Disclaimer: RK and all those related to it aren't mine. I merely borrowed
them for my story.
A.N. Well, the conclusion of this story begins with this chapter. I hope you like it!
R&R!
Enjoy!
______________________________________________
Secrets of the Revolution
Chapter 10
A week had passed since the attack on Okubo. Hideki had returned to her former self, the manslayer. She had burned the kimono and returned to the bandages, gi, hakama, and swords. For all intents and purposes, 'Sakura' was dead.
Himura watched Hideki spar from across the yard. It was all she had done since she got up the morning after her attack. She didn't talk about it, she didn't even mention it. The fact that she ignored the attack grated on Himura's nerves. The fact that she wouldn't talk about it bothered him even more. But the fact that she was once again denying her gender pushed him over the edge. Standing up, he grabbed his sword and walked over to where she was practicing.
"Hideki, I challenge you." Himura said flatly. It was his last resort; his last chance to get her to talk. She paused in her training and looked at him.
"Challenge accepted." She said and turned to face him. Himura crouched in the battoujutsu position. He knew what he was going to do: one single blow, with all his strength behind it. If his plan worked, she would be explaining exactly what happened in a matter of moments.
Hideki recognized the stance. Himura's battoujutsu. She had been at the receiving end of that a week ago. She pushed the thought from her head, as she had been doing ever since that night, and assumed the same position. She wouldn't let him pull that stunt again.
In the blink of an eye, Himura charged his friend and pulled out his sword. At the same time, she mirrored his actions. The blades crashed together, and both manslayers finished the arc of the battoujutsu. Himura righted himself and re-sheathed his sword. Hideki stared down at her katana.
The blade had been snapped in half.
"You broke my sword." She said simply. She was absolutely astounded. Her sword was a Shakku original, a sword forged especially for her by Arai Shakku. And Himura had just snapped it in half!
"I did."
"Why?"
"Because it was the only way to win."
"Why would you want to win this badly?" she asked, still utterly amazed that her Shakku original had been destroyed.
"Because I wanted you to owe me something."
"What the hell do I owe you?! You just snapped my sword in half!" she yelled. She glared up at Himura and threw her piece of scrap metal to the ground in disgust.
"You owe me an explanation, Sakura!" Himura yelled. Hideki flinched at that name. The memories that flooded her mind were almost more than she could bear. "Tell me what happened." His voice was softer. Hideki's legs went weak under her. She sank slowly to the ground and gripped the hilt of her broken sword. Tears that she hadn't allowed to flow for the last week suddenly appeared in her eyes and slowly leaked down her face. Himura crouched next to her, not touching her, just staring at her grief stricken face.
"I was bringing tea to some of the men. They were talking about their leader, Shiro's, plan to attack Okubo. I don't know how he knew that Okubo was coming, but he did. I felt that I had to get out and tell you. When I turned to leave, someone grabbed my wrist and pulled me into a room." She said softly, staring down at the ground. She bent her head low, her bangs falling into her face and her hair, which was tied back in a high ponytail, fell over her shoulder. Her tears continued to flow and fell to the dirt below. Himura still stared, not touching her. Resisting the urge to pull her into his arms and comfort her.
"It was Shiro and two other men from the squad. They said it was time I learned a lesson. One of them tied my hands together and then all three forced me to the floor. I couldn't move. They had me pinned by my ankles and hands. I was totally defenceless. And I was scared. It was the first time I felt real fear." She whispered. Her free hand clenched into a fist, disturbing the dirt below her hand. "You were right. It was stupid of me to go in there. I was asking for it."
Himura's hands fisted in his hakama and he bit his tongue. He wanted to straighten her out, to comfort her, to be a brother figure for her. He also wanted to shake her and tell her she was wrong. That what had happened wasn't her fault. But he didn't. He wanted her to finish her story.
"They raped me. All three of them. Shiro twice. Kami-sama it hurt so much." She choked on her words. Himura remembered the blood on the floor and her thighs. It had been her innocence. He grew increasingly angry with every heartbeat, with ever word, with every tear. "I couldn't stop them. It hurt so much."
Himura relented and pulled the weeping girl into his arms. She broke down completely and he stomped down his anger at the three men who caused her the pain she was in. They were already dead. He wouldn't have to hunt them down and kill them. Although at that moment he really wished they were alive so he could. At that thought, Himura snapped out of his bloody trance. Everything made sense. Why Hideki had broken down and killed all those people. Including the women.
She had lost control, just like Himura felt himself moments before. She escaped into her mind to avoid the feeling of the rape and the demon within her took over. Its thirst for blood was what drove her to kill those men, the women and the innkeeper. It was revenge that caused her to seek out the shinsengumi squad, not the urge to protect Okubo. She had wanted to kill the man that had reduced her to such a weakling. And she had succeeded.
"Shh, it's all over Hideki. No one else will hurt you. I swear." Kenshin crooned into her ear softly. He purposefully used the name 'Hideki' just so she wouldn't flinch as she had been doing whenever she heard the name 'Sakura'.
"Kami-sama, it was the first time I ever pleaded for help. I was screaming in my head. They had gagged me, but the people of the inn wouldn't have come anyways even if they had heard me. I prayed that you would show up. I cried your name, Kenshin, praying that you would come stop them." She whispered. "But you didn't come, and that's alright. I deserved it. I was asking for it."
The fact that she was blaming herself for what those bastards did and the fact that she had cried out for him, and that he hadn't been able to protect her was the manslayer's undoing. It had been three years since he cried. But holding the defeated form of Hideki broke down that barrier and he felt tears leak out from his eyes. His fault. It was his fault that she had been raped. He didn't stop her from participating in Katsura's plan. He wasn't there to protect her from men like Shiro. He should have been there!
"Listen to me Hideki." Kenshin said as he grabbed the sides of her face and forced her to look into his eyes. "What happened wasn't your fault! And you can't ever think that again! You didn't deserve what they did to you. No woman does!" he exclaimed.
She looked up at him in amazement. He was crying. For her. He hugged her close again, crushing her to him. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you, Hideki. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. Kami-sama! What good is Hiten Mitsurugi if I can't protect those who mean the most to me!"
Hideki pulled away, reached up and cupped his scarred cheek. Kenshin opened his eyes and looked at her. "You don't need to apologise. And you've always protected me. You stopped me from killing more people that night. Thank you for that." She said softly. Kenshin smiled down at her.
In the end, he knew that she would be okay. She was made of something stronger than he could ever be. But he would forever feel a tinge of guilt and pain at the suffering she endured. Hideki smiled up at him. "You owe me a new sword, Himura." She picked up the hilt and flashed it in front of his face. He took the sword from her.
"Maybe you should take this as a hint that it's time you left the Imperialists?" he chuckled, waving the broken sword in her face as they stood up. In one swift motion, she grabbed his sword and pulled it from its saya.
"Maybe you should take it as a hint to give me your sword and leave the Imperialists yourself?" she said simply. Kenshin smiled at her.
"I still have things to do here. I'll know when it's time for me to leave. And when I do, I'll put down my sword and never kill again." He said.
Hideki could only smile in reply. She could never put down her sword. Her hands were too stained. She would live by the sword, and die by the sword.
Himura should do the same.
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Hideki walked towards the small house on the outskirts of Kyoto. Her footfalls were silent as she made her way around the back. From behind the walls, she could hear the tell tale sounds of a sword being forged.
"Sumimasen!" she called. The noises stopped and seconds later the door swung open. Arai Shakku stood before her. He glared down at the manslayer before him.
"You haven't changed one bit in four years Hideki." He grumbled, turning and walking back into his workshop, leaving the door open so Hideki could enter.
"Thank you, I think." She said as she walked in. She had been right; he had been forging a new sword. He picked up the sword and sheathed it in a wooden saya before she could see it.
"You shouldn't. You still look like a kid, and yet you're a murderer." He grumbled, placing his latest creation on the table in front of him.
Hideki winced. Conversations with Shakku were always the same. He was a brilliant sword maker. Samurai from all over Japan wanted one of his swords. But he hated making them. He hated all the killing. He hated the war. But he also hated the former regime. And he knew the war was necessary for the birth of a new era.
"What do you want?"
Hideki rolled her eyes at the Shakku's back. "I want a new sword."
"What? What the hell is wrong with that one?" he exclaimed, turning and pointing at the sword at Hideki's side. She grabbed the hilt and unsheathed it.
Shakku stared in amazement at the perfect sword he had made where half its blade was missing.
"How the hell did that happen?!"
"Battousai."
"I thought you two were comrades!" He exclaimed grabbing the sword from Hideki's hands.
"He wanted to teach me a lesson." Hideki said simply. Shakku brought the sword to the work table, gently put his newest creation off to the side and placed the broken masterpiece down.
"Did it have to be at the expense of a perfectly good sword?" he sighed and ran a finger along the dull side of the sword and over the cut mark.
"Yes."
"I suppose this is a good thing. One less killer sword made by me out there." Shakku said.
"I need a new one." Hideki repeated. Shakku turned and smiled over his shoulder at the manslayer behind him.
"This sword is my last creation." He said, gesturing to the sword with a wooden hilt and sheathed in a wooden saya. "It is a holy sword; it will never be used to shed blood."
Hideki glanced at the holy sword. She knew the ritual for forging a holy sword. It was tradition for the sword maker to forge two identical swords. One, the holy sword, would be the principle forge of the sword. Strongest of the two. The other would still be a good sword. His other words finally penetrated Hideki's thoughts.
"Last creation? What do you mean?"
"I'm not making any more killer swords. I'm through." Shakku said.
"But you're swords are the best Shakku-san! You can't just stop making them! We need your swords if we're to win!" Hideki protested. Shakku started to laugh.
"Boy, you may have taken hundreds of lives with your hands. But I've taken thousands of lives with my swords. I won't soil my hands any more. I've done all I can to build the new era. I stopped my killing. And you should stop yours." He said, turning to face the stunned Hitokiri. Hideki stared at the man before her.
'And I should stop mine.'
"Shakku-san. I plan to stop my killing once I feel my time here is over. But right now, there is still a war to be fought. And I don't plan to stop killing until I feel peace is close at hand. And I never plan to put my sword down. I've taken many lives in my life. I live by the sword, and I'll die by the sword." Hideki said firmly.
Shakku stared at the boy before him. 'He's smarter than I thought', Shakku mused.
"I don't think you have a choice when it comes to putting down your sword. You don't have one anymore." Shakku said pointing to the empty saya at Hideki's hip.
"And once again, that's why I'm here. I want a new sword."
"And once again, I've stopped making swords." Shakku said in exasperation. Gods that boy was stubborn!
"What about the second forge of your holy sword? I know the process and rituals of forging Holy Swords Shakku-san. I know you have another sword made." Hideki said, pointing to the wood encased sword on the table. Shakku glanced over at the sword, a slow smile spread across his face.
"You're absolutely right. I do have another sword." He said and left the room to retrieve it. He returned moments later with a sword sheathed in a saya and held out to Hideki. "I think you'll find this to your liking."
Hideki grasped the hilt and pulled the sword slowly from its sheath. Her eyes widened as the sword slid from its saya, revealing its long polished blade.
"What the hell?" Hideki gasped. Shakku smiled.
"That's a reverse blade sword. A sakabatou." Shakku laughed "I'd like to see you try and kill someone with that."
Hideki looked at the full length of the blade. The curved side was sharp, the longer side was dull. Reverse bladed. Why would Arai Shakku, master of forging killer swords, make a reverse blade sword as his final sword?
'Atonement.' A voice echoed in the back of her mind.
"It's heavy." Hideki murmured to herself.
"It's a sword that's never meant to kill. You've taken many lives with your hands. It will always be heavy to someone such as you." Shakku said. His smile had vanished and he was staring at the manslayer before him holding the sword.
"I don't think I could handle this sword." Hideki said uneasily. Shakku held out the saya and Hideki re-sheathed it quickly, glad to have the heavy object out of her hands.
"It's a piece of scrap. I'm not sure what I'll do with it, who would use a reverse blade sword?" Shakku said as he took the sword and placed it on the table next to the principle forge.
Hideki gazed at the swords on the table. The uneasy feeling never left her. She knew that she would never be able to put down her sword, but she would be able to stop killing people. Having a reverse blade sword would be very useful. Especially if using a sword to protect was a manslayers way for atonement.
Looking at the two reverse blade swords caused a chill to run through her. She resisted the urge to rub her arms.
Someone once told Hideki that a true sword master knows when a sword was never meant to be theirs. They can feel it just from holding the sword. Hideki had held many swords in her life. All instruments of death. None of them ever gave her the creepy feeling that sakabatou had.
No, she would never handle the reverse blade sword.
A voice entered her mind as she stared at the swords.
"I'll put down my sword and never kill again."
Himura's voice.
The words reverberated through Hideki's whole being as she stared at the two reverse bladed swords.
Hitokiri Battousai should never put down his sword.
Not after all the lives he's taken.
The reverse blade sword was meant for him.
"I know exactly who would use a reverse blade sword." Hideki said.
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Hideki entered the training grounds quietly. It was near dusk. She had been gone all day. Kenshin would be worried.
She laughed. Kenshin shouldn't worry, but that was part of his sweetness. He always worried.
Shakku had found an older sword of his, it was worn slightly, but it was still a good sword. He gave it to Hideki to replace her broken katana.
She reflected on her day spent in the company of Shakku and his son. The boy didn't particularly like his father. Nor did he like Hideki for that matter. The boy was smart. He knew what his father did for a living and hated him for it. He also knew in seconds that Hideki was a manslayer. His feelings for the samurai were immediately portrayed when he threw rocks at her and ran away.
Not that she could blame the boy. No child liked her.
Children were smarter than any adult could even conceive. The only reason Hideki knew was because at heart she longed to be a child. She understood them better than most adults. Children could always tell the good from the bad and right from wrong. Shakku's son was no different. He knew that Hideki was bad. And whatever she did to make her bad, was wrong.
Hideki sighed as she entered the house. She liked kids. But her soul was tainted, jaded and black. No child wanted to be near her.
"Tadaima." Hideki said as she entered the kitchen to find Kenshin busy preparing a simple evening meal.
"Okaeri, Hideki. Did you get a new sword, de gozaru ka?" Kenshin asked, not turning from the vegetables before him.
Hideki found herself lost in thought staring at the back of Kenshin's red head. Only when he wasn't locked in a heated battle did he add the 'de gozaru' to the end of his sentences. Hideki doubted he even noticed the change in tone and words.
"I'll put down my sword and never kill again." Kenshin's voice in her head again.
No, he won't put down his sword. He shouldn't. And after a long conversation with Shakku, he wouldn't.
"Hai. Shakku-san had an extra that I could use. It's a good sword. It will serve me well. Just don't break this one, alright?" Hideki grinned. Kenshin smiled at her over his shoulder and continued to chop vegetables.
"Yes ma'am." He chuckled.
'He's happy living this way.' Hideki thought. 'He's happy doing the most mundane household chores. His time is almost at an end here in Kyoto. I can feel it. So can he.'
There was a long drawn out silence in the room. Kenshin's chopping had stopped. The atmosphere seemed to change in a second. He could feel her staring at him. He quietly brought the knife down, chopping a radish in half.
He knew what she was thinking, and she knew what he was thinking. Their thoughts were the same.
"What are you going to do?" she asked softly.
"Find a path where I don't have to kill for peace. A path where I can live freely, without killing people." He replied, chopping another radish. "And a path where I can protect others."
A path. Wandering down a path, looking for atonement and protecting those he would encounter. A wanderer.
A rurouni.
"Rurouni Kenshin."
"Aa."
Hideki smiled. The name fit his personality. He would be a rurouni. He would protect people, with his reverse blade sword.
"Himura! Hideki! Are you here?" a voice called from outside. Hideki turned and went to the front door, and opened it to find Takasugi standing before them, breathing deeply and sweating.
"Takasugi-san! Are you alright?" Hideki asked opening the door wider to admit the man as Himura came up behind her.
"I'm fine. You two need to come with me right now. Katsura wants to see you." He said. With no hesitation, Himura and Hideki followed Takasugi back to Kyoto.
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A.N. Okay, it was more of a filler chapter than anything, but not really, ya know? I always wanted to know why Shakku decided to give Kenshin the reverse-blade sword. How did he know Kenshin would need or want it? Yet another way to fit Hideki into Kenshin's life.
I wanted to clarify something with my readers. It regarding Kenshin and his 'bloodlust'. I know that Tomoe calmed him immensely and gave him the strength to combat his bloodlust and I think that's a key part of Kenshin. However, I don't think that it calmed his anger. Everyone gets angry at something, it's just a matter of how angry and what will it take to get that angry.
Personally, I don't view Kenshin and Battousai as separate beings. I think Kenshin is Kenshin, and Battousai is Kenshin. Battousai was a nickname given to Kenshin, it wasn't a name given to another person within Kenshin. Kenshin may not succumb to bloodlust anymore (thanks to Tomoe) but he still gets mad. REALLY mad. That's why I wrote him threatening Katsura, that's why I wrote that he wanted to kill that random squad of shinsengumi. It wasn't because he was out for blood, it was because he was REALLY pissed that Sakura had been hurt.
We all saw him with Jin'eh. Kenshin + super angry = one PO'ed man, aka Battousai.
Anyways, that's my rant on Kenshin. He doesn't suffer from multiple personalities (as many people have depicted) he just gets mad, like any other normal human being.
A.N. Well, the conclusion of this story begins with this chapter. I hope you like it!
R&R!
Enjoy!
______________________________________________
Secrets of the Revolution
Chapter 10
A week had passed since the attack on Okubo. Hideki had returned to her former self, the manslayer. She had burned the kimono and returned to the bandages, gi, hakama, and swords. For all intents and purposes, 'Sakura' was dead.
Himura watched Hideki spar from across the yard. It was all she had done since she got up the morning after her attack. She didn't talk about it, she didn't even mention it. The fact that she ignored the attack grated on Himura's nerves. The fact that she wouldn't talk about it bothered him even more. But the fact that she was once again denying her gender pushed him over the edge. Standing up, he grabbed his sword and walked over to where she was practicing.
"Hideki, I challenge you." Himura said flatly. It was his last resort; his last chance to get her to talk. She paused in her training and looked at him.
"Challenge accepted." She said and turned to face him. Himura crouched in the battoujutsu position. He knew what he was going to do: one single blow, with all his strength behind it. If his plan worked, she would be explaining exactly what happened in a matter of moments.
Hideki recognized the stance. Himura's battoujutsu. She had been at the receiving end of that a week ago. She pushed the thought from her head, as she had been doing ever since that night, and assumed the same position. She wouldn't let him pull that stunt again.
In the blink of an eye, Himura charged his friend and pulled out his sword. At the same time, she mirrored his actions. The blades crashed together, and both manslayers finished the arc of the battoujutsu. Himura righted himself and re-sheathed his sword. Hideki stared down at her katana.
The blade had been snapped in half.
"You broke my sword." She said simply. She was absolutely astounded. Her sword was a Shakku original, a sword forged especially for her by Arai Shakku. And Himura had just snapped it in half!
"I did."
"Why?"
"Because it was the only way to win."
"Why would you want to win this badly?" she asked, still utterly amazed that her Shakku original had been destroyed.
"Because I wanted you to owe me something."
"What the hell do I owe you?! You just snapped my sword in half!" she yelled. She glared up at Himura and threw her piece of scrap metal to the ground in disgust.
"You owe me an explanation, Sakura!" Himura yelled. Hideki flinched at that name. The memories that flooded her mind were almost more than she could bear. "Tell me what happened." His voice was softer. Hideki's legs went weak under her. She sank slowly to the ground and gripped the hilt of her broken sword. Tears that she hadn't allowed to flow for the last week suddenly appeared in her eyes and slowly leaked down her face. Himura crouched next to her, not touching her, just staring at her grief stricken face.
"I was bringing tea to some of the men. They were talking about their leader, Shiro's, plan to attack Okubo. I don't know how he knew that Okubo was coming, but he did. I felt that I had to get out and tell you. When I turned to leave, someone grabbed my wrist and pulled me into a room." She said softly, staring down at the ground. She bent her head low, her bangs falling into her face and her hair, which was tied back in a high ponytail, fell over her shoulder. Her tears continued to flow and fell to the dirt below. Himura still stared, not touching her. Resisting the urge to pull her into his arms and comfort her.
"It was Shiro and two other men from the squad. They said it was time I learned a lesson. One of them tied my hands together and then all three forced me to the floor. I couldn't move. They had me pinned by my ankles and hands. I was totally defenceless. And I was scared. It was the first time I felt real fear." She whispered. Her free hand clenched into a fist, disturbing the dirt below her hand. "You were right. It was stupid of me to go in there. I was asking for it."
Himura's hands fisted in his hakama and he bit his tongue. He wanted to straighten her out, to comfort her, to be a brother figure for her. He also wanted to shake her and tell her she was wrong. That what had happened wasn't her fault. But he didn't. He wanted her to finish her story.
"They raped me. All three of them. Shiro twice. Kami-sama it hurt so much." She choked on her words. Himura remembered the blood on the floor and her thighs. It had been her innocence. He grew increasingly angry with every heartbeat, with ever word, with every tear. "I couldn't stop them. It hurt so much."
Himura relented and pulled the weeping girl into his arms. She broke down completely and he stomped down his anger at the three men who caused her the pain she was in. They were already dead. He wouldn't have to hunt them down and kill them. Although at that moment he really wished they were alive so he could. At that thought, Himura snapped out of his bloody trance. Everything made sense. Why Hideki had broken down and killed all those people. Including the women.
She had lost control, just like Himura felt himself moments before. She escaped into her mind to avoid the feeling of the rape and the demon within her took over. Its thirst for blood was what drove her to kill those men, the women and the innkeeper. It was revenge that caused her to seek out the shinsengumi squad, not the urge to protect Okubo. She had wanted to kill the man that had reduced her to such a weakling. And she had succeeded.
"Shh, it's all over Hideki. No one else will hurt you. I swear." Kenshin crooned into her ear softly. He purposefully used the name 'Hideki' just so she wouldn't flinch as she had been doing whenever she heard the name 'Sakura'.
"Kami-sama, it was the first time I ever pleaded for help. I was screaming in my head. They had gagged me, but the people of the inn wouldn't have come anyways even if they had heard me. I prayed that you would show up. I cried your name, Kenshin, praying that you would come stop them." She whispered. "But you didn't come, and that's alright. I deserved it. I was asking for it."
The fact that she was blaming herself for what those bastards did and the fact that she had cried out for him, and that he hadn't been able to protect her was the manslayer's undoing. It had been three years since he cried. But holding the defeated form of Hideki broke down that barrier and he felt tears leak out from his eyes. His fault. It was his fault that she had been raped. He didn't stop her from participating in Katsura's plan. He wasn't there to protect her from men like Shiro. He should have been there!
"Listen to me Hideki." Kenshin said as he grabbed the sides of her face and forced her to look into his eyes. "What happened wasn't your fault! And you can't ever think that again! You didn't deserve what they did to you. No woman does!" he exclaimed.
She looked up at him in amazement. He was crying. For her. He hugged her close again, crushing her to him. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you, Hideki. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. Kami-sama! What good is Hiten Mitsurugi if I can't protect those who mean the most to me!"
Hideki pulled away, reached up and cupped his scarred cheek. Kenshin opened his eyes and looked at her. "You don't need to apologise. And you've always protected me. You stopped me from killing more people that night. Thank you for that." She said softly. Kenshin smiled down at her.
In the end, he knew that she would be okay. She was made of something stronger than he could ever be. But he would forever feel a tinge of guilt and pain at the suffering she endured. Hideki smiled up at him. "You owe me a new sword, Himura." She picked up the hilt and flashed it in front of his face. He took the sword from her.
"Maybe you should take this as a hint that it's time you left the Imperialists?" he chuckled, waving the broken sword in her face as they stood up. In one swift motion, she grabbed his sword and pulled it from its saya.
"Maybe you should take it as a hint to give me your sword and leave the Imperialists yourself?" she said simply. Kenshin smiled at her.
"I still have things to do here. I'll know when it's time for me to leave. And when I do, I'll put down my sword and never kill again." He said.
Hideki could only smile in reply. She could never put down her sword. Her hands were too stained. She would live by the sword, and die by the sword.
Himura should do the same.
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Hideki walked towards the small house on the outskirts of Kyoto. Her footfalls were silent as she made her way around the back. From behind the walls, she could hear the tell tale sounds of a sword being forged.
"Sumimasen!" she called. The noises stopped and seconds later the door swung open. Arai Shakku stood before her. He glared down at the manslayer before him.
"You haven't changed one bit in four years Hideki." He grumbled, turning and walking back into his workshop, leaving the door open so Hideki could enter.
"Thank you, I think." She said as she walked in. She had been right; he had been forging a new sword. He picked up the sword and sheathed it in a wooden saya before she could see it.
"You shouldn't. You still look like a kid, and yet you're a murderer." He grumbled, placing his latest creation on the table in front of him.
Hideki winced. Conversations with Shakku were always the same. He was a brilliant sword maker. Samurai from all over Japan wanted one of his swords. But he hated making them. He hated all the killing. He hated the war. But he also hated the former regime. And he knew the war was necessary for the birth of a new era.
"What do you want?"
Hideki rolled her eyes at the Shakku's back. "I want a new sword."
"What? What the hell is wrong with that one?" he exclaimed, turning and pointing at the sword at Hideki's side. She grabbed the hilt and unsheathed it.
Shakku stared in amazement at the perfect sword he had made where half its blade was missing.
"How the hell did that happen?!"
"Battousai."
"I thought you two were comrades!" He exclaimed grabbing the sword from Hideki's hands.
"He wanted to teach me a lesson." Hideki said simply. Shakku brought the sword to the work table, gently put his newest creation off to the side and placed the broken masterpiece down.
"Did it have to be at the expense of a perfectly good sword?" he sighed and ran a finger along the dull side of the sword and over the cut mark.
"Yes."
"I suppose this is a good thing. One less killer sword made by me out there." Shakku said.
"I need a new one." Hideki repeated. Shakku turned and smiled over his shoulder at the manslayer behind him.
"This sword is my last creation." He said, gesturing to the sword with a wooden hilt and sheathed in a wooden saya. "It is a holy sword; it will never be used to shed blood."
Hideki glanced at the holy sword. She knew the ritual for forging a holy sword. It was tradition for the sword maker to forge two identical swords. One, the holy sword, would be the principle forge of the sword. Strongest of the two. The other would still be a good sword. His other words finally penetrated Hideki's thoughts.
"Last creation? What do you mean?"
"I'm not making any more killer swords. I'm through." Shakku said.
"But you're swords are the best Shakku-san! You can't just stop making them! We need your swords if we're to win!" Hideki protested. Shakku started to laugh.
"Boy, you may have taken hundreds of lives with your hands. But I've taken thousands of lives with my swords. I won't soil my hands any more. I've done all I can to build the new era. I stopped my killing. And you should stop yours." He said, turning to face the stunned Hitokiri. Hideki stared at the man before her.
'And I should stop mine.'
"Shakku-san. I plan to stop my killing once I feel my time here is over. But right now, there is still a war to be fought. And I don't plan to stop killing until I feel peace is close at hand. And I never plan to put my sword down. I've taken many lives in my life. I live by the sword, and I'll die by the sword." Hideki said firmly.
Shakku stared at the boy before him. 'He's smarter than I thought', Shakku mused.
"I don't think you have a choice when it comes to putting down your sword. You don't have one anymore." Shakku said pointing to the empty saya at Hideki's hip.
"And once again, that's why I'm here. I want a new sword."
"And once again, I've stopped making swords." Shakku said in exasperation. Gods that boy was stubborn!
"What about the second forge of your holy sword? I know the process and rituals of forging Holy Swords Shakku-san. I know you have another sword made." Hideki said, pointing to the wood encased sword on the table. Shakku glanced over at the sword, a slow smile spread across his face.
"You're absolutely right. I do have another sword." He said and left the room to retrieve it. He returned moments later with a sword sheathed in a saya and held out to Hideki. "I think you'll find this to your liking."
Hideki grasped the hilt and pulled the sword slowly from its sheath. Her eyes widened as the sword slid from its saya, revealing its long polished blade.
"What the hell?" Hideki gasped. Shakku smiled.
"That's a reverse blade sword. A sakabatou." Shakku laughed "I'd like to see you try and kill someone with that."
Hideki looked at the full length of the blade. The curved side was sharp, the longer side was dull. Reverse bladed. Why would Arai Shakku, master of forging killer swords, make a reverse blade sword as his final sword?
'Atonement.' A voice echoed in the back of her mind.
"It's heavy." Hideki murmured to herself.
"It's a sword that's never meant to kill. You've taken many lives with your hands. It will always be heavy to someone such as you." Shakku said. His smile had vanished and he was staring at the manslayer before him holding the sword.
"I don't think I could handle this sword." Hideki said uneasily. Shakku held out the saya and Hideki re-sheathed it quickly, glad to have the heavy object out of her hands.
"It's a piece of scrap. I'm not sure what I'll do with it, who would use a reverse blade sword?" Shakku said as he took the sword and placed it on the table next to the principle forge.
Hideki gazed at the swords on the table. The uneasy feeling never left her. She knew that she would never be able to put down her sword, but she would be able to stop killing people. Having a reverse blade sword would be very useful. Especially if using a sword to protect was a manslayers way for atonement.
Looking at the two reverse blade swords caused a chill to run through her. She resisted the urge to rub her arms.
Someone once told Hideki that a true sword master knows when a sword was never meant to be theirs. They can feel it just from holding the sword. Hideki had held many swords in her life. All instruments of death. None of them ever gave her the creepy feeling that sakabatou had.
No, she would never handle the reverse blade sword.
A voice entered her mind as she stared at the swords.
"I'll put down my sword and never kill again."
Himura's voice.
The words reverberated through Hideki's whole being as she stared at the two reverse bladed swords.
Hitokiri Battousai should never put down his sword.
Not after all the lives he's taken.
The reverse blade sword was meant for him.
"I know exactly who would use a reverse blade sword." Hideki said.
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Hideki entered the training grounds quietly. It was near dusk. She had been gone all day. Kenshin would be worried.
She laughed. Kenshin shouldn't worry, but that was part of his sweetness. He always worried.
Shakku had found an older sword of his, it was worn slightly, but it was still a good sword. He gave it to Hideki to replace her broken katana.
She reflected on her day spent in the company of Shakku and his son. The boy didn't particularly like his father. Nor did he like Hideki for that matter. The boy was smart. He knew what his father did for a living and hated him for it. He also knew in seconds that Hideki was a manslayer. His feelings for the samurai were immediately portrayed when he threw rocks at her and ran away.
Not that she could blame the boy. No child liked her.
Children were smarter than any adult could even conceive. The only reason Hideki knew was because at heart she longed to be a child. She understood them better than most adults. Children could always tell the good from the bad and right from wrong. Shakku's son was no different. He knew that Hideki was bad. And whatever she did to make her bad, was wrong.
Hideki sighed as she entered the house. She liked kids. But her soul was tainted, jaded and black. No child wanted to be near her.
"Tadaima." Hideki said as she entered the kitchen to find Kenshin busy preparing a simple evening meal.
"Okaeri, Hideki. Did you get a new sword, de gozaru ka?" Kenshin asked, not turning from the vegetables before him.
Hideki found herself lost in thought staring at the back of Kenshin's red head. Only when he wasn't locked in a heated battle did he add the 'de gozaru' to the end of his sentences. Hideki doubted he even noticed the change in tone and words.
"I'll put down my sword and never kill again." Kenshin's voice in her head again.
No, he won't put down his sword. He shouldn't. And after a long conversation with Shakku, he wouldn't.
"Hai. Shakku-san had an extra that I could use. It's a good sword. It will serve me well. Just don't break this one, alright?" Hideki grinned. Kenshin smiled at her over his shoulder and continued to chop vegetables.
"Yes ma'am." He chuckled.
'He's happy living this way.' Hideki thought. 'He's happy doing the most mundane household chores. His time is almost at an end here in Kyoto. I can feel it. So can he.'
There was a long drawn out silence in the room. Kenshin's chopping had stopped. The atmosphere seemed to change in a second. He could feel her staring at him. He quietly brought the knife down, chopping a radish in half.
He knew what she was thinking, and she knew what he was thinking. Their thoughts were the same.
"What are you going to do?" she asked softly.
"Find a path where I don't have to kill for peace. A path where I can live freely, without killing people." He replied, chopping another radish. "And a path where I can protect others."
A path. Wandering down a path, looking for atonement and protecting those he would encounter. A wanderer.
A rurouni.
"Rurouni Kenshin."
"Aa."
Hideki smiled. The name fit his personality. He would be a rurouni. He would protect people, with his reverse blade sword.
"Himura! Hideki! Are you here?" a voice called from outside. Hideki turned and went to the front door, and opened it to find Takasugi standing before them, breathing deeply and sweating.
"Takasugi-san! Are you alright?" Hideki asked opening the door wider to admit the man as Himura came up behind her.
"I'm fine. You two need to come with me right now. Katsura wants to see you." He said. With no hesitation, Himura and Hideki followed Takasugi back to Kyoto.
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A.N. Okay, it was more of a filler chapter than anything, but not really, ya know? I always wanted to know why Shakku decided to give Kenshin the reverse-blade sword. How did he know Kenshin would need or want it? Yet another way to fit Hideki into Kenshin's life.
I wanted to clarify something with my readers. It regarding Kenshin and his 'bloodlust'. I know that Tomoe calmed him immensely and gave him the strength to combat his bloodlust and I think that's a key part of Kenshin. However, I don't think that it calmed his anger. Everyone gets angry at something, it's just a matter of how angry and what will it take to get that angry.
Personally, I don't view Kenshin and Battousai as separate beings. I think Kenshin is Kenshin, and Battousai is Kenshin. Battousai was a nickname given to Kenshin, it wasn't a name given to another person within Kenshin. Kenshin may not succumb to bloodlust anymore (thanks to Tomoe) but he still gets mad. REALLY mad. That's why I wrote him threatening Katsura, that's why I wrote that he wanted to kill that random squad of shinsengumi. It wasn't because he was out for blood, it was because he was REALLY pissed that Sakura had been hurt.
We all saw him with Jin'eh. Kenshin + super angry = one PO'ed man, aka Battousai.
Anyways, that's my rant on Kenshin. He doesn't suffer from multiple personalities (as many people have depicted) he just gets mad, like any other normal human being.
