Summary: Well, part five is finally up.  Sorry for the long wait.  Just some background info: the trial Lindsay discusses with Helen is from the episodes "The Trial" and "Cloudy With a Chance of Membranes".  It's the Dr. Jeffrey Winslow trial, which was the trial that Helen and Bobby originally broke up over.

Disclaimer: I don't' own any of these characters…blah, blah, blah.

Feedback: R/R please!  Thanks for all the wonderful comments and suggestions!

Only a Matter of Time

Part Five:

The Sole, Surviving Secret

                Helen paced nervously inside of her apartment, waiting for Bobby to arrive.  She was meeting Lindsay, Rebecca, and Ellenor at their new apartment, and Bobby offered to help them move in.  Eugene was supposed to help too, but not right away.  He had to drop Kendall off at Sharon's house and from there he was going to meet them at the apartment.

            Helen sat down, contemplating for the millionth time exactly what she was going to tell Lindsay.  Sure, Lindsay had given her the go ahead with Bobby, but had she really meant it?  Helen couldn't be certain.  It was all much too confusing.  She knew she had to tell her though, especially since she kept telling Lindsay she no longer had any interest in Bobby.  God, now she was even lying to her best friend!  This was turning into a bigger mess than she had imagined!  And to make matters worse, Bobby kept pushing her to tell Lindsay.  The sooner, the better, he insisted.  Easy for him to say!  He wasn't going to be the one doing the talking!

            Maybe it wasn't worth it.  If Lindsay liked him so much…well, maybe she shouldn't betray that friendship.  Then again, hadn't Lindsay done exactly the same thing to her…twice???  She rubbed her temples, trying to think of some great solution that would put an end to all of her worrying.  Some master plan in which no one got hurt.  She was coming up with nada.  She sighed.  This wasn't fair.  Lindsay didn't deserve any of this…hell, she didn't deserve any of this!  Why did the one thing she had going for her in her life right now have to bring about so much pain and heartache?  Couldn't she just be happy for once, god damn it!  Was that so much to ask for?  She didn't think so.  Everything had to keep snowballing until it got worse and worse…and if she kept waiting to tell Lindsay, well, who knew what would…

            "Hey."

            Helen screamed as she jumped off her chair.  She looked up relieved to see that it was only Bobby standing there.

            "My God!" she remarked.  "Don't do that!!!"

            "I tried knocking," Bobby began.  "But you didn't answer.  I tried the door, and it was unlocked.  So I came in.  What's the matter?" he asked, concern filling his eyes.  "Is everything all right?  You looked stressed, baby," he replied, taking her in his arms.

            Resting her head on his shoulder, Helen sighed.  "It's just…I really, really don't want to tell Lindsay.  I mean, I want to tell her, but, at the same time…  God, Bobby, we swore never to let a guy come between us, and now…well look at what we've gotten ourselves into.  I just…God, I wish this whole mess would just disappear."

            "I know, I know," he whispered gently.  "Do you…do you want me to try talking to her first?" he asked.

            Helen shook her head.  "No…this…this is something I have to do by myself.  If I'm not the one to tell her…she'll never trust me again.  I'm just…I'm not really sure how to break it to her."

            "You'll find a way," Bobby said, squeezing her shoulder reassuringly. 

            "Yeah," she agreed quietly as she slipped her leather jacket on.  "I guess we should start moving some of these boxes into the truck," she replied at last.  Bobby nodded and they quickly began loading the boxes onto the U-Haul waiting outside.  They talked about anything and everything…everything that is except Lindsay; neither one of them wanted to pursue that subject.

            Placing another box in back of the truck, Helen sighed, hoping that everything would turn out better than she expected.

            "Ouch!"

            "Watch it!"

            "That's my foot!"

            "Sorry!"

            "Hey!  Now you're on my foot!"

            "Then put your box down!"

            "No you!"

            "Hey, out of my way!"

            "No…"

            Ellenor, Lindsay, and Rebecca all screamed as they toppled to the floor, their boxes colliding next to them.

            "You should have put down your box," Ellenor told Lindsay.

            "No, if both of you had just moved and let me through then…" Rebecca began.

            "Then you shouldn't have stepped on my foot!" Lindsay remarked.

            "I didn't!" Rebecca insisted.

            "Don't look at me," Ellenor replied.

            "Well somebody did!" Lindsay replied.

            "No, somebody stepped on my foot!" Rebecca remarked.

            "All right, all right!" Ellenor yelled.  "Let's just pick these boxes back up and try again.  I hope there wasn't anything fragile in them…"  She and Rebecca turned to Lindsay.

            Lindsay shrugged in return.  "Don't ask me.  They're the ones Helen dropped over last night.  And if something broke, we're all…"

            "Dead," Helen finished as she and Bobby walked into the apartment.  "What happened?!"

            Rebecca pointed to Lindsay.  "She stepped on my foot then…"

            "First she stepped on my foot, then I lost my balance, but…" Lindsay began.

            "…she crashed into me, so I grabbed onto Ellenor for support, and…"

            "…I somehow managed to stay on my feet, but then Beck pulled Ellenor down and…"

            "We all fell because of Lindsay stepping on me…"

            "We all came crashing down because Beck threw me off balance…"

            "And the boxes all fell because of her!" Lindsay and Rebecca shouted at each other.

            Helen rolled her eyes and turned to Ellenor.

            "Basically, somebody stepped on somebody's foot, they fell, and the rest of us came down with her."

            "Well lucky for you guys only my clothes are in those boxes," Helen remarked as Bobby set down the box he was carrying.

            "Yeah, yeah, yeah," Lindsay muttered, rolling her eyes.  "Is anyone else starving?"

            "Yes!" everyone agreed.

            "Anyone up for pizza?" Ellenor asked.  "I'll go get one."

            "I'll go with her," Rebecca agreed.  "I need a break anyway.  So what…two large pies, one plain…one with…?"

            "Pepperoni," Helen suggested.

            "Got it," Rebecca replied. 

            "Be back in a few," Ellenor called as she and Rebecca left.

            Bobby turned to Helen and she knew that now was the time to tell Lindsay.  Sighing, she nodded at him and turned to Lindsay who was looking very confused.

            "Hey, Linds, we uh…we need to talk," Helen finally blurted out.

            "About?" she asked.

            "About uh…" Helen began.

            "Just mainly about something that's been bothering Helen and I for a few days and…" Bobby started.

            "Oh, hell, might as well say it," Helen remarked.  "We need to talk about us."

            "Us as in me and you?" Lindsay asked Helen, now completely baffled.

            "Us as in me…and Bobby," Helen said slowly.

            Bobby groaned.  Way to be subtle, Helen, he thought.  He rocked forward on the balls of his feet nervously.  He wished more than anything that he could just disappear right now.

            "You…and Bobby?" Lindsay repeated slowly.  "What about you and Bobby?"

            "Well…" Helen began, fidgeting nervously.

            "Maybe we should sit," Bobby suggested.

            "Good idea…"

            "No!" Lindsay remarked.  "I want to know right now."

            Helen sighed.  "Okay," she began slowly.  "See…Bobby and I…well, we sort of…we're back together."  She took a deep breath.  There.  That wasn't so hard.

            "Oh," Lindsay replied quickly, taken aback.  "And how long had this been going on for?"

            "Just a week," Bobby commented.

            Helen winced, angry with Bobby for being so stupid.

            "A WEEK?" Lindsay asked.  "And when exactly were you planning on telling me?"

            "Just now!" Bobby remarked.

            Helen groaned, another stupid move on Bobby's part. 

            "So you hid this for an entire week then now you drop this bomb on me, knowing full well that I can't get too angry because Ellenor and Beck will be back soon and you just…"

            "Hey Linds!" Rebecca called, reentering the room.  "Slight problem.  Neither Ell nor I can drive your car because it's stick shift and…" she paused noticing tears in Lindsay's eyes.

            "Bobby can drive you," Helen remarked quickly.

            "But…" he protested, not wanting to leave Helen all alone to deal with Lindsay.

            "Go," Helen insisted.  "It's okay, really."

            "All right but…"

            "Just go!" Lindsay snapped, causing Bobby to hurry up and chauffer Rebecca and himself out the door.

            The door shut and Lindsay glared at Helen silently.  Helen sighed.

            "Linds, I wanted to tell you…you have to believe me.  I just couldn't find a good time or…or the words and…well…babe, I'm sorry, but I just…I…I…it's not like you haven't done this to me!  Twice need I remind you!"

            Lindsay nodded.  "I know, I just…this is a lot to take in…you…you and Bobby are really back together?"

            "Yes," said Helen.

            "Even after he told you what he said the night of the Winslow trial?" Lindsay asked in surprise.

            "Ye…uh…wait…what did he say?" asked Helen curiously.

            Lindsay shook her head.  "I shouldn't tell you.  I just would have thought he'd at least have the decency to do so."

            "Linds," Helen persisted.

            "You shouldn't hear it from me," she insisted.

            "What did he do?  We were both angry, Lindsay.  I'm sure whatever was said was spoken out of that anger," maintained Helen.

            "Okay," said Lindsay, forcing a smile.  "Than just forget it, okay?"

            Helen sighed.  "Just tell me."

            "No, I…well…okay," Lindsay replied, taking a deep breath.  "He said…that night, when we were at the crime scene…once I saw that woman and the scattered hands…I…I told him that he should put a little distance between himself and that case.  He, of course, refused.  So, I…I asked him if he was really ready to throw someone he loved away for a stupid case and…he said yes.  He…he told me that Winslow came to him because he thought Bobby was the best…and…he said that meant more to him than…"

            "It would help if you grabbed the right keys!" Bobby scolded Rebecca, as the two barged back into the apartment.  "Your car keys certainly aren't going to help us much if your car's not here!"

            "Oh, shut up and get them!" Rebecca remarked, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes.  "I'm going back outside to wait with Ellenor!"

            Bobby turned to Helen and Lindsay cautiously.  "Are you okay?" he asked Lindsay.

            She nodded, looking away from him.  He raised an eyebrow in query, surprised that Lindsay was taking things this well.  He shot Helen a reassuring smile and for the first time, noticed the odd way she had looked at him.  It was the same look that he usually reserved for his cold-blooded, murdering clients.

            "Helen…are you…" he began slowly.

            "Fine," she snapped.

            Bobby was taken aback.  What was going on?  Lindsay was supposed to be the one getting upset, not Helen.  What had happened while he was gone?

            "Honey, what's wrong?" he asked, reaching out for her hand.

            "Don't touch me!" Helen spat, her voice hardly raised above a whisper.  Her eyes were narrowed and cold.  He didn't understand…why was she acting this way?

            "Wh…what…" Bobby started.

            "I can't look at you," she remarked, turning from him and rushing out the door.  Bobby stared after her, too shocked to move.  What was going on?  He'd have thought Lindsay would be the one to storm out, not Helen.  He turned to Lindsay accusingly, waiting for her to explain.

            "What?" Lindsay asked innocently, having a seat on the couch.

            "What the hell did you do?" he asked, as calmly as he could.

            "I didn't do anything!  And I'm surprised that you'd think I could just…"

            "Lindsay!" he asked, half desperately and half furiously.

            "I just…I was mainly surprised when Helen told me you two were back together and…I figured that this time there wouldn't be any secrets or lies.  So, I…I assumed Helen knew about the night…the Winslow Trial…when I asked you if you were really willing to throw someone you love away for a trial and you said…"

            "Damn it Lindsay!" he roared, banging his fist down on the countertop.  "What the hell were you thinking?!"

            "I was thinking that I was doing a friend a favor!" she yelled back.  "She deserved to know Bobby."

            "That's not what you were doing and you know it!" he barked.  "You just had to think of a reason, any reason, to make Helen mad at me.  That way if she was angry enough and we couldn't work things out, we couldn't get back together and…"

            "How dare you accuse me of doing all this to make my best friend unhappy and…" Lindsay started, rising to her feet.

            "Damn right I am!  You had no right to go and…" Bobby began.

            "Bobby, are you com…" Rebecca stopped eyeing Bobby and Lindsay's livid faces.  "Umm…are you guys all right?"  She peered around.  "Where's Helen?"

            Bobby ignored her as he walked quickly through the open doorway.  He rushed down the steps two at a time, stopping when he saw Ellenor, leaning against the car, looking extremely annoyed.

            "Well, finally!" she remarked.  "It's taken you long enough.  I was starting to wonder if…"

            "Have you seen Helen?" he interrupted.        

            She shook her head.  "Not since I came down here."

            Where the hell was she?  The U-Haul was still here, as Bobby thought, he couldn't picture Helen driving the U-Haul away anyway.  She must have gone out the back way and called a taxi.  It was the only explanation Bobby could make sense of. 

            Running down the street, he yelled out to a cab ready to pass him.  The driver finally stopped and Bobby rambled off Helen's address to him.  He sat impatiently, hoping that he could figure out a way to make this up to Helen.  He could only imagine how furious she must be with him.  If only she knew…

            "Damn it!" he muttered, as the cab driver dropped him off.  Helen's car was missing.  She was gone.  He sat on the steps to her apartment in frustration.  Come on Helen, he pleaded mentally.  Where are you?

TBC…please R/R!