Author's Note: So, in our latest attempt to annoy Legolas, he's dropped off at Betelgeuse. Sorry about the lack of updating... I didn't feel like writing this, and then my computer crashed and I had to completely re-do my hard drive, which included erasing all the files on the computer, and every disk I used couldn't be used again. So...here it is again.

Disclaimer: Yeah, anything recognizable from another place belongs to the creator, owner, author, or whatever of that thing.

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The Many Adventures of Legolas The Elf

"It's not a planet, it's a star. And my name is Ford Prefect. Nice to meet you." Ford smiled in a way that made you think that he was trying to prevent choking you.

"A star? A STAR?!? How could I be on a STAR? They burn millions of miles away and are extremely hot - OW! OW! OW!" Legolas yelled in pain as he suddenly started to feel the heat of the star. Meanwhile, Ford was standing calmly next to Legolas. It was amazing how he could stand it, but then of course, Ford isn't an Elf, or a human for that matter.

"Fine then. I'll get a transport and take you somewhere else." He took out his Electronic Thumb and waited a few minutes. Suddenly, a completely orange ship stopped a few feet away from the two. But before Legolas could get on board, Ford stopped him.

"Do you have a towel?"

Legolas was too shocked to answer. He stared at Ford for not realizing, that he, the Elf with the best hair, couldn't go anywhere without the tools of perfect survival. "Of course I have a towel!!!"

Ford shrugged and got inside the ship, where they were met by Marvin the robot, you know, the guy that's always gloomy and depressed? HIM. Legolas, being very polite, said, "Hi".

"Why would you even bother to say hi to me? A ROBOT! I don't deserve a Hi." Marvin said, zooming off. Ford lead Legolas to the cockpit, where they saw Zaphod, Arthur Dent, and Trillian. All three of them said "Hi" before continuing on with their game of Scrabble. Ford and Legolas watched in silence. Right after Arthur put down his last letter of the word LONDON,

There was a terrible ghastly noise.

There was a terrible ghastly silence.


There was a terrible ghastly noise.

Suddenly Legolas found himself underneath someone who identified himself as...

AGRAJAG.

Oh no! Poor Legolas! Imagine not knowing the pain! The dratted Agrajag!

"You! You killed me on Alpha Centauri! Poked a hole in my eye! And now! I'll have my revenge!" He said, furious.

After that, no one ever heard from Legolas again.