Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter. I also do not own the opening line "It was a dark and stormy night" whoever that lucky a-hole was, is rich right now. I am not. So please, do not confuse the two of us.
Rated PG: Scary rain and lightning
AN: Okay folks, this author's note is gonna be a long one, so if you don't want to read the whole thing, I understand. However, you might just want to check it out. Who knows, something here may be of interest to you!
First and foremost I would like to say that my next chapter will be out on Valentine's Day. That's right, I'm getting off my lazy butt and writing a chapter for you, in a week! Do you think I can do it? There will be (maybe) no matches next time, but everybody will be opening Valentines. If you would like to send a Valentine to a member of the story, please leave one in your review. It can be store bought, hand made, a box of chocolates, or a thoughtful poem. Whatever you choose it to be, send it in!
Next, I would like to wish a happy and belated birthday to Orlando Bloom and Elijah Wood! Orli turned twenty-six on the 13th, and Frolijah turned twenty-two on the 28th. We love you guys!
For those of you who are interested, I am starting an update list. If you would like to be notified of when I update this story, please tell me in your review and leave your e-mail for me. Thanks to Lady Artemisan for the idea. ^_^
Sugar Quill – Your sister is obsessed with Orlando Bloom? Compliment her on her wonderful taste. It just so happens that I am a fan of both Orli and Legolas, as are my crazed friends. (If you want to talk to obsessed, talk to them.)
Daydreamer – Hey! Hands off! Frodo is MINE!! That's right, the authoress of this story is a Frolijah fangirl. You may run for cover now.
Okay, I know this probably will not interest you people, but it entertained me, and it entertained KK (my editor) and that crazy reviewer known as Mrs. Greenleaf. Yes, I am friends with them. If you haven't run for cover, please do so now. ^_^ Anyway, I had a dream about Frolijah (for all you people who are confused Frolijah is a term to encompass both Frodo and Elijah, hence, Frolijah. Get it?) and well, it was fun as heck. I wrote it down, and decided to put it up here in my author's notes! Don't you just feel special! If some of the stuff sounds weird, don't worry, it's either because of the dream, or because I couldn't resist sticking an inside joke or two in there. Enjoy!
It all started on a Sunday night. I had to go to Nicki's house for one reason or another and my entire family decided to accompany me. My brothers came because of a conversation we had about a foreign exchange student, or something like that, I'm not really sure. Anyway, we showed up and Jessica answered the door. She informed us that her deck had caught on fire, but when we went outside to look, it was just a little burnt corner. Out of the blue, Elijah Wood showed up and told us that he would teach us games and tricks. We agreed and went back to our house. Standing on the driveway, he taught us various things such as how to make sounds with our hands and yo yo tricks. At one point I managed to do a cool behind the back trick but it ended up getting wrapped around my leg. After teaching us everything he could we went back into the family room and he sat down on the couch. I was just standing there when he started talking to me. He was asking me questions about stuff. Benjamin and Ethan jumped at the chance to start teasing us. Pushing aside KK's Lord of the Rings board game, I sat down next to him, and we continued talking. Gradually, the distance between us began to close, and in a bold move I shifted over and settled down on his left knee. (Am I smooth or what? ^_~) Not that he minded or anything.
We sat there for a little bit before he pointed at the floor and asked me what I had been doing. Following his finger I told him that I had been working on a puzzle. He had me get off his knee and sit on the armrest, but we were still in very close proximity to each other. Then, picking up a violin he started to play a beautiful melody. When he was finished, Frolijah turned and stared into my eyes. As the two of us leaned in, his eyes shown like beacons of light (my editor's decision, don't ask). My heart pounded wildly, and I was sure that my face was bright red. Hardly a centimeter from the other's face he grinned suddenly and stuck out his tongue slightly. Not in a mean or nasty way, mind you, it was just something silly and done with a giggle. I took it as a sign of nervousness.
Unfortunately the two of us didn't get close to kissing again, and instead decided to watch 'The Faculty'. Looking at the clock I realized with a start that it was four-fifteen in the morning. Elijah decided that he didn't want to sit and stretched out, positioning his head on m lap. He joked about me violating him when one of my hands rested on his chest. The two of us started laughing and then…my son of monkey's uncle alarm woke me up. Monday morning.
Is that not the craziest dream ever! *looks around and notices that her audience has fallen asleep* Oh…hehe…well I guess we should get on with the story then! I now announce…chapter ten of Harry Potter vs. Lord of the Rings!
Chapter Ten (accompanied by a Dutch clog dancer)
With Christmas over, things in Lothlorien began to return to normal. Decorations were taken down and packed away for the next year, Fred and George ate the remaining candy canes, Galadriel enchanted her gingerbread houses so that they would remain perfect forever, and the elves stopped having drunken parties every night. In fact, the twins of terror were banned from having parties, especially after the New Years incident. The nights were spent discussing the two worlds, which Galadriel and Hermione seemed rather keen on, while everybody else just sort of sat around. Fred and George had a fun time stealing Gollum's rubber ball for about a week before he nearly bit George's finger off trying to get it back. They resorted to playing tricks on any poor, hapless elf that happened to wander by.
Their new favorite target turned out to be Legolas, seeing as he was around quite often, and was usually deeply involved in something else. A few times he had managed to find out what they had been up to and managed to escape unscathed. However, being the devious little fellows they were, Legolas had lived with green, pink, red, purple, and orange hair before he could track Hermione down and ask her to fix it.
One particular night, Legolas, Aragorn, Boromir, and Gimli were all out on a quest or exploration of some kind, which left everybody else with nothing to do. Hermione was curled up on the couch reading a book on botany that Sam had lent her, and he was reading something on Herbology. Harry and Frodo were sitting the corner, having another pity party. They had ended up inviting Ron, because he was Harry's best friend, and he had nothing better to do. The twins were murmuring to each other, trying to come up with something to do, while Galadriel and Arwen discussed Elven affairs. Gollum was nowhere to be found, but according to Frodo he had seen him just before the sun set with his blue ball and hissing "my precioussss…"
The sun had gone down quite some time before, and Arwen began fretting about Aragorn. "It's so dark out, and they've been gone all day. You don't think something's happened to them, do you?" she asked her grandmother.
Lady Gaddy shook her head, "No. The scouts would have reported it by now if anything had happened." She wasn't so sure herself though; the sky was darkening outside, and flashes of lightning, well…flashed. It appeared as if a thunderstorm could break loose any minute and not the good kind of rain. The kind of rain that started out books with "It was a dark and stormy night" stuff.
Suddenly a huge gust of wind blew the tree house door open, putting out all the candles and plunging the room into utter darkness. Somewhere in the blackness Hermione called out, "Lumos!" and a pale light emanated from her wand. The group sat there in silence for a moment before Ron and Harry pulled out their own wands. Fred and George were heading for the door, and Galadriel had just lit the first candle when Aragorn burst in the room accompanied by a rather large flash of lightening and a rumbling clap of thunder.
"Alas!" he cried in the flickering candle and wand light, "We must mourn this night, for Boromir, my companion, and son of the steward of Gondor has fallen!"
"Is that all?" Fred asked, using his wand to light the other candles in the room.
"Is that all?" Aragorn repeated incredulously.
"Is there an echo in this room?" George asked.
"Is there a reason you're all asking questions?"
"I don't know, is there?"
Aragorn stood there in silence for a minute, as the candles were lighted again, and warmth returned to the small room. "Alas!" he cried again, "Will not one of you share in my grief!" Arwen looked about ready to reply when somebody else entered the room, Boromir's arm held tightly around his shoulders.
"He's not dead you stupid git, just hurt badly. You'd think a great king like you could tell the difference between dead and able to walk," the figure growled.
A stifled silence filled the room. Then, "Why are there two of you?" Arwen asked.
Aragorn turned and looked at the man next to him. "Imposter!" he shouted, "throw off your disguise! I am the Aragorn son of Arathorn, the true king of Gondor!"
"Nice to meet you," the Aragorn clone grunted, "are any of you going to help me with this guy?" He nudged Boromir in the side, who groaned and straightened himself up.
"I thank you, but I can walk of my own accord," he nodded, took a step forward, and promptly fell on his face.
Aragorn opened his mouth.
"Don't you even THINK of saying alas!" the Aragorn imposter snarled, helping the fallen future steward guy back to his feet.
"This guy can't be me!" Aragorn pouted, "He's much to mean! And besides, he doesn't have the same rugged good looks!"
Hermione rubbed her chin, "I don't know, you both look pretty similar to me. Tall, thin, long greasy hair, somewhat of a beard, tattered clothes. You look like you could be twins separated at birth or something." Galadriel lit the last candle, which somehow brightened the room about a thousand times.
Ron gaped, "Sirius?"
Everybody immediately turned to Harry for conformation, knowing that the bespectacled boy should recognize Sirius Black better than anybody else. Harry scrutinized that new stranger, while trying to blink stars out of his eyes. "Uh…I don't think that's him," he said finally.
"What! Look! That's Sirius!"
The newly dubbed Sirius was about to say something, when Hermione interrupted. "Ron, look at this logically. Sirius would have had to find some way to Hogwarts without getting caught, then he would have had to find his way to the kitchens, and without the assistance of house elves found the rip in the air. It just doesn't seem to fit together."
"Argh!" Ron slapped his forehead. "Don't you see! Sirius went to Hogwarts to tell Harry something, but it's only logical that he would be hungry upon arriving! And being one of the Marauders, he knew where the kitchen was, and that the house elves would give him anything he wanted! However, with the lack of friendly elves, he probably began to suspect something, and instead of going and fetching the headmaster - who has been here in case you forgot – lest the problem worsen, he decided to investigate the strange shimmering portal in the air! Now tell me, how does this seem unbelievable!"
"It sounds more outrageous to me than one of Professor Trewlaney's predictions," Hermione sniffed.
"Excuse me?" the stranger raised his hand, "I would like to say that you should all listen to Ron. He seems to be the only one with his wits at the moment. Now somebody help me with Boromir, I'm Sirius!" (Hehe…doncha just love the puns?)
"Scoundrel! Liar! Identity stealer!" Aragorn yelled, unsheathing his sword, "Coward! Maker of bad puns! Ruiner of my mourning of Boromir…or something!"
The supposed Sirius drew a wand from his robes. "You really are crazy," he said.
Match #8: Sirius Black vs. Aragorn
Announcer #2: Hello all you beautiful people! *grins, while Announcer #1 attempts to escape the corner into which she has been tied* Welcome to our newest match! In corner number one we have Sirius Black from Harry Potter's world. He looks the same, weighs about the same, and is a little bit taller than Aragorn! Isn't that crazy!
And in corner number two, we have the future king of Gondor! He relates to Sirius in all those crazy ways that I just mention! Let's get on with the match, shall we? Please, try not to induce any fatal wounds, we don't need another character with a chronic dying problem. Let the match BEGIN!
"How dare you call me crazy!" Calling out a war cry that resembled a wounded duck, Aragorn leapt forward and tackled "Sirius". The two wrestled around for a bit, and Boromir desperately tried to crawl away with what little strength he had.
"So…much…grease…" he moaned. In a rather bold move, the twins darted forward, grabbed Boromir's arms and pulled him away from the shouting, sweating, and frankly, disgusting fight that was going on.
"Where does it hurt, mate?" Fred asked.
Boromir winced and pointed to his side. Fred touched his wand to the spot and muttered a few words. "Hey…that feels all lot better. What sort of new devilry is this?"
"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" Fred inquired of his twin.
George shrugged, "Who knows. Why don't we knock him out?"
"Sounds good to me," Fred agreed.
But back to the fight…the man who claimed he was Sirius had managed to pin Aragorn on the floor. "Will you just listen to me! I am not, I repeat, I AM NOT TRYING TO STEAL ANYBODY'S IDENTITY!" As if on a cue, a huge bolt of lightning struck the ground next to the tree house, effectively putting out all the lights again. This time, all the candles flickered back to life after a few seconds. "I'll have to teach you that spell later," the man said to Hermione.
Harry blinked at the onrush of light and gasped… "Sirius!?"
"Splendid that you were able to make it old chap!" George called out from across the room.
"Yes! Absolutely smashing!" Fred added.
"Well then, Sirius, what do you know…" Hermione muttered to herself.
Harry ran over to hug his godfather, while Ron searched for a sharp object to do himself in with. "You actually came!" Harry exclaimed. Ron settled for beating his head against the wall.
"You thought I wouldn't worry when I hear no word from you for over a month?"
"Oh Sirius, I'm sorry!" Harry hugged his godfather more tightly. From across the room, Frodo's huge Hobbity eyes were even huger than normal and he sniffled. It wasn't fair that the only other parentless person now had a substitute father. Why didn't anybody love him?
Almost as if he were reading the Hobbit's mind, Sirius nodded towards Frodo. "Who's that? Doesn't look like a very happy little fellow."
"That's Frodo, he's my new best friend here. I guess he's not very happy because now I kind of have a dad and well…he doesn't."
"We can't let that happen, now can we?" Then, Sirius did something very out of character that made Harry feel like he might faint. Standing up, his godfather crossed the room and crushed the poor little Hobbit in a tight hug. "How would you like to have an honorary father, Frodo?"
Frodo's eyes filled with big Hobbity tears, "You…you really mean it?"
"Of course I do! I mean everything I say!"
"Aww…" Hermione cooed.
Ron lay on the floor, twitching, "Please…I beg you, kill me." However Boromir did not listen to Ron, because Boromir was dead. Again.
~~~~~~~~~
This chapter is dedicated to my dog MoMo who we had to put to sleep on the morning of January 31st, 2003. We'll never forget you Mo!
There you are! Don't forget to send Valentines, add yourself to the update list, or comment on a match you would really like to see! Also, I will eventually leave notes to all of you who have taken the time to review my story, but I thought that would make my note at the beginning longer than the chapter. Until next time…
