Discliamer: I have nothin to do with squaresoft or anything like that, even if they changed their name to softsquare or rabid squirral squad. I also have nothing to do with anything actually, except sit in this dark, damp room all day and write these stories at gunpoint. Also, If Criosphinx is to read this story, I did not mean to offend you in any way,shape or form(I have killed him twice so far), please do not put me in your story just to kill me many times, I won't kill you again(maybe I'll kill strike, or falmingfireballkirby) Anyway, this S^%$ sucks and I only know a few people who read it nayway, sooooooo..... yeaaaahhhhhhh, I'm willing to take suggestions for future chapters.
Turtle: Let's see here.... where I left the people, they were just getting on a plane bound for the city of the ancients, let's me see, should I do something to them, yes, maybe I should, he he he he......
Cloud's Insanity, Chapter 7: Attack of the authors....
The Small, short distence hopping plane continues to fly toward the forest where they first found their way into the city, this time, to save just one person, not the whole damn world!!!(waitttt, mayyybeeee they are, he he he.... MWA HA HA HA!!!!)
Cloud: My brain feels funny(he points to his foot) And I have to throw up(he points to his other foot) BLEEEAHHHH!!!!(throws up over side of ship)
Tifa: You, know, it's kind of weird, you know, someone is controling what happens to us, none of this would have happened if it that phycopathic dumbass hadn't done that, I would hav-
ZAP!!!!!
Lighting hits Tifa, she collapses in a fizzled heap on the ground.
Tifa: help....... me.......
Barret: one sec.
BAM!!!! shoots her in the face
Cid: What the F$%^ id you do that for!!!
Barret: I can use a pheniox down on her, see(uses pheniox down)
Tifa: Oh, thanks a lot!!! You could have just used a X-position or an elixer, you didn't have to take the fast, cheap way out, like all americans do!!! Waaaitttt, what is an american, AHHH!!!! Turtle is controling me!!!!
meanwhile....
Turtle: Hah ha, yes, thats it, now throw yourself off the plane, after beating up barret becasue you think he took your shirt off while you were asleep last night!!!! MWA HA HA HA HA!!!!
Man: Sir, theres a Strike and a Criosphinx here to see you.
Turtle: Let them in.
Strike:(rushes up to Turtle and holds his Katana up to his neck) Move and you die
Crio runs up to him and puts shotgun to the side of his forehead
Crio: We're the new bosses around here, got it
Turtle: There are at least 7 ways I can think of to kill both of you right now, and Crio, why are you alive, I thought I killed you in the real world, you can't reveive from that!!
Strike: Simple, I took him to the FF7 world and used a pheniox down on him Dumbass!!!
Turtle: I have a meeting, so if you'll excuse me, He will come in here any minute now...
Crio: Oh yeah, who he he!!(cocks gun)
Turtle: His name is FlamingFireballKirby
Strike: Huh???
Crio: It's Flaming Fireball Kirby in one word!!! I would think you would have gotten that...
Strike: I guess those druggs are still wearing off, hey pie!!!!
Strike pounts to a portreit of a peice of Cow S#$%(this proves just how insane I am)
Crio: No, thats not Pie!!!(hits him in stomach with butt of gun)
Strike: Hu-
Then, door bursts open, a man is seen standing there...
Turtle: Ahhhh, FlamingFireballKirby, nice to see you
Crio: Hey, get out of here, we're doing something!!!
Fireball: I have buissness with him, you should leave...
Strike: Hell no!!!
Fireball: Fine then.(holds up hnad and flicks it to the right, they both fly across the room to the right, they both land on their backs)
Strike: OW, my eye!!!!(holds eye, gets up, and rushes out of the room)
Strike:(in distence) Wheres the bathroom, somethings oozing out of my eye!!!!
Crio: OW, my- wait, nothing hurts.. I'd better go help Strike!!!(rushes out of room to go help him)
Fireball: Why didn't you take them, I know you could, unlessss....
Turtle: My powers are not fading, I wanted to see what you could do, now, you know what you must do, I will send you to the world, then, you then must do your job, and do it well, or I will not pay you at all!!!!
Fireball: I understand....
Back to the main characters!!!!
Barret: Dmanit!!! Yuffie's Legs are trying to get out of her restraints again!!!!
Cid: One sec,(Picks her up and throws her off the ship) Damn ,that felt good, now to relax(apparently doing some plug) And nothing relaxs you better, or suffacates you more than Camel Super duper extra super tar. It's so damn thick ,its like smoking 800 cigerettes at once, Lung cancer, here I come!!!!
That fast voice in commercials: Some side effects include, Cancer , Diabetes, Aids, Insatnt death, Stroke, or heart attacks, this happens in 99% of all users.
Tifa, Red XIII: ?????
Cid: Huh, I don't remember anything I said in the last 30 seconds...
Barret: Yeah, well, look, theres land!!!! it must be that continent which has no name!!!
Everyone murmurs in agreement
Tifa: Let us try to land the plane!!!
Barret: That's kinda obvious Tifa....
Tifa: AHHHH SHUTT UP!!!!!(puches Barret in balls, casuing them to be crushed as he falls to the ground moaning weakly)
Tifa: I could kill you, and use a pheniox down on ya, then you'd get 'em back!!
Barret: n....e....v...e....r....mind
Red XIII: Who's that??
Fireball is seen floating in midair
Barret:(holds up megaphone) Who are you???
Fireball: I have ben sent to prolong your journey, now back to rocket town with all of you!!!!(holds up hand and a fireball begins to appear in his hand) This fireball will slowly push the plane back to rocket town, no matter how hard you try to fight it, I made it slow to prolong the process even longer!!! Now, be prolonged!!!(shoots fireball)
Everyone: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!(somehow, no one makes a move for the controls)
Strike: NOOOOO!!!!!!(jumps in front of fireball, casuing him to be set on fire) IT BUURRRRNNNNSSSS!!!!!
Crio:(dashs in) try this(uses some potion on him)
Strike: Thanks.
Crio stares at him, never blinking, he nodds
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio: OKAY!!!!!!(pulls out shotgun and turns to Fireball, he charges him) DIIIIEEEE!!!!!!
Strike turns to face Everyone
Strike: We are on your side, do not kill us. We are in this story trying to stop Turtle and Fireball from prolonging this story as long as possible becasue, frankly, we think this story sucks!!!(turns around to see Fireballholding him by the hair with one hand, and punching him in the face with the other) He's doing fine... Anyway, we also think you are being mistreated, and you are treated much better in his story, so we would like you to come with us, I mean, he doesn't control you there, he just uses his powers to make Tifas shirt dissapear, oh.... wait..... GOD DAMN IT!!!! Anyway, we're the good guys here and with your help, we can beat these guys(looks back to crio, he is nowbeing swung around in circles very quickly, he drops his shotgun)
Crio: AHHHHHHHhhhhhhAHHHHHHHhhhhhAHHHHHHHhhhhAHHHHHH!!!!
Fireball stops and lets him go
Crio: woahhh, I'm really dizzy right nooowwww....
Strike:(holds his Katana aloft) CHARGE!!!!!!
Strike charges into the fray
Fireball holds up hand and fires a force of powerful wind, it rips the wings off the little white fluffy rabbit(cids new plane) and tosses Strike and Criosphinx down towards the ground
Fireball: Humph, easy enough, three birds with one scone, I mean, stone, DAMN IT!! Back to turtle no, I suppose....
Tifa: AHHH we're gonna crash!!!!!
Everyone else screams except for cloud
Cloud: My mom tells me not to set flower shops on fire anymore.
Meanwhile, closer to the surface....
Strike: OOWWWW!!!!! My other eye!!!!
Crio: Where the hells my shotgun??!!!
BLAM!!! Red XIII falls limply off the plane
While all this is happening, Sephiroth flies over on his magic Jalepano
Sephiroth: Pitiful fools, well, eat this posioned food!!!! It will either land on you, or you will eat it and die!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Now, to set flame to Aeris's body after covering it with miracle grow!!!! MWA HA HA HA!!!
Authors note: I wonder if that would really work???
What will happen to our heroes?? Will the story be stopped by Strike and Crio(actual authors on this site) Or will it be kept going forever and ever by Turtle and fireball(also authors) Or will Sephiroth's new cooking finally get them?? Find out next time!!!!
P.S I can fit many authors into my story at this point on one of two sides, the Stop the story side or the Turtle side, if you wish to get in this story, e-mail me at tardytheturtle1@yahoo.com and tell me which side you wish to be on, and a little about yourself, also, how you wish to be armed(realistic) Or just tell me all of this in a review.
Later
~Cids Turtle
Turtle: Let's see here.... where I left the people, they were just getting on a plane bound for the city of the ancients, let's me see, should I do something to them, yes, maybe I should, he he he he......
Cloud's Insanity, Chapter 7: Attack of the authors....
The Small, short distence hopping plane continues to fly toward the forest where they first found their way into the city, this time, to save just one person, not the whole damn world!!!(waitttt, mayyybeeee they are, he he he.... MWA HA HA HA!!!!)
Cloud: My brain feels funny(he points to his foot) And I have to throw up(he points to his other foot) BLEEEAHHHH!!!!(throws up over side of ship)
Tifa: You, know, it's kind of weird, you know, someone is controling what happens to us, none of this would have happened if it that phycopathic dumbass hadn't done that, I would hav-
ZAP!!!!!
Lighting hits Tifa, she collapses in a fizzled heap on the ground.
Tifa: help....... me.......
Barret: one sec.
BAM!!!! shoots her in the face
Cid: What the F$%^ id you do that for!!!
Barret: I can use a pheniox down on her, see(uses pheniox down)
Tifa: Oh, thanks a lot!!! You could have just used a X-position or an elixer, you didn't have to take the fast, cheap way out, like all americans do!!! Waaaitttt, what is an american, AHHH!!!! Turtle is controling me!!!!
meanwhile....
Turtle: Hah ha, yes, thats it, now throw yourself off the plane, after beating up barret becasue you think he took your shirt off while you were asleep last night!!!! MWA HA HA HA HA!!!!
Man: Sir, theres a Strike and a Criosphinx here to see you.
Turtle: Let them in.
Strike:(rushes up to Turtle and holds his Katana up to his neck) Move and you die
Crio runs up to him and puts shotgun to the side of his forehead
Crio: We're the new bosses around here, got it
Turtle: There are at least 7 ways I can think of to kill both of you right now, and Crio, why are you alive, I thought I killed you in the real world, you can't reveive from that!!
Strike: Simple, I took him to the FF7 world and used a pheniox down on him Dumbass!!!
Turtle: I have a meeting, so if you'll excuse me, He will come in here any minute now...
Crio: Oh yeah, who he he!!(cocks gun)
Turtle: His name is FlamingFireballKirby
Strike: Huh???
Crio: It's Flaming Fireball Kirby in one word!!! I would think you would have gotten that...
Strike: I guess those druggs are still wearing off, hey pie!!!!
Strike pounts to a portreit of a peice of Cow S#$%(this proves just how insane I am)
Crio: No, thats not Pie!!!(hits him in stomach with butt of gun)
Strike: Hu-
Then, door bursts open, a man is seen standing there...
Turtle: Ahhhh, FlamingFireballKirby, nice to see you
Crio: Hey, get out of here, we're doing something!!!
Fireball: I have buissness with him, you should leave...
Strike: Hell no!!!
Fireball: Fine then.(holds up hnad and flicks it to the right, they both fly across the room to the right, they both land on their backs)
Strike: OW, my eye!!!!(holds eye, gets up, and rushes out of the room)
Strike:(in distence) Wheres the bathroom, somethings oozing out of my eye!!!!
Crio: OW, my- wait, nothing hurts.. I'd better go help Strike!!!(rushes out of room to go help him)
Fireball: Why didn't you take them, I know you could, unlessss....
Turtle: My powers are not fading, I wanted to see what you could do, now, you know what you must do, I will send you to the world, then, you then must do your job, and do it well, or I will not pay you at all!!!!
Fireball: I understand....
Back to the main characters!!!!
Barret: Dmanit!!! Yuffie's Legs are trying to get out of her restraints again!!!!
Cid: One sec,(Picks her up and throws her off the ship) Damn ,that felt good, now to relax(apparently doing some plug) And nothing relaxs you better, or suffacates you more than Camel Super duper extra super tar. It's so damn thick ,its like smoking 800 cigerettes at once, Lung cancer, here I come!!!!
That fast voice in commercials: Some side effects include, Cancer , Diabetes, Aids, Insatnt death, Stroke, or heart attacks, this happens in 99% of all users.
Tifa, Red XIII: ?????
Cid: Huh, I don't remember anything I said in the last 30 seconds...
Barret: Yeah, well, look, theres land!!!! it must be that continent which has no name!!!
Everyone murmurs in agreement
Tifa: Let us try to land the plane!!!
Barret: That's kinda obvious Tifa....
Tifa: AHHHH SHUTT UP!!!!!(puches Barret in balls, casuing them to be crushed as he falls to the ground moaning weakly)
Tifa: I could kill you, and use a pheniox down on ya, then you'd get 'em back!!
Barret: n....e....v...e....r....mind
Red XIII: Who's that??
Fireball is seen floating in midair
Barret:(holds up megaphone) Who are you???
Fireball: I have ben sent to prolong your journey, now back to rocket town with all of you!!!!(holds up hand and a fireball begins to appear in his hand) This fireball will slowly push the plane back to rocket town, no matter how hard you try to fight it, I made it slow to prolong the process even longer!!! Now, be prolonged!!!(shoots fireball)
Everyone: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!(somehow, no one makes a move for the controls)
Strike: NOOOOO!!!!!!(jumps in front of fireball, casuing him to be set on fire) IT BUURRRRNNNNSSSS!!!!!
Crio:(dashs in) try this(uses some potion on him)
Strike: Thanks.
Crio stares at him, never blinking, he nodds
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio:(nod)
Strike:(nod)
Crio: OKAY!!!!!!(pulls out shotgun and turns to Fireball, he charges him) DIIIIEEEE!!!!!!
Strike turns to face Everyone
Strike: We are on your side, do not kill us. We are in this story trying to stop Turtle and Fireball from prolonging this story as long as possible becasue, frankly, we think this story sucks!!!(turns around to see Fireballholding him by the hair with one hand, and punching him in the face with the other) He's doing fine... Anyway, we also think you are being mistreated, and you are treated much better in his story, so we would like you to come with us, I mean, he doesn't control you there, he just uses his powers to make Tifas shirt dissapear, oh.... wait..... GOD DAMN IT!!!! Anyway, we're the good guys here and with your help, we can beat these guys(looks back to crio, he is nowbeing swung around in circles very quickly, he drops his shotgun)
Crio: AHHHHHHHhhhhhhAHHHHHHHhhhhhAHHHHHHHhhhhAHHHHHH!!!!
Fireball stops and lets him go
Crio: woahhh, I'm really dizzy right nooowwww....
Strike:(holds his Katana aloft) CHARGE!!!!!!
Strike charges into the fray
Fireball holds up hand and fires a force of powerful wind, it rips the wings off the little white fluffy rabbit(cids new plane) and tosses Strike and Criosphinx down towards the ground
Fireball: Humph, easy enough, three birds with one scone, I mean, stone, DAMN IT!! Back to turtle no, I suppose....
Tifa: AHHH we're gonna crash!!!!!
Everyone else screams except for cloud
Cloud: My mom tells me not to set flower shops on fire anymore.
Meanwhile, closer to the surface....
Strike: OOWWWW!!!!! My other eye!!!!
Crio: Where the hells my shotgun??!!!
BLAM!!! Red XIII falls limply off the plane
While all this is happening, Sephiroth flies over on his magic Jalepano
Sephiroth: Pitiful fools, well, eat this posioned food!!!! It will either land on you, or you will eat it and die!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! Now, to set flame to Aeris's body after covering it with miracle grow!!!! MWA HA HA HA!!!
Authors note: I wonder if that would really work???
What will happen to our heroes?? Will the story be stopped by Strike and Crio(actual authors on this site) Or will it be kept going forever and ever by Turtle and fireball(also authors) Or will Sephiroth's new cooking finally get them?? Find out next time!!!!
P.S I can fit many authors into my story at this point on one of two sides, the Stop the story side or the Turtle side, if you wish to get in this story, e-mail me at tardytheturtle1@yahoo.com and tell me which side you wish to be on, and a little about yourself, also, how you wish to be armed(realistic) Or just tell me all of this in a review.
Later
~Cids Turtle
