WAITING IN VAIN
By Augurey
THREE: LEAVING THE BURROW
Harry had been wandering about the Burrow for some time now, searching for something to do. All the time spent together in such a large family tended to bring about a need for separation. Everyone had gone off to their respective rooms to talk privately or just spend some time with less than ten people in one room at a time.
Though he enjoyed being around Ron and Hermione, they seemed a lot less focused on anything but themselves. Seeing his best friends being so in love seemed right, and was very refreshing for him. Being the third wheel was not.
He had slipped out of Ron's room very quietly, so as not to disturb them. They hardly had realized he was there. As he headed downstairs, he took each step slowly. He figured taking his time would increase his chances of finding someone in the Weasley's living room. Once he hit the lower step, his smile grew.
The fire was crackling loudly, reflecting a large amount of flickering light on the otherwise dimly lit room. To his delight, he realized there was no one here, and he could sit peacefully in front of the fire by his self. He didn't mind being around other people, there was a certain set he'd rather avoid now.
As he settled himself on one of the fluffy couch in front of the fire, he looked around, and was surprised to see something wedged between the cushions. When he pulled it out, he glanced at it curiously. It looked to be an old, leather-bound book, in a deep red color, the pages almost spilled out from it. A single golden ribbon was wrapped around it, and tied in a little bow on the side.
Harry was not usually the type to go around reading people's things, but this time, he was intrigued. He came around and sat down, grabbing a pillow from a nearby chair. Once he found himself comfortable, he slowly picked it up. He couldn't yet tell what kind of a book it was.
The second he opened up the first page, he was well aware of its contents. Ginny had scribbled her name on it, and underlined it several times. Her signature was loopy and large, as if she'd written it thousands of times. At the bottom of the page, there was an inscription:
Secrets, stories, and dreams. it said.
Harry felt horrible as he turned the first page and was immersed in her writing. He didn't stop until he was shaken back into reality. He realised that they had several similar dreams. He couldn't keep reading, not without talking to her first.
He slammed the book shut, carefully placed it back in between the cushions as he'd found it, and leaned back against the chair he was sitting in. He felt as though he could watch the fire for hours.
* * * *
Ginny was exhausted. It was her last night in the Burrow, and she had spent much of the day following Bill's two-year-old daughter around the garden while she happily chased little garden gnomes. When she finally got little Molly to bed, she was ready to sleep for another century. She didn't figure she would have that luxury.
Ginny felt as if she might collapse all at once when her foot hit the bottom step. She paid little attention to her surroundings as she walked towards the blazing fire, and fell onto the couch. She didn't realise until quite a few minutes later that there was someone else with her. It was Harry. He had found a few blankets and a smaller pillow and squished into the corner of the couch, he didn't look very comfortable at all.
For a few moments she weighed her options. She could leave him there, or wake him up. It wasn't very hard to make a choice; it was more an issue of just reaching out to wake him.
Moments later, her hand finally touched his shoulder, and just as it did, he jumped. He sat up quickly, facing Ginny, startled for only a few moments. When he realised it was only Ginny, he let out a huge sigh of relief.
Bad dream?
Oh my, yes, spoke Harry sleepily as he adjusted his glasses.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you.
Harry seemed to open his mouth to continue, paused, and then began again. No, you didn't frighten me, it's all right. I was just... it's only that... well I give up!
With those words, Harry fell back onto the couch, fumbled for a pillow and placed it over his face. For a moment, Ginny was afraid to say anything, so she looked at the fire, which now seemed to be dying. She quickly pulled out her wand and pointed it at the fire, muttering at the glowing-red pile of smoldering sticks, which immediate burst into roaring flames.
It was then that Harry took the pillow from his face. He glanced at the fire, and then at Ginny. His seemed was showing a large variety of mixed emotions that Ginny was incapable of reading.
I think we should talk, said Harry. He pulled himself up and began searching for something. I found...this... Harry mumbled a little, and then suddenly set before Ginny something she did not expect to see.
That's... that's my journal! She gaped at him for a few seconds. Where did you find that?
In the couch, he began slowly, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to invade your privacy. You see it didn't occur to me at the time that it might be something I wasn't meant to look at. It wasn't labeled, so I opened it...
He handed her the journal open to a specific page. She took it in her hands and began to scan the page.
She began to read. November 5 - Last night I woke up at 2:30 in the morning, screaming. It was unclear to me at first, and then suddenly my nightmare came back to me. I was standing in the middle of the Chamber of Secrets, and Harry was there. He seemed to be quite upset about something, pointing and yelling at someone, who turned out to be Tom Riddle. Tom was standing a distance away, a calm look about his face. He was ignoring Harry and his words. And all at once a few things happened...
Harry, did you read all of this?
I stopped after the next part. I had to, I felt terrible. I'm sorry, he lowered his head.
Ginny didn't know how she felt. Something was lingering in the back of her mind. It was an idea she had always had about Harry. It's okay, she said finally. Don't apologize. I'm glad you read it. Especially since there are other things in there I'd rather you not read.
He gave Ginny a quiet, half smile. Do you have dreams like that often?
All the time.
I was afraid of that, he said grimly. During Hogwarts, so many things happened that influenced me and my life. It all ended up in a jumble, you know?
Ginny was unsure of where he was headed with this statement, but she shook her head, understanding him to an extent.
When it comes down to it, I'd expect to have nightmares all the time. I always thought these things would haunt me for the rest of my life. But they stopped. For a few years I didn't have any dreams. And when they came back, they were all like this. He pointed to the page, a creepy shadow over his eyes.
I don't understand, said Ginny, half expecting Harry to explain everything to her.
But he didn't, he just shook his head slowly. Neither do I.
So much for resolving that issue, said Ginny, while she rolled her eyes. For a moment they both sat in silence, not exactly looking directly at one another. Harry, do you like America?
Not particularly, he sighed, I don't think it's that bad, I just know I'm not where I'm supposed to be. Haven't you ever felt that way?
What way?
You know you aren't where you're supposed to be. I can feel it, it's quite awkward.
I do know, said Ginny, not in the same way. Why don't you leave?
I don't think I can. I have a contract...
If you did leave, would you still play Quidditch?
Harry seemed to have to think about this for quite some time. All you could hear was the crackling fire, and the wind coming against the Burrow.
No, I don't think so, he resolved. I don't know what I would do!
I'm sorry, I shouldn't ask so many questions, said Ginny.
No, please, I don't mind. It's nice to have someone to talk to, he smiled. No one else really has time these days, you know. Ron and Hermione, always so busy. Hermione used to spend hours just talking to me. She has other things to do now.
Ginny tensed up at the mention of Hermione. She loved her like a sister most of the time, but she found that she was somewhat jealous. It had been building up for years. Ever since Hermione was Head Girl at Hogwarts. She had half the school drooling over her. All the boys liked her, and all the girls wanted to be her. Now she was grown up, sophisticated, and happily engaged. Everything was always good for her.
Hermione thinks you're brilliant, said Ginny.
Harry only smiled and nodded, Hermione always believed in me. I think she also always knew that, although Quidditch is something I do well, it wasn't meant to be the only thing I do.
Well, what else is there? Inquired Ginny.
I never did particularly well in any subject in school, Harry began, except, of course
Defense Against the Dark Arts... they said together, not at all surprised at each other.
said Harry, exactly right.
There are a lot of things you could do with that, Ginny mentioned. Become an Auror!
Harry shook his head, no, I don't think that's such a great idea.
Have you spoken with Dumbledore recently? Ginny paused, and waited for Harry to answer, but he just looked at her, so she continued, I was actually talking with Hagrid at the Leaky Cauldron, he said that they are having problems with their DADA teachers again...
I got an owl from Professor McGonagall a few weeks ago, Harry explained, she asked me if I would be interested in teaching...
Ginny smiled brightly, Harry, maybe that's it!
Do you think I'd really be good at teaching? I don't know if I could do it.
I know you would be, Harry, you're perfect for the job. And you'd be at Hogwarts, Harry, Hogwarts! It's just where you want to be, isn't it? Isn't it?
Harry was suddenly very amused by her enthusiasm. It is. You're right, Ginny, it's exactly where I want to be.
Think about it, okay? Think about it, and promise me you'll let me know what you decide, all right?
I promise, Harry laughed, as long as you promise me you'll start filling more than magazine pages.
Ginny grinned. I don't know about that. We'll see.
Suddenly, Harry yawned. I need to get some sleep. I can't believe I'm leaving again tomorrow, and I already have a meeting in the morning.
That's terribly unfair for you, she said, feeling very sad that tomorrow would be the last day at the Burrow.
Yes, well, life is unfair, stated Harry. Ginny nodded in agreement as Harry began to stand up. Thanks, Ginny. I feel somehow better.
I'm very glad, said Ginny. Goodnight, Harry.
With that, Harry said goodnight and left Ginny alone in the living room. She felt a huge weight leave her chest, and everything seemed to have evened itself out. There was so much in her life she tended to regret, and for the first time, a conversation with Harry was not on her list.
* * * *
The next morning, the whole house was up at seven o'clock, everyone in a hurry to get things ready to go. Most of the Weasley's were preparing to leave by Floo Powder after dinner. Harry was scheduled to take a portkey back to the States around nine o'clock, and Ginny had planned to apparate back to her flat around the same time. She was anxious to be in her own bed.
They had both packed their things and were quietly sitting across from each other at the table, watching Mrs. Weasley hover around everyone, trying to get everything clean. She had charmed the dishes to clean themselves once she got them in the sink, and refused to let anyone lift a hand to do remotely anything.
Ginny, dear, have you had enough to eat? You look pale as death, said Mrs. Weasley, putting the back of her hand to Ginny's forehead. Let me make you some hot tea before you go!
No! Mum, I'll be fine, I'm just tired, that's all, Ginny had to practically yell over the many voices filling the room.
Mrs. Weasley set a cup of tea and a piece of toast in front of her anyway, patting her head. Please? For me?
Ginny rolled her eyes and took a sip of the tea, inhaling the warmth of it. Molly beamed with delight, and kissed her daughter on the top of her head before storming into the living room to scold Fred for giving Hermione a Canary Cream. (For old times sake! He had shouted while Molly pulled him up by one ear.)
Harry chuckled lightly to himself while he observed the family around him. If only things were always as they were right then. He was so content at the Burrow; he could easily say it felt like home. He wished he didn't have to leave.
The moment came only too soon. Ginny had been sipping on her tea for only fifteen minutes when her eyes suddenly widened. she squeaked, It's half past nine! You're late!
Harry jumped out of his seat and frantically searched for his wristwatch.
You won't miss anything important, will you? Mrs. Weasley asked.
Of course not, only a second away, of course. I wanted to be early. That's fine, no rush, sit down everyone, sit down, said Harry, calming the crowd. I'll just get my things.
With those words, the whole family erupted into a jumble of conversation, while Harry walked out of the room at normal pace. Ginny sighed loudly, blowing some stray strands of hair out of her face. She, too, stood up and exited the room. Harry seemed to be ready to go.
Wait, Harry, I'll walk out with you. I should be leaving now, too, she said with a smile.
Great, then, said Harry, who didn't seem the least bit anxious to leave. Ginny wondered if he'd be back home any time soon. She hoped he'd listen to her advice.
She grabbed her bag and set it on the chair beside the door. Suddenly, the rest of the family flooded in to say their good-byes. Everyone seemed keen on at least two hugs from each of the departing parties.
I'd better get an owl from you next week, Gin, Fred exclaimed, pinching her cheeks lightly.
Never mind him, George jumped in for once last hug. Owl me!
Hermione squeezed Ginny and handed her a little note. Ginny took the note with a smile and hid it inside her robes. Hermione took her hands and beamed at her. We must get together soon and talk! Ginny agreed with her, and happily hugged her one last time.
After a hug and kiss from her father, she stepped back a little and watched Harry say goodbye to Hermione and Ron. Molly found her way to Ginny and held her tightly. Oh my little girl, she sobbed. All grown up, going back to her own home, working for a big company... my, how you have grown. I'll miss you.
I'll miss you too, Mum.
Owl me when you get there!
Right, of course! Ginny took her bag and slipped towards the door, about to make a quick exit, but Molly started yelling all at once.
Oh no you don't! Don't move! She shouted.
Ginny raised an eyebrow at Harry, who was standing next to her with a look of confusion. What's wrong? Harry inquired, what's the matter?
But Molly was not frowning, only giving them knowing glances. You're underneath the mistletoe.
Go on then, Harry! Fred shouted, laughing. Give her a kiss!
Ginny went pink at this suggestion, and Harry seemed to smile nervously, while quietly glancing down at Ginny. Shall I? Right, then...
To everyone else, it was a few mere seconds. To Ginny, it felt as if it was a year. Harry turned to her slowly, and it seemed like everything was about to stop. He looked at her, as if asking for her approval, at which point she blushed furiously, and smiled. Harry leaned forward towards her, hesitant, and then for a few short seconds, their lips met. As he stepped back, everyone cheered, and they waved once more before Ginny practically flung the door wide open and found her way out.
The fresh air pushed past her in one quick burst, and she let out a long sigh as she set down her bag.
Harry began slowly.
said Ginny.
I'll talk to you soon, he said, holding out his hand to shake hers.
She looked at it, but instead of taking his hand she reached up and gave him a good hug. At first Harry seemed shocked, but put his arms around her with a smile on his face.
Send me an Owl after you've figured everything out, Ginny told him.
I will.
He grabbed the Portkey out of his pocket and waved to her one last time. he said, and moments later, he was gone.
Ginny sighed to herself, and seconds later, she disapparated.
* * * *
Ginny sat down at one of the tables outside of a little cafe on Diagon Alley. It was a cool day, and a little breeze was rustling around. She grabbed the edges of her new navy blue cloak and brought them closer together, huddling inside the warmth. Sighing, her whole body relaxed. Several days had passed since her return from the Burrow. She had spent a great deal of time dwelling on Harry's advice, and still could not make sense of her disarrayed thoughts.
She was thinking too deeply for her own good, and suddenly someone was sitting across from her. Someone wearing a deep green cloak, and his very own trademark smirk.
Draco Malfoy....
He held his hand up and nodded,
What exactly do you want?
Draco frowned, holding his hand over his heart. Why must you always greet me so unhappily, as if I vex you or something? You know, said Draco, you almost look as though you'd like me to leave.
I would like you to leave, said Ginny, her cheeks turning a bright shade of red. She crossed her arms over her chest. I'm waiting for someone.
Before Draco could even open his mouth, a short witch with bright red robes and an enchanted button popped beside them, placing a menu in front of Ginny and then Draco.
Hello, I'm Miriam, could I get you something to drink...maybe a butter beer or some hot chocolate?
I'd like a hot chocolate, please, easy on the whipped cream, said Draco.
He'd like nothing, thank you very much. I'll just have some hot tea. Ginny stubbornly shoved at Draco's arm as the plump witch just scurried off. When are you leaving?
Why do you hate me so? Why must I go? I thought you loved me?
I was young and stupid.
Two years ago?
Ginny nodded, looking away. Young and stupid.
Suddenly, Miriam was bouncing towards them with a huge grin on her face, Draco's hot chocolate spilling over the sides onto her robes. She sat down their drinks and nodded politely before walking away. Draco took a quick sip of his hot chocolate, and then gave Ginny a sharp glare.
Listen... I'm only trying to be kind. I want to be your friend, said Draco, his voice lowered, I thought I might say hi. I saw you sitting here alone, and I assumed...
You assumed?
Draco shook his head. I assumed you might like the company. Silly me, what was I thinking?
You weren't, said Ginny lightly. Off in the distance she could see the subtle shape of Hermione; her long, brown hair, deep red robes. She was managing quite a lot of packages.
He turned his head. Oh, her, said Draco, you're right. I wasn't thinking.
With those words, he stood up and moved himself three tables over, facing Ginny. She would have glared if not for the fact that Hermione looked as though she might drop everything in her hands at once. Ginny stood and took hold of as many as she cold, quickly settling them underneath their table.
she happily greeted her friend, oh it's so good to see you again!
Once all of the packages and bags had been placed safely on the ground, Hermione opened her arms and embraced Ginny enthusiastically.
Oh dear, it's quite chilly out, isn't it? Hermione asked.
Yes, it most definitely is, said Ginny. Out of the corner of her eye, she could still see Draco, his eyes were following her every move. She couldn't figure out what he was trying to do. How are you?
Very well, thank you. Hermione smiled as Miriam arrived once more to take her order, and after she had asked for a Butterbeer, she looked to Ginny with a great smile on her face. And how are you? How's work?
Oh work is work, you know. Same old thing, said Ginny, feeling sad. I'm thinking of trying something new. I'm all right other than that, of course.
Why was Malfoy sitting with you? Hermione lowered her voice when she asked this question, and Ginny leaned in a little.
He likes to pick on me, she began, ever since the incident in Paris.
Hermione made a funny sound and laughed, still bitter, is he? Can't handle the fact that you wouldn't dance with him? I still don't understand the logic...
Ginny laughed along quietly, and Draco shot her a death-glare. The truth was that Ginny had spent the better part of a year lying to her family and friends, and the incident in Paris' she was referring to was the end of a very long and bumpy relationship with Draco, whom she'd met and become friends with while visiting an old school friend in Hogsmeade.
He had changed very much since Hogwarts. After his father was killed, he and his mother lost most of their possessions, and Draco was firmly put in his place. He no longer hung under the shadow of his father, and consequentially, he had to learn how to be his own person. In the eyes of Harry, Hermione, and Ron he was never fully forgiven. In fact, most people still disliked him very much. Draco had warned her several times that they were wrong for each other, and she learned that he was right on her own.
Hermione tried to get her attention. Hello, earth to Ginny!
Sorry, I was just lost in thought, Ginny stated quietly. So, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?
I'd just like to ask a favor of you, Hermione began, you can probably guess what that favor is.
Ginny smiled, but had no idea what Hermione was talking about, What's that?
Well, I was thinking. I know I haven't seen you much since I started my new job, but of course, I've always felt quiet close to you. You know, sisterly. I can't think of anyone else I'd rather have to be my Maid of Honour. So, I was wondering if you'd like to...
Oh, Hermione, of course! Ginny took Hermione's hand and smiled, of course!
Wonderful! Oh, thank you so much!
For a while they discussed the details of the wedding, and Hermione explained that the date was still pending. Ron was almost as busy as she was, and they had to find something perfect, something that everyone could agree on.
We ended up in a huge argument on the date issue, Hermione told her. But you know how it is with Ron... a few minutes after he's done yelling he's already talking to you as if nothing's happened.
Ginny laughed, Oh Ron, he's so silly.
Hermione's face lit up, he's wonderful. For a moment they smiled at each other, and then Hermione slid out of her chair. Well, Ginny, I should be going, I have a lot of organising to do at home. But next Friday I'm going shopping for my dress. You'll come along, won't you?
I wouldn't miss that for the world! Ginny exclaimed, standing up to hug Hermione. I'll see you soon.
Hermione pulled all her bags together and charmed them all into one, and then walked away quickly. Ginny fell back into her chair and looked over at the table Draco was sitting at. Suddenly, he stood up and breezed past her, his arrogance seemed to have grown since they were together. She watched him walk away, turning back to wave one last time.
* * * *
Later that evening, Pig arrived with several articles of post. He was older now, and a very reliable owl, to say the least. She petted him softly and left some food by his perch, grasping a hold of the pile, she sat down in her favorite chair, lit the fire and began to sift through the letters.
The letter on the bottom caught her attention first. It was written in semi-sloppy handwriting, and it felt heavier than some of the others. When she opened it, it took less than a few seconds to realise who it was from. It read:
Dear Ginny,
I found it quite hard to decide what to do. I'm sure you knew though, what I would choose in the end. A few days ago, I sent an Owl off to McGonagall and I received a letter back promptly. I leave for Hogwarts in three weeks. It seems as though the answer to all my problems was right in front of my face. I was just too caught up in my own troubles to look at it straight on.
I wanted to thank you for that discussion we had. Without it, I'd still be lost. I enjoyed the time we spent at the Burrow, and I hope that you will come and visit me at Hogwarts one day. I'd love to see you again.
As you are well aware by now, I am Ron's best man. Hermione tells me she is asking you to be her Maid of Honour, and as such, I assume we will see much of each other anyway. I look forward to that.
I hope all is well with you.
Harry
His letter filled her with happiness. Harry was coming home! It was because of her that he was, too. She then realised that there was more to the letter. P.S. I've enclosed a present to you from me, to assist you in writing. Enjoy!
Ginny set the letter by her side and pulled what was left in the envelope out. It was a package of quills and special writing parchment, aptly titled Quire and Quills. Ginny took the package and jumped off her chair, making a mad dash for her desk. There she began to write a letter back to Harry. She couldn't wait to tell him all the ideas she'd gotten just from receiving such a thoughtful gift.
She felt as if she'd really done something good for the first time in years, and knew somehow that this wasn't the end of it.
Author's Note: Thanks so much to all reviewers. I will be more specific next chapter. Thanks for reading ;)
