Author's Note - The lack of reviews shall not deter me! Perhaps it will
discourage, dissuade, and cause me to be all the synonyms of deter, but it
will not actually deter me! (
Disclaimer - All original plot lines belong to Tolkien. I am not mocking his work in any way. I wish only to bring smiles. Also, I have recently been informed that I do, in fact, own CVS Pharmacies! Wahoo. (Watch the people from CVS come sue me.)
The Return of the Tree - Chapter Seven
Frodo approached the hall where a formal banquet was being held in honor of his arrival. He was slightly freaked out about the possibility he was on an island full of insane elves, but he did not let it dampen his spirits. An elf waited by the door of the hall; he smiled as Frodo drew closer.
"Ah, my friend, the hall shall be ready for you shortly. We apologize; we did not expect your arrival to be so soon."
"Please, do not let me trouble you. Take your time." Frodo felt relieved. This elf seemed normal.
However, Frodo's calm feelings were short-lived. At that moment, another elf ran out of hall, chasing a chicken, which, frankly, looked quite terrified. If it is possible for a chicken to look terrified. If Frodo were not so frightened, the sight of a cackling elf chasing a chicken around in circled would have been quite amusing. However, it's one of those stories that frightens you at first, but makes you laugh later.
"Sorry about that, sir," the elf said after he had obtained his bird. "Ritual cult sacrifice day, you know. It's a big deal around here."
"Clayton!" The elf standing by the door snarled. "He's not supposed to know about our s-e-c-r-e-t c-u-l-t."
"Do you think I don't know you're spelling out secret cult?" Frodo was very confused. These elves were quite deranged.
"Uh, right, no," Clayton said. "Well, I must go, uh, cook this bird for you to eat. No sacrifices are going on here."
Frodo nodded, but still felt quite unsure of this whole elf island. I should have known, he thought to himself. A whole island full of elves. What made me think they'd be sane?
~
Pippin hummed merrily to himself. He enjoyed spending days by himself, thinking about very stupid things. By stupid things I mean he wonders why Seven Eleven has locks on the doors, when they are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
Aragorn saw Pippin skipping merrily around. "Here's my chance," Aragorn said aloud. "I can capture this unsuspecting hobo, and he'll help me find the tree! Mwahaha! This shall be most fun. I must be cunning. This hobo looks like a supremely intelligent creature. He will most likely put up a fight."
Don't ask how Aragorn got from Gondor to the Shire in such a short time. He has supernatural powers. That is the answer to everything, is it not?
"Hello friend!" Aragorn called. "Come join me in my quest for the tree!"
Pippin looked up and shrieked with delight. "It's the one guy who was always trying to snag all the glory! He really knew how to show off with a sword! Tolkien and Peter Jackson, uh, I mean the other members of the quest had to subdue him a lot."
"Uh, right," Aragorn said. I knew this one was smart, he thought to himself.
"Hey," Pippin said suddenly, "if pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?"
"Um, I don't know," Aragorn looked confused. "Intelligent questions such as the ones this hobo is posing confuse me," he muttered to himself. "This must be part of his psychological warfare."
"So," Aragorn said after a moment. "How about the tree?"
"Oh yeah, that," Pippin said. "Sure, why not?"
"Wow," Aragorn smiled, "that was easy. But I must be on my guard. This interesting creature will most likely try and thwart me at a latter date."
That's all for today! Hope you enjoyed.
Should I even bother asking for reviews?
Disclaimer - All original plot lines belong to Tolkien. I am not mocking his work in any way. I wish only to bring smiles. Also, I have recently been informed that I do, in fact, own CVS Pharmacies! Wahoo. (Watch the people from CVS come sue me.)
The Return of the Tree - Chapter Seven
Frodo approached the hall where a formal banquet was being held in honor of his arrival. He was slightly freaked out about the possibility he was on an island full of insane elves, but he did not let it dampen his spirits. An elf waited by the door of the hall; he smiled as Frodo drew closer.
"Ah, my friend, the hall shall be ready for you shortly. We apologize; we did not expect your arrival to be so soon."
"Please, do not let me trouble you. Take your time." Frodo felt relieved. This elf seemed normal.
However, Frodo's calm feelings were short-lived. At that moment, another elf ran out of hall, chasing a chicken, which, frankly, looked quite terrified. If it is possible for a chicken to look terrified. If Frodo were not so frightened, the sight of a cackling elf chasing a chicken around in circled would have been quite amusing. However, it's one of those stories that frightens you at first, but makes you laugh later.
"Sorry about that, sir," the elf said after he had obtained his bird. "Ritual cult sacrifice day, you know. It's a big deal around here."
"Clayton!" The elf standing by the door snarled. "He's not supposed to know about our s-e-c-r-e-t c-u-l-t."
"Do you think I don't know you're spelling out secret cult?" Frodo was very confused. These elves were quite deranged.
"Uh, right, no," Clayton said. "Well, I must go, uh, cook this bird for you to eat. No sacrifices are going on here."
Frodo nodded, but still felt quite unsure of this whole elf island. I should have known, he thought to himself. A whole island full of elves. What made me think they'd be sane?
~
Pippin hummed merrily to himself. He enjoyed spending days by himself, thinking about very stupid things. By stupid things I mean he wonders why Seven Eleven has locks on the doors, when they are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
Aragorn saw Pippin skipping merrily around. "Here's my chance," Aragorn said aloud. "I can capture this unsuspecting hobo, and he'll help me find the tree! Mwahaha! This shall be most fun. I must be cunning. This hobo looks like a supremely intelligent creature. He will most likely put up a fight."
Don't ask how Aragorn got from Gondor to the Shire in such a short time. He has supernatural powers. That is the answer to everything, is it not?
"Hello friend!" Aragorn called. "Come join me in my quest for the tree!"
Pippin looked up and shrieked with delight. "It's the one guy who was always trying to snag all the glory! He really knew how to show off with a sword! Tolkien and Peter Jackson, uh, I mean the other members of the quest had to subdue him a lot."
"Uh, right," Aragorn said. I knew this one was smart, he thought to himself.
"Hey," Pippin said suddenly, "if pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?"
"Um, I don't know," Aragorn looked confused. "Intelligent questions such as the ones this hobo is posing confuse me," he muttered to himself. "This must be part of his psychological warfare."
"So," Aragorn said after a moment. "How about the tree?"
"Oh yeah, that," Pippin said. "Sure, why not?"
"Wow," Aragorn smiled, "that was easy. But I must be on my guard. This interesting creature will most likely try and thwart me at a latter date."
That's all for today! Hope you enjoyed.
Should I even bother asking for reviews?
