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read is all I have to say. Thanks to all the reviewers, you people rock.
This is an insight into life in Slytherin. A sad chapter, don't read if you
are already feeling really sad. I don't expect too many reviews for this
chapter. Actually I don't expect any reviews whatsoever ( BUT, do review if
you want the next chapter up any time soon.
Chapter 18: Sad Chapter
SNAPE'S POV
Where was I? I asked myself, my eyes hurting quite a bit. I couldn't' remember anything, nothing at all. Suddenly a pain shot through my head and I felt as if I was being drawn back to the past, one I would rather forget.
FLASHBACK
"SEVERUS! COME DOWN THIS INSTANT!" Severus's father, Sinither, hollered and an eight year old Snape came bounding down the stairs. He had straight black and bright brown eyes and in all he looked quite adorable, with a little bear in his hands..
"Yes Papa?" He asked, but recoiled when he saw his father's face. He had never seen it like that before, his face was pale and his eyes were almost red, and he had this maniacal glint in them.
"Papa?" He asked timidly, backing up the stairs but his father grabbed him by his collar of his shirt, and drew him up. Severus was now shaking, and his eyes welled up with tears.
"You are the reason why your mother is dead Severus, you are nothing but a bane to my life. I hate you." The father spat, as Severus's mother had died on giving birth to him, but Severus had never received any blame for it, until now.
Severus looked at his father with trembling lips and he choked back a sob, and then managed to whisper, "I didn't mean to."
"MEAN TO? WHO CARES IF YOU MEANT TO YOU FILTHY PIECE OF SHIT! YOU DESERVE TO DIE! OUT OF MY HOUSE! NOW!" His father roared, and then gave Severus a whack across the face with his hand, and Severus felt the ring which he had given his father for father's day scratch his pale face. He felt the blood trickle down, but before he could react his father had dropped him on the ground and kicked him.
"TAKE YOUR RING! I DON'T' WANT ANY PART OF YOU IN MY HOUSE! LEAVE NOW!" Snape's father yelled, and he threw the ring at Severus. The ring which Severus had spent 1 month saving for. Severus didn't' dare look at his father, and his father kicked him, in the direction of the door.
"I SAID GO! LEAVE NOW! NEVER RETURN!" Severus's father spat at Severus and then picked Severus up and threw him against a wall, and Severus could feel his bones shatter.
"I DIDN'T MEAN TO!" He screamed now, and the bear which he was clutching fell to the floor, and his father picked it up, before tearing it up, that was the bear which his mother had left for him, Severus felt tears trickle down through the pain, and he saw the bear being torn.
"OUT!" His father screeched, before taking Severus and throwing him out into the snow, and then the mauled bear after him.
With a crunch sound, Severus fell onto the snow, and he sat there, gathering his knees to his face and cried, he sobbed there in the cold, his whole body shaking, every movement was pain, but he couldn't' stop himself.
He could hear his father coming, and he ran. He picked up the bear and ran, although it hurt like hell to even move. He didn't' know how far he had run but he finally collapsed with fear and exhaustion, and he could feel his muscles cramp. He saw how battered and bruised his arms were, and he looked at the bear in his hands.
"I'm really sorry mummy." He softly cried, but then his father's words and he wondered if his mother was yelling at him right there and then, and more tears flowed down his small face.
"I love you." He whispered quietly to himself, now curling up into a ball, and rocking slowly, still holding the bear in his bruised hands.
"Why didn't you take me with you?" He sobbed, not looking up, "I want to follow you, I don't want to stay here." He looked up at the stars in the sky, "TAKE ME! WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME TOO!"
His ribs hurt and he was shivering, he felt his bear, and found the stitch which had his name on it, "Severus"
"Why did you give birth to me when you knew you would die?" Little Severus sobbed quietly, "Take me now please mummy, I don't' want to live anymore. I have no where to go, I have nothing to eat. I'm tired and cold. Papa hates me, and I have no where to run to, no one to hug, nobody loves me and I just want to lie here and die, it seems so much cooler here."
It was Christmas Eve, Severus thought, I thought Papa had brought home a present for me. He spread himself out, and he felt the coldness overcome him, and he slowly lost consciousness, but he fainted away with a smile, thinking about what his mother could have been like.
REALITY
Snape opened his eyes slowly, and found himself in the Infirmary, trying to remember what had happened hurt, and he just lay there thinking about nothing, slowly watching little snippets of bitterness in his life pass him by. Like when, James Potter and Sirius Black had fooled him to going to the Whomping Willow and he had nearly died. Dumbledore had informed his father, and Severus had received a long vindictive letter asking why he hadn't just remained there and died, maybe that would have done the world a favour.
Snape had built up a shield around himself, he wasn't going to get hurt anymore. However, he was still human, and the insults spoken so loudly and freely did cut very deep, and he had no real friends. He was all alone by himself, and he found that he just walked around every day, looking for some purpose in life. He really could not care anymore that people were dying outside Hogwarts life, he hoped that he could just die one day, perhaps then he would go somewhere he could be loved.
Slowly a lone tear trickled down his face, and he heard Evans' and Potter's voice ringing out in the silence. He sighed when he realized that nobody could ever care about him in that way, nobody would miss him if he did ever die. He heard Evan yelling about how James was unconscious, and he could feel the concern in her voice. He wondered if he could ever feel for someone like how Evans evidently felt for Potter. That was weird, he thought, Evans hates Potter. Wait no, Potter wrote the letters. Severus never had a social life, except maybe occasionally walking in Lucius's shadow, but that never was fun. So, Severus spent most of his time observing, and he finally found out that Potter was writing love notes to Evans but Evans didn't' know. It all started as a prank he supposed, but slowly Potter began to feel for her.
Snape's POV
Sigh, Gryffindors were so foolish and sensitive, crying over the smallest things. Then what happened? Oh yes, they had an argument? Wait no there was something before that. He had gone into Malfoy's bedroom, and Malfoy was brewing a potion. Malfoy always had his eye on the pureblooded Kimberly from Gryffindor, if that was what she was called. Snape had overheard that Kim liked Remus, or was it that Remus liked Kim? Oh well, he never had any head for gossip.
Malfoy suddenly stunned me, yes that was it. Then what happened? ARGH! I can't remember a single thing, he must have used some sort of neuro binder, damn him.
THIRD PERSON POV
Snape closed his eyes, hoping that maybe he would be able to get some rest, he felt very tired all of a sudden, he suddenly wished he hadn't.
FLASHBACK
"Severus, it was all a joke, get it?" Laughed Rachel Avery, one of the prettiest girls in Slytherin.
"I can't believe you fell for it!" Giggled her best friend, Irene Nott, and they both walked away laughing.
"You thought she actually liked you?" Snickered Lucius, as the second year Severus stood there, stunned. He had a gift in his hands, and in it was "You fell for it" It was Christmas, and he had a steady girlfriend, the fourth year Rachel Avery, but apparently it was a dare. Who could stay with the ugly Severus anyway?
He had given Rachel a beautiful crystal globe as she loved Divination, he had saved since Easter for it, which was when Rachel had asked him out, much to his surprise. The globe was now shattered on the floor, Rachel had dropped it with a sickly sweet, "oops!" She then gave him her present, he opened it hesitantly, something told him something was wrong. It was all a trick, a prank.
Severus had been embarrassed in front of the whole Slytherin house, it was Christmas morning and all Slytherin was there comparing and exchanging presents of dark arts and other stuff.
"How pathetic can you get Snape?" Chortled a seventh year, and the whole house burst into laughter, and Severus fled away into his bedroom, where he found that people had torn his robes and poured paint in his trunk, no doubt a "Gryffindor" prank as the paint was red and gold.
"Die oil head." Was plastered all over his trunk and he just sat on the floor, not able to cry. He just sat there not moving and not saying a single word, for a long long time. He didn't' know how come they hated him so much, maybe it was because Severus hung around Lucius so much, and Malfoy was hated by the "Marauders" But it wasn't fair, he hadn't done anything, and slowly rage overtook him, he was going to block out everyone. Nobody crossed him, he was going to get back at everyone, make them wish that they were never born.
REALITY
Snape woke up suddenly, and he saw Lily standing there, looking at him as though he was the plague.
"Evans." He said coolly and Lily looked at him with something which looked like fear, and Snape looked surprised.
"Get away from me you pervert." Lily hissed, and Snape flinched.
LILY'S POV
Did Snape just flinch? That's not like him, don't tell me Peter gave him some personality reversal potion. Wait a second, Snape's eyes, why are they grey? I thought that his eyes were brown? That sickly shit brown.
"Why are your eyes grey?" I asked hesitantly, and Snape immediately put his hand to his face, stupid git, what did he think he could do?
"Look in the mirror," I suggested, something nagging at the back of my brain. Green eyes, green eyes, OH MY GOD. I KNEW WHAT HAD HAPPENED. Severus was being controlled, by someone with grey eyes, Remus? No, wait Lucius had grey eyes, yes grey cold eyes. Maybe him? But why would he control his best friend? Maybe Severus and him aren't as close as I thought they were, wait did I just call him Severus?
"WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME?" Screamed Snape, a tortured scream and I saw him collapse onto the ground, and I saw him get closer towards me, but I could see Snape struggling, not a pretty sight.
"Lily," He choked out, and I could hear the fear and pain in his voice, "Run."
Chapter 18: Sad Chapter
SNAPE'S POV
Where was I? I asked myself, my eyes hurting quite a bit. I couldn't' remember anything, nothing at all. Suddenly a pain shot through my head and I felt as if I was being drawn back to the past, one I would rather forget.
FLASHBACK
"SEVERUS! COME DOWN THIS INSTANT!" Severus's father, Sinither, hollered and an eight year old Snape came bounding down the stairs. He had straight black and bright brown eyes and in all he looked quite adorable, with a little bear in his hands..
"Yes Papa?" He asked, but recoiled when he saw his father's face. He had never seen it like that before, his face was pale and his eyes were almost red, and he had this maniacal glint in them.
"Papa?" He asked timidly, backing up the stairs but his father grabbed him by his collar of his shirt, and drew him up. Severus was now shaking, and his eyes welled up with tears.
"You are the reason why your mother is dead Severus, you are nothing but a bane to my life. I hate you." The father spat, as Severus's mother had died on giving birth to him, but Severus had never received any blame for it, until now.
Severus looked at his father with trembling lips and he choked back a sob, and then managed to whisper, "I didn't mean to."
"MEAN TO? WHO CARES IF YOU MEANT TO YOU FILTHY PIECE OF SHIT! YOU DESERVE TO DIE! OUT OF MY HOUSE! NOW!" His father roared, and then gave Severus a whack across the face with his hand, and Severus felt the ring which he had given his father for father's day scratch his pale face. He felt the blood trickle down, but before he could react his father had dropped him on the ground and kicked him.
"TAKE YOUR RING! I DON'T' WANT ANY PART OF YOU IN MY HOUSE! LEAVE NOW!" Snape's father yelled, and he threw the ring at Severus. The ring which Severus had spent 1 month saving for. Severus didn't' dare look at his father, and his father kicked him, in the direction of the door.
"I SAID GO! LEAVE NOW! NEVER RETURN!" Severus's father spat at Severus and then picked Severus up and threw him against a wall, and Severus could feel his bones shatter.
"I DIDN'T MEAN TO!" He screamed now, and the bear which he was clutching fell to the floor, and his father picked it up, before tearing it up, that was the bear which his mother had left for him, Severus felt tears trickle down through the pain, and he saw the bear being torn.
"OUT!" His father screeched, before taking Severus and throwing him out into the snow, and then the mauled bear after him.
With a crunch sound, Severus fell onto the snow, and he sat there, gathering his knees to his face and cried, he sobbed there in the cold, his whole body shaking, every movement was pain, but he couldn't' stop himself.
He could hear his father coming, and he ran. He picked up the bear and ran, although it hurt like hell to even move. He didn't' know how far he had run but he finally collapsed with fear and exhaustion, and he could feel his muscles cramp. He saw how battered and bruised his arms were, and he looked at the bear in his hands.
"I'm really sorry mummy." He softly cried, but then his father's words and he wondered if his mother was yelling at him right there and then, and more tears flowed down his small face.
"I love you." He whispered quietly to himself, now curling up into a ball, and rocking slowly, still holding the bear in his bruised hands.
"Why didn't you take me with you?" He sobbed, not looking up, "I want to follow you, I don't want to stay here." He looked up at the stars in the sky, "TAKE ME! WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME TOO!"
His ribs hurt and he was shivering, he felt his bear, and found the stitch which had his name on it, "Severus"
"Why did you give birth to me when you knew you would die?" Little Severus sobbed quietly, "Take me now please mummy, I don't' want to live anymore. I have no where to go, I have nothing to eat. I'm tired and cold. Papa hates me, and I have no where to run to, no one to hug, nobody loves me and I just want to lie here and die, it seems so much cooler here."
It was Christmas Eve, Severus thought, I thought Papa had brought home a present for me. He spread himself out, and he felt the coldness overcome him, and he slowly lost consciousness, but he fainted away with a smile, thinking about what his mother could have been like.
REALITY
Snape opened his eyes slowly, and found himself in the Infirmary, trying to remember what had happened hurt, and he just lay there thinking about nothing, slowly watching little snippets of bitterness in his life pass him by. Like when, James Potter and Sirius Black had fooled him to going to the Whomping Willow and he had nearly died. Dumbledore had informed his father, and Severus had received a long vindictive letter asking why he hadn't just remained there and died, maybe that would have done the world a favour.
Snape had built up a shield around himself, he wasn't going to get hurt anymore. However, he was still human, and the insults spoken so loudly and freely did cut very deep, and he had no real friends. He was all alone by himself, and he found that he just walked around every day, looking for some purpose in life. He really could not care anymore that people were dying outside Hogwarts life, he hoped that he could just die one day, perhaps then he would go somewhere he could be loved.
Slowly a lone tear trickled down his face, and he heard Evans' and Potter's voice ringing out in the silence. He sighed when he realized that nobody could ever care about him in that way, nobody would miss him if he did ever die. He heard Evan yelling about how James was unconscious, and he could feel the concern in her voice. He wondered if he could ever feel for someone like how Evans evidently felt for Potter. That was weird, he thought, Evans hates Potter. Wait no, Potter wrote the letters. Severus never had a social life, except maybe occasionally walking in Lucius's shadow, but that never was fun. So, Severus spent most of his time observing, and he finally found out that Potter was writing love notes to Evans but Evans didn't' know. It all started as a prank he supposed, but slowly Potter began to feel for her.
Snape's POV
Sigh, Gryffindors were so foolish and sensitive, crying over the smallest things. Then what happened? Oh yes, they had an argument? Wait no there was something before that. He had gone into Malfoy's bedroom, and Malfoy was brewing a potion. Malfoy always had his eye on the pureblooded Kimberly from Gryffindor, if that was what she was called. Snape had overheard that Kim liked Remus, or was it that Remus liked Kim? Oh well, he never had any head for gossip.
Malfoy suddenly stunned me, yes that was it. Then what happened? ARGH! I can't remember a single thing, he must have used some sort of neuro binder, damn him.
THIRD PERSON POV
Snape closed his eyes, hoping that maybe he would be able to get some rest, he felt very tired all of a sudden, he suddenly wished he hadn't.
FLASHBACK
"Severus, it was all a joke, get it?" Laughed Rachel Avery, one of the prettiest girls in Slytherin.
"I can't believe you fell for it!" Giggled her best friend, Irene Nott, and they both walked away laughing.
"You thought she actually liked you?" Snickered Lucius, as the second year Severus stood there, stunned. He had a gift in his hands, and in it was "You fell for it" It was Christmas, and he had a steady girlfriend, the fourth year Rachel Avery, but apparently it was a dare. Who could stay with the ugly Severus anyway?
He had given Rachel a beautiful crystal globe as she loved Divination, he had saved since Easter for it, which was when Rachel had asked him out, much to his surprise. The globe was now shattered on the floor, Rachel had dropped it with a sickly sweet, "oops!" She then gave him her present, he opened it hesitantly, something told him something was wrong. It was all a trick, a prank.
Severus had been embarrassed in front of the whole Slytherin house, it was Christmas morning and all Slytherin was there comparing and exchanging presents of dark arts and other stuff.
"How pathetic can you get Snape?" Chortled a seventh year, and the whole house burst into laughter, and Severus fled away into his bedroom, where he found that people had torn his robes and poured paint in his trunk, no doubt a "Gryffindor" prank as the paint was red and gold.
"Die oil head." Was plastered all over his trunk and he just sat on the floor, not able to cry. He just sat there not moving and not saying a single word, for a long long time. He didn't' know how come they hated him so much, maybe it was because Severus hung around Lucius so much, and Malfoy was hated by the "Marauders" But it wasn't fair, he hadn't done anything, and slowly rage overtook him, he was going to block out everyone. Nobody crossed him, he was going to get back at everyone, make them wish that they were never born.
REALITY
Snape woke up suddenly, and he saw Lily standing there, looking at him as though he was the plague.
"Evans." He said coolly and Lily looked at him with something which looked like fear, and Snape looked surprised.
"Get away from me you pervert." Lily hissed, and Snape flinched.
LILY'S POV
Did Snape just flinch? That's not like him, don't tell me Peter gave him some personality reversal potion. Wait a second, Snape's eyes, why are they grey? I thought that his eyes were brown? That sickly shit brown.
"Why are your eyes grey?" I asked hesitantly, and Snape immediately put his hand to his face, stupid git, what did he think he could do?
"Look in the mirror," I suggested, something nagging at the back of my brain. Green eyes, green eyes, OH MY GOD. I KNEW WHAT HAD HAPPENED. Severus was being controlled, by someone with grey eyes, Remus? No, wait Lucius had grey eyes, yes grey cold eyes. Maybe him? But why would he control his best friend? Maybe Severus and him aren't as close as I thought they were, wait did I just call him Severus?
"WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME?" Screamed Snape, a tortured scream and I saw him collapse onto the ground, and I saw him get closer towards me, but I could see Snape struggling, not a pretty sight.
"Lily," He choked out, and I could hear the fear and pain in his voice, "Run."
