Title: I Have Missed You
Author: DayDreamer
Email: elizden@knology.net
Rating: G
Summary: Mac receives an unexpected visitor that changes her life forever and also changes Harm's perception of a past relationship.
Chapter 3: Cousins and Siblings
Adm. Chegwidden's office
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia
Mac sat looking at the photo of her grandmother and Diane as Harry continued telling her about his family.
"Diane's death was very hard on all of us. My sister and I, my twin sister, lost both our parents when we were 18. We came from a very close family and we nurtured the same closeness in our children. My son Chase and Diane were more like brother and sister than cousins. She always spent her vacations with her parents or my family. Two weeks before her death, she and Chase went skiing together; he was the last family member to see her alive.
"Your mother told me that you had an imaginary friend when you were a child. You won't believe this, but your cousin also had an imaginary friend -- and her name was Sarah," Harry said with a smile. "When they were small, Chase would tease Diane mercilessly about 'Sarah'. But Diane never gave her up. She would argue right back that she and her little sister 'Sarah' were going to get him. 'Sarah' was very real to her and she actually didn't stop speaking of her until she was a teenager, when she left for the Academy. I don't mean that she pretended to play with 'Sarah' or set a place at the table for her as she did as a child. But what she did do was keep a diary. Instead of addressing her entries as 'Dear Diary', she always wrote 'Dear Sarah'. None of us knew that except her mother."
Mac sat in silence taking it all in. Her father loved Diane very much and obviously missed her. She wasn't sure how she felt about learning that she and Diane were related, but most of all she wondered if her father saw her as Diane's replacement. She remembered all too clearly how often Harm had discreetly watched her when she first came to JAG. She risked a glance at him now to see how he was accepting the news, but she quickly looked away. It was there on his face that he was having a hard time hearing her father speak of Diane.
As Harm listened to Harrison MacLain talk about his niece, he felt as if he were hearing of someone he had never met. Diane had never talked about her cousin who was like a brother to her. For the first time, he realized that Diane had not spoken of her family very often at all. Why, when they were obviously so close? He thought that he had known her so well, but had he really? The imaginary friend, the diary, all of that was news to him. He remembered the trip she had taken just before she died. He remembered it because he had tried to get her to agree to coming back early to spend the weekend with him. He wanted to talk to her alone, without the distraction of work.
He had been in love with Diane, had wanted to marry her. The night she was killed she had been on her way to meet him and they were going to spend the weekend together. Harm had not planned to propose that weekend, but he wanted to tell Diane that he was in love with her. He knew that she loved him, but he had felt … what? He never could describe how he felt, maybe just a little unsure or insecure. He didn't get a chance to lay those fears to rest; Diane had been killed before he knew without a doubt that she loved him just as much as he loved her.
"What was the name of your imaginary friend, Mac?" asked AJ.
"It was…it was Annie," said Mac in a quiet voice.
"You're joking!" said Harry, in stunned disbelief.
"No, what is it?" asked Mac.
"Diane's mother called Diane 'Annie'. She was the only one who did, always. That's an incredible coincidence. Abby and Sam won't believe this. That's my sister and her husband, Diane's parents."
Mac was shocked as well. She remembered how her imaginary friend had seemed so real to her, too. She was always there when Sarah needed someone to help her shut out her mother and father's arguing and fighting. Whenever she felt tiny and scared, 'Annie' was there. Suddenly Mac needed to be alone and just wanted to go home. She needed to think, to get away and just…
"They're anxious to meet you, by the way. As is your brother, Chase."
Seeing Mac's sudden look of foreboding, Harry realized that she was feeling overwhelmed by all that he was telling her so he quickly added, "… but that can wait. Right now I think you really should let me take you home so that you can relax."
"Yes, you should go home, Mac. Take the rest of the week and then as much time as you need … that's an order," said AJ when Mac would have objected. "I don't want to see you back here for at least two weeks."
"Thank you, Admiral," Mac said. The Admiral was giving her time to spend with her father.
"I'll take any open cases you have, Mac. Just leave the files on your desk," volunteered Harm.
Mac nodded okay to Harm and stood. She felt tired and drained. Harry stood as well and was preparing to leave with Mac when PO Coates rang the Admiral.
"I'm sorry to disturb you sir, but there's a Chase MacLain on the line asking if Harrison MacLain is here."
Harry smiled and gave a slight shake of the head, saying "My son. He's wondering why I haven't called."
"Thank you Coates, put it through," said AJ.
"You can put it on speaker, Admiral."
"Hello, Son."
"Dad, I've been trying to reach you. Let me guess, you left your phone at the hotel."
"Actually, no. I have it with me, but I turned it off," replied Harry with a wry smile.
"You what? Okay, Dad, what's going on? Did you talk to Sarah? How is she? Where is she?"
"Son, give me a chance to speak. By the way, you're on the speaker. Sarah is here with me as well as Adm. Chegwidden and Cmdr. Rabb," smiled Harry as he imagined his son's reaction.
"Oh. Dirty trick, Dad," said Chase, laughing. Father and son obviously got along well. "Hello, Sarah. I'm sorry for your loss. My mother passed away suddenly four years ago so I know how you must feel right now."
Mac and the others quickly looked at Harrison MacLain at that news. Harry wore a clouded expression at the mention of his wife's passing. "Thank you, Chase."
"You're welcome, Sarah. I'm looking forward to meeting you. I know all of this must be a shock to you, but when you've had time to get used to the idea of having a brother, I would love for us to get together. That way, I can tell you all the little things about our father that he hasn't told you," Chase added with a smile.
Harry chuckled and said to his son, "I think you should hang up now."
"See, Sarah, he's trying to rush me off the phone. Dad, I'm talking to my sister, if you don't mind.
"Sarah, the things I could tell you. I'm sure he's tried to make a good impression, but don't you believe it. Lawyers! Never trust a lawyer! Oh, I forgot…you're a lawyer. Oh well, I won't hold that against you," Chase said laughing.
Mac laughed in spite of herself. Her brother had a good sense of humor.
"Honestly, the best woman I ever knew was a lawyer, my mother. But let me tell, our Dad, he's a different story. He's a hard man, Sarah. Do you know that when I was growing up, he made me work. I mean, when other children were out playing ball, hanging out, going to summer camp, he made me work! And then he had the nerve to expect me to follow in his footsteps. Can you believe that? Me, a lawyer?"
Mac smiled and the others laughed while Harry just smiled and shook his head at his son's antics. He loved his son and appreciated his attempt to put Sarah at ease.
"Since you're not a lawyer, what do you do, Chase?" asked Mac.
"Well, after working so hard as a 'child', I vowed that I would make an easy living when I grew up… I'm a plastic surgeon," he said proudly. "No way was I going to law school."
Harry laughed and told his son, "Son, you've been on the phone for six minutes and 36 seconds and all you've done is complain. I'm hanging up now."
"Oh, and Sarah! Dad has this annoying habit of always knowing what time it is. He'll drive you crazy with that!"
Adm. Chegwidden and Harm laughed while Mac looked on her Dad at that new revelation.
"Well, if there was ever any doubt, it just flew out the window," said Harm.
"What do you mean?" asked Harry.
"Mac has perfect timing."
"That's what I just said," said Chase a bit quizzically.
"No, I mean my Mac, Sarah."
"You're kidding me! And you call her Mac, too?"
Harry beamed at his daughter. Mac smiled and told him, "Actually, it was six minutes and 52 seconds."
Harry laughed and said, "No, I'm pretty sure it was 36 seconds."
"52 seconds from the time PO Coates relayed that he was on the line. But 38 seconds from the time he first spoke," said Mac.
"Are you sure about that, because…" began Harry before Chase interrupted.
"Please, someone stop them."
"You have to forgive Chase, Sarah. You're talking to a kid who didn't learn to count until he was seven," teased Harry. "He refused to learn because he didn't want to go to school and leave his mother."
"Dad!"
"Oh, alright. And I won't tell her that you didn't start school until you were seven, either."
"Okay, now I'm hanging up. I'll get my turn, though. Just wait until I get Sarah alone."
"Bye, son," said Harry, shaking his head.
"Bye, all."
When Chase left the line, AJ disconnected. "He's really a plastic surgeon?" asked AJ.
Harry chuckled at AJ's look of disbelief and said, "Yes, he is. Chase specializes in pediatric reconstructive surgery. He's done well; fast becoming one of the top in his field worldwide. He's no lawyer, but he'll do," said Harry. Everyone could see that he was proud of his son."
"Well, Sarah, we should get going," Harry said, lightly placing his arm around her shoulder. "I'll take you home."
The End, Chapter 3
