Ale: It's Addicting
Chapter 3 - A Week Together
A/N: Yes I know this chapter is extremely long, but it's hilarious! It gets better as you go, I promise! And just to remind you, none of these characters are my own. I didn't make Lorien either, although I would like to live their if it were a place on Earth.
The four hobbits and man are taken to a room within one of the trees. This will be their room for the next week. It's not too bad. It has a fountain for drinking and bathing, food will be brought to them, the only contact they will have with anyone outside that room. There are five feather mattresses lying upon the floor.
The walls are made up of branches, leaves, and vines of green and gold. The floor is of elven carved wood. There are several small windows throughout the walls, but none are big enough for really seeing anything. There is only one entrance into or out of this room. It can be blocked by a vine door or guarded by well guards.
They are taken by Galadriel and Celeborn to this room at 4 o'clock Monday afternoon. It's only 168 hours that they have to endure each other, yeah only!
"I hope you have fun!" Galadriel tells them, with a smerk on her face.
"Try not to kill each other! It takes too much time to clean up," Celeborn tells them half jocking.
And so the vine door is shut. They will not step foot out of that room for one whole week. What will happen?
"Well, since we are stuck in here together we should make the best of it." Aragorn tells them.
"This is all your fault Frodo!" Sam yells.
"Sam we shouldn't fight," he says "But stop blaming stuff on me!" he lunges at Sam but is stopped by Aragorn.
"You two will not fight! I don't know what started this, but you two had better knock it off!" Aragorn yells at them.
"He started it!" they yell at each other.
"Why do you two keep doing this? You're supposed to be freinds, not fighters. Come on forgive and forget!" Pippen tells them as they sit in opposite corners with Pippen standing in the middle of the room.
"I'll apologize as soon as he does," Sam said
"Yeah well, I'm not apologizing until he does." Frodo says.
"Well, that didn't work!" Merry says.
The first day passed slowly and without much change in the attitudes of two hobbits. They don't even know what started this feud any more, but they just know that they should fight for some weird hobbit reason. All that day Aragorn sat in a corner sharpening his sword. Merry and Pippen talked in a corner and Frodo and Sam were in the other two corners doing nothing really. Sam was counting the seconds until they get out of there. Frodo was thinking about the journey ahead and about his ring.
The morning of the second day began with the sound of Sam and Frodo yelling at each other.
"Shut up!" Aragorn yells "Just shut up!"
"I think Aragorn is mad at Sam and Frodo!" Pippen tells Merry.
"No duh Pip," Merry tells him.
The rest of that day passed relatively fast. Merry, Pippen and Sam talked together. Aragorn and Frodo talk together. The talking seems to take away from the passing hours. They talk about everything from Shire tales to their adventure ahead.
The next, third, day begins with the sound of singing. Aragorn is singing a sweet, slow love song as he sits in the corner. "What are you singing?" Pippen askes him.
"A song about the Evenstar. The most beautiful elf." Aragorn tells them.
"Hey isn't that Elrond's daughter?" Sam asks.
"Yes, and Galdriel's grand-daughter," Aragorn tells them.
"Hey, so Aragorn you got a thing for this elf?" Merry suggests.
"Not really a 'thing', per say," Aragorn says blushing bright as a rose.
"Aragorn has a girlfriend, Aragorn has a girlfriend, Strider has a girlfriend..," they shant while dancing around in a circle, the four of them together.
"Leave me alone!" Aragorn demanded blushing even brighter.
Sam and Frodo became suddenly aware that they were dancing side by side. They quickly stopped and retreated to their own feather mattress. "If you two will get along, you can keep teasing me."
"Aragorn has a girlfreind!" they yell out once again, and are silent for the rest of that day and night.
The sound of water splashing woke Frodo up from a day dream. Pippen has gone to the fountain and begun to splash water at the four others. They quickly get up and retaliate. All that day they have a water war. It's hard to tell who actually won, considering they were all soaked and laughing by the end of the day. Even Sam and Frodo were laughing together by the end of it.
The rest of that day they spent drying off and talking together. Sam and Frodo even seamed to forget about their feud for that day. They were all just happy to have some fun.
The fourth day began by Pippen coming over to Aragorn and hitting his head saying "You're it!" and running away from him. Aragorn was surprised by this but quickly realized that Pippen wanted to play tag, not to mention he hit Aragorn so he had to get him back. Aragorn gets up and runs at Pippen. Pippen dodges him and Aragorn runs into the wall with a thud. The other hobbits wake up with the sound of Aragorn falling to the ground.
He gets back up and runs at Pippen again, even though his nose is now bleeding. He tackles Pippen and gives a nooky. "NOOKY!" Aragorn screams.
"Ouch! My head hurts!" Pippen yells.
"Well so does mine! And you're IT!" Aragorn yells and runs away from the hobbit.
Pippen runs over to Merry and tags him, he tags Frodo, who tags Sam, who tags Aragorn, who tags Merry, and so on. They had so much fun that day. Sam and Frodo did tag each other back and forth for about 15 minutes at one point, but at least they didn't fight.
The fifth day was the turning point in this drama. They went from relatively happy to paranoid and possibly crazy. That morning was extremely odd. They woke up to the sound of Sam yelling at Pippen. "Did you touch my sword?" he asks the hobbit.
"No!" he says while covering his hurt hand.
"Then how did you hurt your hand?"
"I didn't! What you talking about?"
"Pippen! Why did you touch my sword?"
"It was taunting me! I couldn't resist! It was saying 'touch me Pippen, you know you want to, come on take me from Sam, come on!' That's what it was saying."
"Fine then let me have your sword if mine wants you!"
"No! You can't have it!" Pippen says as he clutches his sword.
The others are very confused. What has gotten into them. Maybe they finally cracked. All of them will crack soon.
"Merry, did you touch this leaf?" Frodo asks him.
"I don't know!"
"It feels like you touched it!"
"So what if I did?"
"This is my leaf!"
"No it's mine!"
"No mine!" they argue like this for a few minutes grabbing the leaf back and forth then Sam and Pippen run over to them. "You two ripped this leaf!" they yelled holding up a torn leaf.
"Uh no!" they argue.
"Uh yeah!" Sam and Pippen demand.
"I wonder if the leaf would mend itself!" Pippen exclaims.
"Let's see!" and so they sit and watch that torn leaf of Lorien. Aragorn is just sitting staring at the hobbits and shacking his head. He is starting to feel the pressure of situation also. But he won't crack until the next day.
"It's not working!" Merry decides.
"It will!" the others demand. And so they lay and watch the torn leaf until they fall asleep. Aragorn takes it and sends it out one of the peep holes. They are very scared by this in the morning.
Pippen wakes up first on the sixth day. He looks for the leaf, but can't find it. "Where'd it go?!" he yells waking up the others.
"What?" Aragorn asks.
"The leaf has disappeared! Do you think that it grew little legs while we were asleep?"
"Don't count on it Pip," Merry tells him.
"Wait!" Aragorn demands, but it's too late. The hobbits start accusing each other.
"You took it didn't you Frodo," Sam suggests.
"I did not!"
"Maybe we watched it so much that it got scared and ran away with it's new legs," Pippen suggests.
"Leaves don't walk Pippen...or do they?" Merry says.
"If you would let me explain..." Aragorn says but they won't listen.
"You took it!" "No you!" they accuse each other for a while then Aragorn gets their attention "Ale!" Aragorn yells.
"Where?" they yell quickly turning toward him.
"There's no ale, but I know what happened to the leaf," he tells them.
"So you took it," they say and start to walk towards him.
"I sent it threw one of the peep holes."
"We'll take that as a confession of guilt," Frodo demands. The hobbits grab Aragorn and tie him up with vines placing him in a corner. "Let me explain!" Aragorn demands.
"You took our leaf! What further explanation can you give?"
"Well..you see..um.." Aragorn tries, but the hobbits put a vine across is mouth so he can't talk.
"What should we do with the traitor?" Merry asks.
"Let's dump his head in the fountain!" Pippen demands.
"No, let's take his sword and throw it through the peep hole," Sam suggests.
"Ok!" they say and take Aragorn's sword from it's scabbard, and throw it through a hole in the wall. It lands in the tree just a few feet from their reach. Aragorn lets out a muffled scream and anger begins to build up inside of him.
"Now what? Let's pull out his leg hair," Merry suggests.
"No, that's just too much! Let's sing the annoying song," Frodo decides.
"Yeah! Which one is that?" Pippen asks.
"It goes 'I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves. I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, and this is how it goes." Frodo sings.
"So how does it go?" Pippen asks.
"That's how it goes Pip." Merry tells him.
"Oh." Pippen says, and they sing the song for hours.
Aragorn just keeps thinking "I'm not listening! I'm not listening!"
After a while dinner was served and the serving elf looks at Aragorn and just shacks him head. "HELP!" Aragorn thinks with no luck, the elf leaves and he is again stuck with the hobbits.
"Should we feed him?" Merry asks.
"Yes, even a traitor needs food." Frodo decides. They walk over to him with the food and take the vine out of his mouth. "You four are dead when I get untied!" he says and they put the vine back in his mouth.
"Now let's try again," Sam tells him and takes the vine out of his mouth.
"You had better untie me now Sam! Or I'll hurt you!" Sam puts the vine in his mouth again.
"You know Strider, that isn't an incentive for us to untie you," Sam tells him. "Now would you like some food or not?" he asks and Aragorn shakes his head yes.
So Sam takes it off again. "You're going to die if my sword is broken! Do you..." Aragorn tries but Sam stuffs some food in his mouth. It takes an hour for him to finish because he won't shut up. They leave him tied up all night and the next day he is not in a good mood.
So the sixth day of confinement began uneasily. Breakfast came and Aragorn decides to trick the hobbits to let him go.
"Here comes the birdie!" Pippen says as he unties Aragorn's mouth and tries to feed him.
"Pippen, if you untie me I promise I won't hurt you." Aragorn tries. Pippen thinks for a second and decides to beleive him "OK!" Pippen says and unties Aragorn and is deceived.
Aragorn stands up and the hobbits look up at him. It becomes dead silent in that room. Aragorn is looking down at his wrists and rubbing them where the vines were. Suddenly he looks up and says "Run!"
The hobbits run from him as he chases them around the room. He catches them one by one and ties them up with the same vines that he had been tied with. Although he did not tie their mouths. He leaves them in a corner while he goes to the place where they threw his sword out. "It's just a few feet away stuck in the tree! If it is chipped you four are dead!" he threatens and tries his hardest to get the sword the rest of the night but can't reach it.
Meanwhile the hobbits are talking to one another. "Why did you untie him Pip?" Merry asks.
"He tricked me!"
"Sam why did you suggest that we throw his sword out?" Frodo asks.
"I don't know, it seamed like a good idea at the time."
"Ooo, I'm gonna kill you if Aragorn doesn't!"
"Bring it on!" Sam tells him.
"I would if I could move."
Aragorn leaves them tied for the whole night, their last night together. The next morning it becomes evident to the hobbits that Aragorn has not only been up all night, but he has also lost it! He keeps pacing and talking to himself. Constantly trying to reach his sword. It goes on like this all morning.
At noon lunch is brought, but none eat. Aragorn is too upset and psycho, and he won't untie the hobbits so they can eat. At about 3 P.M. Aragorn has a total melt down. He sits with his back against the corner rocking and biting his thumb nails. He is also talking to himself, about his sword and about how to kill the hobbits.
Finally 168 hours have passed. At four o'clock Monday after noon Celeborn and Galadriel walk in the room to a strange sight. The hobbits tied up in the corner to the right of the door, and Aragorn rocking in the left, far corner. "I don't want to know!" Galadriel tells Celeborn at this sight.
"Have you five learned anything from this?" Celeborn asks.
"Uh huh Uh huh!" Aragorn says still rocking and biting his thumb "Never trust hobbits, no never, very untrustworthy, uh huh! That's what they are! Very!"
"Guards untie the hobbits," Galadriel demands "Do I need to know why you four were tied up?"
"Well.." Frodo begins.
"I'll tell you why," Aragorn says and gets up. He walks over to the hole that they threw his sword through. "They put my sword down there!" he points outside of the hole. "Look it's right there..look..I can't reach it," he says as he tries to reach it threw the hole"..it's right there!"
Aragorn does eventually get his sword back and he chased and tackled the hobbits giving them all wedgies for doing what they did. Yet, they still protest that it's his fault for taking and throwing out their leaf!
Chapter 3 - A Week Together
A/N: Yes I know this chapter is extremely long, but it's hilarious! It gets better as you go, I promise! And just to remind you, none of these characters are my own. I didn't make Lorien either, although I would like to live their if it were a place on Earth.
The four hobbits and man are taken to a room within one of the trees. This will be their room for the next week. It's not too bad. It has a fountain for drinking and bathing, food will be brought to them, the only contact they will have with anyone outside that room. There are five feather mattresses lying upon the floor.
The walls are made up of branches, leaves, and vines of green and gold. The floor is of elven carved wood. There are several small windows throughout the walls, but none are big enough for really seeing anything. There is only one entrance into or out of this room. It can be blocked by a vine door or guarded by well guards.
They are taken by Galadriel and Celeborn to this room at 4 o'clock Monday afternoon. It's only 168 hours that they have to endure each other, yeah only!
"I hope you have fun!" Galadriel tells them, with a smerk on her face.
"Try not to kill each other! It takes too much time to clean up," Celeborn tells them half jocking.
And so the vine door is shut. They will not step foot out of that room for one whole week. What will happen?
"Well, since we are stuck in here together we should make the best of it." Aragorn tells them.
"This is all your fault Frodo!" Sam yells.
"Sam we shouldn't fight," he says "But stop blaming stuff on me!" he lunges at Sam but is stopped by Aragorn.
"You two will not fight! I don't know what started this, but you two had better knock it off!" Aragorn yells at them.
"He started it!" they yell at each other.
"Why do you two keep doing this? You're supposed to be freinds, not fighters. Come on forgive and forget!" Pippen tells them as they sit in opposite corners with Pippen standing in the middle of the room.
"I'll apologize as soon as he does," Sam said
"Yeah well, I'm not apologizing until he does." Frodo says.
"Well, that didn't work!" Merry says.
The first day passed slowly and without much change in the attitudes of two hobbits. They don't even know what started this feud any more, but they just know that they should fight for some weird hobbit reason. All that day Aragorn sat in a corner sharpening his sword. Merry and Pippen talked in a corner and Frodo and Sam were in the other two corners doing nothing really. Sam was counting the seconds until they get out of there. Frodo was thinking about the journey ahead and about his ring.
The morning of the second day began with the sound of Sam and Frodo yelling at each other.
"Shut up!" Aragorn yells "Just shut up!"
"I think Aragorn is mad at Sam and Frodo!" Pippen tells Merry.
"No duh Pip," Merry tells him.
The rest of that day passed relatively fast. Merry, Pippen and Sam talked together. Aragorn and Frodo talk together. The talking seems to take away from the passing hours. They talk about everything from Shire tales to their adventure ahead.
The next, third, day begins with the sound of singing. Aragorn is singing a sweet, slow love song as he sits in the corner. "What are you singing?" Pippen askes him.
"A song about the Evenstar. The most beautiful elf." Aragorn tells them.
"Hey isn't that Elrond's daughter?" Sam asks.
"Yes, and Galdriel's grand-daughter," Aragorn tells them.
"Hey, so Aragorn you got a thing for this elf?" Merry suggests.
"Not really a 'thing', per say," Aragorn says blushing bright as a rose.
"Aragorn has a girlfriend, Aragorn has a girlfriend, Strider has a girlfriend..," they shant while dancing around in a circle, the four of them together.
"Leave me alone!" Aragorn demanded blushing even brighter.
Sam and Frodo became suddenly aware that they were dancing side by side. They quickly stopped and retreated to their own feather mattress. "If you two will get along, you can keep teasing me."
"Aragorn has a girlfreind!" they yell out once again, and are silent for the rest of that day and night.
The sound of water splashing woke Frodo up from a day dream. Pippen has gone to the fountain and begun to splash water at the four others. They quickly get up and retaliate. All that day they have a water war. It's hard to tell who actually won, considering they were all soaked and laughing by the end of the day. Even Sam and Frodo were laughing together by the end of it.
The rest of that day they spent drying off and talking together. Sam and Frodo even seamed to forget about their feud for that day. They were all just happy to have some fun.
The fourth day began by Pippen coming over to Aragorn and hitting his head saying "You're it!" and running away from him. Aragorn was surprised by this but quickly realized that Pippen wanted to play tag, not to mention he hit Aragorn so he had to get him back. Aragorn gets up and runs at Pippen. Pippen dodges him and Aragorn runs into the wall with a thud. The other hobbits wake up with the sound of Aragorn falling to the ground.
He gets back up and runs at Pippen again, even though his nose is now bleeding. He tackles Pippen and gives a nooky. "NOOKY!" Aragorn screams.
"Ouch! My head hurts!" Pippen yells.
"Well so does mine! And you're IT!" Aragorn yells and runs away from the hobbit.
Pippen runs over to Merry and tags him, he tags Frodo, who tags Sam, who tags Aragorn, who tags Merry, and so on. They had so much fun that day. Sam and Frodo did tag each other back and forth for about 15 minutes at one point, but at least they didn't fight.
The fifth day was the turning point in this drama. They went from relatively happy to paranoid and possibly crazy. That morning was extremely odd. They woke up to the sound of Sam yelling at Pippen. "Did you touch my sword?" he asks the hobbit.
"No!" he says while covering his hurt hand.
"Then how did you hurt your hand?"
"I didn't! What you talking about?"
"Pippen! Why did you touch my sword?"
"It was taunting me! I couldn't resist! It was saying 'touch me Pippen, you know you want to, come on take me from Sam, come on!' That's what it was saying."
"Fine then let me have your sword if mine wants you!"
"No! You can't have it!" Pippen says as he clutches his sword.
The others are very confused. What has gotten into them. Maybe they finally cracked. All of them will crack soon.
"Merry, did you touch this leaf?" Frodo asks him.
"I don't know!"
"It feels like you touched it!"
"So what if I did?"
"This is my leaf!"
"No it's mine!"
"No mine!" they argue like this for a few minutes grabbing the leaf back and forth then Sam and Pippen run over to them. "You two ripped this leaf!" they yelled holding up a torn leaf.
"Uh no!" they argue.
"Uh yeah!" Sam and Pippen demand.
"I wonder if the leaf would mend itself!" Pippen exclaims.
"Let's see!" and so they sit and watch that torn leaf of Lorien. Aragorn is just sitting staring at the hobbits and shacking his head. He is starting to feel the pressure of situation also. But he won't crack until the next day.
"It's not working!" Merry decides.
"It will!" the others demand. And so they lay and watch the torn leaf until they fall asleep. Aragorn takes it and sends it out one of the peep holes. They are very scared by this in the morning.
Pippen wakes up first on the sixth day. He looks for the leaf, but can't find it. "Where'd it go?!" he yells waking up the others.
"What?" Aragorn asks.
"The leaf has disappeared! Do you think that it grew little legs while we were asleep?"
"Don't count on it Pip," Merry tells him.
"Wait!" Aragorn demands, but it's too late. The hobbits start accusing each other.
"You took it didn't you Frodo," Sam suggests.
"I did not!"
"Maybe we watched it so much that it got scared and ran away with it's new legs," Pippen suggests.
"Leaves don't walk Pippen...or do they?" Merry says.
"If you would let me explain..." Aragorn says but they won't listen.
"You took it!" "No you!" they accuse each other for a while then Aragorn gets their attention "Ale!" Aragorn yells.
"Where?" they yell quickly turning toward him.
"There's no ale, but I know what happened to the leaf," he tells them.
"So you took it," they say and start to walk towards him.
"I sent it threw one of the peep holes."
"We'll take that as a confession of guilt," Frodo demands. The hobbits grab Aragorn and tie him up with vines placing him in a corner. "Let me explain!" Aragorn demands.
"You took our leaf! What further explanation can you give?"
"Well..you see..um.." Aragorn tries, but the hobbits put a vine across is mouth so he can't talk.
"What should we do with the traitor?" Merry asks.
"Let's dump his head in the fountain!" Pippen demands.
"No, let's take his sword and throw it through the peep hole," Sam suggests.
"Ok!" they say and take Aragorn's sword from it's scabbard, and throw it through a hole in the wall. It lands in the tree just a few feet from their reach. Aragorn lets out a muffled scream and anger begins to build up inside of him.
"Now what? Let's pull out his leg hair," Merry suggests.
"No, that's just too much! Let's sing the annoying song," Frodo decides.
"Yeah! Which one is that?" Pippen asks.
"It goes 'I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves. I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, and this is how it goes." Frodo sings.
"So how does it go?" Pippen asks.
"That's how it goes Pip." Merry tells him.
"Oh." Pippen says, and they sing the song for hours.
Aragorn just keeps thinking "I'm not listening! I'm not listening!"
After a while dinner was served and the serving elf looks at Aragorn and just shacks him head. "HELP!" Aragorn thinks with no luck, the elf leaves and he is again stuck with the hobbits.
"Should we feed him?" Merry asks.
"Yes, even a traitor needs food." Frodo decides. They walk over to him with the food and take the vine out of his mouth. "You four are dead when I get untied!" he says and they put the vine back in his mouth.
"Now let's try again," Sam tells him and takes the vine out of his mouth.
"You had better untie me now Sam! Or I'll hurt you!" Sam puts the vine in his mouth again.
"You know Strider, that isn't an incentive for us to untie you," Sam tells him. "Now would you like some food or not?" he asks and Aragorn shakes his head yes.
So Sam takes it off again. "You're going to die if my sword is broken! Do you..." Aragorn tries but Sam stuffs some food in his mouth. It takes an hour for him to finish because he won't shut up. They leave him tied up all night and the next day he is not in a good mood.
So the sixth day of confinement began uneasily. Breakfast came and Aragorn decides to trick the hobbits to let him go.
"Here comes the birdie!" Pippen says as he unties Aragorn's mouth and tries to feed him.
"Pippen, if you untie me I promise I won't hurt you." Aragorn tries. Pippen thinks for a second and decides to beleive him "OK!" Pippen says and unties Aragorn and is deceived.
Aragorn stands up and the hobbits look up at him. It becomes dead silent in that room. Aragorn is looking down at his wrists and rubbing them where the vines were. Suddenly he looks up and says "Run!"
The hobbits run from him as he chases them around the room. He catches them one by one and ties them up with the same vines that he had been tied with. Although he did not tie their mouths. He leaves them in a corner while he goes to the place where they threw his sword out. "It's just a few feet away stuck in the tree! If it is chipped you four are dead!" he threatens and tries his hardest to get the sword the rest of the night but can't reach it.
Meanwhile the hobbits are talking to one another. "Why did you untie him Pip?" Merry asks.
"He tricked me!"
"Sam why did you suggest that we throw his sword out?" Frodo asks.
"I don't know, it seamed like a good idea at the time."
"Ooo, I'm gonna kill you if Aragorn doesn't!"
"Bring it on!" Sam tells him.
"I would if I could move."
Aragorn leaves them tied for the whole night, their last night together. The next morning it becomes evident to the hobbits that Aragorn has not only been up all night, but he has also lost it! He keeps pacing and talking to himself. Constantly trying to reach his sword. It goes on like this all morning.
At noon lunch is brought, but none eat. Aragorn is too upset and psycho, and he won't untie the hobbits so they can eat. At about 3 P.M. Aragorn has a total melt down. He sits with his back against the corner rocking and biting his thumb nails. He is also talking to himself, about his sword and about how to kill the hobbits.
Finally 168 hours have passed. At four o'clock Monday after noon Celeborn and Galadriel walk in the room to a strange sight. The hobbits tied up in the corner to the right of the door, and Aragorn rocking in the left, far corner. "I don't want to know!" Galadriel tells Celeborn at this sight.
"Have you five learned anything from this?" Celeborn asks.
"Uh huh Uh huh!" Aragorn says still rocking and biting his thumb "Never trust hobbits, no never, very untrustworthy, uh huh! That's what they are! Very!"
"Guards untie the hobbits," Galadriel demands "Do I need to know why you four were tied up?"
"Well.." Frodo begins.
"I'll tell you why," Aragorn says and gets up. He walks over to the hole that they threw his sword through. "They put my sword down there!" he points outside of the hole. "Look it's right there..look..I can't reach it," he says as he tries to reach it threw the hole"..it's right there!"
Aragorn does eventually get his sword back and he chased and tackled the hobbits giving them all wedgies for doing what they did. Yet, they still protest that it's his fault for taking and throwing out their leaf!
