Title: Triangles
Author: Silverslide
Rating: PG/ PG-13
Pairings: A/Tu/R
Status: Fin
Summary: Problems always happen in three way relationships
Disclaimer: I own nothing in the world except a notepad a pen and several plot bunnies that I keep as pets to amuse me. Enterprise and everything else here is owned by Paramount who don't let them have nearly enough fun as I do so they like me better. I did this not for money but to silence the constant nagging of this particular bunny.
". It works for Denobulans," Malcolm quoted something Trip had said the afternoon they had decided to give it a try. "No wonder Dr Phlox is always happy poor guy's probably always high on anti-depressants." Malcolm Reed was annoyed, no in truth he'd gone beyond annoyed about two days ago and was now bordering on severely pissed off. Humans he'd concluded over the past three days were made for single monogamous relationships. (Or at best polygamous ones where each party wasn't aware of the other)
"Why didn't I just date both of them in secrete?" He knew the answer to that one this was a finite ship and one would have been bound to find out about the other sooner or later, and two he loved both of them too much to hurt them like that. The thought this was a finite ship came back to him; 'Trip' Tucker must be somewhere onboard. Malcolm had looked everywhere he could think of literally and Tucker was nowhere to be found in any of the observation lounges, his quarters or anywhere else.
"Bloody fool of course." An idea struck Malcolm suddenly and he turned around and headed once again for the lift. Sub-Commander T'pol stepped casually aside to allow him to enter and behind her stood Jonathan Archer dressed in uniform and looking every bit the captain. Malcolm stifled a smile, last night when Jonathan had woken Malcolm during the night horny as hell he didn't look at all like the captain.
"Where're you headed off to lieutenant?" Malcolm noticed with satisfaction that Archer was blushing slightly it seemed that it wasn't just his own mind that had wondered onto other more personal events. Malcolm should have stayed in focus, shouldn't have let his mind wonder away from the task at hand, then maybe his mouth wouldn't have run off without him. "Looking for Commander Tucker sir."
T'Pol turned to face Malcolm. "Why should you be looking for Commander Tucker?" Behind her Archer raised his eyebrows as though asking the same question. Malcolm suddenly felt trapped in the small lift. "Just something I wanted to talk over with him." The sliding doors seemed to take an eternity to open, he noticed that his palms were slightly damp. "Damn when did it become so hot in there?" He wondered, "Probably when you started lying."
It wasn't a complete lie, he did want to talk something over with Commander Tucker, it wasn't "Just something" he'd made it seem casual, in fact it wasn't. What he wanted were answers not to talk things over, just plain simple answers to his questions.
As Malcolm suspected Trip Tucker was floating upside down in his 'happy' spot. "Aww hell." Tucker muttered under his breath. Malcolm released his hold on the bulkhead and floated up to meet Tucker. Malcolm decided not say anything right now he was angry and the last thing he wanted was to start this off on the wrong foot.
"Well you jus' gonna float there an' stare at me?"
Malcolm decided that silence was over rated throw him into the deep end see if he floats. "Why are you been such an ass to Jon and I?"
"Well that was direct, no 'are you okay Trip?' not even an attempt at a hug. How about, 'I missed you the past couple ah days where were you?' That could lead into it more gently, Malcolm I'm disappointed, I really though we'd done something about you lack of tact"
"That wasn't an answer, so I'll ask again. Why are you avoiding me."
"God Malcolm, you're not some school teacher and I've been a naughty pupil, "So I'll ask again" get off your high horse. Why am I been such an ass maybe because you're patronising, arrogant and a pain in the behind."
"Well this 'pain in the rear is leaving. When you want to talk about this, whatever it is you know where my quarters and Jon's are. Malcolm began to climb down using the bulkheads to avoid floating back up.
"You and him are welcome to each other." Trip climbed down to Malcolm. "I want nothing to do with you two personally anymore. Goodbye lieutenant."
~~*~~
"Why?" Archer was pacing the length of the room.
"I don't know." Malcolm was sat on the edge of the bed his left ankle resting on the opposite thigh.
"There's got to be a reason." Archer sat next to Malcolm
"I know there is but if he doesn't want to talk about it what can we do?" Malcolm shrugged his shoulders.
Archer placed an arm around Malcolm hugging him close. "We can be there for him. He'll open up when he's ready."
Malcolm lay on his back a few hours later, Jon was already asleep but Malcolm's mind kept on wondering back looking for clues anything that might indicate why Trip was ending this.
When Malcolm had been selected to serve on board Enterprise it had been one of the proudest moments of his life. He remembered shaking hands with his future captain. "I'll be most pleased to serve under you sir." His mind had added "Under you, over you, beside you, it's all a pleasure."
Few people could read Malcolm like Jonathan and Trip could, on the outside cool, distant with perfect decorum. Inside he was rebellious he thought things he didn't feel he could say out loud, Archer had seen through him soon enough and Trip found out during the shuttle pod incident. That's why he loved the two so much they knew what he was thinking without him needing to say it out loud.
Meeting 'Trip' Tucker had been an experience in itself, the man had so much energy and a fire bout him that you couldn't be around him and some of it not rub off on you. In Malcolms eyes not particularly handsome but what he lacked in looks he more than made up for in personality. Trip had a big heart and was one of the most affectionate people Malcolm had ever met.
Their relationship had had its ups and downs, mainly Malcolm found it hard to bring to the surface what he felt. For him showing affection didn't come easily, there had been times when he knew Trip wanted to call it quits because he thought Malcolm didn't feel comfortable. But Jon had been there, he'd explained to Trip to have patience with Malcolm. Trip could love unconditionally but he couldn't understand when he didn't get like for like.
It was difficult for Malcolm at first to break into a friendship, Jonathan and Trip had a long friendship, one which made a lot of history between the two. There had been times when the two of them had ventured beyond friendship but that hadn't lasted long. But Malcolm had overcome his difficulties he was glad that they had started this now. In truth he couldn't see a relationship with either Jon or Trip lasting long on its own, they complemented each other. Jon's common sense, Trips impulsive and adventurous nature and Malcolm fitted in, he joined the two together.
About three weeks after the shuttlepod incident Trip had decided to make his move apparently he'd liked Malcolm for a while now.
"Thing is, ah don't know how ya gonna feel 'bout this but." Trip was wriggling in his chair and his accent had thickened to the extent Malcolm was on the verge of wincing. "Ah really like ya and ah mean really like ya." Trip must have noticed the look of utter confusion running through Malcolms' face because he felt he had to make himself clear. "Ah mean ah wanna take this farther than friendship."
"Oh" It really was all that came to mind to Malcolm to say he'd been pretty certain what Trip was getting at from the start. The confused look was him trying to work out whether he should actually say yes and kiss the man senseless like he wanted to, or to hide behind his upbringing in rules and regulations. As a tactical officer he saw no shame in hiding especially if it saved one from been hurt, on a ship like this if their relationship went pear shaped the ramifications could put the whole ship at risk if he and Trip couldn't work together.
"Oh," Trip repeated. "Ah hope you don't think I'm puttin' ya under pressure."
"No, no not at all." Malcolm couldn't decide whether he was lying or not. "It's a sad day when a man doesn't know his own mind"
"Trip I gotta go." Malcolm rose from the mess hall table. Trip watched the doors close behind him and he sighed reached across the table and gathered Malcolms' untouched lunch and set about clearing their table safe in the knowledge he'd just ruined a perfectly decent friendship because of his lust. But he couldn't help feeling that this ran a lot deeper than lust.
Malcolm meanwhile was hitting his head against the bulkheads. "Ouch." bang "Ouch." Bang "ouch."
"Lieutenant," Malcolm turned to find T'pol stoically standing next to him eyebrows dutifully raised. "Could I enquire why you are currently engaged in..." She paused, as she seemed to be finding the right word. "Banging your head against the bulkheads."
"I'm thinking, sub-commander." Malcolm was at this point standing at ease.
"And self-harming helps you to 'think'"
"Not always but this time it does Ma'am."
"Have you considered seeing doctor Phlox? He may be able to help"
"Sub-commander with all due respect I'm not taking leave of my senses." T'pols eyebrows raised suggesting that trying to cause oneself severe brain damage does constitute taking leave of ones senses. "Humans do it all the time."
"Humans consciously try to cause themselves physical harm, in order to 'think'?"
Malcolm was fed up this conversation. "No M'am we do it because we are frustrated." T'pol who was becoming adept at reading Humans knew that Malcolm should talk about the reasons for his frustration. Seeing as she was the most logical person on board she was ideally positioned to offer him advise, this coupled with the fact she was interested to delve into this new piece of information on human oddities.
"Malcolm" Malcolm felt like slumping to the floor for Gods sakes doesn't it ever stop Jonathan Archer was heading towards them, he felt like a rabbit been cornered.
"Captain."
"Actually Malcolm it can wait. T'pol could I have a word with you." Malcolm could have kissed the man, when T'pol got a hold of something she was like Porthos with a bone she'd never let go unless someone ordered her to. Archer turnered around and winked at Malcolm, who mouthed 'Thank you.' And waited a few moments to admire Archers rear end.
Alone in his quarters Malcolm contemplated Trips offer. This thing with Archer was never gonna happen for one thing Archer was his commanding officer, and whilst he had to admit that Archer had a relaxed attitude to his command he doubted whether he would start up a relationship with his tactical officer.
Been with Trip was something which went against everything Malcolm had been brought up to believe in, been with a commanding officer and to add insult to injury a male commanding officer would send his father to an early grave. But he'd chosen his own way a long time ago, when he'd joined Starfleet he'd given his father the finger so what would this matter now?
The alarm blared through Archers quarters shaking Malcolm from his thoughts, 0425 he was on duty in 35 minutes and he hadn't slept a wink all night. "Shit."
~~*~~
T'pol stood at the head of the situation room, currently discussing the arrangements for an away team to visit the third moon of a new planet. It was the usual Wednesday morning briefing given by T'pol, mainly because Captain Archer took his compulsory half day every Wednesday morning, unless that is there was some sort of crisis he wouldn't be on duty till 1130.
"The satellite orbits the fifth planet of the solar system, it is of specific interest to astrometrics as there a total of three moons orbiting a relatively small planet they are interested in the gravitational interactions of the orbiting bodies."
"Wonderful work for the scientists but not for the adventurous amongst us." Malcolm caught Trip giving him a look echoing his thoughts, but Trip remembered in time the decision he had made to end it all between them. His eyes glazed over slightly and he looked away.
Malcolm made a mental note to corner Trip, to hell with giving him time that little exchange had sealed it for him, the man didn't want to end it, so why was he?
"Er probably run over some glitches in the UT" Hoshie was staring at her PADD looking at some data.
"And what does engineering propose to do during the three day break which we will be taking?" T'pol looked directly at Trip.
"S'long as we're not gonna be using the warp drive ah guess she'll need some going over the Nacells are lookin' off.
"We've been meaning to review the security procedures on board, with your permission Ma'am."
T'pol nodded her assent. With that the briefing was over, every department knew what the other departments were up to.
The rest of the day seemed to go by like a blur constituting looking at security codes, access to the computer and finding weak spots and punching holes in the security system and then filling in the gaps.
It wasn't a particularly physically demanding task but it was tedious and needed a fair amount of mental processing thinking up new procedures. By the time Malcolm came off duty he was high on work. It was the sort of buzz he got every time he was into something, working things out knowing he was getting somewhere, better than the painkillers that doctor Phlox administered (in Malcolms' opinion too often.)
Entering the messhall and looked around in the corner he noticed Trip Tucker sitting alone poking noncommittally at the fish laying on his plate as though he was unsure whether it had survived the cooking process and may still be alive.
Malcolm decided that now was as good a time as any. "Trip. May I sit down."
"Will what I say make a difference?"
"It would."
"Gawd ya two jus don't let up do ya?"
"No, not when I can see you're hurting Trip I can see the pain in your eyes."
"What." Trip hissed under his breath. "I can't break up with ya two without getting' all cut up about it." He speared his fish with his knife. "Ya nothing special ya know."
Trip got up to leave Malcolm noticed with a wry smile that this was the same table a few months ago Trip had asked him out, then unlike now,it was Malcolm walking out.
"Screw it." Malcolm said a silent thank you to the powers that be that the mess hall was empty except for the three tables by the viewport where groups of personnel were involved in an animated discussion between tables on some topic or another. They hadn't noticed the heated all be it whispered conversation between their senior officers.
Malcolm pressed the button by Trips door and waited, he rang and waited again, after the eighth ring Trip gave in and opened the door.
"You're something special to me."
That seemed to knock Trip back somewhat.
"And you're something special to Jon. We both love you."
"But not as much as you love each other."
"What?" Malcolm gave a furtive glance around. "Can I come in." Trip didn't move from the doorframe. "Or do you really want to have this conversation in public?"
"What I really want is not to have this conversation."
Malcolm knew exactly where his next blow was aimed, Trip had one weakness in an argument he was a very fair person. "Trip I know how you feel, you've made that very clear you've thrown every insult under the sun at me, don't you think I should have my turn to defend my side.
Trip stepped back and the door closed behind Malcolm Trip stood arms crossed staring at Malcolm. "Go on then, say what you have to say then leave."
"What's wrong?" That about summarised how Malcolm felt right about now he'd moved on from anger he was concerned, one of the people he cared for most in his life was in pain.
"Like you need to ask. You and Jon."
"Why?" Malcolm saw the tear roll down Trips cheek, He knew Trip was sensitive the man cried at movies for goodness sakes, that was one of the reasons he loved him. Malcolm moved to comfort Trip who pushed him away. "What have we done."
"Malcolm, I really don't want to go into this right now, like I told Jon when he came round you two are welcomed to each other."
"How touching and considerate of you." Malcolm felt the return of his dry humour "and could I ask what exactly happened to cause you to take that turn of mind?"
Trip rubbed his forehead and sighed. "Do you get the feeling we're going round in circles here."
"Yes indeed I do." Malcolm moved towards Trip and stared at him levelly "Spit it out and then maybe we'll get somewhere."
"I know you love Jon." 5 words and Trip finished as though that explained it all.
"Trip you knew that from the beginning, I have never lied to you that I can't chose between the two of you. I love you both. So I don't. God Lord." Realisation dawned on Malcolm. "You think, you think I've chosen that I've made up my mind that I love Jon more than you?"
"Well haven't you?"
"No you daft sod. Jesus if anything my feelings for you both have I don't know settled down. I finally get used to the idea that I can love two people and I can have both of you and you go and do something like this."
"Malcolm, if you're lying to me."
"WHY SHOULD I?" Malcolm shouted.
Trip jumped, he'd never heard Malcolm raise his voice before. "Trip I adore you, you're the cutest person I know. I love the way you smile and get all shy when people talk about you or something you've done, I love that glow you get in your eyes when someone mentions your beloved engines. I love the way you're so loud and the way you make people smile, I love when you cry at movies, and I love your teddy bears. In short I love you."
"Malcolm."
"Why would you think that Trip, you know I had my doubts about whether this was the right way for us to go. I really thought we were getting a handle on this but maybe this can't work after all."
"Malcolm." Trip reached out to Malcolm "Don't go, please it's just that I saw how close you and Jon are together the way you reach out to him you don't do that with me, with us I have to reach out to you. The other night you said you'd be working late and, and Jon said he'd be working out in the gym.
I finished writing my report a bit early and decided to join Jon, it's been a while since we've done something together as just friends. Jon wasn't in the gym when I checked internal sensors it turned out he was in his quarters with you. I heard the shoe drop."
Malcolm laughed. "So you thought Jon and I were off having sex without you?" Trip nodded. "Well think of it this way in two weeks to the day what happens?"
"Erm it's mah birthday."
"We were planning your surprise birthday party. Though I don't think it's much of a surprise now."
"Have I made an absolute fool of myself?"
"Utterly, that's one of the reasons I adore you."
"Am I forgiven."
"I don't know isn't it traditional to have a kiss."
"Who am I to break away form tradition? The kiss was slow lingering and didn't really demand much just affirmed how each felt about the other.
"You know Jon's worried sick about you."
"Yeah ah do."
"You really should talk about it to him."
"All of us should talk together."
"If that's what you want."
"Malcolm, I'm serious I'd like for us three to be closer together. Sometimes it feels like I'm having two relationships one with you and one with Jon."
"Trip, we're making the rules up as we go along on this one I'm afraid. We're gonna make mistakes."
~~*~~
Malcolm smiled across the room at Trip who raised his half filled glass in reply and made his way across the room, one look at him and Malcolm could tell he was horny. "Wanna relocate?" The whisper rippled down Malcolms' spine.
"Not really it's a great party"
"Really?" He placed his glass down on a nearby table and looked at Malcolm then Archer in turn moving forwards he reached down and grabbed each of their crotch. "Sure ya don't wanna get out of here?"
Malcolm looked at Jon. "Well maybe we should all get to bed, Jon sighed. Been a long day and all."
"If ah have anything to do with it, it's gonna be an even longer night."
"Promises, promises." Jon slapped Trips behind.
Malcolm realised a few hours later that he loved this, waking up tangled between Jon and Trip, it was like they fitted perfectly together all three of them. Malcolms' mind wandered away to a few days after Trip had asked him out.
Malcolm and T'pol were away planet side Trip was operating some equipment and T'pol was heading up the science team along with Phlox.
"My compliments to the chef." Malcolm said to Archer.
"Thanks, it's not often that I cook." Archer smiled back holding Malcolms' gaze. Malcolm hadn't reached his position by sheer good luck, he could read people and he sensed something was on Archers mind.
"I didn't know you could cook, sir." Good looking, and a great cook, why'd he have to be my CO"
"There's a lot you don't know about me." Archer leaned forward on the table smiling at Malcolm elbows resting on either side of his plate.
Malcolm unsure how to react took a sip of water to buy himself some time, and think up an answer.
"Malcolm, I wanna ask you something. Life's too short to beat around the bush" Archer paused deliberately. "Like you do. Out here nearly every species we meet seems for some bizarre reason which I'm beginning to take personally wants to at best use us for their own furtive reasons or blow us to smithereens.
So I guess, been out here it's taught me to appreciate life and all it has to give. Malcolm I like you more than I should, I admire your work and the way you have this dry sense of humour, which you rarely show and even then it's when you let it slip. Do you get what I'm trying to get at here?"
Malcolm nodded.
"Good, so what do you say."
"I say I'm confused."
"Ah, I pushed you too fast. I guess I thought I'd at least got you to lower your guard and stop hiding behind your training."
"You have. Like you said, it's a long journey we're in for, if we can't separate the personal from the professional it's going to be lonely."
Archer nodded remembering the conversation well. "So why are you confused?"
"It's a long story. Can I think this over?"
"Okay."
Malcolm had come to a decision to stop having meals with fellow officers as it seemed at each one he was getting proposals.
Problem was he loved both Trip and Jon, liked different aspects of each of them. He could see himself been playful and fun with Trip, serious with Jon talking about current affairs.
He could picture Trip cheering him up making him and laugh loosening him up when they were alone. He could see himself influencing Trip to become less flamboyant and loud.
He could see Jon changing his views on life, making him more relaxed bending the rules a little more. And he could love Jon support him be therefore him. He had things to give to and gain from both potential relationships.
Trip came back from his away mission, a week later he found himself having dinner at the captains table with Trip. Malcolm felt cornered the moment he arrived and found T'pol wouldn't be present.
"Sorry, she had some data to go over so she kindly withdrew from dinner this week."
"Oh." Malcolm wished he'd given some sort of excuse.
Over Pineapple sorbet Archer dropped casually into conversation.
". Oh and Trip was just telling me he asked you out as well."
Malcolm choked on a piece of pineapple. "He did?" His voice was horse due to the coughing he'd had to do to dislodge the pineapple.
"Yeah, don't worry he didn't mean to, just sort of came up."
"Oh."
"What does that mean." Trip looked at Malcolm. "Ya do it a lot that whole 'oh' thing"
"Ignore Trip, he babbles when he's nervous. In no way pressuring you here but have you come to a decision yet?"
"Please don't take this the wrong way but, neither of you."
Archer looked at the table. "Right."
"Why?" Trip demanded
"It's nothing to do with you more me. I like both of you, and truth be told I can see it working with either of you."
Trip scratched his head. "Yeah go on 'cause so far ah'm not seein' ya point."
"It's simple really I can't decide who I want to be with most. You both have equal standing in my heart."
Archer laughed. "Malcolm that's got to be one of the most polite turn downs I've ever received."
"Can't imagine you've had many turndowns." Malcolm went beetroot red. "Sorry captain, just came out."
"Malcolm don't worry about it."
"Sorry but ah, still don't see a problem here."
"Trip I can't chose one of you."
"Why not have your cake and eat it?" Trip looked serious.
"What you mean, have a relationship with both of you?"
"Why not? It works for Denobulans."
"Trip, do you have any idea what you're suggesting that Malcolm has a relationship with not one but both of us." Archer looked at Trip with disbelief
"Yeah."
"You're insane."
"No Ah'm not, how 'bout if we all have a relationship together."
"Go on."
"That's all there is to it."
You make it all sound so simple." Malcolm sighed.
"Well it is, you know me don't like any complications. Jon and I have had buddy sex before Ah love him in a kinda weird way, but Ah don't think we could take it further ya know."
Malcolm looked at Archer who shrugged. "It wouldn't have worked out between me and Trip." He became thoughtful. "But maybe it could work between me, you and Him."
Malcolm looked to his left at Trip sleeping relaxed and sated to His right Jon lay gently snoring. "I guess it's me you and him for a while yet.
*Silverslide*
Summary: Problems always happen in three way relationships
Disclaimer: I own nothing in the world except a notepad a pen and several plot bunnies that I keep as pets to amuse me. Enterprise and everything else here is owned by Paramount who don't let them have nearly enough fun as I do so they like me better. I did this not for money but to silence the constant nagging of this particular bunny.
". It works for Denobulans," Malcolm quoted something Trip had said the afternoon they had decided to give it a try. "No wonder Dr Phlox is always happy poor guy's probably always high on anti-depressants." Malcolm Reed was annoyed, no in truth he'd gone beyond annoyed about two days ago and was now bordering on severely pissed off. Humans he'd concluded over the past three days were made for single monogamous relationships. (Or at best polygamous ones where each party wasn't aware of the other)
"Why didn't I just date both of them in secrete?" He knew the answer to that one this was a finite ship and one would have been bound to find out about the other sooner or later, and two he loved both of them too much to hurt them like that. The thought this was a finite ship came back to him; 'Trip' Tucker must be somewhere onboard. Malcolm had looked everywhere he could think of literally and Tucker was nowhere to be found in any of the observation lounges, his quarters or anywhere else.
"Bloody fool of course." An idea struck Malcolm suddenly and he turned around and headed once again for the lift. Sub-Commander T'pol stepped casually aside to allow him to enter and behind her stood Jonathan Archer dressed in uniform and looking every bit the captain. Malcolm stifled a smile, last night when Jonathan had woken Malcolm during the night horny as hell he didn't look at all like the captain.
"Where're you headed off to lieutenant?" Malcolm noticed with satisfaction that Archer was blushing slightly it seemed that it wasn't just his own mind that had wondered onto other more personal events. Malcolm should have stayed in focus, shouldn't have let his mind wonder away from the task at hand, then maybe his mouth wouldn't have run off without him. "Looking for Commander Tucker sir."
T'Pol turned to face Malcolm. "Why should you be looking for Commander Tucker?" Behind her Archer raised his eyebrows as though asking the same question. Malcolm suddenly felt trapped in the small lift. "Just something I wanted to talk over with him." The sliding doors seemed to take an eternity to open, he noticed that his palms were slightly damp. "Damn when did it become so hot in there?" He wondered, "Probably when you started lying."
It wasn't a complete lie, he did want to talk something over with Commander Tucker, it wasn't "Just something" he'd made it seem casual, in fact it wasn't. What he wanted were answers not to talk things over, just plain simple answers to his questions.
As Malcolm suspected Trip Tucker was floating upside down in his 'happy' spot. "Aww hell." Tucker muttered under his breath. Malcolm released his hold on the bulkhead and floated up to meet Tucker. Malcolm decided not say anything right now he was angry and the last thing he wanted was to start this off on the wrong foot.
"Well you jus' gonna float there an' stare at me?"
Malcolm decided that silence was over rated throw him into the deep end see if he floats. "Why are you been such an ass to Jon and I?"
"Well that was direct, no 'are you okay Trip?' not even an attempt at a hug. How about, 'I missed you the past couple ah days where were you?' That could lead into it more gently, Malcolm I'm disappointed, I really though we'd done something about you lack of tact"
"That wasn't an answer, so I'll ask again. Why are you avoiding me."
"God Malcolm, you're not some school teacher and I've been a naughty pupil, "So I'll ask again" get off your high horse. Why am I been such an ass maybe because you're patronising, arrogant and a pain in the behind."
"Well this 'pain in the rear is leaving. When you want to talk about this, whatever it is you know where my quarters and Jon's are. Malcolm began to climb down using the bulkheads to avoid floating back up.
"You and him are welcome to each other." Trip climbed down to Malcolm. "I want nothing to do with you two personally anymore. Goodbye lieutenant."
~~*~~
"Why?" Archer was pacing the length of the room.
"I don't know." Malcolm was sat on the edge of the bed his left ankle resting on the opposite thigh.
"There's got to be a reason." Archer sat next to Malcolm
"I know there is but if he doesn't want to talk about it what can we do?" Malcolm shrugged his shoulders.
Archer placed an arm around Malcolm hugging him close. "We can be there for him. He'll open up when he's ready."
Malcolm lay on his back a few hours later, Jon was already asleep but Malcolm's mind kept on wondering back looking for clues anything that might indicate why Trip was ending this.
When Malcolm had been selected to serve on board Enterprise it had been one of the proudest moments of his life. He remembered shaking hands with his future captain. "I'll be most pleased to serve under you sir." His mind had added "Under you, over you, beside you, it's all a pleasure."
Few people could read Malcolm like Jonathan and Trip could, on the outside cool, distant with perfect decorum. Inside he was rebellious he thought things he didn't feel he could say out loud, Archer had seen through him soon enough and Trip found out during the shuttle pod incident. That's why he loved the two so much they knew what he was thinking without him needing to say it out loud.
Meeting 'Trip' Tucker had been an experience in itself, the man had so much energy and a fire bout him that you couldn't be around him and some of it not rub off on you. In Malcolms eyes not particularly handsome but what he lacked in looks he more than made up for in personality. Trip had a big heart and was one of the most affectionate people Malcolm had ever met.
Their relationship had had its ups and downs, mainly Malcolm found it hard to bring to the surface what he felt. For him showing affection didn't come easily, there had been times when he knew Trip wanted to call it quits because he thought Malcolm didn't feel comfortable. But Jon had been there, he'd explained to Trip to have patience with Malcolm. Trip could love unconditionally but he couldn't understand when he didn't get like for like.
It was difficult for Malcolm at first to break into a friendship, Jonathan and Trip had a long friendship, one which made a lot of history between the two. There had been times when the two of them had ventured beyond friendship but that hadn't lasted long. But Malcolm had overcome his difficulties he was glad that they had started this now. In truth he couldn't see a relationship with either Jon or Trip lasting long on its own, they complemented each other. Jon's common sense, Trips impulsive and adventurous nature and Malcolm fitted in, he joined the two together.
About three weeks after the shuttlepod incident Trip had decided to make his move apparently he'd liked Malcolm for a while now.
"Thing is, ah don't know how ya gonna feel 'bout this but." Trip was wriggling in his chair and his accent had thickened to the extent Malcolm was on the verge of wincing. "Ah really like ya and ah mean really like ya." Trip must have noticed the look of utter confusion running through Malcolms' face because he felt he had to make himself clear. "Ah mean ah wanna take this farther than friendship."
"Oh" It really was all that came to mind to Malcolm to say he'd been pretty certain what Trip was getting at from the start. The confused look was him trying to work out whether he should actually say yes and kiss the man senseless like he wanted to, or to hide behind his upbringing in rules and regulations. As a tactical officer he saw no shame in hiding especially if it saved one from been hurt, on a ship like this if their relationship went pear shaped the ramifications could put the whole ship at risk if he and Trip couldn't work together.
"Oh," Trip repeated. "Ah hope you don't think I'm puttin' ya under pressure."
"No, no not at all." Malcolm couldn't decide whether he was lying or not. "It's a sad day when a man doesn't know his own mind"
"Trip I gotta go." Malcolm rose from the mess hall table. Trip watched the doors close behind him and he sighed reached across the table and gathered Malcolms' untouched lunch and set about clearing their table safe in the knowledge he'd just ruined a perfectly decent friendship because of his lust. But he couldn't help feeling that this ran a lot deeper than lust.
Malcolm meanwhile was hitting his head against the bulkheads. "Ouch." bang "Ouch." Bang "ouch."
"Lieutenant," Malcolm turned to find T'pol stoically standing next to him eyebrows dutifully raised. "Could I enquire why you are currently engaged in..." She paused, as she seemed to be finding the right word. "Banging your head against the bulkheads."
"I'm thinking, sub-commander." Malcolm was at this point standing at ease.
"And self-harming helps you to 'think'"
"Not always but this time it does Ma'am."
"Have you considered seeing doctor Phlox? He may be able to help"
"Sub-commander with all due respect I'm not taking leave of my senses." T'pols eyebrows raised suggesting that trying to cause oneself severe brain damage does constitute taking leave of ones senses. "Humans do it all the time."
"Humans consciously try to cause themselves physical harm, in order to 'think'?"
Malcolm was fed up this conversation. "No M'am we do it because we are frustrated." T'pol who was becoming adept at reading Humans knew that Malcolm should talk about the reasons for his frustration. Seeing as she was the most logical person on board she was ideally positioned to offer him advise, this coupled with the fact she was interested to delve into this new piece of information on human oddities.
"Malcolm" Malcolm felt like slumping to the floor for Gods sakes doesn't it ever stop Jonathan Archer was heading towards them, he felt like a rabbit been cornered.
"Captain."
"Actually Malcolm it can wait. T'pol could I have a word with you." Malcolm could have kissed the man, when T'pol got a hold of something she was like Porthos with a bone she'd never let go unless someone ordered her to. Archer turnered around and winked at Malcolm, who mouthed 'Thank you.' And waited a few moments to admire Archers rear end.
Alone in his quarters Malcolm contemplated Trips offer. This thing with Archer was never gonna happen for one thing Archer was his commanding officer, and whilst he had to admit that Archer had a relaxed attitude to his command he doubted whether he would start up a relationship with his tactical officer.
Been with Trip was something which went against everything Malcolm had been brought up to believe in, been with a commanding officer and to add insult to injury a male commanding officer would send his father to an early grave. But he'd chosen his own way a long time ago, when he'd joined Starfleet he'd given his father the finger so what would this matter now?
The alarm blared through Archers quarters shaking Malcolm from his thoughts, 0425 he was on duty in 35 minutes and he hadn't slept a wink all night. "Shit."
~~*~~
T'pol stood at the head of the situation room, currently discussing the arrangements for an away team to visit the third moon of a new planet. It was the usual Wednesday morning briefing given by T'pol, mainly because Captain Archer took his compulsory half day every Wednesday morning, unless that is there was some sort of crisis he wouldn't be on duty till 1130.
"The satellite orbits the fifth planet of the solar system, it is of specific interest to astrometrics as there a total of three moons orbiting a relatively small planet they are interested in the gravitational interactions of the orbiting bodies."
"Wonderful work for the scientists but not for the adventurous amongst us." Malcolm caught Trip giving him a look echoing his thoughts, but Trip remembered in time the decision he had made to end it all between them. His eyes glazed over slightly and he looked away.
Malcolm made a mental note to corner Trip, to hell with giving him time that little exchange had sealed it for him, the man didn't want to end it, so why was he?
"Er probably run over some glitches in the UT" Hoshie was staring at her PADD looking at some data.
"And what does engineering propose to do during the three day break which we will be taking?" T'pol looked directly at Trip.
"S'long as we're not gonna be using the warp drive ah guess she'll need some going over the Nacells are lookin' off.
"We've been meaning to review the security procedures on board, with your permission Ma'am."
T'pol nodded her assent. With that the briefing was over, every department knew what the other departments were up to.
The rest of the day seemed to go by like a blur constituting looking at security codes, access to the computer and finding weak spots and punching holes in the security system and then filling in the gaps.
It wasn't a particularly physically demanding task but it was tedious and needed a fair amount of mental processing thinking up new procedures. By the time Malcolm came off duty he was high on work. It was the sort of buzz he got every time he was into something, working things out knowing he was getting somewhere, better than the painkillers that doctor Phlox administered (in Malcolms' opinion too often.)
Entering the messhall and looked around in the corner he noticed Trip Tucker sitting alone poking noncommittally at the fish laying on his plate as though he was unsure whether it had survived the cooking process and may still be alive.
Malcolm decided that now was as good a time as any. "Trip. May I sit down."
"Will what I say make a difference?"
"It would."
"Gawd ya two jus don't let up do ya?"
"No, not when I can see you're hurting Trip I can see the pain in your eyes."
"What." Trip hissed under his breath. "I can't break up with ya two without getting' all cut up about it." He speared his fish with his knife. "Ya nothing special ya know."
Trip got up to leave Malcolm noticed with a wry smile that this was the same table a few months ago Trip had asked him out, then unlike now,it was Malcolm walking out.
"Screw it." Malcolm said a silent thank you to the powers that be that the mess hall was empty except for the three tables by the viewport where groups of personnel were involved in an animated discussion between tables on some topic or another. They hadn't noticed the heated all be it whispered conversation between their senior officers.
Malcolm pressed the button by Trips door and waited, he rang and waited again, after the eighth ring Trip gave in and opened the door.
"You're something special to me."
That seemed to knock Trip back somewhat.
"And you're something special to Jon. We both love you."
"But not as much as you love each other."
"What?" Malcolm gave a furtive glance around. "Can I come in." Trip didn't move from the doorframe. "Or do you really want to have this conversation in public?"
"What I really want is not to have this conversation."
Malcolm knew exactly where his next blow was aimed, Trip had one weakness in an argument he was a very fair person. "Trip I know how you feel, you've made that very clear you've thrown every insult under the sun at me, don't you think I should have my turn to defend my side.
Trip stepped back and the door closed behind Malcolm Trip stood arms crossed staring at Malcolm. "Go on then, say what you have to say then leave."
"What's wrong?" That about summarised how Malcolm felt right about now he'd moved on from anger he was concerned, one of the people he cared for most in his life was in pain.
"Like you need to ask. You and Jon."
"Why?" Malcolm saw the tear roll down Trips cheek, He knew Trip was sensitive the man cried at movies for goodness sakes, that was one of the reasons he loved him. Malcolm moved to comfort Trip who pushed him away. "What have we done."
"Malcolm, I really don't want to go into this right now, like I told Jon when he came round you two are welcomed to each other."
"How touching and considerate of you." Malcolm felt the return of his dry humour "and could I ask what exactly happened to cause you to take that turn of mind?"
Trip rubbed his forehead and sighed. "Do you get the feeling we're going round in circles here."
"Yes indeed I do." Malcolm moved towards Trip and stared at him levelly "Spit it out and then maybe we'll get somewhere."
"I know you love Jon." 5 words and Trip finished as though that explained it all.
"Trip you knew that from the beginning, I have never lied to you that I can't chose between the two of you. I love you both. So I don't. God Lord." Realisation dawned on Malcolm. "You think, you think I've chosen that I've made up my mind that I love Jon more than you?"
"Well haven't you?"
"No you daft sod. Jesus if anything my feelings for you both have I don't know settled down. I finally get used to the idea that I can love two people and I can have both of you and you go and do something like this."
"Malcolm, if you're lying to me."
"WHY SHOULD I?" Malcolm shouted.
Trip jumped, he'd never heard Malcolm raise his voice before. "Trip I adore you, you're the cutest person I know. I love the way you smile and get all shy when people talk about you or something you've done, I love that glow you get in your eyes when someone mentions your beloved engines. I love the way you're so loud and the way you make people smile, I love when you cry at movies, and I love your teddy bears. In short I love you."
"Malcolm."
"Why would you think that Trip, you know I had my doubts about whether this was the right way for us to go. I really thought we were getting a handle on this but maybe this can't work after all."
"Malcolm." Trip reached out to Malcolm "Don't go, please it's just that I saw how close you and Jon are together the way you reach out to him you don't do that with me, with us I have to reach out to you. The other night you said you'd be working late and, and Jon said he'd be working out in the gym.
I finished writing my report a bit early and decided to join Jon, it's been a while since we've done something together as just friends. Jon wasn't in the gym when I checked internal sensors it turned out he was in his quarters with you. I heard the shoe drop."
Malcolm laughed. "So you thought Jon and I were off having sex without you?" Trip nodded. "Well think of it this way in two weeks to the day what happens?"
"Erm it's mah birthday."
"We were planning your surprise birthday party. Though I don't think it's much of a surprise now."
"Have I made an absolute fool of myself?"
"Utterly, that's one of the reasons I adore you."
"Am I forgiven."
"I don't know isn't it traditional to have a kiss."
"Who am I to break away form tradition? The kiss was slow lingering and didn't really demand much just affirmed how each felt about the other.
"You know Jon's worried sick about you."
"Yeah ah do."
"You really should talk about it to him."
"All of us should talk together."
"If that's what you want."
"Malcolm, I'm serious I'd like for us three to be closer together. Sometimes it feels like I'm having two relationships one with you and one with Jon."
"Trip, we're making the rules up as we go along on this one I'm afraid. We're gonna make mistakes."
~~*~~
Malcolm smiled across the room at Trip who raised his half filled glass in reply and made his way across the room, one look at him and Malcolm could tell he was horny. "Wanna relocate?" The whisper rippled down Malcolms' spine.
"Not really it's a great party"
"Really?" He placed his glass down on a nearby table and looked at Malcolm then Archer in turn moving forwards he reached down and grabbed each of their crotch. "Sure ya don't wanna get out of here?"
Malcolm looked at Jon. "Well maybe we should all get to bed, Jon sighed. Been a long day and all."
"If ah have anything to do with it, it's gonna be an even longer night."
"Promises, promises." Jon slapped Trips behind.
Malcolm realised a few hours later that he loved this, waking up tangled between Jon and Trip, it was like they fitted perfectly together all three of them. Malcolms' mind wandered away to a few days after Trip had asked him out.
Malcolm and T'pol were away planet side Trip was operating some equipment and T'pol was heading up the science team along with Phlox.
"My compliments to the chef." Malcolm said to Archer.
"Thanks, it's not often that I cook." Archer smiled back holding Malcolms' gaze. Malcolm hadn't reached his position by sheer good luck, he could read people and he sensed something was on Archers mind.
"I didn't know you could cook, sir." Good looking, and a great cook, why'd he have to be my CO"
"There's a lot you don't know about me." Archer leaned forward on the table smiling at Malcolm elbows resting on either side of his plate.
Malcolm unsure how to react took a sip of water to buy himself some time, and think up an answer.
"Malcolm, I wanna ask you something. Life's too short to beat around the bush" Archer paused deliberately. "Like you do. Out here nearly every species we meet seems for some bizarre reason which I'm beginning to take personally wants to at best use us for their own furtive reasons or blow us to smithereens.
So I guess, been out here it's taught me to appreciate life and all it has to give. Malcolm I like you more than I should, I admire your work and the way you have this dry sense of humour, which you rarely show and even then it's when you let it slip. Do you get what I'm trying to get at here?"
Malcolm nodded.
"Good, so what do you say."
"I say I'm confused."
"Ah, I pushed you too fast. I guess I thought I'd at least got you to lower your guard and stop hiding behind your training."
"You have. Like you said, it's a long journey we're in for, if we can't separate the personal from the professional it's going to be lonely."
Archer nodded remembering the conversation well. "So why are you confused?"
"It's a long story. Can I think this over?"
"Okay."
Malcolm had come to a decision to stop having meals with fellow officers as it seemed at each one he was getting proposals.
Problem was he loved both Trip and Jon, liked different aspects of each of them. He could see himself been playful and fun with Trip, serious with Jon talking about current affairs.
He could picture Trip cheering him up making him and laugh loosening him up when they were alone. He could see himself influencing Trip to become less flamboyant and loud.
He could see Jon changing his views on life, making him more relaxed bending the rules a little more. And he could love Jon support him be therefore him. He had things to give to and gain from both potential relationships.
Trip came back from his away mission, a week later he found himself having dinner at the captains table with Trip. Malcolm felt cornered the moment he arrived and found T'pol wouldn't be present.
"Sorry, she had some data to go over so she kindly withdrew from dinner this week."
"Oh." Malcolm wished he'd given some sort of excuse.
Over Pineapple sorbet Archer dropped casually into conversation.
". Oh and Trip was just telling me he asked you out as well."
Malcolm choked on a piece of pineapple. "He did?" His voice was horse due to the coughing he'd had to do to dislodge the pineapple.
"Yeah, don't worry he didn't mean to, just sort of came up."
"Oh."
"What does that mean." Trip looked at Malcolm. "Ya do it a lot that whole 'oh' thing"
"Ignore Trip, he babbles when he's nervous. In no way pressuring you here but have you come to a decision yet?"
"Please don't take this the wrong way but, neither of you."
Archer looked at the table. "Right."
"Why?" Trip demanded
"It's nothing to do with you more me. I like both of you, and truth be told I can see it working with either of you."
Trip scratched his head. "Yeah go on 'cause so far ah'm not seein' ya point."
"It's simple really I can't decide who I want to be with most. You both have equal standing in my heart."
Archer laughed. "Malcolm that's got to be one of the most polite turn downs I've ever received."
"Can't imagine you've had many turndowns." Malcolm went beetroot red. "Sorry captain, just came out."
"Malcolm don't worry about it."
"Sorry but ah, still don't see a problem here."
"Trip I can't chose one of you."
"Why not have your cake and eat it?" Trip looked serious.
"What you mean, have a relationship with both of you?"
"Why not? It works for Denobulans."
"Trip, do you have any idea what you're suggesting that Malcolm has a relationship with not one but both of us." Archer looked at Trip with disbelief
"Yeah."
"You're insane."
"No Ah'm not, how 'bout if we all have a relationship together."
"Go on."
"That's all there is to it."
You make it all sound so simple." Malcolm sighed.
"Well it is, you know me don't like any complications. Jon and I have had buddy sex before Ah love him in a kinda weird way, but Ah don't think we could take it further ya know."
Malcolm looked at Archer who shrugged. "It wouldn't have worked out between me and Trip." He became thoughtful. "But maybe it could work between me, you and Him."
Malcolm looked to his left at Trip sleeping relaxed and sated to His right Jon lay gently snoring. "I guess it's me you and him for a while yet.
*Silverslide*
