The DragonBall Z Show: The Reunion (Remastered)

DISCLAIMER: I don't own DBZ.. or Dr. Slump.. or a car.. or my own house. I do own a pretty cool CD collection, though.. and a kickass guitar.

SETUP/WARNING: Okay, it's been five years since DB ended and now the old gang is gathering for a reunion at Kame House. Please understand, this is a parody, not meant to be taken seriously at all. Got it? Parody.

The Old gang (Bulma, Kuririn, Master Roshi, and Oolong) was sitting around Roshi's kitchen table. They were waiting for an old friend. In the five years since the 23rd Tenkaichi Budokai he hadn't kept in touch with any of them.

"Well, he said he was gonna be here," said Kuririn in an attempt to break the uncomfortable silence. Almost as soon as he had said that, the front door to the Kame House fell down and in he walked... Son Goku!

"Hi guys, sorry I'm late," he said as if he didn't just break down Master Roshi's door.

"FUCK, GOKU," shouted an obviously p.o.'ed Master Roshi, "OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR NEXT TIME, YA FUCKER!"

"I missed you too, Master Roshi," Goku said in a non-sarcastic manner.

"FUCK OFF!" retorted Roshi.

"Hey, Goku!" said Kuririn, whom was excited about seeing his best friend again.

"Oh, hey, Kuririn," responded Goku. "I see you're still bald, noseless, just over four feet tall, and overall repulsive to women!" he added; making an even bigger ass of himself.

"Yeah, *sniff*, thanks for reminding me," said a now depressed Kuririn, to which Goku responded with "No problem" while patting his friend's head.

"Hey Goku! Long time no see," exclaimed Oolong. Goku turned to face his old friend and said... "BABE! I mean, GORDY! I mean, PORKY! I mean, WILBUR!"

Oolong just frowned, folded his arms, and muttered "Ass."

"I mean, GATCHAN!"

"Son!" said a teary-eyed Bulma as she looked at the man she had known longer than anyone else in the room.

Goku immediately turned to look at her and said, "Hey, Bloomers! Say, you sure got hot!" the now disgusted Bulma replied with, "Uh, thanks... Goku."

Just then, a certain someone peeked from behind Goku's leg. Bulma saw him and said, "Oh, wow, Son. I didn't know you had a... well... son!"

Goku stopped daydreaming about macaroni upon hearing Bulma, and responded with, "Oh yeah, his name's Son Gohan! I named him after my dead Grandpa! He's four years old now!"

"Hey there, little fella," said Bulma as she bent over in order to make eye contact with the child. Kuririn, whom was standing behind her, added, "Hey, Gohan, nice to meet you!"

"He's alive because I had sex with Chi Chi!" said Goku out of nowhere. A once again disgusted Bulma responded with, "Uh, yeah, Goku. We all kinda figured that." (Kuririn just kinda gave him a my-god-I-can't-believe-you- just-said-that-type look).

"No, it was pretty cool! First, we both took our clothes off..." he continued.

"We know..." sighed Bulma.

"Then we kissed and caressed each other, and remember the other tail I had? Y'know, the bald one..."

"We get it, Goku..."

"But then, y'know what I did with the bald tail, or actually, y'know what one of the things I did with..."

"OKAY, SON! WE GET IT!"

"Really? How? Where you there, Bulma?"

"NO!"

Just then, Piccolo stuck his head in through where the door used to be and said, "Hi guys."

"IT'S HIM!" screamed Bulma and Kuririn at the sight of the Demon Lord. Master Roshi simply said, "He's a dumb fuck!"

After Bulma and Kuririn hid behind him, Goku looked at his old foe and said, "Hi! My name is Son Goku!"

Piccolo then walked up to Goku and said, "I know who you are! Don't you remember me!? We fought at the end of the DragonBall series!"

Goku thought for a couple of seconds and then said, "Reich Pilaf?"

"NO!" screamed the demon, feeling insulted.

"... Jackie Chun?"

"NO!"

"... Taopaipai?"

"NO!"

"...... Freeza?"

"THAT HASN'T EVEN HAPPENED YET!"

"VCR! I mean, Oh yeah!"

"VCR!? How do you confuse that with 'Oh yeah'!?"

"... James Garner! I mean, I don't know!"

Piccolo then put his hand on his forehead, shook his head, sighed and said, "This is gonna be looong adventure."

Goku then put his arm over Piccolo's shoulder and said, "Ah, now, don't you mean 'this is gonna is gonna be a brown adventure'?" Piccolo just frowned.

"C'mon everybody, Group hug!" said Goku as he forced everyone into a group hug. "You too, Master Roshi!"

"Fuck you!"

"Pocket calculator! I mean, oh Master Roshi!"

THEND

A word from the cast about 'making' Reunion:

PICCOLO: "My thoughts on making Reunion, eh? Well, let's see, Goku annoyed me, Roshi kept saying fuck, Oolong smelt like shit, and Showtime kept making cracks about me being the same color as marijuana! What do think my thoughts on it are!? I hated it!!! I STILL don't know what the hell makes me keep coming back to do more cartoons!!!

GOKU: When I was a kid, I saw a fish. Then, 20 years later, I saw another fish. They were different colors so I think they were the same mountain goat! (Piccolo groans in the background) the best thing about making Reunion was when I got to think about macaroni! The worst part was that there was no Taco Bell, and I really really wanted Taco Bell that day!... Welp, I'm going to Taco Bell! (Goku leaves via walking through the wall; Piccolo picks up a bat and beats himself with it)

MASTER ROSHI: "One fucking day, I fucking got this fucking call from some redneck fucker calling himself Showtime. He fucking said, 'I fucking want your fucking ass to be in a fucking cartoon'. My first fucking response was 'FUCK NO!', but then he fucking told me he would fucking pay me. So I fucking said, 'FUCK YEAH!'... That's fucking it!... That's all I fucking have to fucking say!... FUCK OFF, ALREADY!"

There ya go! Never let the laughter die and DON'T vote Bush in '04.