Chapter 9: Reality



The next day was spent mostly in leisure. Ron and Hermione had visited him again, with Ginny, Fred and George in tow. Ron was especially excited that Harry would be allowed back in the dorm room the next day.

Crabbe and Goyle also made an appearance, a little later in the afternoon.

Not surprisingly, their pile of chocolates and candies had lessened considerably by the time the two left the room.

Later at night, after everyone had left, they were both in their own beds; neither tired enough to go to sleep just yet.

Harry wasn't sure exactly how the conversation started but pretty soon, he was pouring his heart out to Draco, telling him about his life with the Dursleys and how he spent most of it being bullied by his much larger cousin, and ignored by his aunt and uncle.

"Can I ask you something?" Draco interrupted while Harry was in the middle of his description of the closet under the stairs.

"Of course."

"Why haven't you killed them yet?" he asked matter-of-factly as he looked over to Harry.

Harry was too stunned to answer and took a few seconds to find his voice.

"Draco, they're my family. Besides that would be a little extreme, wouldn't it?" he asked warily.

Draco just shrugged as if to say it wouldn't be to him.

"You frighten me sometimes." Harry joked to cover up his discomfort "But I guess we just grew up differently . . .What was yours like?" he asked a little hesitantly. Draco had been a little quiet most of the day.

"My what like?"

"Childhood, I guess."

"Oh. It was perfectly normal. Ordinary. You'd be bored." He waved a hand in dismissal.

"Draco, I grew up with Muggles, I assure you I won't be bored by anything you have to say."

"Well, if you insist." he paused, scrunching up his face to think, "Father wasn't around much, neither was Mother. He was always busy with work and she had her social obligations." He paused and thought that Harry probably wouldn't know what he was talking about.

"Parties." He clarified, before continuing. "I saw more of the house-elves than my parents; growing up. But I always had a proper nanny around to take care of me. Eventhough Mother and Father didn't have much time to spend with me, they still made sure I was raised properly."

"Erm, so to you . . . that's normal?"

"Well, yes." Draco looked at Harry in confusion.

"Ah. Just checking."

Both lay in silence after this, mulling over all that had been said so far.

It was Harry that broke the silence after several minutes. He had something on his mind that he just had to say out loud.

"Draco?" he asked softly, hoping the other boy wasn't asleep yet. They'd both been lying silent in the darkness for quite a while.

"Hmm?"

"Are we friends now?"

Silence.

*Bloody hell.* Draco groaned inwardly. *Damn this Potter. How in hell does he manage to ask the hardest questions so easily?*

"Gryffindors." He muttered under his breath, shaking his head.

"What was that?" Harry asked.

"Nothing. What made you ask such a question anyway?" Draco asked, still annoyed with Harry's straight-forwardness.

"You seriously need me to answer that? Things between us haven't exactly been normal here, you know."

"I suppose. . ." Draco gave in grudgingly. *Why can't he just keep his mouth shut? Everything was just fine before.*

"Well?" Harry sat up, feeling a little impatient.

"Well what?"

"What the hell is this?" referring to their relationship.

"Harry, you know this whole honesty thing? It's over-rated." As he said this, his mind guiltily flickered back to the fateful match. He still hadn't told Harry the truth of what he did. All day long he'd been going over in his mind how to do it, and every time, he came up with the same ending.

Harry would hate him. He'd be disgusted. *No, the truth would just have to stay buried.* he had decided finally.

"Sometimes I forget that you're still a Slytherin." Harry said bitterly, stung by Draco's indifference.

"What did you want to hear, Harry? Huh? You want me to say we could be friends? That I'd walk next to you to classes starting tomorrow? Joke with you in the Halls, pretend I like your pathetic friends?" he spat out angrily.

"Shut. Up." Harry said slowly. He was trembling.

Draco ignored this and continued. He had to.

When Crabbe and Goyle had showed up this afternoon to visit him, he'd had to pretend to ignore Harry so as not to let Crabbe and Goyle suspect anything. Their mere presence had made reality come flooding back harshly to Draco's mind. Him and Potter?

His two friends wouldn't understand. Couldn't. And neither would his Father or any of the other Slytherins.

"Look, maybe we could do that while we're still here. Be nice to each other. There's no one around to judge us. But out there. . ." he paused. "Out there, it's a different story. And if you don't realise that, well then you're an even bigger fool than I thought you were."

Silence.

In the darkness, Harry tried to gather up what pride he had left and say as levelly as possible.

"You're absolutely right, Malfoy. I wasn't thinking." He said, as large tears rolled down his face silently in the darkness.

Draco finally stopped. Shocked out of his tirade when he heard Harry call him by his last name again.

*I'm sorry, Harry. This had to be done.*