Let's see...
I don't own petshop of horrors etc. hell, i haven't even seen the anime OR read the manga.
Warnings: Shonen Ai, PWP (plot-what-plot), Language (cuz I'm a sweary bitch who loves the f word), pretty twisted, very strange, and might make no sense with the show since I have had virtually no exposure TO the show. Still wanna read? Well, all right then!
The Contract
The blond-haired police-man stands outside the door, gathering his courage. He is at The Petshop of Extraordinary and Exotic Creatures in Chinatown. He has been to the store so many times before, but this time is unique; there hasn't been a crime.
Leon has finally come to a conclusion about his felings for the ever androgynous Count D. He absent-mindedly brushes off his shirt while steeling himself for a confrontation... and confession.
Before he plunges in, he checks to make sure he has everything he'll need: Determination... check, dressed up a bit... check, chocolates... chocolates??? Fuck! Where did he put the chocolates?? The blond man rushes back to his car and tears through it. he DEFINITLY bought them, he remembers it so clearly!
He'd been in a rush. Once one decides to do something insane like telling their friend that they're gay and in love with them, one has to move quickly before his resolve falls apart. Leon -had- however, taken a moment off to zoom into the nearest store. Damned if he was going to see the Count without some form of chocolate or candy! He had grabbed a large pack and had sped towards the counters.
The one to twelve item counter was packed, and the woman in front of him, he counted, had at least 20 items. He was going nuts, and spend the 7 minutes in like trying to resist the urge to pull out his gun to scare everyone off. He was all ready crazy enough to be in love with a guy, why get himself arrested? He had run to the car with the chocolates....Where the HELL are they??!
He sighs, relieved, when he finds the sweets (unharmed) under the passenger side seat. Leon walks over and knocks on the door. No turning back now... The heavy wood door swings slowly open under his hand. The nervous man wanders through the dark halls before finding his way into the reception room. He immdeiatly looks to the couch where the Count usually sits... but it's empty!
Behind the seldom-used counter, she smiles, "Hello. Welcome to the Petshop of Extraordinary and Exotic Creatures. We sell dreams, love and happiness.... or something like that. I'm Jill, how can I help you?"
"JILL?!" Leon does a double, and then a -triple- take. The police woman chuckles a bit, leaning against the counter, "What are you -doing- here??"
She clamly smoothes her cheongsam, "I'm here to take care of your pet-related needs today. So, what did you come here for?" Smiling as politely as she can, she leads him to a chair. Q-chan calmly perches on her shoulder.
Quite dazed, Leon takes the seat. What the Hell is going on here? Still smiling, Jill asks, "Would you like some tea? It's a special, chinese blend."
"Yeah, I... wait, no!" Leon leaps to his feet, "Jill, stop this. What the HELL is going on!?"
Her one eye begins to twitch as her patience wanes, "Leon, what do you want?" She slowly hisses through clenched teeth.
"I came here to talk to the Count..."
The clerck clasps her hands together, "Excellent choice, sir! I have just what you want. One moment please!" Jill runs off happily, and disappears into the maze of corridors. Q-chan flutters down and perches on the arm rest of Leon's chair.
When Jill returns, still a bit too perky for the Detective's likings, She is alone. She hands a piece of parchment to her partner, "Read, and then sign on the dotted line, please."
Q-chan peeks at the page as Leon looks at the woman, "Jill, what the hell is all of this? Where's the count, and more importantly, since when do you work here? Isn't it against regulations to have a part time job?"
"Leon..." Jill growls menacingly. The babbit rushes up and hides behind Leon's head, glaring at the police woman. "READ it, and sign it; or is that too difficult for you? No more questions, all of those other thigns are unimportant."
Leon takes the quill pen that's being held out to him, and reads. This is what he sees:
The Petshop of Extraordinary and exotic Creatures
CONTRACT
Name: Count D
Species: Rare Chinese Transvestite
Sex: Androgynous
Terms of the Agreement
1. Feed at least a poun of milk chocolate a day.
2. Feed at least a half pound of chinese, herbal tea a day
3. Never expose to full moon light,
By signing this legally binding contract, I hereby declare that
I am fully responsible for the care of this Creature. The Petshop
of Extraodinary and Exotic Creatures, and any of its personel
cannot be held responsible for any acts of the creature.
Signed _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
He'll never, ever know what on Earth possessed him at this moment, but before he realized his hand had moved, he had signed the contract. Jill whisks the contract away from him, "All right, I'll go get you you're new pet."
The wicked smile on his partner's face before she left the room sent shivers down his spine.
