Author's Note - Hey guys! I'm back. I know it's been about two weeks, so sorry about the wait. Only one review! Well, actually, it was from two people, so it kind of counts as two. Maybe? Not really. Anyway, I'd like to thank Loathsome Warg for the review. I'm glad you liked the last update!

Disclaimer - All original plot lines and characters belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. Any new twists are mine. My own! My precious! Yeah, ok, I'll stop now. I am not mocking Tolkien's creation.

The Return of the Tree - Chapter 6

Aragorn wailed with despair as all hope began to slip from within his grasp. His aim was to make any passing people, such as the Random Passing Creature, think his quest was ultimately too difficult for any being to complete. In truth, however, he was crying because of the tree and because of his hair.

"The tree!" He cried. "I shall never be able to find it. There are simply too many trees! And my hair doesn't even look nice! This place is too large. Why can't I just govern the island where I send all the crazy elves I don't want people to know about? That would be much easier than trying to find some lame ass tree."

Realizing the person to whom he was speaking was, well, himself, Aragorn ceased his conversation. He was no nearer to completing his quest than when he had first left his home.

"Maybe I can bribe someone to find the tree for me." He resumed his conversation with himself. "Or better yet, threaten them with immense pain and unspeakable punishment! Mwahaha!"

Aragorn cleared his throat and looked around to make no one had heard his little outburst. "What were those other two hobos named? No, no, not Sam. Sam was the fat one. Pimpin' and Sherry?"

It is quite obvious now that Aragorn has trouble with names. After pondering his choices for a moment, he exclaimed, "Did Pimpin' write that rap song! The lyrics were so profound. They left such a deep impact on my life! Big Pimpin' up in NYC! I absolutely love that song."

Aragorn had finally made up his mind. He proceeded to the Shire to convince "Sherry" and "Pimpin'" to aid him in this his hour of need.

Sauron happily sang along to loud music on the radio as he cruised down the Interstate. "You see," he said to Bob, "you much search deep within yourself to find music! Lyrics are not merely words; they are expressions of one's deepest and most profound thoughts!"

Sauron was silent for a moment, but he soon resumed his thoughts about Arwen. "I used to not like Arwen. She kept trying to kill that other elf, Glorfindel. I guess she finally succeeded. I haven't heard much of old Glorfindel. He was a good pal. Arwen took credit for saving that one hobo dude."

"You were friends with an elf?" Bob chimed in.

"Uh, well, yes," Sauron cackled. "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. But actually, the elves and I go way back. I initially set up the island where they send all the crazy ones, you know. That's a great place. You should visit sometime! Nothing's better than relaxing on the beach with deranged elves at your service."

"Right," Bob said.

A/N - I hope you guys liked this chapter! I'm sorry it's short, but try and review!!!! Thanks! Lots of love, Scegan