Discaliamer: I have nothing to do with squaresoft or final fantasy, they do,(there are 10 differnt final fantasys anyway, why can't they just decide which one is their final fantasy, DAMMIT!!!!) Uhhhh, yeah, I don't own elton john(thank god, he may try to rape me!!!!) Also, I don't own Universal Studios or The Men in Black(the truth is out ther, wait, S#$%, that's the X-files, sob..... And that's about it I hope, damn, I can't write good discliamers anymore, tut tut.....

Turtle: Where we left our heroes, a big nuclear explosion had just occured, Sephiroth can fly, and is now a cook!!!! What demented happenings will happen next, could this episode be dramatic, or will it just be stupid, ah, probably the last one(he he, I enjoy insulting my own works)

Anyway.....

Chapter 6, which may eventually be crammed into a completly differnt chapter, wah ha ha ha ha!!!!

five minutes after the explosion....

Cloud wakes up, however, he is still insane and not aware of what he's doing...

Cloud:(doing riverdance) Jimmy Crack corn, and I don't care, Jimmy crack corn, and I don't care!!!! Jimmy crack cornnnnn, and I don'ttttt caarrrrreeeee!!!!!

Peice of debris hits him on head, causing him to collapse back onto the ground.

30 minutes later....

Tifa: (waking up) huh.... where the hell am I......(looks around) oh, well then...(cricks knuckles) EVERYBODY, GET THE F%$#@@# HELL UP!!!!!!!

Everybody slowly gets up but barret, who is still out

Barret:(muttering) ohhhh, yesssss, yessssss, please, harder, harder, ohhhhh, yes cloud, yes....

Everybody: (stares at him admitting he's gay)

Barret: More, More, More, don't stop!!!!!

Everybody: Uhhhhhhh

Barret: You're getting better, oh yeahhhh, nice.... You're goooodddd.... mmmmm, so good...... AT HITTING GOLFBALLS!!!!(this is highly similar to something I read somewhere before involving rufus and lunch....)

Barret:(wakes up on own) Huh, what the hell are all you guys staring at me for???

Everyone: (silence)

Barret:(grabs yuffie and puts gun to her head)

Barret: Tell me!!!!!!!

Everyone:(silence)

Cid: (shruggs shoulders) meh....

Yuffie: oh, thanks a lot you guys

Barret pulls trigger, yuffie collapses, dead

Tifa: well, we can't revive her, we need our last pheniox down for Aeris(holds up Pheniox down, then drops it by accident, it lands on Yuffies Carcass)

Yuffie:(stands back up) Hah, you all died too, serves you right you stupid basterds!!!!

Cid: We ain't dead, and you say it like this: !@#$%^%^&&*&*^^$%$##$@%^(^(^(*&

camera goes blank for a few minutes..... eventually, it turns back on.

Yuffie is standing there dressed like George W. Bush while tied up to a cross stuck in the ground, everyone has various fruits in hand...

Yuffie: Wait..... How the hell did we get from that to george W. Being me and being hailed as a christ figure..

Barret: Yeah, it was like a flash, how did it happen

Man dressed in balck walks up to them...

Man: That's only for the Men in Black to know, now look at this...(takes out Nuerilizer, I can't spell it, Damn!!!!)

Tifa: Whats the red thing(FLASH!!!!)

Man: You remember getting really drunk and screwing anything you saw, got it....

Walks off

Tifa: Oh, my god, I used our last Pheniox down on Yuffie,(muttering) stupid ho...

Cid: Well, #@$%^&*&*^%$#@!@#$%^&*

Barret: I guess we better go to rocket town then to buy more, and figure out a way to get to The city of the ancients!!!!(creepy music plays in backround)

Tifa: Red XIII, I thought you rolled around in their carcasses, go kill them again.

Red XIII: Odio esta historia y quiero algĂșn queso ahora mismo, entonces vaya se joden

Everyone: HUH????

Red XIII: You don't wanna know what I just said.

Barret: hurls grenade at them, screams heard

Man: My hair, it's on fire!!!! Wait I don't have hair, my brain is on fire!!!!

Man: This is the sixth time this week, damn you!!!!!

Cid: Let's go.....

three days and many cans of Tequilla later.....

Cid: AH, my hold F$%#% home, it's good to the see the stupid basterd.

Cloud: Can a ford pickup truck drive in space???? Aeris, my mommy says that doctors are evil basterds, so since you try to play doctor with me, I should kill you.....

Tifa: OH MY GOD!!!!! AERIS IS JUST A DIRTY HO!!!! WE CAN'T REVIVE HER!!!!

Barret: we need her to stop Sephiroth....

Tifa: ohhhh yeeeahhhhhhh

Rocketman by elton john begins playing in backround....

Cloud suddenly snaps out of insaneness.

Cloud: Huh, where the hell am I???

Tifa: Clouds back, now he can just kill Sephiroth!!!!!

Cloud: What the hell is that annoying music????

Barret: I think it snapped him out of his seisures(reaches over and covers Clouds ears)

Cloud:(insane again) Ain't no lie, baby bye bye bye, BYE BYE!!!!

Everyone: AHHHH!!!!! Stop the evilness, oh the horror, the horror!!!!

Silence, everyone just realizes they just said the same thing

Everyone: That was weird

More silence, for reasons of above

Everyone: So was that

More silence

Everyone: Ricky Martin is a fruit!!! Wow......

Cid: Okay, enough of that stupid S#$%, lets get down to buissness, barret, please make him stop singing...

Barret: okay(realeases clouds ears.)

Cid: So, we can use cloud if he's listening to that song, I don;t think it's on record because I've never heard it before.

Everyone looks around for noise, find Elton John playing piano in middle of Rocket launch site.

Cloud: Who are you???

Elton: My name is Elton John, I am from a planet called earth, and I have no idea why I am here.

Barret: We need you to come with us, we need you to play that music when we tell you to, this guy goes insane otherwise.

Elton: Welllllll, Oka-

A katana is seen flashing though air, Strike is seen holding it, standing behind him is Criosphrinx, holding a shotgun.

Barret: Hey, I thought you guys were dead!!!

Strike: We have powers....

Crio: Yeah

Cid: Well, why the F$%&*$ hell did you kill him!!!!

Crio: We had our orders...

Tifa: Who sent them!!!

Strike: A man named turtle, Cids Turtle....

Red XIII: Does he have powers too???

Crio: yep, his are very powerful, he sent us to stop him from ruining the story...

Red XIII: can you take us across the ocean???

Strike: No, but he could, but you need to get his permission

Barret: Well then get it!! DAMMIT!!!!!

Later, back at Turtles headquarters....

Strike: Please, your story sucks anyway, lets just end the samn thing!!!!!

Crio: Yeah, Come on!!!!

Turtle: No, I will strech this story out as long as possible, got it...
















Strike: Oh come on!!!

turtle: Guards!!!

Two needles come down and inject both of them...

Strike: mmm, everything looks like cool things, mmmmmm......

Crio: hey, it didn;t work my was full of air, ARRRGGGGGG!!!!!!

Collapses to ground, dead.... again......

Back in Rocket Town...

Cid: They aern't coming back, are they???

Tifa: nope, I bought a bunch of pheniox downs, lets get outta here, okay.

Cid: Waitttt!!!!!! I just remebered, I have a plane!!!!

Tifa: it got stolen, remember!!!!

Cid: No, another, I call it the little white fluffy bunny!!!!!

Everyone walks into cids backyard, a white version of the little bronco is there. Complete with painted Rabits on it.

Cid: I have a thing for white rabbits....

Minutes later, everyone cramms in and flies off......

Later

Yuffie: and for our in flight entertainment, Riverdance!!!(begins doing riverdance on tip of plane)

Barret: BOOOO!!!! You SUCK!!!!(throws large pinapple at her)

Yuffie: AHHHHH!!!!!!!!(falls though propeller, somehow lands on plane injust two peices, top half falls of.

Tifa: let's just use a pheniox down...(uses one, the legs start licking around, and sit down)

Barret: Ahhhhh!!!!!! Wher the hell is the body!!!!!!

Tifa: meh, close enough....

This chapter sucked, didn't it???? I just wanted to write this one, I may go over to another fic or somehting, but I like chapters 1 and 5 the best, what do you think, send your opinions to tardytheturtle1@yahoo.com also, Strike and Criosphinx are authors on this site, so that's why they have powers. Uhhh, that's it I guess, crappy chapter, crappy stroy ,see you round!!!!

~MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, NOW YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!