And now ladies and gentlemen here's the eagerly awaited part four!!!! Next up: The Immortals.
Disclaimer: we own none of this… except the Kodak corporation.
Yes, we own that.

Once upon a time there was a sole lady knight of tortall. She had a quest and a purpose, thus validating her existence.

And Alanna was like "yay, I'm special."

And Francis was like "So am I."

And then Ralon said "my mommie says I'm special."

And then Alanna was like "Shut up, Malven!"

So Alanna and Corum road to and inn where Alanna had a bath so that she would cease to resemble Aragorn and then she went to the common room where she met Liam, but she didn't know he was Liam and he was all like "Hello, I have pectoral muscles which are larger than my head."

And Corum stopped drinking long enough to say "Now that's a man you should be interested in. you'll have beautiful children with large pectoral muscles."

And Alanna was like "Wow...I feel the need to endager my life."

So she did, and Liam showed up and killed millions of people single-handedly like in those crappy martial arts movies.

Then Alanna swooned. "Wow, you beat up all of those men single-handedly."

And he was like "Of course I did, I am the shang dragon!"

And Alanna was like "Really?!" and she began to lick his shoes.

And Liam was like "well, this is a little kinky, but, while you're at it, go a little to the left."

Then Alanna and Liam got a room and Corum was happy. And drunk. And stuff. Narg.

Then Alanna convinced Liam (who had the approximate iq of a muscley potato) to be her boy toy/body guard when she went skipping off to obtain a legendary hunk of rock.

And then Jon was like "Awww, I wanna be a boy toy."

And Ralon was like "You can be my boy toy."

And then Jon was like "Eeeeek, a threat to my maidenhood!" And he threw acid on Ralon, leaving him horribly scared and deformed.

Alanna blinked and was like "That was… interesting. Liam, let's screw!"

And Liam was like "Agh! Sorcery! Gods forbid people find an easier way of doing things. If people start to depend on subtlety and magic there will cease to be a need for my brute strength. And sheince I have more of less the iq of a potato I'm essentially screwed."
And Alanna was like "What? I'm sorry, I wasn't listening. Liam, do you think communication is a problem in our relationship?"

And Liam was like "yes, let's screw."

And Alanna was like "That doesn't solve everything, you know."

And Liam was like "It doesn't?"

And Raoul was like "Duh."

And Alanna was like "Never mind, let's just screw."

And then Thayet and her companions came along and were all like "tra la la, we're starving to death in a country ravaged by war. Since I'm hot you must do my bidding."

And Liam was like "Uh, ok!"

And Alanna was all like "wow, she's bossy, she'll be perfect for Jon."

So they went off to the roof of the world where Alanna disobeyed Liam and eagerly climbed a mountain to greet certain doom with open arms.

"Doom" happened to be a reject extra from the Planet of the Apes movie and he lived in a cave developing severe anti-social tendancies.

And Alanna was all like "Agh! Big foot! Can I take your picture and sell it to the tabloids?"

And Doom (who was also chitral) was like "Dude, photography hasn't been invented yet."

And the backround voice was like "this moment was brought to you by Kodack."

And alanna grabbed the dominion jewel and was like "Keep away!" and went back down the mountain and nearly died in the process.

And Liam was like "Arg! You broke your promise!"

And Alanna was like "Oh well, I'm marrying George anyway."

And Liam was like "Noooo!!!! All I wanted was for you to become someone you weren't. is that too much to ask?"

And faithful was like "yes."

And Liam was like "ahhhh! It's satan!!!!"

And the mother goddess was like "I thought we've been through this…"

And then a bunch of stuff happened and some dude came back to life and got killed again and some other dude died as a result.

And Roger was al like "Arg! Even Francis had a bigger part than me!"

And then Alanna married George and lived happily ever after, the end.
Ps- a bunch of stuff happened in the lower city which resulted in Ralons death. The end.
And now for some shameless self promotion!!!! Make sure you check out work by the co-author, screen name is Assthorn

Mikki: YAY!!!!!! We Finished SOTL!!!!! ( And it only took us a few months....**must be all the hours we spend on extensivley proof reading our works**) *runs around naked throwing flowers in the air* YAY!!! We're done!!!

Dango( a.k.a. Assthorn): Uum... won't Briar be slightly displeased that you murdered thousands of ioccent flowers just so you could throw them in celebration...

Mikki: **GASPS IN HORROR*** OH NO! She's right!! ( *begins kissing grass*) BRIAR! MY LOVE! FORGIVE ME!!!!!!!!!

Dango: **shuffles off** Right...Ok....

**********************************PLEASE REVIEW!!...WE'LL LOVE YOU!**************************

Mikki: Wow. I'm a poet...and I didn't even know it!

Dango: So am I. And I didn't try.