The Funeral

Chapter 2, Post 1

Leia Solo tried not to seem nervous as she approached the Falcon. She told me she'd face Han herself but I couldn't leave her alone. I decided to follow her and to sit quietly in my claw craft with the speakers on so I could hear what they were saying.

Han grunted, coming down the Falcon's ramp with a box of miscellaneous tools. He saw Leia, turned around and set the tools aside, facing her again.

"Han, we need to talk. It's about Jaina," Leia started. She paused briefly and turned. I shrieked, dodging my head as she looked around the bay. She knew I was there, her Jedi instincts told her I was there. Leia shook her head, looking at her husband again.

Han wiped his greasy hands, tossing the towel aside as he walked over and sat on some crates. "What about Jaina? Is she in trouble?"

"No, she's not in trouble. Actually, what I have to tell you is more about her relationship with Jagged Fel."

Han immediately stood up, towering over Leia, "Has he hurt her?"

"No, he hasn't hurt her," Leia retorted, "Why would he hurt Jaina? He loves her...and their love has grown a lot since they first met."

"It's been hard to ignore that part," he mumbled, then looked straight at her, "Wait a minute. Leia, what exactly are you saying?"

She smiled, "Jaina's pregnant!"

Han stood there for a moment, staring at his wife. He glanced down at his holster and patted his gun. "Stay here. I'll be right back," he mused, bypassing her, not even acknowledging her presence.

Leia frowned, racing after her husband as he calmly left the bay. As she head for the door, I pulled her aside. She glared at me, rolling her eyes, "Jag, what are you doing here? I told you I was going to handle Han myself."

I shrugged, "I know but I wanted to be here if things got out of hand."

"Well,you better make yourself scarce again because Han wants your head!"

tbc

The Funeral

Chapter 2, Post 2

By obi's girl

"Jag, what are you doing here?" Jaina cried as I slipped through the door. Jaina had to know, she deserved to know what happened. "You know my father is looking for you, right?" She knew already? Did Leia stop by and warn her? Maybe it's a Jedi thing.

I shrugged, "I know, that's why I had to see you. I stopped by your parents earlier. I wanted to talk to Han personally about our little situation."

Jaina breathed hard, nervously shaking her head. "No, no, no! Jag, tell me you he wasn't there? Was he there?"

"No, he wasn't," I murmured, "But your mother was. She thought I'd come over to ask Han for you hand --- but then I told her you were pregnant and Leia decided to talk to your father herself," I paused quietly, looking into her brown eyes for answers. "Jaina, are you angry with me?"

I wanted to touch her face, but it seemed like she wasn't even there. Her mind was somewhere else. I bent my head down, slowly touching her chin with my hand. Finally, she looked at me and smiled, "I'm sorry if I zoned out on you there.I just, you want to merry me?"

I smiled, bent down further and kissed her forehead, "Marriage usually comes before a family, but we lucked out in that area. Jaina Solo, will you be my wife?"

"I don't know what to say; everything is happening so quickly." she cried, reaching up and touching my face, "I'm almost scared. Jag, what if tomorrow never comes.I don't want to lose you."

I wanted so much to kiss away her pain but all I could offer her was my embrace. I shrugged, holding her in my arms as I stroked her hair. I watched the small brown strands glide through my fingers. Her heartbeat was so calm --- I wished I could use the Force to hear my child's heartbeat. She was real; my angel was real. "Jaina, you'll never loose me. I swear it. My life, my destiny is with you. This child is our life now, you are my life now."

"You've become my life too, Jag," she whispered, "Jag, our lives have always been connected by the Force.And now we're even more connected than before because of our daughter." Jaina smiled, "Yes, I will marry you."

tbc The Funeral

Chapter 2, Post 3

By obi's girl

With the hilt of the lightsaber slapping against his thigh, Jagged Fel paced himself as he walked to Luke's quarters. At the funeral, he didn't want to talk about Jaina's death with anyone but a few minutes ago, he'd almost killed himself to end his own pain. He needed to talk to Luke. Jag stopped, staring at the door. Was he ready to talk about what happened to her? Jag wasn't sure, but he was certain he couldn't deal with the grief on his own.

Jag didn't even remember touching the com pad as he stared back at the Jedi Master. Luke stood there, still in dressed in black "I didn't know it was tradition for Jedi Masters to wear black days after a Jedi burial," he whispered.

Luke shrugged, "I think meditation is a more of a traditional way of dealing with grief but this seems more appropriate," he paused, "You want to talk?"

"I need to talk."

~~

"I know I'm not a Jedi," Jag started as Mara settled down on the couch with 2-year-old Ben, "But I still feel her, like 'it' didn't even happen. Does that make sense?"

Mara shrugged, "It's natural to feel that way, Jag," she started, "It's human nature to deny that something never happened when it actually did, so we can still hold onto the memories of those passed."

Jag nodded, "No, it's so much more than that.I saw her. It happened after the funeral when I wanted to be alone to grieve."

Mara was about to say something else but felt she couldn't. The family had already been through so much, loosing Jaina just made things more clear that all of them were susceptible to death, and no one was safe. She frowned, glancing at her husband.

Luke huffed, remembering Ben Kenobi appear to him shortly after he died. Seeing ghosts of lost Jedi wasn't strange. For Jedi, it was the norm but Luke felt there was more to Jaina's visit. "What did she say to you?"

"She said all the things I didn't want to hear - that it wasn't my fault and that I needed to move on," he grunted, "But how can I move on with all that I've lost? I've not only lost Jaina but I lost our daughter, the daughter I'll never know. How am I supposed to get over that?"

"Jag," Mara started, "Let me tell you something. Ben, my son, almost wasn't born because of the disease created by the Vong. I was in remission because of Vergere's tears but after I ran out, I began to make the tears myself. It proved disastrous later because my body rejected the tears, threatening Ben's life."

Luke smiled, "But I held onto to the both of them because I wasn't willing to gain a son but lose a wife. I couldn't lose Mara or Ben - so we joined together. With our combined strength, Ben was born."

"Master Luke, Jaina was only 10 months pregnant. She couldn't go through what you described. The baby wasn't mature yet.."

He nodded, "We know, but what we're saying is."

"What my husband is trying to say is, maybe the reason you were spared and not Jaina is because you were meant for something else, that your destiny lies somewhere else."

"You're saying I wasn't destined to live my life with Jaina? That I wasn't right for her and that maybe I should just leave and return to Chiss? Is that what you're saying?" Jag cried.

"No Jag, that's not what we're saying," Luke answered, "You and Jaina loved each other very deeply. The Force agreed and gave you a child but what we're saying is that maybe you were left behind for another purpose."

Jag nodded, "So Jaina shot down instead of me because the Force has greater plans for me? It's a stupid plan, whatever it is because the one person that should be here isn't," he shouted, "I need to go."

Mara handed Ben to Luke, standing up as Jag stalked to the door, "Jag wait, there's someone you should meet tomorrow. She's a grief counselor; her name is Celeste Raven. She'll be in the pilot's lounge."

Tbc

The Funeral

Chapter 2, Post 4

By obi's girl

When I was a younger man, marriage, children and a family was the farthest thing from my mind. I dreamt about commanding my own squadron and doing what I could to keep the galaxy safe. Every night before going to bed, my mother would tell me a story about the Republic and sometimes about my Uncle Wedge.

She would always pause a moment, thinking about him.the fact that she left him without really getting the chance to know him still haunted her.

She blamed herself for leaving him but never talked very much about him but Jag knew she missed him. It wasn't until I was older, in my twenties that she began to think about writing to him.

Syal Antilles has been in the Republic only one time in her life and it was very brief, a matter of months. She'd fallen in love with my father and they left the Republic and moved to Chiss. My siblings and I weren't born yet but over time, pieces of her past fell into place. When my father attended the academy, he was friends with Han Solo and Uncle Wedge was a good friend of Luke Skywalker.

Now, I was engaged to the niece of Luke Skywalker and daughter of Han Solo. I smiled and then frowned, technically I wasn't an official part of the Skywalker/Solo line but they had become my family, too.

"What are you thinking?" Jaina asked as she rested her head on my chest.

I shrugged, "I was just --- how did you manage growing up?" Jaina lifted her head and looked at me curiously, "I mean, the name. Your family, they were heroes of the Republic. They were legends long before you and your brothers were born. I was just wandering, how you were able to deal with that?"

"Definitely a lot of pressure. I know there was a lot of pressure on mom because she was continuing the family line.They'd already gone through so much.I guess, as kids, Jacen, Anakin and I never really worried about it too much. We never let it bother us. We were kids, Jag - but as we grew up, of course, it became more important. And with war going on, everyone expected us to become the new heroes of the next generation."

"We're not a rich family, Jag but very well-known. It gets kinda bothersome sometimes because the media scrutinizes everything we do, especially when Jacen, Anakin and I were younger.why are you curious about this?"

I shrugged, "I'm going to be a part of this family now. There's going to be a lot of expectations of me."

Jaina smiled and kissed my forehead, "Don't worry about it, Jag. Don't worry about what will be expected of you, just be you."

I was about to say something but someone COM'd the door. Jaina moaned, standing up and walked to the door. She checked the ID. Her eyes suddenly widened as she turned to me.

I stared at her for a moment before Jaina rushed from the door, grabbed my arm and pushed me towards her closet. "Sorry honey, but this is for your own good..."

"Wait a minute, Jaina. Who is it?" I cried, I actually had a feeling whom it was but I needed to hear it from her.

"No time," she mused as she twirled around, facing her father. I gulped, staring back at Han Solo. He growled, staring back at me, his hands dangling over his holster. I glanced at Jaina and huffed.

A moment later, Leia arrived, short of breath. Jaina glanced at me, smiled and then walked towards her father. "Dad, what are you doing here?"

What was she doing? She knew why he was there? My frown deepened as I watched Jaina. She seemed to innocent, well, was trying to play innocent. Leia looked at me and shrugged, she tried to reason with him but he left her, looking for me.

"I know, Jaina.I know everything," he whispered, glaring at me again.

Jaina shrugged, "What are you talking about, dad?"

Han smiled, laughing a bit, crossing his arms, "What am I talking about? Jaina, don't play games with me. I know you're pregnant and Fel's the reason for it!" Leia stepped forward, lightly grabbing hold of his arm. He glared at her too but she didn't back down, "You're going to defend him too?"

"Han, this is ridiculous! You knew Jag and Jaina were serious, I don't know why this new revelation is such a big deal.He's not abandoning her. In fact, he wants to merry her!" Leia boasted but frowned when she realized saying that probably wasn't the best coarse of action.

Han raised a finger to my face, "You better merry her, Fel and make her happy 'cuz if she's not happy, I'm not happy and then you'll have to deal with me."

I frowned, glancing at Jaina. Twisted around, it sounded like Han had given me his blessing, although he probably meant for it to scare me. Jaina realized this too and smiled, locking her arm through mine. "He will make me happy, dad and if he doesn't, you don't have to deal with him.I will." She nudged me in the stomach and I smiled, bracing her shoulder.

We both hugged each other, smiling like idiots. Han stood there for a moment, staring at us and then backed down, straightening his jacket. He looked at Leia, she was trying not to smile but she couldn't help it. "All right, all right Fel. Welcome to the family, I guess."

Han smiled himself, but it was forced. Leia hit his stomach and Han brought his hand up, extending it to me. I glanced at Jaina; she only smiled, wanting me to take his hand. I shrugged, gripping it firmly. We both smiled at each other and then Han let go.

"Well, I guess I can call you 'dad' now, huh?" I laughed as his strained smile suddenly turned into a frown. "Or not."

Tbc

The Funeral

Chapter 2, Post 5

Celeste Raven tried to keep a straight face as she walked into the famed "Rogues & Wraith" pilot lounge. Always stuck in her office, this was one of the few times Celeste had been able to leave to counsel a patient. The military required her to stay on base and work from their medical facility but after she heard about Fel's case, she begged her boss to let her leave the office so she could do her work. Finally, after a time, he let her go.

Celeste wrinkled her nose, life was certainly different from being stuck behind a desk.

She'd heard about Jaina Solo's death via HoloNet news from a counsel in the building in which she worked. Every day she would pass it and glance at it but this was the one time, the news grabbed her attention. She knew about the Skywalker/Solo family; she'd heard that Han and Leia had lost both their sons earlier on in the war. Jaina, their daughter was their last child.

Celeste tried to get hold of the family but they remained quiet, except for Mara Jade Skywalker, Jaina's aunt. Mara accepted her invitation to talk. She told her Celeste mostly about Jagged Fel, her niece's fiancé. Even though he was born on Chiss and trained to control his emotions, like a Jedi, he really didn't know how to deal with his own grief and Mara suggested to her that she meet with him.

Now, Celeste was sitting at the bar, waiting to meet with Jagged Fel. She huffed, turning to the bartender, "Excuse me bartender, I'm looking for Colonel Jagged Fel."

He shrugged, "A lot of pilots come through here, ma'am. It's hard to keep track of all of them, but I'm sure if you ask around, you'll find him."

Celeste smiled, "Thank you," and turned away from the bar. "Well, this should be interesting if not fun," she mused.

"Excuse me," a voice asked. Celeste turned to her right, facing a man with black hair and dark eyes. "You're looking for Jagged Fel?"

"Yes, I am. Are you...?"

He smiled, "No, but Jag's my nephew. I'm Wedge Antilles."

"Celeste Raven, grief counselor. Tell me, do you know where your nephew is?"

Wedge shrugged, "Probably debating on whether if he should show...You said you're a grief counselor? Would you mind if I talk to you while you wait?"

"No, not at all."

Wedge smiled, fingering his glass, "I need to talk to someone..." He gestured to his drink, "I figured it was better to drink my sorrows away, but I found it really hasn't been helping much," he paused, "I'd known Jaina since she was a little baby. I knew her brothers, too. They'd always get into so much trouble...Even when they were small, it was easy to tell what they would become later in life. Jaina, she loved to fly. It was her dream to fly with the Rogue Squadron."

"It's all right,"

"She was so happy when she became a member...that's when she met Jag. He wasn't with the squadron but his squadron saved her and some pilots from some skips. They had a special connection then, a love that carried through all these years."

Celeste frowned and sat back, "I'm sorry, but you said she was a part of the Rogue Squadron. I thought she was a part of the Twin Suns squadron?"

"She was a member of both squadrons. In the beginning of the war, she was with the Rogues but after her brothers' died, she left the Rogues...and there was all that goddess stuff and given command of her own squadron."

"Oh," she mumbled and then looked up at him again, "I also heard she was pregnant. Was that true?"

"She was," Jag answered, confronting Celeste and his Uncle, "You're Celeste Raven?"

She smiled, "Yes, I am. Sorry but I was looking for you and your Uncle happened to be sitting next to me," Celeste turned to Wedge, "If you want to talk some more, leave your apartment number and I'll drop by when I have the chance."

"That would be good," Wedge replied, grabbing a pen from his pocket and a napkin, scribbling his number and building name. As he stood, Wedge looked at his nephew and smiled. "Ya know, it would be good for you to stop by sometime and see your cousins."

Jag didn't reply, ignoring him. Wedge frowned again, looking at Celeste and left.

"So, you have cousins. How old are they?" Celeste ventured as he sat down.

Jag shrugged, "Ten and twelve, I think. Wedge named one his daughters after my mother, his sister, Syal Antilles."

Celeste smiled, "You ever visit them?" she asked.

"I did once after I arrived on Coruscant for the first time. Wedge invited me over for dinner and afterwards, I got to play with his two girls."

"I have two nieces. They're older now, 16 and 21. But when they were younger, they were soo cute and..."

"No offense doc, but what is this?" Jag interrupted.

Celeste frowned, "I find it easier to relate to my patients if I know a little something about them..."

"No, I mean this. Shouldn't you be asking me questions or telling me how to deal with my grief?"

Celeste nodded, smirking a bit, "Jag, I am counseling you. I just wanted to get a feel for what type of family guy you are,"

Jag shrugged, "Before the funeral, not many people knew she was pregnant. Her parents and Uncle know, but no one else. We both figured it would be safer if less people knew."

Celeste smiled, leaning forward, "What was she like? Jaina, what was she like?"

"Stubborn," Jag grunted and then laughed, "Funny, that's the first thing I would say about her, considering I loved her very much. But she was stubborn."

"It's not bad to admit a negative quality about a loved one passed away," Celeste whispered, "Sometimes it's better to get the negative out of the way first. That way, it'll be easier later."

He shrugged, "I suppose so." Jag huffed, looking at Celeste, really looked at her. She was very beautiful, dark shoulder-length brown hair and dark blue eyes. She looked like she could have been in her early twenties but nowhere near her thirties.

"Jag, are you listening to me?" Celeste's voice broke through his reverie.

"Sorry Celeste...ya know what, can we continue this therapy session later? I'm kinda out of it."

She smiled, "Sure. Of course."

tbc