Yu-Gi-Oh!

Charming Pharaoh

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CHAPTER ONE - COMING TO AMERICA

People milled about the courtyard of Lothian castle in England, admiring the beauty of the stone structure. These people were common people, yes, but not dressed common; at least compared to the era from which the castle was known for. These people were dressed in shirts and slacks - all of them, even the women and young boys. One young boy in particular was wearing shorts and a sports cap with a shabby old book bag slung over his shoulder, and an exceedingly bored look on his face. He wanted to go home, and not to the fancy hotel his mom had booked but the apartment he lived in on the Upper East Side.

Stopping a moment, the boy looked about, trying to find some havoc he could cause. He spotted it in the form of two frogs lying fast asleep on a fountain nearby. One of them stirred as he approached, waking up slowly. The frog turned to him and gave a small hop of surprise; the other one was still snoring away. The frog that was awake opened its mouth as if it was going to say something, but the boy did not give it the chance. He grabbed the frog and stuffed it in his book bag, before grabbing the other one and doing the same.

"Eric!" the boy's mother called. "Eric, what are you doing?"

"Nothing, mom," Eric replied, hastily re-tying the strap on his bag and snapping the flap closed. He swung the bag over his shoulder before rejoining his mother, who was about to enter the castle along with the rest of the tour group.

With that, events at the tourist trap that Lothian castle had become returned to normal. Well, at least as normal as things were in the year 2014.

~.oOOo.~

Days passed like hours in that book bag, and soon it was in a New York taxicab along with its owner and his mother. Eric was poking at the bag lazily with the fake sword souvenir he had gotten from that dumb old castle, when the strap accidentally came undone. Before he knew what was happening, the two frogs he had captured were hopping about the cab like mad. His mother screamed, and the cab came to a screeching halt long enough for her to throw the two disgusting creatures out.

The frogs looked about in shock at their new surroundings... that was until another taxicab passed by overhead and gave them the idea that they should get off of the street. The larger, brownish frog managed to make it to the safety of the sidewalk easily enough, but the smaller tri-colored one was not so lucky. Something pink and sticky had gotten stuck on its foot, and no matter how hard it tried, he could not break the hold the substance had on him.

Suddenly, a clopping of horse hooves distracted the frog, and it looked up to see a horse heading straight for it. It held up its arms, as if pleading with the horse to stop. Spooked, the horse reared up, surprising the person that had been at the reigns in the carriage behind it.

"Whoa, Terrance, whoa!"

The frog tried to look up and see who was trying to steady the horse. The voice sounded slightly masculine, with a bit of femininity and child-like innocence mixed in. From the position it was at, however, it just could not see past the horse, which was slowly calming down. The person swung down from the carriage once the horse was calm enough, and the frog just stared.

The boy - for he did not seem to be older than a teenager - was lithe of build, a bit on the short side, and angelic in appearance. Large amethyst eyes looked down at the frog in surprise, before the boy knelt down and picked it up. He smiled gently, giving the frog a little tap on the nose.

"You're a cute little thing, aren't you?" he asked.

The frog croaked. The boy giggled, before bringing the frog up as if he were going to kiss it...

A horrendous noise suddenly pierced the air. "Hey, princess, move it!"

The boy pulled away, his expression suddenly turning sour. "I may be gay, but these jokes are getting old," he muttered under his breath, before bending around slightly to see a man behind him leaning outside of his car window. "That's YUGI to you! Now go around like a normal human being!"

The man let out a curse before going back into his car and maneuvering it around the carriage. The boy, Yugi, walked over to a grassy area and set the frog down, much to its frustration. Before he went back to his carriage, he took out a strange black box from his jacket and pointed it at the frog. There was a click, and Yugi smiled at the frog again before leaving.

The frog stared after the boy for a long moment, as its companion hopped over to him. The brown frog opened its mouth, and actually SPOKE.

"Maiden's kiss, your highness!" the frog exclaimed in an English accent. "MAIDEN'S KISS!" it continued, pounding the other frog on the head with each syllable. "Men do not qualify as 'maidens'."

The tri-colored frog stood up on its hind legs, trying to get his last look at Yugi before his carriage disappeared around the corner.

"Are you listening to me?!" the other frog continued.

"Yes, yes, Seto," the frog replied, crouching back on his legs. "I can't help it though. He was cute."

"Bah!" Seto exclaimed, starting to hop toward a nearby lake. "He just had a pretty face, like everyone else you've been attracted to, Panseru."

Panseru frowned, following his companion. "So I got a little out of control every now and then -"

"Every now and then?" Seto replied, whirling on him. "This 'every now and then' thing has made me spend the past five thousand years trapped in the body of a FROG! And I didn't even DO anything!"

The prince winced. "Well, it could be worse... we could be dogs?"

Seto gave him a withering glance before continuing hopping away. Panseru followed him slowly, looking around as he made his way, following the crystal clear lake around. There were various people scattered about, dressed similarly to the ones he had become familiar with at the castle. Beyond the tall blades of grass were various trees, making him come to the conclusion they were in a forest of some sort. Some people meandered about, so it must have been a public place. One of those people walked over the two of them, knocking over a bottle of something almost right on top of Seto.

"Seto, are you all right?" Panseru asked, hopping over to his companion. Seto rubbed the top of his head, relieved, as he watched a fine red substance glug out of the bottle.

"That was close," he muttered. "What is this stuff anyway?"

Panseru jumped up on top of the bottle to read the contents. "Wine!" he exclaimed. "This will cheer you right up, Seto!"

"Are you sure it's safe?" the priest-in-training asked. "Ra knows how long it's been out here."

A smile split Panseru's face. "Well, there's only one way to find out."

~.oOOo.~

Yugi Mutou, loaded down with the day's grocery shopping, arrived late that night at the New York City apartment he shared with his friends Ryou Bakura and Bakura. He managed to make his way blindly to the kitchen and set the various bags in his arms down before the one almost ripped. Then, he made his way back to the coat rack, taking of his jacket while shouting for his roommates. Something crunched under foot, and he looked down to see something silver.

"Not again," he muttered, picking up the pair of handcuffs and stalking over to the living room. His two white-haired, almost identical roommates were sitting on the couch, arms around each other, watching television innocently.

Ryou noticed him first. "Oh, hi, Yugi!" he exclaimed cheerily. "How was work?"

"Just dandy," Yugi replied, before throwing the cuffs at the two of them. "Apparently you two had a nice day as well."

"Ah, it was just the usual," Bakura replied flippantly, getting a sweatdrop out of Ryou. "You know, the usual whipping -"

"I DON'T need details," Yugi interrupted, getting a snicker out of him. Bakura stood up and stretched then.

"Ah, don't worry, Yugi. Maybe we'll have a threesome one day," he said, before giving Ryou a quick peck on the cheek. "Later, lover. I've gotta go to work."

With that, Bakura grabbed his coat and went off to his job as the night guard of the local bank. Ryou watched as he left, a bit of a dreamy look on his face.

"He's the best, isn't he?" he asked.

Yugi rolled his eyes. "Sure... if you like having sex with yourself."

Ryou frowned, then got up and followed him as he made his way back to the kitchen. Yugi started putting away the groceries with the white-haired man's help.

"You're just jealous, Yugi," he said, storing the bread away.

Yugi sighed. "Twenty-five years old and still no boyfriend? Damn right I'm jealous."

"You're just still upset over Jonouchi," Ryou replied in a sort of patronizing voice. "I know the way you think. Honestly, I thought he was gay too. It looks like even the best of us can be fooled."

Yugi raised an eyebrow in amusement. "Don't flatter yourself, Ryou."

The other man laughed. "Don't let it get to you so much, Yugi. There's someone out there for everyone, even if they just happen to look alike."

~.oOOo.~

The breezes blew lazily in Central Park that night, but if one listened closely, they could make out the minute sound of drunken singing coming from the lake. Panseru and Seto had drunken their fill of the wine, which in their current state was not much, and were trying their very hardest to let the whole world know about it. They had found a discarded toy boat and were drifting along the shoreline at a snail's pace.

"You know, Setooooo," Panseru drawled. "I do believe, that this... place, has had a good effect on us."

"Are you sure that's not just the wine?" Seto asked. He had always been able to hold his alcohol better than the prince could, even as a frog.

"Meh, the jury's still out on that one," he replied, before collapsing into a fit of giggles. "I feel it, Seto! Tonight is the night we become human again!"

Seto groaned; not this AGAIN. "Your highness, need I remind you that you've been saying that for the past one million, eight hundred forty thousand nights? Give or take a few. In case you haven't noticed: we're still frogs."

Before Panseru could retaliate, there came the sound of screeching wheels. The two of them looked up to see a long white car sitting on a dirt path in a cloud of fading dust. In the next instant, a woman with fair blonde hair that cascaded about her shoulders and dressed in a pink and gold trimmed gown that looked like something out of the Middle Ages emerged from the back of the vehicle. In the next instant, a gentleman with much wilder blonde hair and shabby clothes emerged and chased after her.

"Mai!" the gentleman shouted. "Mai! Where are you going?"

"Away from YOU, Katsuya Jonouchi," the woman replied rather indignantly. "I'm OBVIOUSLY not needed."

Jonouchi sighed in frustration. "What are you talking about, Mai? Of course you're needed!"

Mai whirled on him. "Oh really? Needed to play your darling Juliet?" she demanded. "Why don't you get that harlot, Anzu, to do the role!"

The man rolled his eyes as she started to stalk off again. "Don't be such a prima-dona, Mai..." he muttered, before giving chase once more. "Look, I've known Anzu since before I can remember. We're just FRIENDS!"

"Oh, sure," Mai replied dryly. "She's a much younger friend."

Jonouchi grabbed her by the arm, spinning her about. "Is that what this is about?" he asked. "Is this because of that damned article?"

"Well it must be right!" she exclaimed. "I must be nothing but an old, washed up has-been!"

Jonouchi cupped her face in his hands. "Mai... Mai, sweet Mai... You are still as beautiful and as youthful as the first time we met back in Duelist Kingdom."

At the pond, Seto nudged Panseru. "Kingdom! They must be royalty!"

"If that's the case, then why wont you marry me?" she asked, oblivious to the other observers of the conversation.

"Marriage is for the little people," Jonouchi replied casually. "At least this way I can still call you my queen."

Seto was practically hopping in delight. "Queen!" he exclaimed. "That's it, your highness! She's royalty!"

"So?" Panseru replied, the wine still settling in.

The priest frowned at him, before pushing the prince overboard. He came back up sputtering; nothing like a dip in a cold lake to get you sobered up REALLY fast. Seto pointed to where the man and the woman were standing, now hand in hand.

"Get over there and get yourself kissed!" he ordered. "NOW!!!"

Not about to argue, Panseru managed to swim to shore, before hopping his way as fast as he could through the grass to get to Jonouchi and Mai. He stopped at their feet and croaked as loud as he could, hoping to get noticed. To his misfortune, however, it was Jonouchi that noticed him first. The man knelt down and picked the prince frog up, holding him up between himself and the lovely woman.

"Mai, even if you looked as ugly as this frog, I'd still love you all the same," Jonouchi said, looking deep into the woman's eyes.

"I beg your pardon!" Panseru exclaimed, but all the two humans could hear was a loud croak.

"Would you kiss it?" Mai asked slyly.

Jonouchi made a face, but brought the frog closer to kiss it anyway. Panseru scrambled about, trying desperately to get away from the man's lips.

"No offense, but you're not my type!" he exclaimed. "I don't like blonde suck-ups!"

After a moment, Jonouchi gave up, much to Mai's delight.

"You can't do it, can you?" she asked, taking the frog in her hands. "Well, I can. Whether it be frog, or prince, or king; I will kiss it gladly."

With that, she proved it, giving Panseru a quick peck on the head right in between his eyes. She then tossed him over her shoulder, hardly noticing the frog had started glowing, even when he landed in the water with quite a loud splash. Mai took Jonouchi's hands in hers, leading him back to the limo.

~.oOOo.~

The white limousine was long gone by the time the young man emerged from the water. His spiked, tri-colored hair was drooping slightly from being wet, and he was gulping in air desperately. A fairly large, upside down pyramidal talisman hung about his neck, glittering in the moonlight. He looked about, narrow amethyst eyes taking in the new view hungrily, while his tanned skin seemed to glow golden. His baggy white pants were stained slightly with sand and the mud from the lake, and his purple cloak hung listlessly about his shoulders, thoroughly soaked liked the rest of him.

He looked about, suddenly realizing something. "Seto? Seto! Where are you?"

As if on cue, a loud splash erupted behind him, and a slightly older young man dressed in priest's robes surfaced from the water. The priest's turban was all askew, revealing a mop of brown and black streaked hair underneath. He blinked up at the other young man, light blue eyes twinkling.

"Well, I do believe you've finally done it, your highness," Seto said, standing up on his own two legs again with a little help. "There's only one problem: where's the Lady Mai?"

Panseru looked about, trying to find the white limo or its two passengers. No one was there; the park was completely deserted.

"Dammit all," he muttered. "I don't believe this..."

"What are the chances we'll be able to find her again?" Seto asked.

Panseru looked about. From his new vantage point, he was able to see various tall towers, so high that it seemed like they were reaching for the heavens themselves.

The prince sighed. "I'm guessing zero to none?"