
"....They'll make you feel less......"
NAKED?
".....vulnerable....."
SAME THING!
"......Its not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them... hospitality....."
HORSE BRUTALITY!
"Hospitality!?" Brad exploded.
HORSE BRUTALITY!?
"All we asked was to use your telephone, God damn it, a reasonable request which you've chosen to ignore!" He shouted at Frank.
Janet, touched his arm, saying. "Brad, don't be ungrateful."
"Ungrateful!" Brad roared, whipping off his glasses like some unmanly version of Clark Kent.
IT'S SUPERASSHOLE!
Frank said in an..admiring...tone, "How forceful you are, Brad.
DESCRIBE TIM CURRY!
"....Such a perfect specimen of manhood. So....." He trailed off and blatantly stared at Brad's crotch.
BIG!
"...dominant..." He finished.
"Please tell me I'm not going to be required to find Potter sexually attractive." Snape whispered to Hermione, his voice low and pleading.
"Well sir, if that's what you want to hear..."
"Shot me. Just shoot me now."
"I left my gut at the castle. Can you wait until we get back home?"
"If you insist."
"You must be awfully proud of him, Janet." Frank said rather smugly.
JANET, ARE YOU A SLUT?
"Well, yes. I am." Janet said, giggling and flustered.
Turning to Brad, Frank asked, "Do you have any-"
TESTICLES!
"..tattoos Brad?"
"Certainly not!" Brad said indignantly.
ASK JANET!
Frank seemed mildly disappointed. "Oh well, how about you?" He asked Janet.
"No," she replied, still giggling.
Riff Raff approached Frank. "Everything is in readiness, master-"
BATER!
"......We merely await your word."
SPERM!
Frank Spilled the wine he had barely touched onto Riff Raff
OH NO! MY NEW SUIT! MY BEST SUIT! MY ONLY SUIT!
"Get your gloves out!" Dee hissed to everyone. Everyone obliged. They slipped on the single latex glove just as Frankie slipped his on onscreen, and everyone snapped it just as Frankie snapped his.
"OW!" Apparently Ron had snapped his a bit too hard. "Bloody Stretchy these things are!"
HEY FRANKIE, WHEN'S THE ORGY AND WHO'S INVITED?
Frank announced grandly, "Tonight, my unconventional conventionists... you are about to witness a new breakthrough in biochemical.."
BISEXUAL!
"...research... and paradise is to be mine...It was strange the way it happened... suddenly you get a break... whole pieces start to fit into place......"
LIKE A PUZZLE?
".......not a sign of being....."
ARE YOU A FOOL?
".....what a fool! The answer was there all the time, it took a small accident to make it happen...."
WHAT WAS YOUR BIRTH?
"AN ACCIDENT!" Frank shouted.
Magenta and Columbia echoed, "An accident!"
".......And that's how I discovered the secret, that elusive ingredient, that...."
WHO GIVES THE BEST HEAD ON STAR TRACK?
"..... SPARK that is the breath of life......."
WILL YOU FUCK EVERYONE IN THE AUDIENCE TONIGHT?
"..Yes,"
DO YOU KNOW ABOOUT GAY SEX?
"...I have that knowledge... ....."
WHAT DO YOU HAVE BETWEEN YOUR LEGS?
"......I hold the secret......"
TO LIFE?
"....to life......"
ITSELF?
"....itself!" Frank finished with a flurry.
F!
"You see," he continued,
K!
"You are fortunate for tonight is the night that my beautiful creature is destined to be BORN!" Frankie gestured grandly to the really big tank behind him and the unconventional conventioneers clapped wildly. Janet began to clap as well, but Brad grabbed her hands and made her stop.
JANET'S GOT THE CLAP AND NOW BRAD'S GOT IT TOO!
Magenta and Columbia grabbed a hold of the cloth revealing a giant tank with a mummy-like figure inside..
MAGENTA IS UP AT BAT....NO BALLS, NO HITS, NO TITS EITHER!
FRANK, HOW DO YOU SAY FUCK YOU IN CHINESE?
"Up now! Throw open the switches on the sonic oscillator..." Frank ordered Riff Raff,
OSCILLATOR?! I JUST MET HER!
"..... and step the reactor power input THREE MORE POINTS! "
Riff Raff threw a really big switch and three triangles lit up red as the power rose.
THREE! MORE! DORITOS!
" Oh, Brad!" Janet cried, near hysterical as the tank began to glow and the lights went out.
HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE, BRAD?
"It's all right, Janet." Brad said stalwartly putting his arm around his woman.
A SIX-FOOT SELF-INSERTING TAMPON WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED.
A chandelier-like object lowered from the ceiling directly above the tank, and Frankie turned different knobs with great effort dripping different colored liquids into the tank below.
RED! ORANGE! YELLOW! GREEN! BLUE! PURPLE! MORE GREEN!
The audience shouted as Frankie turned each knob.
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
FUCK IT! LET'S NUKE THE BASTARD!
The figure in the tank suddenly became skeletal.
OH LOOK! ROCKY'S FIRST BONER!
A hand with only four fingers reached out and grabbed the edge of the tank.
THROW HIM BACK! HE;S ONLY GOT FOUR FINGERS!
the figure mumbled something incomprehensible. He removed the bandages from his head to reveal a handsome blonde young man.
Frank lunged for the creature and cried out, " Oh! Rocky!"
Rocky grabbed a hold of the chandelier as it rose up, and so evaded Frankie's ardent embrace. Frankie raced over to Riff Raff who was winding the chandelier and kicked him hard. " The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head, And I've got the feeling someone's gonna be cutting the thread." Riff Raff began to lower the chandelier once more. "Oh, woe is me, my life is a misery. Oh, can't you see, that I'm at the start of a pretty big downer."
Frankie lunged for Rocky once more, but missed and fell into the tank, as rocky let go of the chandelier and landed between Magenta and Columbia who began to cut off his bandages. When they were done, rocky was standing in a pair of Gold Lame short shorts and very little else. Snape watched the events onscreen in Horror. "I'm in love with Malfoy!?"
Hermione winced. "Yes, Sir."
"Malfoy!"
"Yes, sir."
Snape commenced to hyperventilate very rapidly and Hermione guided his head between his knees and frantically instructed him to breathe deeply. Draco for his part was torn between bouts of hysterical laughter and tears of horror.
"I have to wear that!?"
"Yes, Draco."
"That!"
"Yes Draco."
"But they're so tiny! And Gold!"
"Yes, Draco."
"I'll be cold!"
"Draco, right now, cold is the lest of your worries."
"I'm trying to pointedly ignore that until I can get sufficiently drunk to handle that, Potter, now shut your hole!"
"Well, there's is a bar in the lobby.."
Meanwhile, back onscreen, rocky had finished his song and dance number and had finally been caught by a very persistent Frank.
"Well really." Frank said,
NO, FRANKLY!
"......That's no way to behave on your first day out."
OF THE CLOSET!
Rocky sat just behind a ladder, and it framed him rather like a prison cell.
IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, BEAT YOUR BARS, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, BEAT YOUR BARS, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, AND YOU REALLY WANT TO SHOW IT, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT BEAT YOUR BARS.
Rocky beat the bars of the ladder and made sounds like a forlorn puppy.
" But since you're such an exceptional beauty, I am prepared to forgive you." Frankie relented, fawning over Rocky's golden thighs.
"Ugh, Ugh" Rocky grunted, clapping like a child. The audience clapped right along with him.
"Oh, I just love success!" Frankie gushed, clasping his hands together.
YOU LOVE ANYTHING WITH A 'SUCK' IN IT!
"He's a credit to your genius, master." Riff Raff intoned.
"Yes." Frankie glowed with praise.
Magenta followed, "A triumph of your will!"
Frank said louder, "Yes."
Columbia looked at Rocky, resting her arms, (and most of her breasts0 on the side of the tank. "He's OK!"
YOU BLEW IT, YOU BITCH!
Frank looked at her disbelievingly. "OK?!"
KILL THE ROACH!
Frank smacked Columbia on the arm, causing her to back off of the tank.
GET YOUR TITS OFF MY TANK!
"O.K.! I think we can do better than that. Humph!" He flounced away from her.
ASK KEN AND BARBIE!
"Well, Brad and Janet, what do you think of him?
LIE THROUGH YOUR TEETH, BITCH!
Janet faltered, for a moment, looking at brad before answering, "Well, I don't like men with too many muscles."
JUST ONE BIG ONE!
"I didn't make him... FOR YOU!" Frank said impudently.
YEAH, BUT SHE GETS HIM ANYWAY!
"Please tell me it doesn't get any worse." Snap pleaded Hermione
"You do get to axe murder Neville in a second." She said hopefully.
Neville's eyes began to bulge out of his head and he crouched very low in his seat.
Snape grinned a feral grin. "At least there's something to look forward to. And after that?"
"Well..." Hermione hesitated, thinking of the seduction scenes.
Snape observed her hesitation and the strange look on her face and read it as an ill omen. "I'm Afraid."
"You bloody should be." She agreed, ribbing his back consolingly.
DUM DUM DUUUUUUUUUUUUM!
Next Chapter: Whatever happened to Saturday night? Featuring Delivery Boy! Neville. Axe Murderer! Frankie! Confetti galore and Frankie and Rocky say "I do!" Egads! Thank you and enjoy the show.
Be kind. Review.
Chapter 15: The Sword of Damocles
Stepping off the elevator, Riff Raff handed Frank the glass of wine he had poured in the elevator.
HEY FRANKIE, WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
Frank snapped, " Magenta.."
WHERE DO YOU GET YOUR POT?
"....Columbia..."
BAD CHOICE
"....go assist Riff Raff...."
HE NEEDS A BLOW JOB AND TWO HEADS ARE BETTER THAN ONE!
"...I will entertain ...uh huh huh..." He trailed off and looked pointedly at Brad and Janet.
"Brad Majors. And this is my fiancée, Janet 'Vice'." Brad said proudly
" Weiss." Janet hissed waspishly.
"Weiss." Brad amended
SAY SOMETHING IN FRENCH
"Enchante." Frank said, kissing Janet's hand while she giggled like a sissy.
WHAT'S IT MEAN?
"Well! how nice...." Frank said.
THAT'S NOT WHAT IT MEANS!
"And what charming underclothes you both have, " he smirked, taking a closer look at Brad's....attributes.
THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!
"But here. Put these on..." He gestured to Magenta, who handed the pair two lab coats.
AND TAKE THOSE OFF!
"....They'll make you feel less......"
NAKED?
".....vulnerable....."
SAME THING!
"......Its not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them... hospitality....."
HORSE BRUTALITY!
"Hospitality!?" Brad exploded.
HORSE BRUTALITY!?
"All we asked was to use your telephone, God damn it, a reasonable request which you've chosen to ignore!" He shouted at Frank.
Janet, touched his arm, saying. "Brad, don't be ungrateful."
"Ungrateful!" Brad roared, whipping off his glasses like some unmanly version of Clark Kent.
IT'S SUPERASSHOLE!
Frank said in an..admiring...tone, "How forceful you are, Brad.
DESCRIBE TIM CURRY!
"....Such a perfect specimen of manhood. So....." He trailed off and blatantly stared at Brad's crotch.
BIG!
"...dominant..." He finished.
"Please tell me I'm not going to be required to find Potter sexually attractive." Snape whispered to Hermione, his voice low and pleading.
"Well sir, if that's what you want to hear..."
"Shot me. Just shoot me now."
"I left my gut at the castle. Can you wait until we get back home?"
"If you insist."
"You must be awfully proud of him, Janet." Frank said rather smugly.
JANET, ARE YOU A SLUT?
"Well, yes. I am." Janet said, giggling and flustered.
Turning to Brad, Frank asked, "Do you have any-"
TESTICLES!
"..tattoos Brad?"
"Certainly not!" Brad said indignantly.
ASK JANET!
Frank seemed mildly disappointed. "Oh well, how about you?" He asked Janet.
"No," she replied, still giggling.
Riff Raff approached Frank. "Everything is in readiness, master-"
BATER!
"......We merely await your word."
SPERM!
Frank Spilled the wine he had barely touched onto Riff Raff
OH NO! MY NEW SUIT! MY BEST SUIT! MY ONLY SUIT!
"Get your gloves out!" Dee hissed to everyone. Everyone obliged. They slipped on the single latex glove just as Frankie slipped his on onscreen, and everyone snapped it just as Frankie snapped his.
"OW!" Apparently Ron had snapped his a bit too hard. "Bloody Stretchy these things are!"
HEY FRANKIE, WHEN'S THE ORGY AND WHO'S INVITED?
Frank announced grandly, "Tonight, my unconventional conventionists... you are about to witness a new breakthrough in biochemical.."
BISEXUAL!
"...research... and paradise is to be mine...It was strange the way it happened... suddenly you get a break... whole pieces start to fit into place......"
LIKE A PUZZLE?
".......not a sign of being....."
ARE YOU A FOOL?
".....what a fool! The answer was there all the time, it took a small accident to make it happen...."
WHAT WAS YOUR BIRTH?
"AN ACCIDENT!" Frank shouted.
Magenta and Columbia echoed, "An accident!"
".......And that's how I discovered the secret, that elusive ingredient, that...."
WHO GIVES THE BEST HEAD ON STAR TRACK?
"..... SPARK that is the breath of life......."
WILL YOU FUCK EVERYONE IN THE AUDIENCE TONIGHT?
"..Yes,"
DO YOU KNOW ABOOUT GAY SEX?
"...I have that knowledge... ....."
WHAT DO YOU HAVE BETWEEN YOUR LEGS?
"......I hold the secret......"
TO LIFE?
"....to life......"
ITSELF?
"....itself!" Frank finished with a flurry.
F!
"You see," he continued,
K!
"You are fortunate for tonight is the night that my beautiful creature is destined to be BORN!" Frankie gestured grandly to the really big tank behind him and the unconventional conventioneers clapped wildly. Janet began to clap as well, but Brad grabbed her hands and made her stop.
JANET'S GOT THE CLAP AND NOW BRAD'S GOT IT TOO!
Magenta and Columbia grabbed a hold of the cloth revealing a giant tank with a mummy-like figure inside..
MAGENTA IS UP AT BAT....NO BALLS, NO HITS, NO TITS EITHER!
FRANK, HOW DO YOU SAY FUCK YOU IN CHINESE?
"Up now! Throw open the switches on the sonic oscillator..." Frank ordered Riff Raff,
OSCILLATOR?! I JUST MET HER!
"..... and step the reactor power input THREE MORE POINTS! "
Riff Raff threw a really big switch and three triangles lit up red as the power rose.
THREE! MORE! DORITOS!
" Oh, Brad!" Janet cried, near hysterical as the tank began to glow and the lights went out.
HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE, BRAD?
"It's all right, Janet." Brad said stalwartly putting his arm around his woman.
A SIX-FOOT SELF-INSERTING TAMPON WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED.
A chandelier-like object lowered from the ceiling directly above the tank, and Frankie turned different knobs with great effort dripping different colored liquids into the tank below.
RED! ORANGE! YELLOW! GREEN! BLUE! PURPLE! MORE GREEN!
The audience shouted as Frankie turned each knob.
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
IS IT SOUP YET?
NOT YET!
FUCK IT! LET'S NUKE THE BASTARD!
The figure in the tank suddenly became skeletal.
OH LOOK! ROCKY'S FIRST BONER!
A hand with only four fingers reached out and grabbed the edge of the tank.
THROW HIM BACK! HE;S ONLY GOT FOUR FINGERS!
the figure mumbled something incomprehensible. He removed the bandages from his head to reveal a handsome blonde young man.
Frank lunged for the creature and cried out, " Oh! Rocky!"
Rocky grabbed a hold of the chandelier as it rose up, and so evaded Frankie's ardent embrace. Frankie raced over to Riff Raff who was winding the chandelier and kicked him hard. " The sword of Damocles is hanging over my head, And I've got the feeling someone's gonna be cutting the thread." Riff Raff began to lower the chandelier once more. "Oh, woe is me, my life is a misery. Oh, can't you see, that I'm at the start of a pretty big downer."
Frankie lunged for Rocky once more, but missed and fell into the tank, as rocky let go of the chandelier and landed between Magenta and Columbia who began to cut off his bandages. When they were done, rocky was standing in a pair of Gold Lame short shorts and very little else. Snape watched the events onscreen in Horror. "I'm in love with Malfoy!?"
Hermione winced. "Yes, Sir."
"Malfoy!"
"Yes, sir."
Snape commenced to hyperventilate very rapidly and Hermione guided his head between his knees and frantically instructed him to breathe deeply. Draco for his part was torn between bouts of hysterical laughter and tears of horror.
"I have to wear that!?"
"Yes, Draco."
"That!"
"Yes Draco."
"But they're so tiny! And Gold!"
"Yes, Draco."
"I'll be cold!"
"Draco, right now, cold is the lest of your worries."
"I'm trying to pointedly ignore that until I can get sufficiently drunk to handle that, Potter, now shut your hole!"
"Well, there's is a bar in the lobby.."
Meanwhile, back onscreen, rocky had finished his song and dance number and had finally been caught by a very persistent Frank.
"Well really." Frank said,
NO, FRANKLY!
"......That's no way to behave on your first day out."
OF THE CLOSET!
Rocky sat just behind a ladder, and it framed him rather like a prison cell.
IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, BEAT YOUR BARS, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, BEAT YOUR BARS, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT, AND YOU REALLY WANT TO SHOW IT, IF YOU'RE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT BEAT YOUR BARS.
Rocky beat the bars of the ladder and made sounds like a forlorn puppy.
" But since you're such an exceptional beauty, I am prepared to forgive you." Frankie relented, fawning over Rocky's golden thighs.
"Ugh, Ugh" Rocky grunted, clapping like a child. The audience clapped right along with him.
"Oh, I just love success!" Frankie gushed, clasping his hands together.
YOU LOVE ANYTHING WITH A 'SUCK' IN IT!
"He's a credit to your genius, master." Riff Raff intoned.
"Yes." Frankie glowed with praise.
Magenta followed, "A triumph of your will!"
Frank said louder, "Yes."
Columbia looked at Rocky, resting her arms, (and most of her breasts0 on the side of the tank. "He's OK!"
YOU BLEW IT, YOU BITCH!
Frank looked at her disbelievingly. "OK?!"
KILL THE ROACH!
Frank smacked Columbia on the arm, causing her to back off of the tank.
GET YOUR TITS OFF MY TANK!
"O.K.! I think we can do better than that. Humph!" He flounced away from her.
ASK KEN AND BARBIE!
"Well, Brad and Janet, what do you think of him?
LIE THROUGH YOUR TEETH, BITCH!
Janet faltered, for a moment, looking at brad before answering, "Well, I don't like men with too many muscles."
JUST ONE BIG ONE!
"I didn't make him... FOR YOU!" Frank said impudently.
YEAH, BUT SHE GETS HIM ANYWAY!
"Please tell me it doesn't get any worse." Snap pleaded Hermione
"You do get to axe murder Neville in a second." She said hopefully.
Neville's eyes began to bulge out of his head and he crouched very low in his seat.
Snape grinned a feral grin. "At least there's something to look forward to. And after that?"
"Well..." Hermione hesitated, thinking of the seduction scenes.
Snape observed her hesitation and the strange look on her face and read it as an ill omen. "I'm Afraid."
"You bloody should be." She agreed, ribbing his back consolingly.
DUM DUM DUUUUUUUUUUUUM!
Next Chapter: Whatever happened to Saturday night? Featuring Delivery Boy! Neville. Axe Murderer! Frankie! Confetti galore and Frankie and Rocky say "I do!" Egads! Thank you and enjoy the show.
Be kind. Review.
