Disclaimer: Okay the same thing, I don't own anything you recognize. Thanks to EVERYONE who reviewed, all your reviews mean lots. I want to specially thank my first three reviewers and Dude where's my cheese? They are sefie, Angelxd14 and AineRose, go read sefie's fic, it's really good. (

Okay, I read through my chapters and realized that everything is just way too shallow. I apologize for that. I think I'll go in depth from now on, but I'll probably fail so heck. On with this story.OH! And I think I'll increase the length of the chapters.

Chapter 6: Falling

James gently shut the door, after slipping out. His messy black hair got even messier, after he ran his fingers through it, as he made his way to nowhere in particular, just away from the dormitory. When they wrote a reply to the mysterious writer of letters, the owl would head straight for him, and then there would be trouble.

James was feeling rather depressed. He had spent 4 years of his Hogwarts schooling in denial. He knew he had always had this thing for Lily, smart girl and firecracker that she was. He smiled goofily as he thought about how Lily was like, how Lily always had a comeback ready and everything. But he knew that Lily could never like him, James Potter, egoistical prick, insensitive bastard.he had heard all those cutting remarks before. He knew Lily was a play girl, just like how he was a playboy. They both knew how annoying clingy people could get, and on a few rare occasions, they had even had a decent conversation.

The pillow fight scene flashed through his head, and he sighed happily. Lily had been so close, smiling, for once at him, not laughing or insulting him. He knew he had fallen hard for Lily, but he thought he had overcome that infatuation by dating the female population of Hogwarts. He had never felt safe or actually loved by any of them. They just loved his popularity, his fame, and perhaps that was all he was. He looked sadly at the ground, yes, that was all he was. Just an image.

"Don't be so pessimistic James," He chided himself, but he could not help but think of what his mother had screamed to him before she had been killed by Voldermort. How James had spent nights crying over what she had said. "JAMES! GO! RUN! I LOVE YOU, DON'T LET ME DOWN!" After that, Voldermort had cursed her with the killing curse, and James saw his mother keel to her knees, and then slump, dead. Voldermort just cackled evilly, his red eyes flashing.This all happened last year, and he had just blocked it out. He felt that he just couldn't cry, and was he a bad son for not being able to cry? Was he so heartless that he could not cry? His father had died shortly after he was born, in some freak accident. But the more he thought of it, the more it seemed likely that his father had been murdered by Voldermort. All the pieces fit, his father had died in perfect health, he was young when it happened, so maybe the "freak accident" was just some pathetic excuse.

"Pathetic." He muttered to himself. He envied Sirius's life to no end. Sirius had a wonderful family, two older sisters and a perfect life. He managed to keep everyone loving him, with the exceptions of a few Slytherins. He seemed to have the perfect life, everything went so smoothly for some people.

His feet seemed to be moving in the direction of the Astronomy Tower. He remembered coming here with all of his past flings, and he sat down on one of the stone chairs.

"Mum.why did you go? I love you so much, why did you leave? I need your help now, WHY DID YOU GO?" He started of softly and then gradually increased in volume till he yelled the last part, tears welling up in his chocolate brown eyes, and slowly trickling down his face in copious streams, falling to the ground. He curled up into a ball, rocking silently.

MEANWHILE.

"Well what are you going to write? You can't just SIT there STONING!" Pressed Becky, as she sat with Lily on the floor of the dorm.

"I CAN! And I am doing that right now if you haven't noticed." Lily droned, doing a neat Professor Binns imitation.

"Creepy, don't Binn-out, that's just sad." Sirius sighed, as he looked around, hands itching for something to do.

Kim was tending to the owl, petting and cooing at it, until Remus couldn't stand it anymore. "WHY DON'T' YOU JUST PROPOSE TO THE DAMN THING?" He roared, after Kim asked him for the thousandth time whether the owl was cute or not.

"Well, I would but it's an owl!" Kim pointed out, most sensibly. Remus gave Kim a worried look but decided that Kim must have always been like that, on a permanent sugar high or something.

"This room is so dirty!" Remus observed, pointing out the obvious, which according to Sirius, Remus did quite often.

"Er yes.you just noticed?" Kim asked, "you can't be serious? And if you even DARE crack the Sirius Serious joke I will kill you."

"DAMN!" could be heard from Becky and Lily at the same time.

"How should I start the letter? Dear? To? Dearest?" Lily inquired, addressing the whole room.

"Dear, dearest sounds way too needy, and to is too formal. Dear isn't too bad, stick with that." Kim suggested, stroking the owl lovingly.

"Then?! After dear? I just can't say, "dear admirer, love Lily, can I?" Demanded Lily, growing impatient, her famous redhead temper kicking in.

"Well you could I suppose, but I would think that girl was one hell of a weird freak, not to mention terribly eloquent. How about WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?" Sirius gave his input, earning a smack from Becky.

"Lily needs to be ROMANTIC! He's so ROMANTIC!" Becky squealed, "You're so lucky Lily!"

"Tell you what, Sirius, you write it okay? You have this way with words that can charm all the ladies." Lily gave up writing the letter, much to Becky's protests, "You can't let that blob of fats write a LOVE LETTER?"

Sirius was delighted as he stuck his tongue out at Becky and wrote in his best handwriting quite a decent letter.

Sirius cleared his throat and read it out:

"Dear admirer,

I'm flattered that you think of me in that way, but it would help if I knew who you were. Give me a clue at least, and I'll be eternally grateful. I'm writing this, not Lily as she's way too shy,"

"WHAT?!" Lily interrupted, you SO did not write that SIRIUS!" She moaned, and put her head in her hands, "I totally suck at love stuff."

"I was just kidding Lily dearest, now let me continue." Sirius consoled Lily, and continued with the letter, which you had to give Sirius credit for, it was rather good.

"I'll give the letter to Flame, that Ravenclaw owl seems rather out of it," Lily decided, as she prepared to leave to get her owl.

"It's okay, use mine." Sirius volunteered, and called, "Toad!" A tawny brown owl flew to Sirius and stood very still as Sirius tied the parchment to its foot. "Go to this admirer person. I'm sure you know don't you? Some owl instinct I suppose. You might also want to tell me how the weather is wh.." Sirius babbled on and on, until Lily interrupted.

"Just send your damn toad out of the window."

"Touchy, touchy." Sirius tutted, before dodging Lily's slap.

MEANWHILE.

James felt much better, after crying it all out, he felt as if a huge burden had been lifted off his young shoulders. A brown owl swooped through the window in the tower and landed in front of James. James recognized the owl to be toad, and smiled at it, untying the parchment and reading it. He sighed, wondering if Lily could ever say anything like that to him, ever.

He stuffed the crumpled parchment into his pocket and ambled back to the common room, feeling much better.

The next few weeks passed without much event, except for the fact that the Halloween Ball was coming, and Halloween was one of the biggest events in Hogwarts. Everyone was looking forward to it, and a special Hogsmead trip was organized so that the female population could go shopping and the male population could get dragged along to help carry packages.

Lily and her "admirer" kept up the letter writing, and the letters steadily got more romantic, and more serious. Lily wrote her own letters, and even admitted to her admirer that Sirius had written the first one for her. Lily was in better moods these few days, because she was in love with this admirer. She would fantasize about who this "Prince Charming" was. She was waiting for him to ask her to the Ball, and as also busy setting Kim and Remus up. It was quite obvious they liked each other, although they bickered a lot. Lessons were a breeze, and Lily was basically in the seventh heaven of delight.

"Good day Potter!" Lily could even be nice to that egoistical jerk, James. It wasn't like she really resented James, she just wasn't' good friends with a boy who thought he was god's gift to womankind.

"Good day Evans!" James also seemed more cheerful nowadays, which was never a good thing, as that meant he played more pranks than usual. Lily was usually the butt of most of his jokes, but Lily felt that with the admirer on her side, she was invincible.

Lily was almost 100% sure that the admirer was a boy called Brian Bones from Ravenclaw. In the letters the admirer said, he said that he did not dare approach Lily for fear that Lily would reject him, so Lily had said they would both go stag, and meet at the ball, and then stay together.

Becky was going to the ball with this boy from Hufflepuff called Ivan Prose, whose name sounded more intelligent than he actually was. However, he was very sweet, and Becky, the hopeless romantic she was, enjoyed his sweetness.

Kim was stubbornly going to the ball with a boy from Ravenclaw called Royston Chang, whom Remus hated with a passion. It was obvious she was doing this purposely to irk Remus, and so far she was succeeding.

Sirius was going to the ball with yet another one of his barbies, those that have bigger breasts than brains. Peter was going stag along with James, whose reason was so that he could dance with all the girls he wanted.

James was putting on a front and he knew it. He was afraid Lily would find out that he was writing the letters and reject him, so he tried to make it look that he could not possibly like Lily. He accomplished this by being extra mean to her, insulting her at every opportunity. However, he knew that on the day of the Ball, he would have to reveal himself, and he was still planning on how to do it in a romantic way, one that would ensure Lily falling head over heels in love with him.

The Hogsmead trip drew closer, and girls were getting more excited, while boys were trying to make up excuses on why they couldn't possibly go. These ranged form sore backs to sore throats, and they always gave the girls a good kick to listen to all of their pathetic whining.

Of course, there was quidditch. Lily was training hard, and so was James. Kim, who was a beater, was excused from practice as she had sprained her wrist, and was going to act as commentator for their next match, which was after Halloween.

The day of the Hogsmead trip came, and excited girls and reluctant boys boarded the carriages which would lead them there. The marauders, minus Peter, who had fallen ill with flu (die rat die) were cramped into one carriage. They were talking merrily, topics ranging from dates to teachers, and potions to latest wizard music. There was a heated debate between Kim and Remus over quidditch teams, but since they always bickered, everyone basically ignored them. After the Hogsmead trip was the ball, so the girls were all planning to have manicures and all of their own girl stuff, while the boys planned to spend five minutes buying a tuxedo and then spending the rest of their time in the sweet shop or joke shop.

The girls split up with the boys, agreeing to meet up in the Three Broomsticks three hours later. The girls went into Madam Malkin's Robe shop to look for costumes, as the Halloween Ball was a costume ball this time.

"What are you going to go as, Lils?" Asked Kim, as she fished among the racks for a suitable costume.

"A pumpkin." Was Lily's reply, which caused Kim to drop the dress she was holding.

"Pleas tell me you're kidding!"

"I'm kidding."

"Thank God."

"Thank me too!"

"Thank you Lily."

"It's okay, I'm going as an angel," Lily answered, "what about you people?"

"Devil!" Kim replied, a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"Vampire, DEFINITELY." Becky decided, "I think I look like one."

"Er..okay." Was the general reply, and the girls shopped around, occasionally asking for each others' opinions.

Lily chose a lovely white dress made out of silk, with a back that went down to there but a high front. She also chose a pair of white shoes, and refused to model it for the other two.

Kim chose a red dress, which went to just above her knees. She chose high black leather boots. She modeled it for the girls, and received applause and cheering from the boys who popped by in time to see Kim strutting her stuff.

Becky chose a black dress, with a high collar. It was long and elegant, giving her a sophisticated look. That was all she said about her dress, because she, like Lily, was too modest to strut around in a costume in the middle of a store. Perhaps it wasn't modest, but smart.

They met in the sweet shop instead, where they sampled all kinds of sweets, and bought a huge packet of sweets, to contribute to the Gryffindor Candy Fund, which was the candy used at parties and other occasions.

After that, they trooped off to the three broomsticks, where they had butterbeer and a few tidbits, before the girls insisted they had to go back to get themselves ready. Moaning and groaning that they didn't even have time to get their manicures, the girls took the earlier carriage back, while the boys went to the joke shop, before taking the later carriage back.

IN SCHOOL.

"LILY! I NEED YOU TO TRANSFIGURE THIS STICK INTO MY PITCHFORK!" Kim yelled, as she threw Lily a stick. Lily was scribbling her "admirer" a note, but managed to catch the stick, using her chaser skills.

"I'll go ask James for help okay?" Lily knew better than to refuse a panicking Kim, as she wasn't a beater for nothing, even though she did have a sprained wrist.

She tied the parchment to her own owl, flame, and sent him to her admirer. After that, she grabbed the stick and marched over the boys room. She was wearing her white robes, and the halo was already attached to her head.

"James! Could you help me transfigure this stick into a pitchfork for Kim?" She begged James, who was rushing about looking for his shoes.

"Er, give me a second."James replied, as he looked around for his wand. They had both chatted amiably in Hogsmead, and were on generally good terms with one another.

Suddenly, Flame, the owl, flew into the dormitory through the open window, landed in front of James, and stretched out its leg, waiting for James to untie the parchment.

Lily's face turned white, as she stared at James, gaping, not believing what was happening to her. James! James was the ADMIRER! JAMES was the one sending all those notes! Then it dawned on her. It was ALL A JOKE! James was merely having some fun with Lily's feelings. James had always been against Lily's playgirl ways, and this was his way of showing it, BLOODY BASTARD! Tears flowing down her face, Lily turned away from James, and spat out, "It was all a joke wasn't it? Well congratulations, you hurt the "playgirl" Evans, hope you're happy!" With that, she turned to run out of the room, the urge to break down and sob was getting too great.

"NO LILY! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!" James desperately yelled, grabbing hold of Lily's arm, "It's not like that!"

"Was this for the PRANK I PLAYED ON YOU WITH LUCIUS? This is to humiliate me isn't it? ISN'T IT? I never, NEVER, thought you would sink so LOW! But obviously, I was wrong!" Lily hissed, turning red now, and she pulled out of James grasp, "don't' touch me." She managed to choke out.

"Lily! You just can't LEAVE ME!" He pleaded, "This is all a MISTAKE!"

"I can and I am!" Lily screeched, totally fed-up, and with those final words, she walked out of the dormitory, slamming the door behind her.