**Author's Notes** Again I'm sorry for the long pause in between updates.
But, after only 4 years, my school finally discovered that I was using the
internet for 'un-educational' purposes. I tried to argue that
fanfiction.net consist of reading and writing and is therefor educational
but that only got me a detention on top of my account getting taken away.
DETENTION!! You have no idea how horrible that is at my school. A full two
hours of sitting up straight and staring at a clock! If you slouch or
revert your eyes the teacher makes you start your time over again! (*sigh*)
but you guys are worth it! So I'm now taking a pause from my day of Final
Fantasy video making and returning to my writing. It's all bad but I enjoy
it so in the end it doesn't matter. I would like to thank all my
reviewers!! They are the reason I don't put this story on a disk and burn
it in shame. Thank you;
-Dagger for caring enough to review twice and ask for an email update (*Mayonaka almost kisses you in happiness contains herself at the last second*).
-Purple Rose, of course, who started my love of fanfiction and came up with my pen name.
-And Ashbear, who is a truly gifted writer and I am so lucky to have her bother with my meager story. Thank You all.
AND FOR THE LAST TIME IF MY FRIENDS DON'T STOP PRANK REVIEWING ME I'M GONNA….i don't know what I'm gonna do yet but it's gonna be bad! Well, I'd like to apologize for any crude reviews you may read from this story. I'm trying to delete them but more keep showing up. (*sigh*) I guess even changing my pen name didn't help me escape them in the end.
Katie, Alyssa, Sophie, Alex, Sacha and Christine; STOP IT!!!I love you all dearly but that fact won't stop me from killing you all if this continues.
~*Chapter 8*~
Go the Distance
The first thing Squall noticed upon entry to the ballroom, to tell the truth, had been the floor.
No, it wasn't the most exciting or romantic feature of all the amazing things Selphie had done to the Quad. Long streamers of blue silk hung all around the circular room. A dinning and lounging area had been set up. Some kind of strange glow magic had been used to produce small firefly- like orbs of shimmering mist to flutter across the gigantic skylight.
But did Squall see any of this?…nooo… He couldn't keep his eyes off the stupid marble floor…it was just so shiny!
*I wonder how she does that* he wondered while observing the reflection of his feet on the glass-like surface. *Must have been one hell of a wax job*
Now some people would think Squall, the man who could care less about anything, would be the last person to think so highly of such a ridiculously simple thing as floor wax.
And those people would be right. He didn't care about the floor.
But at that moment, right before he was about to face two of his greatest challenges yet, even ripping out his own liver and eating it was seemed more appealing than proceeding further into the ball, let alone checking out the shiny marble. It was pretty cool actually if you stared at it long enough.
"Earth to Squall!" someone yelled. A hand was thrust in front of his face and began waving madly to bring him back down to earth. Zell obviously. Having his usual tantrum if you didn't pay attention to him long enough. Squall hit the hand away and turned his gaze back to his blonde friend.
"What do you want?" he snapped, clearly not in the best mood. But Zell had been prepared for this. Everyone knew how he hated parties and publicity, and this was a combination of the two.
"No need to get all PMS." Squall scowled and Zell smiled. "Just wanted to warn you that we're supposed to be over there now. They're already prepared to bitch at us for being late I can tell." He pointed to the dinning area across the room where the world leaders could be seen lounging about in their seats while some students mingled. It was time for the speeches and dinner apparently…. Coincidentally, it was also time to throw up.
"Are you okay?" Zell asked, only noticing how nervous his friend was after he had been dragged into the ball. "You're looking a little green."
Squall didn't say or do anything, fearing what would happen if he did. But luckily, he was saved by a soft female voice calling to him…
Rinoa…it had to be.
His queasiness was suddenly replaced with a desperate urge to see her face. Knowing how she would smile when she saw him. Knowing that that smile would erase all doubt in his mind. And knowing that he was going to spend the rest of his life with her.
His angel.
His Rinoa.
Squall turned to face his inquirer, fully prepared to sweep her up in his arms and never let her go. But his face fell as he laid eyes on her…
It wasn't his Angel.
It was the pain in his ass.
Quistis, looking stunning in a golden halter ensemble that looked as though it could have been painted on. Hell it probably WAS painted on.
She swiftly staggered toward him in a fashion that made obvious the many drinks she had had earlier.
She was drunk…great…he wasn't even here five minutes and already he could tell a scene was in the making. She kept her ocean blue eyes locked on his with every step that invited him to do more than just look at her body. Squall couldn't help but let loose an exasperated sigh as she neared. She was at it again.
Very un-gracefully, the blonde somehow managed to make it to the Commander without falling over.
"Ug…hi Squall…" she managed to mutter in between deep, exaggerated breaths. "I…I don't feel too good." With a smile she brought a small hand to her sweaty forehead as if to feign an upcoming fainting spell. She began to stagger before slipping and the heavily waxed floor and conveniently landing in his arms before she fell.
"Oops!...clumsy me," she laughed while leaning deeper into his warm chest, trying to absorb his scent, his feel, his passion with her every sense and completely ignoring the fact that he was trying to pry her off of him.
"Quistis maybe you should sit down" he suggested once giving up on the chance of getting away. But she wouldn't stray from her plan. If she sat down he would go to the dinner. If he went to the dinner he would see her. If he saw her then he would remember that he was in love. And if he remembered that then…she was screwed.
"Okay…oooww," she clutched her stomach in mock pain, gripping his uniform for support. "I don't feel so good. I definitely won't make it to this ceremony. Could you just bring me back to my room please." Squall raised an eyebrow questioningly. She tried to sound genuinely concerned about her health, but the slight seductive tone in her voice sent warning bells in the Commander's head.
What was she trying to do?
You could never tell with her.
"Zell will take you," he said casually, giving Zell a threatening glare once he opened his mouth to protest. That shut him up fast. Quistis' flushed face contorted into an un-mistakable look of surprise. Her plan clearly backfired. Whatever that plan was.
"Squall, I would really prefer if you…"
"Zell will do…" he interrupted sternly. "Besides, I can't be late for my speech now can I?" He moved to make his way around her but she quickly scurried to block his path. Her 'really drunk' act instantly replaced with a 'minorly drunk and desperate' one.
"NO!!" she cried shamelessly, the palms of her hands pushing against his broad shoulders. "It's you I need."
*I knew it* Squall sighed and gestured at a gaping Zell to go on without him. This was obviously gonna take a while.
He didn't need to be told twice. In a flash the blonde fighter was practically running to the dinning area, leaving the two alone. As soon as he was out of sight, Squall took one of Quistis' hands and pulled her behind a pillar so that they were hidden from view. She smiled seductively at this gesture, obviously misinterpreting his intentions.
Keeping a stern face so as to prove he wasn't falling for her act, he pushed her roughly against the cold marble wall, pinning her by her shoulders.
She was going to hear him out tonight. And then she was going to leave him alone once and for all.
"What are you doing Quistis?" he asked her, staring deep into her eyes hoping to find less disturbing answers than what he thought.
"I…I'm not doing anything" she stuttered, clearly a little frightened by the Commander's aggressive behavior.
"I'm not stupid. You above every else knows that. Now tell me what's going on?"
She suddenly became fascinated with the floor wax as she avoided his piercing eyes by staring at the ground. She had been his friend for 18 years. She had taught him all he knows about magic, guardian forces and junctioning yet she couldn't…no she WOULDN'T even explain to him something as trivial as this.
"Fine" he said, once again sidestepping her and making his way deeper into the Quad. But she held his arm, refusing to let go.
"NO!" she cried, fierce determination etched in her features. One thought drilling in her mind. *I will not loose. Especially to her.*
"Let me go Quistis."
"No!" she repeated, gripping his hand even more tightly. "I won't let you go to her!"
"And why not?"
"Isn't it obvious Squall? Have I not been forward enough after years of throwing myself at you only to be rejected over and over again?" he eyes grew wide with insanity. "Do you know how it feels Squall? Can you even imagine how painful it is not only to be ignored but to sit back and watch you so readily give yourself to the first little bitch that…"
At this Squall's eyes flashed with anger and with one swift motion, he wrenched his arm from her grasp and pointed a menacing finger at her throat. Shaking in pure rage.
"Don't EVER insult Rinoa." He warned, his voice low and threatening. "Is that clear instructor?"
That tone of his had turned many of the bravest men into nothing more than quivering masses of Jell-O. But Quistis didn't falter. She had known him too long…too well…and she was determined. Rinoa wasn't whom he was meant to be with. It was just an obsession. A sick little obsession of his that was now getting downright annoying.
"You don't scare me Squall" she stated. That was about 65% true. He did get pretty scary when it came to his 'girlfriend'. "But the way you fawn over her does disgust me."
"Well then I'm sure you won't mind if I leave you then." He turned on his heel and, once again, began to saunter toward the dining area.
She had to say something…ANYTHING! She had never lost anything in her life and her first defeat was definitely not gonna be by Rinoa.
"I love you Squall…"
At this he paused, clearly shocked by these words. The words she had never said to anyone. The words she had wanted to save till later tonight, when they were alone after an exhausting exhibition of raw passion. She would lean over and whisper them in his ear and then he would do the same.
So they came a little earlier than she planned. It still helped her accomplish her goal in the end. That was all that mattered now.
Quistis smiled as he slowly turned back around to face her, fiddling idly for something in his pocket. His eyes met her as he slowly closed the distance between them, never looking away. He didn't seem angry anymore, it was hard to tell what he was feeling now but as he finally stopped, his lips mere inches from hers, Quistis had no doubt in her mind…she had won.
But no.
As he pulled the small, round object from his pocket her head plummeted at the speed of light. This little trinket said so much;
The shattering of her heart.
The reality of her darkest fears.
And, worst of all…I confirmed defeat. Rinoa Heartilly had won again.
Squall held the diamond ring in between two fingers and shoved it in front of her face. "Do you see this Miss Trepe?" he asked assertively, waving the ring in front of her eyes. Somehow she managed a curt nod. "Do you know what it means?"
She didn't respond…she was too busy staring at the ring. It was so perfect. So beautiful. So hard to believe that Squall had chosen it. Of course he had done many stranger things when it came to Rinoa.
Walking to Esthar, jumping into space…and now accessorising.
Quistis swallowed the large lump in her throat and reached out to touch the stunning jewel, briefly brushing her hand against his in the process. He flinched and pulled away, still uncomfortable with any sort of physical contact. Rinoa hadn't really changed him. To the rest of the world he was still follow-the-orders, anti-social, in-serious-need-of-a-life Squall. And he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life.
"So you're going to ask her to marry you…fine…that doesn't change the fact that I…"
"You don't love me Quistis." He calmly interrupted her, soothed by the presence of the ring between them. Like it projected some kind of invisible barrier. "If you loved me as much as you think you do, you'd be happy for me. And you wouldn't go through all this trouble to keep us apart knowing how much it would hurt."
"This is more than just a fucking crush Squall!" she yelled, angry tears finally finding their way down her cheeks. "You're too young to get married anyway. Just give me a chance Squall. I know I can make you happy…please."
He paused…seeming to consider this, for he returned the ring to the safety of his pocket and with his rough, callused hand, he cupped her cheek, gently rubbing away any stray tears with his thumb. Quistis closed her eyes and tried to absorb his touch. Thinking that maybe this wasn't the end after all as he carefully pulled her face closer to his.
*He's going to kiss me* she thought with a smile and she licked her lips in anticipation of the moment. But his mouth never met her. He only placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, a symbol of his care for her as just a friend no matter what.
"Good night Quisty" he whispered soothingly, brushing back a few sweaty strands of hair from her face…those few words said so much. 'Go away Quistis my friend'… 'Leave now Quisty before you further embarrass yourself'… 'I don't, didn't and will never love you like I love her.' The sheer arrogance in the statement let loose the rage that she had been holding in for years.
"Dammit Squall!" she yelled, furiously slapping his hand away. "Do you really expect me to just go away so easily? Everything I have ever done has been for you! Everything I've endured was only to be with you! I love you!"
"And I don't love you."
Silence. The silence seemed to last an eternity as they stared at each other before he finally turned and left.
She didn't stop him this time. She didn't think she could have even moved if she wanted to.
He was gone…it was official…and oddly enough, she wasn't surprised.
Losing all hope and all sense of dignity, Quistis Trepe fell to her knees in the middle of the ballroom, sobbing. Not caring who saw her or what they said…suddenly not caring about anything anymore.
~*~
-Dagger for caring enough to review twice and ask for an email update (*Mayonaka almost kisses you in happiness contains herself at the last second*).
-Purple Rose, of course, who started my love of fanfiction and came up with my pen name.
-And Ashbear, who is a truly gifted writer and I am so lucky to have her bother with my meager story. Thank You all.
AND FOR THE LAST TIME IF MY FRIENDS DON'T STOP PRANK REVIEWING ME I'M GONNA….i don't know what I'm gonna do yet but it's gonna be bad! Well, I'd like to apologize for any crude reviews you may read from this story. I'm trying to delete them but more keep showing up. (*sigh*) I guess even changing my pen name didn't help me escape them in the end.
Katie, Alyssa, Sophie, Alex, Sacha and Christine; STOP IT!!!I love you all dearly but that fact won't stop me from killing you all if this continues.
~*Chapter 8*~
Go the Distance
The first thing Squall noticed upon entry to the ballroom, to tell the truth, had been the floor.
No, it wasn't the most exciting or romantic feature of all the amazing things Selphie had done to the Quad. Long streamers of blue silk hung all around the circular room. A dinning and lounging area had been set up. Some kind of strange glow magic had been used to produce small firefly- like orbs of shimmering mist to flutter across the gigantic skylight.
But did Squall see any of this?…nooo… He couldn't keep his eyes off the stupid marble floor…it was just so shiny!
*I wonder how she does that* he wondered while observing the reflection of his feet on the glass-like surface. *Must have been one hell of a wax job*
Now some people would think Squall, the man who could care less about anything, would be the last person to think so highly of such a ridiculously simple thing as floor wax.
And those people would be right. He didn't care about the floor.
But at that moment, right before he was about to face two of his greatest challenges yet, even ripping out his own liver and eating it was seemed more appealing than proceeding further into the ball, let alone checking out the shiny marble. It was pretty cool actually if you stared at it long enough.
"Earth to Squall!" someone yelled. A hand was thrust in front of his face and began waving madly to bring him back down to earth. Zell obviously. Having his usual tantrum if you didn't pay attention to him long enough. Squall hit the hand away and turned his gaze back to his blonde friend.
"What do you want?" he snapped, clearly not in the best mood. But Zell had been prepared for this. Everyone knew how he hated parties and publicity, and this was a combination of the two.
"No need to get all PMS." Squall scowled and Zell smiled. "Just wanted to warn you that we're supposed to be over there now. They're already prepared to bitch at us for being late I can tell." He pointed to the dinning area across the room where the world leaders could be seen lounging about in their seats while some students mingled. It was time for the speeches and dinner apparently…. Coincidentally, it was also time to throw up.
"Are you okay?" Zell asked, only noticing how nervous his friend was after he had been dragged into the ball. "You're looking a little green."
Squall didn't say or do anything, fearing what would happen if he did. But luckily, he was saved by a soft female voice calling to him…
Rinoa…it had to be.
His queasiness was suddenly replaced with a desperate urge to see her face. Knowing how she would smile when she saw him. Knowing that that smile would erase all doubt in his mind. And knowing that he was going to spend the rest of his life with her.
His angel.
His Rinoa.
Squall turned to face his inquirer, fully prepared to sweep her up in his arms and never let her go. But his face fell as he laid eyes on her…
It wasn't his Angel.
It was the pain in his ass.
Quistis, looking stunning in a golden halter ensemble that looked as though it could have been painted on. Hell it probably WAS painted on.
She swiftly staggered toward him in a fashion that made obvious the many drinks she had had earlier.
She was drunk…great…he wasn't even here five minutes and already he could tell a scene was in the making. She kept her ocean blue eyes locked on his with every step that invited him to do more than just look at her body. Squall couldn't help but let loose an exasperated sigh as she neared. She was at it again.
Very un-gracefully, the blonde somehow managed to make it to the Commander without falling over.
"Ug…hi Squall…" she managed to mutter in between deep, exaggerated breaths. "I…I don't feel too good." With a smile she brought a small hand to her sweaty forehead as if to feign an upcoming fainting spell. She began to stagger before slipping and the heavily waxed floor and conveniently landing in his arms before she fell.
"Oops!...clumsy me," she laughed while leaning deeper into his warm chest, trying to absorb his scent, his feel, his passion with her every sense and completely ignoring the fact that he was trying to pry her off of him.
"Quistis maybe you should sit down" he suggested once giving up on the chance of getting away. But she wouldn't stray from her plan. If she sat down he would go to the dinner. If he went to the dinner he would see her. If he saw her then he would remember that he was in love. And if he remembered that then…she was screwed.
"Okay…oooww," she clutched her stomach in mock pain, gripping his uniform for support. "I don't feel so good. I definitely won't make it to this ceremony. Could you just bring me back to my room please." Squall raised an eyebrow questioningly. She tried to sound genuinely concerned about her health, but the slight seductive tone in her voice sent warning bells in the Commander's head.
What was she trying to do?
You could never tell with her.
"Zell will take you," he said casually, giving Zell a threatening glare once he opened his mouth to protest. That shut him up fast. Quistis' flushed face contorted into an un-mistakable look of surprise. Her plan clearly backfired. Whatever that plan was.
"Squall, I would really prefer if you…"
"Zell will do…" he interrupted sternly. "Besides, I can't be late for my speech now can I?" He moved to make his way around her but she quickly scurried to block his path. Her 'really drunk' act instantly replaced with a 'minorly drunk and desperate' one.
"NO!!" she cried shamelessly, the palms of her hands pushing against his broad shoulders. "It's you I need."
*I knew it* Squall sighed and gestured at a gaping Zell to go on without him. This was obviously gonna take a while.
He didn't need to be told twice. In a flash the blonde fighter was practically running to the dinning area, leaving the two alone. As soon as he was out of sight, Squall took one of Quistis' hands and pulled her behind a pillar so that they were hidden from view. She smiled seductively at this gesture, obviously misinterpreting his intentions.
Keeping a stern face so as to prove he wasn't falling for her act, he pushed her roughly against the cold marble wall, pinning her by her shoulders.
She was going to hear him out tonight. And then she was going to leave him alone once and for all.
"What are you doing Quistis?" he asked her, staring deep into her eyes hoping to find less disturbing answers than what he thought.
"I…I'm not doing anything" she stuttered, clearly a little frightened by the Commander's aggressive behavior.
"I'm not stupid. You above every else knows that. Now tell me what's going on?"
She suddenly became fascinated with the floor wax as she avoided his piercing eyes by staring at the ground. She had been his friend for 18 years. She had taught him all he knows about magic, guardian forces and junctioning yet she couldn't…no she WOULDN'T even explain to him something as trivial as this.
"Fine" he said, once again sidestepping her and making his way deeper into the Quad. But she held his arm, refusing to let go.
"NO!" she cried, fierce determination etched in her features. One thought drilling in her mind. *I will not loose. Especially to her.*
"Let me go Quistis."
"No!" she repeated, gripping his hand even more tightly. "I won't let you go to her!"
"And why not?"
"Isn't it obvious Squall? Have I not been forward enough after years of throwing myself at you only to be rejected over and over again?" he eyes grew wide with insanity. "Do you know how it feels Squall? Can you even imagine how painful it is not only to be ignored but to sit back and watch you so readily give yourself to the first little bitch that…"
At this Squall's eyes flashed with anger and with one swift motion, he wrenched his arm from her grasp and pointed a menacing finger at her throat. Shaking in pure rage.
"Don't EVER insult Rinoa." He warned, his voice low and threatening. "Is that clear instructor?"
That tone of his had turned many of the bravest men into nothing more than quivering masses of Jell-O. But Quistis didn't falter. She had known him too long…too well…and she was determined. Rinoa wasn't whom he was meant to be with. It was just an obsession. A sick little obsession of his that was now getting downright annoying.
"You don't scare me Squall" she stated. That was about 65% true. He did get pretty scary when it came to his 'girlfriend'. "But the way you fawn over her does disgust me."
"Well then I'm sure you won't mind if I leave you then." He turned on his heel and, once again, began to saunter toward the dining area.
She had to say something…ANYTHING! She had never lost anything in her life and her first defeat was definitely not gonna be by Rinoa.
"I love you Squall…"
At this he paused, clearly shocked by these words. The words she had never said to anyone. The words she had wanted to save till later tonight, when they were alone after an exhausting exhibition of raw passion. She would lean over and whisper them in his ear and then he would do the same.
So they came a little earlier than she planned. It still helped her accomplish her goal in the end. That was all that mattered now.
Quistis smiled as he slowly turned back around to face her, fiddling idly for something in his pocket. His eyes met her as he slowly closed the distance between them, never looking away. He didn't seem angry anymore, it was hard to tell what he was feeling now but as he finally stopped, his lips mere inches from hers, Quistis had no doubt in her mind…she had won.
But no.
As he pulled the small, round object from his pocket her head plummeted at the speed of light. This little trinket said so much;
The shattering of her heart.
The reality of her darkest fears.
And, worst of all…I confirmed defeat. Rinoa Heartilly had won again.
Squall held the diamond ring in between two fingers and shoved it in front of her face. "Do you see this Miss Trepe?" he asked assertively, waving the ring in front of her eyes. Somehow she managed a curt nod. "Do you know what it means?"
She didn't respond…she was too busy staring at the ring. It was so perfect. So beautiful. So hard to believe that Squall had chosen it. Of course he had done many stranger things when it came to Rinoa.
Walking to Esthar, jumping into space…and now accessorising.
Quistis swallowed the large lump in her throat and reached out to touch the stunning jewel, briefly brushing her hand against his in the process. He flinched and pulled away, still uncomfortable with any sort of physical contact. Rinoa hadn't really changed him. To the rest of the world he was still follow-the-orders, anti-social, in-serious-need-of-a-life Squall. And he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life.
"So you're going to ask her to marry you…fine…that doesn't change the fact that I…"
"You don't love me Quistis." He calmly interrupted her, soothed by the presence of the ring between them. Like it projected some kind of invisible barrier. "If you loved me as much as you think you do, you'd be happy for me. And you wouldn't go through all this trouble to keep us apart knowing how much it would hurt."
"This is more than just a fucking crush Squall!" she yelled, angry tears finally finding their way down her cheeks. "You're too young to get married anyway. Just give me a chance Squall. I know I can make you happy…please."
He paused…seeming to consider this, for he returned the ring to the safety of his pocket and with his rough, callused hand, he cupped her cheek, gently rubbing away any stray tears with his thumb. Quistis closed her eyes and tried to absorb his touch. Thinking that maybe this wasn't the end after all as he carefully pulled her face closer to his.
*He's going to kiss me* she thought with a smile and she licked her lips in anticipation of the moment. But his mouth never met her. He only placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, a symbol of his care for her as just a friend no matter what.
"Good night Quisty" he whispered soothingly, brushing back a few sweaty strands of hair from her face…those few words said so much. 'Go away Quistis my friend'… 'Leave now Quisty before you further embarrass yourself'… 'I don't, didn't and will never love you like I love her.' The sheer arrogance in the statement let loose the rage that she had been holding in for years.
"Dammit Squall!" she yelled, furiously slapping his hand away. "Do you really expect me to just go away so easily? Everything I have ever done has been for you! Everything I've endured was only to be with you! I love you!"
"And I don't love you."
Silence. The silence seemed to last an eternity as they stared at each other before he finally turned and left.
She didn't stop him this time. She didn't think she could have even moved if she wanted to.
He was gone…it was official…and oddly enough, she wasn't surprised.
Losing all hope and all sense of dignity, Quistis Trepe fell to her knees in the middle of the ballroom, sobbing. Not caring who saw her or what they said…suddenly not caring about anything anymore.
~*~
