A Time for Us
Author: Orrymain
Author Email: marciastudley@comcast.net (Feedback welcome)
Category: Slash, Angst, Romance, Established Relationship
Pairing: Jack/Daniel .... and it's all J/D
Rating: PG-13
Season: 7
Spoilers: Fire and Water, Window of Opportunity, and Meridian (but nothing much really there to spoil for either show and nothing about glowy thingys!!)
Size: 28kb; short story
Written: July 20, 2003
Archive: Area52, Comfort Zone, FanFiction.Net, Cartouche, AlphaGate, TheBoy
Disclaimer: Usual disclaimers -- not mine, wish they were, especially Daniel, and Jack, too, but they aren't. This was a whim; all in fun. I don't have anything to do with them legally at all!
Summary: Jack is bored and wants to play; Daniel wants to finish reading a book; Together, they end up wondering if now is the time to stop hiding in plain sight. This is the 3rd in the "They Don't Understand" series. Each story can be read independently and can stand alone, however.
Notes:
1) Jack and Daniel are noted for having what I call double conversations. A simple "Jack" could mean several things, saying much more than just the name itself. A normal question like "what are you doing" could carry multiple connotations, including feelings, desires, fears, etc. At various points during this series, these double conversations are noted like this: "Actual Spoken Words" **(double dialogue meaning)**
2) Used with the author's permission, reference to Jack having taken Daniel dancing is from Devra's magnificent work, "The Last Dance" which is located at http://www.thealphagate.com/stories/LastDance.asp.
A Time for Us
By Orrymain
Their last mission was nothing especially worth noting, pretty much a standard meet and greet. No Goa'uld, alien technology, or beautiful but lonely natives to lust after Daniel, which pleased Jack greatly.
Now, they had some downtime, to relax and take care of things at the house. The happy couple had made slow and tender love last night, and began the new day with some serious making out before being interrupted by Mrs. Greenley, an elderly neighbor, needing some help with her plumbing. She had no one else, and was on a fixed income, so Jack had been her unofficial handyman for years.
With a certain regret, Jack left his lover to check out Mrs. Greenley's pipes.
When he returned, Daniel was occupied doing their laundry, so Jack busied himself with the weekly mowing of the lawn. He pulled a few weeds, repaired a fence post, and replaced one of the sprinkler heads which had met its demise the last time Jack had mowed the lawn.
Smiling as he adjusted the new sprayer, the Air Force Colonel recalled how his preoccupation with getting Daniel back into bed had been the reason for the destruction of the previous sprinkler head.
Satisfied with the yard work, hoping that his mind could stay focused enough on the remainder of his downtime chores to not destroy anything else, Jack expressed a silent chuckle, realizing that forcing himself not to think of Daniel, was more distracting than actually thinking about his lover.
When he went inside to grab a beer, Jack decided to check on Daniel, but couldn't find him. The laundry had been done, the sheets replaced on their bed, and Jack chuckled to notice Daniel had even dusted the bedroom furniture.
"That's My Daniel, Mr. Domestication," Jack mused to himself.
On a hunch, Jack checked the front yard and discovered his domesticated partner leaning over his car. The hood was open, Daniel's shirt was off, and his derriere was wiggling an invitation that Jack was eager to accept.
Jack approached his lover, who was swearing in one of the many languages he now spoke ("It was 23 when we met, must be at least 40 by now," Jack thought to himself).
Peeking around the street to make sure none of the neighbors were outside, Jack maneuvered his way behind Daniel, putting his arms around his lover's waist, and drawing him near. Daniel nearly jumped.
"Jack, don't do that!"
Jack retaliated by planting a long and devouring kiss on the younger man, and proceeded to coax him into the house. Daniel made a half-hearted attempt to continue his automobile maintenance, incoherently muttering something about needing to replace some lubricant, but the only lubricant Jack cared about was upstairs.
"It'll keep, Danny, " Jack urged as they moved on to the bedroom.
Some time later, after their mid-morning tryst into the heavens, Jack had run a few errands, while Daniel finished the work on his car and done some research on the internet. Sam had dropped by for a few minutes to show off her latest revamped motorcycle, and then Daniel played fireman, getting six-year old Cindy Herndon's cat out of tree.
Jack just shook his head, and uttered his usual, "Daniel, you never cease to amaze me with your talents." After that, Jack had a call from the General that took him out of Daniel's earshot for quite a while.
The young archaeologist determined he'd done enough work, and settled on to the couch, deciding this was the day he was going to finish reading John Steinbeck's "East of Eden". It was Oprah's Book of the Month, and Teal'c was insisting that Daniel read it so they could discuss it.
Teal'c never missed Oprah, videotaping the show even when SG-1 were off world. Ever since Jack had joked about being on the talk show as they left the Land of Light, the Jaffa had become fascinated by Oprah, and now, the talk show host had brought back her book club, and Teal'c was obsessed.
Daniel had never been one to read a lot of fiction, but turning down an intimidating Jaffa was not easy to do.
"You have something against reading this "East of Eden", DanielJackson?", Teal'c had asked stoically.
"No, of course not, Teal'c, it's just my time is so limited," Daniel had replied, desperately trying to avoid his friend's intense stare.
"Perhaps it is Oprah, you are displeased with?"
Daniel, for all his smarts, didn't know how to explain that participating in Oprah's Book Club was not exactly on his Top Ten List of Things to Do During My Downtime, especially when what he did want to do involved his Colonel, a couple of silk ties, and a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Noticing Teal'c was still waiting for a response, Daniel had squeaked onward.
"No, of course, not. But Jack, ah, Jack ..."
"So it is O'Neill that makes your time so limited? How does he do this? I wish to understand, in detail, DanielJackson."
Suddenly, Daniel tensed. He saw what he swore was a smirk on the Chulakian's face, a smirk that said he knew perfectly well why Daniel's time was so limited.
"I'll read the book, Teal'c," Daniel stated, admitting his defeat.
"By the end of the month, DanielJackson, and then we will consume dinner and discuss it, as Oprah has requested."
Daniel had no choice, but he was only a few chapters into the book, and the month was almost over. Something always seemed to interfere, and that something was a certain brown-eyed devil that filled his heart with joy and turned his knees into Jell-O.
Daniel had to finish the novel this weekend, or explain to Teal'c just exactly how Jack was making his time so limited, and just the thought of explaining that "in detail" made Daniel both shudder and blush at the same time.
When Jack returned, Daniel was engrossed in his novel, doing nothing more than giving his lover a faint smile and nod to acknowledge his return. Jack sighed and spent the next bit of time working on his pottery, something he had learned during the loop business a few years before.
A while later, still unable to distract the very-absorbed linguist from his reading, Jack decided it was time to clean his telescope and went up to the roof to do so. When he was done, Jack sat there a while, pondering his luck in life to have such a man as Daniel as his partner.
Life was good. Life was also ... trudgingly slow all of a sudden. Jack suddenly found he had nothing of interest to do.
"Ah, time to reclaim my lover; watch out Danny, here I come," Jack seductively groaned.
With his mind made up, Jack returned to the living room, and sat next to his partner, putting his right arm around Daniel's shoulder, and placing a long line of tender kisses along his nape up to his ear lobe, until finally the younger man moved slightly forward, turning his head towards Jack and issuing a warning glare that said "back off". Undaunted, Jack continued with his plan.
"Danny, I'm bored. Let's go fishing!"
"Jack, don't be a loon. In the first place, we only have two days off, of which three-fourths of a day is already gone, and that's not enough time to go to cabin, and in the second place, I'm in the middle of a book which I intend to finish reading tonight. Now, go away, and leave me alone."
"But Danny, I'm bored. I want to play."
"Play?"
"Yes, play. I have a few ideas. We could ..."
Daniel suddenly found himself being nibbled and kissed and caressed, which normally he wouldn't mind, but the image of telling Teal'c why he hadn't finished the book was too much to take, so Daniel mustered up all the strength he could to ignore the pleasure he was receiving through Jack's attentions.
"Jack, stop it! We played, to use your terminology, all last night, and again when you woke me up this morning, without even bringing me a cup of coffee first I might add, and then again just a few hours ago. I'm all played out, at least until tonight after dinner. Now ... Go ... A ... Way!"
"Danny ..."
"Jack, just go ... Go ... Jack, stop it! Go ... just ... go ... play with yourself."
Daniel was having a hard time getting his lover to take the hint, the older man continuing to "play" with the linguist via as much kissing, nibbling, touching, and groping as he possibly could as they talked.
"Daniel, it's no fun without you. C'mon. We can ... hmm ... watch a hockey game on TV."
"Hockey? You've totally lost your mind now, haven't you?"
"Danny, I'm bored and I just want to be with you, that's all. I'm sorry if that upsets you, or interrupts your important reading."
Jack was suddenly solemn. It had begun as sort of a game, but he did love Daniel so much, and the need to be with him practically burned a hole through his heart. He knew better, but a part of him wondered if maybe his partner wouldn't one day tire of him, especially if some old novel could keep them apart.
Sensing Jack's distress, Daniel put his good intentions on hold for a few minutes.
"Oh, c'mere, you ole softie ...," Daniel sighed, cupping Jack's face and bringing it towards him, the beginning of some tacit reassurance that Jack and Daniel were always and forever.
A few minutes later, after some heavy making out which threatened Daniel's resolve to finish the book, he pulled back, giving Jack one final long lip lock that left his silver-haired fox looking like the guppy he himself was so often accused of imitating.
"... That's all your going to get for now. I am going to finish this book, Jack. You can sit with me or go watch hockey, or do whatever you want, but no nibbling, rubbing, petting, nuzzling, or anything if you stay here."
"But Danny ..." **(Please)**
"No, Jack." **(You are so pushing it, Colonel of mine)**
Realizing a need for a sudden change of tactic, Jack remembered seeing Daniel spending time on the computer in the study before they had gone to bed the night before. He had another hunch.
Daniel had been putting in a lot of time working on his computer diary. Jack didn't know at first why, but Daniel had finally explained that he was hoping that some day their experiences could be an example to others, though he still wasn't able to explain exactly to whom, but Daniel wanted to teach that labels only hurt, and that prejudice was the real sickness in the world.
"I'm not really sure who will ever get to see it, Jack, but it's something I have to do, as if by writing about us, I'm achieving something. Sometimes it feels like we're being watched, like people are out there observing everything we do and can magically see and hear us.
"It's just something I feel I have to do, even though I know how odd it is for me to be saying that one day I want people to read my private thoughts. It's hard for me, Jack, to think about someone else reading about us, intimate thoughts and feelings.
"I'm ... I'm not even sure I can really do it, not ... not even sure how I feel about ... I mean, I love you, Jack."
Jack understood what Daniel was trying to say, but also knew the odds on any of their missions being declassified during their lifetime so that his partner's words could be shared was very slim. But Jack simply kissed his lover, and told him he was fine with it.
"Whatever you want to do, Danny, is fine by me. I'm not ashamed of our love, or how we got to where we are, so you write whatever you want, and if you want me to read it, I'll do it happily, but if not, that's okay too."
Jack smiled recalling the pleased look on his true love's face before coming back to the here and now. He was certain Daniel had added more to the diary and that was the way to go in order to get his way with his lover ASAP!
"Daniel, did you write anymore in your computer diary?"
"Um, actually yes, I did."
"Can I read it?"
"I don't know, Love. The last time you read one of the diary entries you freaked out over being a studmuffin."
"Ah, Daniel, I was just surprised you'd write about that, that's all. I really want to read what you wrote. Besides, if you let me read it, you can finish your book in peace and quiet. I'll be ... distracted from my ..."
"Nibbling?"
"Yes, nibbling. Then again, I could just keep .nibble ... doing ... kiss ... This, and we could ..."
Daniel was about to be lost to the sensations of Jack's touches and kisses when he snapped back to reality. Jack was nibbling now, at one of Daniel's most errogenous zones.
"Jack!" **(I can't concentrate when you do that)**
"Daniel?" **(I know, which is why I'm doing it.)**
"Okay, you win. Let's go into the study and I'll open the file for you, and stop nibbling!"
"You're no fun!"
Daniel made a motion for the two of them to get up off the couch, putting the book back down onto the coffee table, but Jack's next question made him pause for some unknown reason, a nervous anxiety springing forth inside of him, and so they continued to sit.
"So, what did you write about this time?"
"I ... I wrote about ..."
Daniel suddenly seemed unsure, almost nervous. Jack had enjoyed reading his lovers replay about their experience with Tonane. Having Daniel share his words, his private thoughts, with him made Jack feel a warmth he couldn't express, but if reading more of these memories was going to make his lover uncomfortable, Jack wanted no part of it.
"Danny, are you okay? I won't read it if you really don't want me to."
Daniel rose and walked towards the sliding glass door facing the backyard. Jack followed staying just a foot or so behind him, giving his lover a bit of space which Jack sensed he needed, at least for the moment.
After a minute of staring at the green grass, Daniel turned around, wanting Jack to see the sincerity of what he was about to say.
"No, Jack, I want you to read it. It's supposed to be read. I don't know when or by whom exactly, but there is a reason for all of this rambling down memory lane, and ... Jack, if I can't share it with you, who can I share it with?"
"I love you, Daniel!," Jack said softly, taking the younger man in his arms for a moment, then moving apart just slightly to look into his lover's precious blue eyes.
Jack could see Daniel's soul in those eyes. It was his personal gage to the health and well-being of this wonderful man with whom he shared his life. Jack placed his left hand on Daniel's cheek, gently rubbing his thumb across it. Daniel gave a small smile, and Jack couldn't resist a brief kiss before continuing on. He had to find out what was wrong.
"So if you want me to read it, why are you upset?"
"I'm fine, Babe, really I am. It's just, I don't know, this is so important. They need to understand about "us", that we're real and important and forever, but sometimes, it's hard to remember things that ... that ..."
"... that we'd rather forget? Or that live on in the nightmares?"
"Yeah, something like that."
"So, what did you write about?"
"When I died ... the first time. I wrote about Nem and ... I love you so much, Jack, but back then, on Oannes, it was still so far away. We were so ... so ..., oh, I don't know."
"How about in denial?"
"Maybe. I was so focused on Sha're, on getting her back, except ..."
"Danny?"
"Just read it, okay. I'm not sure I was making much sense, though."
Daniel walked back towards the couch, staring blankly at the long-forgotten novel sitting on the table. Jack wasn't going to let this go. Daniel was so much better at communicating his thoughts, his hurts, his pains these days, since that dream they had shared about his dying as the savior of Kelowna, but he still kept things inside sometimes. Old habits were hard to break.
"There's something else bothering you. What is it?"
"It's just ... I don't know. Jack, it's so important. I want us to be free. I want people to see how much we love and not think that we're freaks or strange or a couple of abnormal rejects from society."
"Daniel ..."
"I know. It's this hiding in plain sight business; it gets tiring. I want to go dancing with you, Jack, and I don't mean at some supper club where there's only men, though Babe, it was so special and I love you so much for taking me there and remembering, but I want to go dancing, in mixed company.
"I want to walk hand in hand at the park, here in the Springs, not just on vacation in San Francisco or when by some odd chance we are off world on some planet where our relationship is accepted.
"I want ... I want to love you, Jack, just love you, and for the world to see, and have that be okay without having to look around the edges for the NID trying to get something to blackmail you with, or without seeing mothers hiding their children because the "gays" can't keep their hands to themselves, or without being beaten up for doing nothing more than breathing and wanting to be with the man whose heart is my heart. I mean ... oh, I don't know what I mean ... I want ... it's just ..."
Jack couldn't take the distance any longer. He saw the tears welling in his Daniel's eyes, saw the sadness about to erupt, so he took action, closing the space that had been between them. Jack pulled his love into his embrace, and as he did so, Daniel's tears somehow knew it was time for them to make their release down the younger man's cheeks, now that he was safely in his beloved's arms.
Jack kissed Daniel's nape, and made soothing motions with his hands on the young man's back. Daniel cried sometimes, but he never liked to, and Jack's heart ached each and every time. Jack continued to kiss, and caress, and finally spoke softly into his lover's ear.
"Shhhh, Danny. I know, and while I can't fix the world, I can fix part of it, for you, and for "us". I can retire. I'll do it, Daniel, right now if you want me to."
"Would you?"
Daniel's voice had been so low, the question barely spoken, but Jack knew the answer. It came without question, without hesitation. Jack looked Daniel in the eyes, gently laid a kiss onto his nose, and smiled, and headed towards the kitchen where the phone sat.
"... Jack, where are you going?"
"To call Hammond, and tell him I need to see him, and then I'm going to type up my resignation."
"Jack, wait. Don't."
Daniel had followed his Colonel until Jack finally turned around, now holding the phone in his hand. They stood facing each other, looking intently at the other, making sure they could read each other's faces.
"Danny, everything you feel, I feel, and everything you want, I want. Don't you know that?"
"Yes, but ..."
"Daniel, I want to dance with you, too. The next wedding we go to, I want you in my arms when the bride and groom lead their guests to the dance floor. When we go shopping next month for Cassie's birthday, I want the gift to be from Jack and Daniel, one gift, from her ... uncles, her very together uncles, and she's old enough to know what that means.
"I want us to go to O'Malleys and sit at our favorite table and I want to hold your hand as we wait for our dinner, not under the table, Danny, but right there for everyone to see. I want the world to see how much I love you, and that for some reason I may never be able to fathom, that you are mine. 'Eat your hearts out, world, he's my archaeologist' - it's what I want to shout to anyone who looks and drools at you.
"I want it all as much as you do, so yes, I'm going to retire, so we can start that life of ours. No more hiding from the ignorant, not any more."
"Jack, it's not time for that, yet, and you know it. I'm sorry, I ... I just got so wrapped up in wanting and wishing, but Jack, if we stop now, and you know when you retire, I'm out too; we've already discussed that, and it's not negotiable, so when we do stop, it means we leave knowing the Goa'uld are still out there.
"Anubis is still out there. Sarah is still there, too, Jack. I ... I feel responsible for that, even though I know I shouldn't. And what about Sam and Teal'c? Are you ready to let go of what we've got with SG-1?"
Jack put the phone down and went back into the living room. He wanted to make sure of words. He needed Daniel to understand. Running his hands through his silver gray hair, Jack collected his thoughts as Daniel waited.
Then Jack turned and again closed the space the stood between them. Reaching out, he placed his hands on Daniels waist and then leaned into his forehead as he began to speak.
"Danny, we can't do this forever. We can't be responsible for every snake still on the loose. They'll always be someone out there, and all we can do is keep the world safe for as long as we can do it, but at some point, we have to let it go.
"I know, that's a strange thing coming from the military guy here, but I want more. Honestly, Daniel, we've both given up more than anyone could ever ask to save the butts of the same people you were talking about, the same ones who don't understand and probably don't even want to.
"Those people don't want to listen; they can't, because they get caught up in their own fears. They think we're different, and that scares the living daylights out of them. We can't change those people, Danny.
"I know what you are trying to do with your diary on the computer, and frankly, I'm glad, because there are others out there who are not prejudiced, only ignorant, and maybe we can get through to them."
Jack paused, putting his left hand under Daniel's chin and lifting it slightly upward to make sure Daniel would see his eyes as he continued to talk.
"Maybe if we let them see that a retired, highly decorated United States Air Force Colonel and a multiple PHD'd geek can be in love and happy and as married as any "traditional" couple, then just maybe we can open their eyes a little, and make it easier for the next guys, if not for ourselves. But regardless, we're entitled, to a life. When is enough enough?
"You said it yourself, Daniel. You wrote about the time you died ... 'the first time'. Danny, that was one time too many. As for Carter and Teal'c, we'll always be a family, you know that, but Carter's ready for the next challenge, and maybe a command will finally get her to where she needs to be. She's come close to losing her edge a few times, because we are all so close. It's cost her, I think, in terms of her capabilities, so I'm not so sure that leaving now wouldn't be a good thing for her career.
"Teal'c, he can write his own ticket. Stay on with the SGC, or go back to Chulak. He's a warrior, Daniel, with years ahead of him, and he'll never have to worry about growing gray hairs either! So when is enough, enough? When do we finally get to think about us. Answer me that."
Daniel pulled away, the truth of Jack's words circling through his mind. Jack was right, and yet, he couldn't help himself.
"Soon, but ... but not yet, Jack. We can't be that selfish."
"Sarah?"
"Yes, but not only that. We need to find the Lost City that was written about on the tablet we found on Abydos, and we're close, Jack. I feel it. I don't know why, but I do. Please, Jack. Let's stay a little longer."
Jack could never deny Daniel of something he wanted, not even this, at least not yet.
"If that's what you want, we'll stay, but not forever Daniel. That Lost City or whatever it turns out to be will probably open up a whole new can of worms, and then what?"
Daniel suddenly smiled, not a shy small one like Jack seen earlier, but that bright, happy, radiating one which always gave Jack's stomach happy butterflies. It was Daniel who closed the space between them this time.
He gave his lover a kiss, and said, "Then, we do what we can to make sure they are friendly worms, and then we ... we go fishing."
Jack laughed, returning his own kiss to the smiling man he now embraced, and then challenged, "Friendly worms? Fishing? We go fishing? Daniel, you're sick. You never volunteer to go fishing with me."
"I am now. I may be out of my mind, but it seems like heaven to me. You fish, and I read, and then we ... don't!"
"We don't? ... and what is it we ... 'don't?"
"Well ... There's this ... kiss ... and this ... nibble ... and ... bite ... this ... nuzzle ... and ... big kiss ..."
Jack was oh-so-willing to go with the program, but thought he should at least make one attempt to get Daniel back on track, since both were supposed to be reading. He was positive Daniel would whine about it later, so this was a pre-emptive volley in that "discussion" to come.
His defense formed in his mind: "I tried to get you to finish reading your book, Daniel, remember?" Yes, Jack had it already planned. He'd be safe. Trying to speak while Daniel was doing what he was currently doing wasn't easy, but Jack pressed onward.
"Daniel? I thought you wanted to finish your book?"
"What book?," Daniel asked absently, too involved in current task of unbuttoning his lover's shirt to have more than short-term memory access.
"That one, there on the table, and I wanted to read your computer diary."
Jack was enjoying this. Daniel was pulling his shirt off now and getting ready to for the next stage of what was to come.
"I'll finish the book later, and you were there, Jack, so you know what happened, but if you want, I'll let you read it tonight. Right now, I'd rather ... play ... with you."
"Ah, play ..." Jack let out a soft moan as Daniel kissed a particularly sensual spot on his chest.
"... and nibble," Daniel said, nibbling away at his lover.
"Nibbling is good." Jack was beginning to lose brain power, and found himself wondering why they were still downstairs.
"... and ..."
That was it. Jack could take no more.
"Daniel, bedroom ... Now!"
"Lead on, Colonel!" Daniel spoke knowingly, and Jack did.
As they hurried up the stairs, Daniel had a momentary flare that he had forgotten something important, something about Jaffas and details, and potential embarrassment, but a few kisses later, being entwined as one with the man he loved, Daniel figured whatever it was couldn't have been very important. He'd have to ask Teal'c about it tomorrow.
~~Finis - Finished - Done - The End - But is it ever Really?~~
Author: Orrymain
Author Email: marciastudley@comcast.net (Feedback welcome)
Category: Slash, Angst, Romance, Established Relationship
Pairing: Jack/Daniel .... and it's all J/D
Rating: PG-13
Season: 7
Spoilers: Fire and Water, Window of Opportunity, and Meridian (but nothing much really there to spoil for either show and nothing about glowy thingys!!)
Size: 28kb; short story
Written: July 20, 2003
Archive: Area52, Comfort Zone, FanFiction.Net, Cartouche, AlphaGate, TheBoy
Disclaimer: Usual disclaimers -- not mine, wish they were, especially Daniel, and Jack, too, but they aren't. This was a whim; all in fun. I don't have anything to do with them legally at all!
Summary: Jack is bored and wants to play; Daniel wants to finish reading a book; Together, they end up wondering if now is the time to stop hiding in plain sight. This is the 3rd in the "They Don't Understand" series. Each story can be read independently and can stand alone, however.
Notes:
1) Jack and Daniel are noted for having what I call double conversations. A simple "Jack" could mean several things, saying much more than just the name itself. A normal question like "what are you doing" could carry multiple connotations, including feelings, desires, fears, etc. At various points during this series, these double conversations are noted like this: "Actual Spoken Words" **(double dialogue meaning)**
2) Used with the author's permission, reference to Jack having taken Daniel dancing is from Devra's magnificent work, "The Last Dance" which is located at http://www.thealphagate.com/stories/LastDance.asp.
A Time for Us
By Orrymain
Their last mission was nothing especially worth noting, pretty much a standard meet and greet. No Goa'uld, alien technology, or beautiful but lonely natives to lust after Daniel, which pleased Jack greatly.
Now, they had some downtime, to relax and take care of things at the house. The happy couple had made slow and tender love last night, and began the new day with some serious making out before being interrupted by Mrs. Greenley, an elderly neighbor, needing some help with her plumbing. She had no one else, and was on a fixed income, so Jack had been her unofficial handyman for years.
With a certain regret, Jack left his lover to check out Mrs. Greenley's pipes.
When he returned, Daniel was occupied doing their laundry, so Jack busied himself with the weekly mowing of the lawn. He pulled a few weeds, repaired a fence post, and replaced one of the sprinkler heads which had met its demise the last time Jack had mowed the lawn.
Smiling as he adjusted the new sprayer, the Air Force Colonel recalled how his preoccupation with getting Daniel back into bed had been the reason for the destruction of the previous sprinkler head.
Satisfied with the yard work, hoping that his mind could stay focused enough on the remainder of his downtime chores to not destroy anything else, Jack expressed a silent chuckle, realizing that forcing himself not to think of Daniel, was more distracting than actually thinking about his lover.
When he went inside to grab a beer, Jack decided to check on Daniel, but couldn't find him. The laundry had been done, the sheets replaced on their bed, and Jack chuckled to notice Daniel had even dusted the bedroom furniture.
"That's My Daniel, Mr. Domestication," Jack mused to himself.
On a hunch, Jack checked the front yard and discovered his domesticated partner leaning over his car. The hood was open, Daniel's shirt was off, and his derriere was wiggling an invitation that Jack was eager to accept.
Jack approached his lover, who was swearing in one of the many languages he now spoke ("It was 23 when we met, must be at least 40 by now," Jack thought to himself).
Peeking around the street to make sure none of the neighbors were outside, Jack maneuvered his way behind Daniel, putting his arms around his lover's waist, and drawing him near. Daniel nearly jumped.
"Jack, don't do that!"
Jack retaliated by planting a long and devouring kiss on the younger man, and proceeded to coax him into the house. Daniel made a half-hearted attempt to continue his automobile maintenance, incoherently muttering something about needing to replace some lubricant, but the only lubricant Jack cared about was upstairs.
"It'll keep, Danny, " Jack urged as they moved on to the bedroom.
Some time later, after their mid-morning tryst into the heavens, Jack had run a few errands, while Daniel finished the work on his car and done some research on the internet. Sam had dropped by for a few minutes to show off her latest revamped motorcycle, and then Daniel played fireman, getting six-year old Cindy Herndon's cat out of tree.
Jack just shook his head, and uttered his usual, "Daniel, you never cease to amaze me with your talents." After that, Jack had a call from the General that took him out of Daniel's earshot for quite a while.
The young archaeologist determined he'd done enough work, and settled on to the couch, deciding this was the day he was going to finish reading John Steinbeck's "East of Eden". It was Oprah's Book of the Month, and Teal'c was insisting that Daniel read it so they could discuss it.
Teal'c never missed Oprah, videotaping the show even when SG-1 were off world. Ever since Jack had joked about being on the talk show as they left the Land of Light, the Jaffa had become fascinated by Oprah, and now, the talk show host had brought back her book club, and Teal'c was obsessed.
Daniel had never been one to read a lot of fiction, but turning down an intimidating Jaffa was not easy to do.
"You have something against reading this "East of Eden", DanielJackson?", Teal'c had asked stoically.
"No, of course not, Teal'c, it's just my time is so limited," Daniel had replied, desperately trying to avoid his friend's intense stare.
"Perhaps it is Oprah, you are displeased with?"
Daniel, for all his smarts, didn't know how to explain that participating in Oprah's Book Club was not exactly on his Top Ten List of Things to Do During My Downtime, especially when what he did want to do involved his Colonel, a couple of silk ties, and a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Noticing Teal'c was still waiting for a response, Daniel had squeaked onward.
"No, of course, not. But Jack, ah, Jack ..."
"So it is O'Neill that makes your time so limited? How does he do this? I wish to understand, in detail, DanielJackson."
Suddenly, Daniel tensed. He saw what he swore was a smirk on the Chulakian's face, a smirk that said he knew perfectly well why Daniel's time was so limited.
"I'll read the book, Teal'c," Daniel stated, admitting his defeat.
"By the end of the month, DanielJackson, and then we will consume dinner and discuss it, as Oprah has requested."
Daniel had no choice, but he was only a few chapters into the book, and the month was almost over. Something always seemed to interfere, and that something was a certain brown-eyed devil that filled his heart with joy and turned his knees into Jell-O.
Daniel had to finish the novel this weekend, or explain to Teal'c just exactly how Jack was making his time so limited, and just the thought of explaining that "in detail" made Daniel both shudder and blush at the same time.
When Jack returned, Daniel was engrossed in his novel, doing nothing more than giving his lover a faint smile and nod to acknowledge his return. Jack sighed and spent the next bit of time working on his pottery, something he had learned during the loop business a few years before.
A while later, still unable to distract the very-absorbed linguist from his reading, Jack decided it was time to clean his telescope and went up to the roof to do so. When he was done, Jack sat there a while, pondering his luck in life to have such a man as Daniel as his partner.
Life was good. Life was also ... trudgingly slow all of a sudden. Jack suddenly found he had nothing of interest to do.
"Ah, time to reclaim my lover; watch out Danny, here I come," Jack seductively groaned.
With his mind made up, Jack returned to the living room, and sat next to his partner, putting his right arm around Daniel's shoulder, and placing a long line of tender kisses along his nape up to his ear lobe, until finally the younger man moved slightly forward, turning his head towards Jack and issuing a warning glare that said "back off". Undaunted, Jack continued with his plan.
"Danny, I'm bored. Let's go fishing!"
"Jack, don't be a loon. In the first place, we only have two days off, of which three-fourths of a day is already gone, and that's not enough time to go to cabin, and in the second place, I'm in the middle of a book which I intend to finish reading tonight. Now, go away, and leave me alone."
"But Danny, I'm bored. I want to play."
"Play?"
"Yes, play. I have a few ideas. We could ..."
Daniel suddenly found himself being nibbled and kissed and caressed, which normally he wouldn't mind, but the image of telling Teal'c why he hadn't finished the book was too much to take, so Daniel mustered up all the strength he could to ignore the pleasure he was receiving through Jack's attentions.
"Jack, stop it! We played, to use your terminology, all last night, and again when you woke me up this morning, without even bringing me a cup of coffee first I might add, and then again just a few hours ago. I'm all played out, at least until tonight after dinner. Now ... Go ... A ... Way!"
"Danny ..."
"Jack, just go ... Go ... Jack, stop it! Go ... just ... go ... play with yourself."
Daniel was having a hard time getting his lover to take the hint, the older man continuing to "play" with the linguist via as much kissing, nibbling, touching, and groping as he possibly could as they talked.
"Daniel, it's no fun without you. C'mon. We can ... hmm ... watch a hockey game on TV."
"Hockey? You've totally lost your mind now, haven't you?"
"Danny, I'm bored and I just want to be with you, that's all. I'm sorry if that upsets you, or interrupts your important reading."
Jack was suddenly solemn. It had begun as sort of a game, but he did love Daniel so much, and the need to be with him practically burned a hole through his heart. He knew better, but a part of him wondered if maybe his partner wouldn't one day tire of him, especially if some old novel could keep them apart.
Sensing Jack's distress, Daniel put his good intentions on hold for a few minutes.
"Oh, c'mere, you ole softie ...," Daniel sighed, cupping Jack's face and bringing it towards him, the beginning of some tacit reassurance that Jack and Daniel were always and forever.
A few minutes later, after some heavy making out which threatened Daniel's resolve to finish the book, he pulled back, giving Jack one final long lip lock that left his silver-haired fox looking like the guppy he himself was so often accused of imitating.
"... That's all your going to get for now. I am going to finish this book, Jack. You can sit with me or go watch hockey, or do whatever you want, but no nibbling, rubbing, petting, nuzzling, or anything if you stay here."
"But Danny ..." **(Please)**
"No, Jack." **(You are so pushing it, Colonel of mine)**
Realizing a need for a sudden change of tactic, Jack remembered seeing Daniel spending time on the computer in the study before they had gone to bed the night before. He had another hunch.
Daniel had been putting in a lot of time working on his computer diary. Jack didn't know at first why, but Daniel had finally explained that he was hoping that some day their experiences could be an example to others, though he still wasn't able to explain exactly to whom, but Daniel wanted to teach that labels only hurt, and that prejudice was the real sickness in the world.
"I'm not really sure who will ever get to see it, Jack, but it's something I have to do, as if by writing about us, I'm achieving something. Sometimes it feels like we're being watched, like people are out there observing everything we do and can magically see and hear us.
"It's just something I feel I have to do, even though I know how odd it is for me to be saying that one day I want people to read my private thoughts. It's hard for me, Jack, to think about someone else reading about us, intimate thoughts and feelings.
"I'm ... I'm not even sure I can really do it, not ... not even sure how I feel about ... I mean, I love you, Jack."
Jack understood what Daniel was trying to say, but also knew the odds on any of their missions being declassified during their lifetime so that his partner's words could be shared was very slim. But Jack simply kissed his lover, and told him he was fine with it.
"Whatever you want to do, Danny, is fine by me. I'm not ashamed of our love, or how we got to where we are, so you write whatever you want, and if you want me to read it, I'll do it happily, but if not, that's okay too."
Jack smiled recalling the pleased look on his true love's face before coming back to the here and now. He was certain Daniel had added more to the diary and that was the way to go in order to get his way with his lover ASAP!
"Daniel, did you write anymore in your computer diary?"
"Um, actually yes, I did."
"Can I read it?"
"I don't know, Love. The last time you read one of the diary entries you freaked out over being a studmuffin."
"Ah, Daniel, I was just surprised you'd write about that, that's all. I really want to read what you wrote. Besides, if you let me read it, you can finish your book in peace and quiet. I'll be ... distracted from my ..."
"Nibbling?"
"Yes, nibbling. Then again, I could just keep .nibble ... doing ... kiss ... This, and we could ..."
Daniel was about to be lost to the sensations of Jack's touches and kisses when he snapped back to reality. Jack was nibbling now, at one of Daniel's most errogenous zones.
"Jack!" **(I can't concentrate when you do that)**
"Daniel?" **(I know, which is why I'm doing it.)**
"Okay, you win. Let's go into the study and I'll open the file for you, and stop nibbling!"
"You're no fun!"
Daniel made a motion for the two of them to get up off the couch, putting the book back down onto the coffee table, but Jack's next question made him pause for some unknown reason, a nervous anxiety springing forth inside of him, and so they continued to sit.
"So, what did you write about this time?"
"I ... I wrote about ..."
Daniel suddenly seemed unsure, almost nervous. Jack had enjoyed reading his lovers replay about their experience with Tonane. Having Daniel share his words, his private thoughts, with him made Jack feel a warmth he couldn't express, but if reading more of these memories was going to make his lover uncomfortable, Jack wanted no part of it.
"Danny, are you okay? I won't read it if you really don't want me to."
Daniel rose and walked towards the sliding glass door facing the backyard. Jack followed staying just a foot or so behind him, giving his lover a bit of space which Jack sensed he needed, at least for the moment.
After a minute of staring at the green grass, Daniel turned around, wanting Jack to see the sincerity of what he was about to say.
"No, Jack, I want you to read it. It's supposed to be read. I don't know when or by whom exactly, but there is a reason for all of this rambling down memory lane, and ... Jack, if I can't share it with you, who can I share it with?"
"I love you, Daniel!," Jack said softly, taking the younger man in his arms for a moment, then moving apart just slightly to look into his lover's precious blue eyes.
Jack could see Daniel's soul in those eyes. It was his personal gage to the health and well-being of this wonderful man with whom he shared his life. Jack placed his left hand on Daniel's cheek, gently rubbing his thumb across it. Daniel gave a small smile, and Jack couldn't resist a brief kiss before continuing on. He had to find out what was wrong.
"So if you want me to read it, why are you upset?"
"I'm fine, Babe, really I am. It's just, I don't know, this is so important. They need to understand about "us", that we're real and important and forever, but sometimes, it's hard to remember things that ... that ..."
"... that we'd rather forget? Or that live on in the nightmares?"
"Yeah, something like that."
"So, what did you write about?"
"When I died ... the first time. I wrote about Nem and ... I love you so much, Jack, but back then, on Oannes, it was still so far away. We were so ... so ..., oh, I don't know."
"How about in denial?"
"Maybe. I was so focused on Sha're, on getting her back, except ..."
"Danny?"
"Just read it, okay. I'm not sure I was making much sense, though."
Daniel walked back towards the couch, staring blankly at the long-forgotten novel sitting on the table. Jack wasn't going to let this go. Daniel was so much better at communicating his thoughts, his hurts, his pains these days, since that dream they had shared about his dying as the savior of Kelowna, but he still kept things inside sometimes. Old habits were hard to break.
"There's something else bothering you. What is it?"
"It's just ... I don't know. Jack, it's so important. I want us to be free. I want people to see how much we love and not think that we're freaks or strange or a couple of abnormal rejects from society."
"Daniel ..."
"I know. It's this hiding in plain sight business; it gets tiring. I want to go dancing with you, Jack, and I don't mean at some supper club where there's only men, though Babe, it was so special and I love you so much for taking me there and remembering, but I want to go dancing, in mixed company.
"I want to walk hand in hand at the park, here in the Springs, not just on vacation in San Francisco or when by some odd chance we are off world on some planet where our relationship is accepted.
"I want ... I want to love you, Jack, just love you, and for the world to see, and have that be okay without having to look around the edges for the NID trying to get something to blackmail you with, or without seeing mothers hiding their children because the "gays" can't keep their hands to themselves, or without being beaten up for doing nothing more than breathing and wanting to be with the man whose heart is my heart. I mean ... oh, I don't know what I mean ... I want ... it's just ..."
Jack couldn't take the distance any longer. He saw the tears welling in his Daniel's eyes, saw the sadness about to erupt, so he took action, closing the space that had been between them. Jack pulled his love into his embrace, and as he did so, Daniel's tears somehow knew it was time for them to make their release down the younger man's cheeks, now that he was safely in his beloved's arms.
Jack kissed Daniel's nape, and made soothing motions with his hands on the young man's back. Daniel cried sometimes, but he never liked to, and Jack's heart ached each and every time. Jack continued to kiss, and caress, and finally spoke softly into his lover's ear.
"Shhhh, Danny. I know, and while I can't fix the world, I can fix part of it, for you, and for "us". I can retire. I'll do it, Daniel, right now if you want me to."
"Would you?"
Daniel's voice had been so low, the question barely spoken, but Jack knew the answer. It came without question, without hesitation. Jack looked Daniel in the eyes, gently laid a kiss onto his nose, and smiled, and headed towards the kitchen where the phone sat.
"... Jack, where are you going?"
"To call Hammond, and tell him I need to see him, and then I'm going to type up my resignation."
"Jack, wait. Don't."
Daniel had followed his Colonel until Jack finally turned around, now holding the phone in his hand. They stood facing each other, looking intently at the other, making sure they could read each other's faces.
"Danny, everything you feel, I feel, and everything you want, I want. Don't you know that?"
"Yes, but ..."
"Daniel, I want to dance with you, too. The next wedding we go to, I want you in my arms when the bride and groom lead their guests to the dance floor. When we go shopping next month for Cassie's birthday, I want the gift to be from Jack and Daniel, one gift, from her ... uncles, her very together uncles, and she's old enough to know what that means.
"I want us to go to O'Malleys and sit at our favorite table and I want to hold your hand as we wait for our dinner, not under the table, Danny, but right there for everyone to see. I want the world to see how much I love you, and that for some reason I may never be able to fathom, that you are mine. 'Eat your hearts out, world, he's my archaeologist' - it's what I want to shout to anyone who looks and drools at you.
"I want it all as much as you do, so yes, I'm going to retire, so we can start that life of ours. No more hiding from the ignorant, not any more."
"Jack, it's not time for that, yet, and you know it. I'm sorry, I ... I just got so wrapped up in wanting and wishing, but Jack, if we stop now, and you know when you retire, I'm out too; we've already discussed that, and it's not negotiable, so when we do stop, it means we leave knowing the Goa'uld are still out there.
"Anubis is still out there. Sarah is still there, too, Jack. I ... I feel responsible for that, even though I know I shouldn't. And what about Sam and Teal'c? Are you ready to let go of what we've got with SG-1?"
Jack put the phone down and went back into the living room. He wanted to make sure of words. He needed Daniel to understand. Running his hands through his silver gray hair, Jack collected his thoughts as Daniel waited.
Then Jack turned and again closed the space the stood between them. Reaching out, he placed his hands on Daniels waist and then leaned into his forehead as he began to speak.
"Danny, we can't do this forever. We can't be responsible for every snake still on the loose. They'll always be someone out there, and all we can do is keep the world safe for as long as we can do it, but at some point, we have to let it go.
"I know, that's a strange thing coming from the military guy here, but I want more. Honestly, Daniel, we've both given up more than anyone could ever ask to save the butts of the same people you were talking about, the same ones who don't understand and probably don't even want to.
"Those people don't want to listen; they can't, because they get caught up in their own fears. They think we're different, and that scares the living daylights out of them. We can't change those people, Danny.
"I know what you are trying to do with your diary on the computer, and frankly, I'm glad, because there are others out there who are not prejudiced, only ignorant, and maybe we can get through to them."
Jack paused, putting his left hand under Daniel's chin and lifting it slightly upward to make sure Daniel would see his eyes as he continued to talk.
"Maybe if we let them see that a retired, highly decorated United States Air Force Colonel and a multiple PHD'd geek can be in love and happy and as married as any "traditional" couple, then just maybe we can open their eyes a little, and make it easier for the next guys, if not for ourselves. But regardless, we're entitled, to a life. When is enough enough?
"You said it yourself, Daniel. You wrote about the time you died ... 'the first time'. Danny, that was one time too many. As for Carter and Teal'c, we'll always be a family, you know that, but Carter's ready for the next challenge, and maybe a command will finally get her to where she needs to be. She's come close to losing her edge a few times, because we are all so close. It's cost her, I think, in terms of her capabilities, so I'm not so sure that leaving now wouldn't be a good thing for her career.
"Teal'c, he can write his own ticket. Stay on with the SGC, or go back to Chulak. He's a warrior, Daniel, with years ahead of him, and he'll never have to worry about growing gray hairs either! So when is enough, enough? When do we finally get to think about us. Answer me that."
Daniel pulled away, the truth of Jack's words circling through his mind. Jack was right, and yet, he couldn't help himself.
"Soon, but ... but not yet, Jack. We can't be that selfish."
"Sarah?"
"Yes, but not only that. We need to find the Lost City that was written about on the tablet we found on Abydos, and we're close, Jack. I feel it. I don't know why, but I do. Please, Jack. Let's stay a little longer."
Jack could never deny Daniel of something he wanted, not even this, at least not yet.
"If that's what you want, we'll stay, but not forever Daniel. That Lost City or whatever it turns out to be will probably open up a whole new can of worms, and then what?"
Daniel suddenly smiled, not a shy small one like Jack seen earlier, but that bright, happy, radiating one which always gave Jack's stomach happy butterflies. It was Daniel who closed the space between them this time.
He gave his lover a kiss, and said, "Then, we do what we can to make sure they are friendly worms, and then we ... we go fishing."
Jack laughed, returning his own kiss to the smiling man he now embraced, and then challenged, "Friendly worms? Fishing? We go fishing? Daniel, you're sick. You never volunteer to go fishing with me."
"I am now. I may be out of my mind, but it seems like heaven to me. You fish, and I read, and then we ... don't!"
"We don't? ... and what is it we ... 'don't?"
"Well ... There's this ... kiss ... and this ... nibble ... and ... bite ... this ... nuzzle ... and ... big kiss ..."
Jack was oh-so-willing to go with the program, but thought he should at least make one attempt to get Daniel back on track, since both were supposed to be reading. He was positive Daniel would whine about it later, so this was a pre-emptive volley in that "discussion" to come.
His defense formed in his mind: "I tried to get you to finish reading your book, Daniel, remember?" Yes, Jack had it already planned. He'd be safe. Trying to speak while Daniel was doing what he was currently doing wasn't easy, but Jack pressed onward.
"Daniel? I thought you wanted to finish your book?"
"What book?," Daniel asked absently, too involved in current task of unbuttoning his lover's shirt to have more than short-term memory access.
"That one, there on the table, and I wanted to read your computer diary."
Jack was enjoying this. Daniel was pulling his shirt off now and getting ready to for the next stage of what was to come.
"I'll finish the book later, and you were there, Jack, so you know what happened, but if you want, I'll let you read it tonight. Right now, I'd rather ... play ... with you."
"Ah, play ..." Jack let out a soft moan as Daniel kissed a particularly sensual spot on his chest.
"... and nibble," Daniel said, nibbling away at his lover.
"Nibbling is good." Jack was beginning to lose brain power, and found himself wondering why they were still downstairs.
"... and ..."
That was it. Jack could take no more.
"Daniel, bedroom ... Now!"
"Lead on, Colonel!" Daniel spoke knowingly, and Jack did.
As they hurried up the stairs, Daniel had a momentary flare that he had forgotten something important, something about Jaffas and details, and potential embarrassment, but a few kisses later, being entwined as one with the man he loved, Daniel figured whatever it was couldn't have been very important. He'd have to ask Teal'c about it tomorrow.
~~Finis - Finished - Done - The End - But is it ever Really?~~
