A/N: Hey all Lookie, the insanity continues! This is my New Year's gift to all the people that actually bothered to read this piece of crap and enjoied it! Thank you all for reviewing. ::starts pouting:: Of course, it's sad. I've gotten more reviews on the first chapter of this than I have on any of the chappies of my other stories. Are you people trying to tell me something? I really wish people would r&r my other fics.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or it's related characters or situations and such. We all know who does. :points to J.K. and Warner Bros. and Scholastic and all those other people who deserve credit (or think they do) too:: I also do not own the Rocky Horror Picture Show or South Park (of which there are references to in this), so don't sue! If you do, I've got a $25 Gift Certificate to Walden's Books and bus fare, but that's it.

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Harry Potter and the Horrible, Awful, Terrible, Atrocious, Ghastly, Repulsive, Very Bad Plot!

By: Liz Swarthy!

Chapter Two: Pink Tutus and Time Warp Dancing Aliens!

After the Teletubbie incident, Snape was meaner than ever. But anyway, Harry and Draco made a bet. Harry said the Chudley Cannons would win their next game and Draco overheard him and decided to have a bit of fun and bet Harry that the Chudley Cannons would loose. Harry accepted the bet. If Harry lost, then he would have to suck up to Snape for a week, hugging him at the begging and end of each day, and then, at the end of the week, he would have to kiss Snape (on the lips! ::kissing noises heard in the background:: AHA!) in front of the Great Hall during dinner. Fortunately, for Harry anyway, fate was on his side and the Cannons won. Now, for Draco's half of the bet. Draco came into the Great Hall the next morning after he had shaved his legs (A/N: smooth and no nicks!) wearing sparkly pink nylons, pink ballet slippers, a pink tutu, fairy wings and a tiara and shouted out, "I LOVE FLOWERS! SAVE THE WHALES!" He skipped to the head of the hall with a streamer trailing behind him. When he reached the head table, he hung the streamer around a very amused Dumbledore's neck. Then Draco skipped to the Slytherin table and calmly sat down as if nothing had happened.

Harry walked over to where Draco was sitting and patted him on the head.

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The next day, Harry and Draco bet on the Cannons again. This time, Harry said they would loose and Draco said they would win. Harry's part of the bet remained the same. Draco's, on the other hand, got worse. And, of course, for some strange twisted reason that no one really knows, the Cannons lost.

Draco hugged his robes close and marched up to the head of the hall to do his part of the bet, grumbling about it being sheer dumb luck. No one even noticed the clicking of a pair of sparkly high heels on his feet or the fact that he was an inch and a half taller. He turned around to face the hall, getting many questioning glances, and silently vowed that if he ever got the chance, he would tie Harry to a slab of stone with strips of wet leather, whip him, flick vinegar, lemon juice and salt onto his wounds, and the whip him again, and then more lemon juice..

He started to sing.

"How do you do, I See you've met my Faithful handyman. He's just a little brought down Because when you knocked He thought you were the candy man.

Don't get strung out by the way I look. Don't judge a book be its cover."

He tore the robed off the reveal a corset, sparkly nylons and the sparkly heels. There were many gasps, many thoughts that Draco had finally gone insane, quite a few ooh's and aww's from both the boys and the girls, and one, rather loud, "By Merlin! Look at the butt! Tightness!" That was from Professor Flitwick. Draco ignored this and the singing continued.

"I'm not much of a man by the light of day But by night I'm one hell of a lover.

I'm a just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania.

Let me show you around Maybe play you a sound. You look like you're both pretty groovy. Or if you want something visual That's not too abysmal, We could take in an old Steve Reeves Movie.

So you got caught with a flat, Well, how 'bout that? Well, babies, don't you panic. By the light of the night it'll all seem all right. I'll get you a satanic mechanic.

I'm just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania.

Why don't you stay for the night? Or maybe a bite? I could show you my favorite obsession. I've been making a man With blond hair and a tan And he's good for relieving my... tension.

I'm just a sweet transvestite From Transsexual, Transylvania."

The song ended. Draco knelt down, picked up his robes, threw them on to many 'no's' and walked from the hall as if nothing had happened. The only person that followed him was an unnoticed and very stunned Snape. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Snape followed Draco stealthily down the corridors until they ended up in a room in the dungeons. Draco quickly changed, give the peeping Snape some nice eye candy, (A/N: Damn. I wish I was there right now..) and then sat down on a couch near the left wall. Snape stepped into the room, still unnoticed. He cleared his throat. Draco jumped to his feet. "How long have you been standing there?" Draco asked angrily.

"Long enough," Snape said calmly.

"For what?" Draco asked angrily.

"To see," Snape said calmly.

"See what?" Draco asked angrily.

"You," Snape said calmly.

"Me?" Draco said angrily.

"Yes," Snape said calmly.

"Why?" Draco asked angrily.

"Because, I wanted to," Snape said calmly.

"Well, you can't do that! I'm a student damn it!" Draco said, stamping his foot down.

"Whatever, whatever, I do what I want," Snape said. "Besides, your being a student never stopped you or me before."

"That's beyond the point," Draco said, stomping out of the room.

Snape shrugged and climbed up the ladder that just suddenly appeared and disappeared somewhere.

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The next day, nothing from the past two days (or anything since the begging of the chappie) had happened. Why? Nobody knows. It's one of them unsolved mysteries. :Twilight Zone theme plays:: Snape and Draco made up and went to 'talk' in Snape's office and the didn't emerge at all for the rest of the day. Harry, Ron and Hermione wanted to make a bet with Draco over the Chudley Cannons' next game, but they didn't get the chance because he was still no where to be found. Every one thought he was still 'talking' with Snape, but when they saw Snape at breakfast and no Draco, they started to wonder. They asked Snape where Draco was and he snapped at them for being so worried about him and told them that he didn't know where Draco was.

They soon found out that aliens that were all fans of the Rocky Horror Picture Show and were dancing around singing the Time Warp had abducted Draco. Harry, Ron and Hermione decided to save him and Snape went with them. They were all beamed up to the space ship by some guy named Johnny and found out that Draco was having the time of his life because he liked the Rocky Horror Picture Show, too. They all dragged him back to earth and the aliens left and were never seen again.

The next day, everything that hadn't happened had now happened again. Why? Nobody knows. ::Twilight Zone theme plays:: Draco was now no longer a fan of the Rocky Horror Picture Show and would never liked it again, Snape now had a new found liking of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Harry died of laughter. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Well, that's the end of this chappie! Hope you liked it! Please review so that the madness can continue! And if you don't review, the madness will continue, only it will be sent directly to you! You think I won't be able to find you if you don't review? Well, you're wrong! I know who you are! Why? Nobody knows. ::Twilight Zone theme plays::

Oh, yes, and aliens do sing the Time Warp. I know, I've seen them. They're all tall and multi-colored 'cause they forgot to separate themselves from the whites.