The Origins of Genjo Sanzo

DISCLAIMER: I'm not Indonesian, I'm Malaysian. Anyways: it takes 100 chimpanzees to write the works of Shakespeare but only one saru to run off with a crazy idea such as this. Which is why I don't own Saiyuki. Some strange things that came up in physics class. UltraM2000 and Gu Bak Wan to share in the inspiration for this.

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Theory 1: The Heretic Kinetic Theory

A long time ago the essence of the Earth impregnated a block of ice on Mount Kaka. At last, the ice cube broke free from the mountain's grip and fell into a nearby river.

For many long miles, the swift current carried the steadily melting cube along until it found it convenient to dump it among some tangled tree roots. The aforementioned tree, growing nearby a particular temple, where a certain Komyou Sanzo happened to be meditating.

Cube: *blurble*

Komyou: *chanting* Ommmmmmm. . . . hm? *sees cube* Ah, what have we here? *drags the cube out of the water*

The cube begins to melt and before long, a golden-haired baby boy was cooing in the stunned Sanzo's arms.

Komyou: O_O . Ah heh heh, I'd better dry you off before you catch a cold.

Baby (Kouryuu): MWAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

Komyou: My my, such beautiful golden hair. Such hair will bring you fortune, my little tot.

For the little brat--

Baby Kouryuu: *glares hard enough to bore a hole through titanium* Ga?!?!?!! *pulls out a Smith & Wesson and cocks the hammer*

--ahem, I mean the sweet child was born of the Earth, and stronger than the foundations of stone, swifter than a hurricane and as to our poor Komyou Sanzo's chagrin: smellier than Kanzeon Bosatsu's yoghurt.

Komyou: = . Urrrg. . . *holding baby Kouryuu at arm's length* we need to change your diapers, Kouryuu. Ahah! A name! River-drifter, then.

Baby (now Kouryuu): 0~0 . Goo. . . splmmrpthh *drools and opens his big violet eyes*

Komyou: ~__~ . Ai, it's going to be a long childhood. . .

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Goku: Naaaaaaa, Sanzo, you were born from an ice cube?

Sanzo: *reaches for his gun* U. Ru. Sai, saru.

Gojyo: Maybe that's why the bouzu is such a grumpy futt. He freezes his underwear.

Sanzo: =_= ......

*BANG**BANG**BANG**BANG*

Hakkai: ^_________^ . Yare yare desune.