The Forest Thingy
[The scene opens back on the field surrounded by trees.]
Ben: This field thing sucks.
Brittaney: We need to get to thinking about what we are going to do.
Captain Amando: Zzzzzz.
Collin: Will she ever wake up?
Deke: It looks like we have to do it.
Dr. Butorac: Turtles taste good.
Jan: Ewwwwwww! Why do you eat turtles? They're reptile things.
Jessica: IHOP does sound good right now, Deke.
Kara: Hey, Mike, watch. [She turns into a giant black bear.]
Karmon: I think I want to be drum major again next year.
Kasey: Me too. And I want to be, again, in the jaz. never mind.
Kurt: I am the band president! Hahaha!!
Kyle: I'm tired.
Mike: That's my Kara. Oh, why isn't anybody focusing on our goal? We need to get the ding-ding back.
Mrs. Childers: Mike, as your lesson teacher, I am ready to teach you 'super C.' It will be most helpful in the battle to come.
Narrator: I suggest you walk into the forest. You might find some helpful stuff in there, and maybe some allies.
Russell: I. like. you. Kasey.
Vikki: You really are hopeless, Russell.
Mike: I'm going into the forest. You can come with me if you want.
[Mike walks into the forest followed by Jan, Kara (after she has changed back into a human), Deke, and Brittaney. As soon as they walk about ten feet into the forest, a huge gang of small, furry men jump out from behind the trees.]
Brittaney: What are these things?
Head Small-Furry-Man-Thing: Us are G-gnomes. Us make you look how you do. Us know what you go for. Us help disguise you. Us make you look not same.
Jan: How are you going to do that?
Leader of the G-gnomes: Us not show here. Us take you to place of hiding, where are lots of we there. Us magic stronger there. Us are ones who give looks to all ones in the world. Us have not-normal powers.
Deke [whispering to Mike]: They could have at least learned to talk like normal people do.
Kara: Come on people. Let's take them back to the others.
Short G-gnome: Us can no go out of trees. Them visit here.
[The group calls to the other waiting in the field and they walk over and are introduced. Afterwards, they all go to Double Helix, the G-gnome city.]
Karmon: Look at the spirals!
Kasey: Aren't they beautiful, Russell?
Russell: Yeah. sure.
Head G-gnome: Me take you to my codon now so rest you can.
Kurt: What's a codon?
Narrator: It is the house of a G-gnome. Just as in DNA a strand has many codons carrying countless genomes so was the forest created in this likeness by the author.
Kara [in complete awe]: It's the al-mighty Author of the story!
[The Author appears out of the thinnish-thick air in the forest.]
Author: I have been called here by the mention of my name. Why did you say it?
Narrator: I was just explaining to the group about the forest.
Author: Silence! I was talking to Kara.
Kara: Well I saw you appear here and I think you are a sexy pappa!
Collin: Umm. Mr. Author, sir, why am I in this story?
Author: Thank you Kara. You are in this story because I wrote so, Collin.
Captain Amando: I'm awake again. What's going on?
Ben: I'm tired as a mofo!
Deke: Your hot, Ben.
Mike: DEKE!!!
Jan: I can't stand it anymore. BBBBBLLLLLAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!
Kyle: Oh goodness, not again.
Brittaney: I want to kill Scott again! I didn't get all my anger and frustration out the first time.
Russell: I can't say it, Kasey. I'm sorry. I still like you though.
Kasey: But I love you, Russell. Why don't you love me?
Narrator: 'Russell says that he doesn't love Kasey because he's gay.'
Russell: Because I'm ga.
Author: Scratch that. Hahaha! You forgot, I have more power than you, Narrator!
Deke: I can't help it, Mike. He is hot.
Mike: Yeah, you're right.
Jessica: Argness!
Brittaney: What's wrong, Jessica?
Scott's Ghost: It's that time of the month.
[Brittaney and Jessica chase the ghost and force it to cross over to the other side.]
Jan: I'm glad I got that out of my system. blahness.
Kara: It's awesome blossome, Jan.
Karmon: La di da.
Kasey: It's ok, Russell.
Russell: Thank you, Kasey.
Narrator: Dang you, Author. Why do you always have to show off your powers when we are in front of people?
Kurt: Ahhhhh. the Band Presidentness!
Mrs. Childers: Here it goes. [Super 'C' comes out of her instrument and everybody drops down to the ground.]
Author: Because I can, you big stupid head!
Head G-gnome: Are you people going to listen to my stupid self!?
Dr. Butorac: You talked right!
Narrator: Technically, that would be, "You said that correctly."
Author: Shut up, you retard, before I take you out of the story.
Vikki: Watcha' doin', Kurt?
Kurt: I'm attempting to re-tune my tromboner.
Mike: Shouldn't that be 'trombone'?
Kurt: Well, yeah, I guess so. Almost there.
Deke: I still love you, Mike.
Kara: Awwwww. how sweet.
Mrs. Childers: Sorry about that, guys.
Ben: Its' ok with me. You need to practice it anyways.
Mrs. Childers: What do you mean by that?
Kyle: What do you mean by 'you people'?
Ben: Nothing.
Everyone minus Kyle: KYLE!
Kyle: Sorry.
Kurt: I've got it. Here we go everyone.
[They all step through the bell again and the view goes black.]
Head G-gnome: Yoos not letting we help yoos.
[The scene opens back on the field surrounded by trees.]
Ben: This field thing sucks.
Brittaney: We need to get to thinking about what we are going to do.
Captain Amando: Zzzzzz.
Collin: Will she ever wake up?
Deke: It looks like we have to do it.
Dr. Butorac: Turtles taste good.
Jan: Ewwwwwww! Why do you eat turtles? They're reptile things.
Jessica: IHOP does sound good right now, Deke.
Kara: Hey, Mike, watch. [She turns into a giant black bear.]
Karmon: I think I want to be drum major again next year.
Kasey: Me too. And I want to be, again, in the jaz. never mind.
Kurt: I am the band president! Hahaha!!
Kyle: I'm tired.
Mike: That's my Kara. Oh, why isn't anybody focusing on our goal? We need to get the ding-ding back.
Mrs. Childers: Mike, as your lesson teacher, I am ready to teach you 'super C.' It will be most helpful in the battle to come.
Narrator: I suggest you walk into the forest. You might find some helpful stuff in there, and maybe some allies.
Russell: I. like. you. Kasey.
Vikki: You really are hopeless, Russell.
Mike: I'm going into the forest. You can come with me if you want.
[Mike walks into the forest followed by Jan, Kara (after she has changed back into a human), Deke, and Brittaney. As soon as they walk about ten feet into the forest, a huge gang of small, furry men jump out from behind the trees.]
Brittaney: What are these things?
Head Small-Furry-Man-Thing: Us are G-gnomes. Us make you look how you do. Us know what you go for. Us help disguise you. Us make you look not same.
Jan: How are you going to do that?
Leader of the G-gnomes: Us not show here. Us take you to place of hiding, where are lots of we there. Us magic stronger there. Us are ones who give looks to all ones in the world. Us have not-normal powers.
Deke [whispering to Mike]: They could have at least learned to talk like normal people do.
Kara: Come on people. Let's take them back to the others.
Short G-gnome: Us can no go out of trees. Them visit here.
[The group calls to the other waiting in the field and they walk over and are introduced. Afterwards, they all go to Double Helix, the G-gnome city.]
Karmon: Look at the spirals!
Kasey: Aren't they beautiful, Russell?
Russell: Yeah. sure.
Head G-gnome: Me take you to my codon now so rest you can.
Kurt: What's a codon?
Narrator: It is the house of a G-gnome. Just as in DNA a strand has many codons carrying countless genomes so was the forest created in this likeness by the author.
Kara [in complete awe]: It's the al-mighty Author of the story!
[The Author appears out of the thinnish-thick air in the forest.]
Author: I have been called here by the mention of my name. Why did you say it?
Narrator: I was just explaining to the group about the forest.
Author: Silence! I was talking to Kara.
Kara: Well I saw you appear here and I think you are a sexy pappa!
Collin: Umm. Mr. Author, sir, why am I in this story?
Author: Thank you Kara. You are in this story because I wrote so, Collin.
Captain Amando: I'm awake again. What's going on?
Ben: I'm tired as a mofo!
Deke: Your hot, Ben.
Mike: DEKE!!!
Jan: I can't stand it anymore. BBBBBLLLLLAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!
Kyle: Oh goodness, not again.
Brittaney: I want to kill Scott again! I didn't get all my anger and frustration out the first time.
Russell: I can't say it, Kasey. I'm sorry. I still like you though.
Kasey: But I love you, Russell. Why don't you love me?
Narrator: 'Russell says that he doesn't love Kasey because he's gay.'
Russell: Because I'm ga.
Author: Scratch that. Hahaha! You forgot, I have more power than you, Narrator!
Deke: I can't help it, Mike. He is hot.
Mike: Yeah, you're right.
Jessica: Argness!
Brittaney: What's wrong, Jessica?
Scott's Ghost: It's that time of the month.
[Brittaney and Jessica chase the ghost and force it to cross over to the other side.]
Jan: I'm glad I got that out of my system. blahness.
Kara: It's awesome blossome, Jan.
Karmon: La di da.
Kasey: It's ok, Russell.
Russell: Thank you, Kasey.
Narrator: Dang you, Author. Why do you always have to show off your powers when we are in front of people?
Kurt: Ahhhhh. the Band Presidentness!
Mrs. Childers: Here it goes. [Super 'C' comes out of her instrument and everybody drops down to the ground.]
Author: Because I can, you big stupid head!
Head G-gnome: Are you people going to listen to my stupid self!?
Dr. Butorac: You talked right!
Narrator: Technically, that would be, "You said that correctly."
Author: Shut up, you retard, before I take you out of the story.
Vikki: Watcha' doin', Kurt?
Kurt: I'm attempting to re-tune my tromboner.
Mike: Shouldn't that be 'trombone'?
Kurt: Well, yeah, I guess so. Almost there.
Deke: I still love you, Mike.
Kara: Awwwww. how sweet.
Mrs. Childers: Sorry about that, guys.
Ben: Its' ok with me. You need to practice it anyways.
Mrs. Childers: What do you mean by that?
Kyle: What do you mean by 'you people'?
Ben: Nothing.
Everyone minus Kyle: KYLE!
Kyle: Sorry.
Kurt: I've got it. Here we go everyone.
[They all step through the bell again and the view goes black.]
Head G-gnome: Yoos not letting we help yoos.
