Okay, I know you guys aren't aware of this, since I wasn't posting chapters as soon as they were done, but instead posted a new one every week…but I haven't written a new chapter of this in like a few months…it's really sad.  I got distracted and then…yeah.  Okay, so now I'm buckling down and concentrating like I should to write this new chapter about…seventeen hours before I intend to post.  Okay, that's plenty of time, right?  Right?

*****

Take My Hand

Part 7

*****

Life can be pretty sadistic sometimes.  It seems as though it loves nothing more than to put you off balance and keep you in a constant state of bewildered shock.  One of the tricks it especially seems to enjoy is to lull you into complacency before striking full force.  By this, I mean that you will be handed a problem that, though it seems difficult at first glance, is easily solved, causing you to feel as though you can handle any problem.  Of course, that's when life throws you a curve ball.  Or five.  I suppose it just depends on how "lucky" you are.

Yes, just when you are finally comfortable and secure, you encounter several new complicated problems that are made even more difficult by the fact that even though you thought you had solved that easy problem, only half of it was taken care of, so you've generally got issues all around.  At this point, your life becomes a jumbled mess of complications that make you want to scream, and it appears as though you may never salvage any of the former peace and order that you cherished so much.  It's like trying to go straight from algebra to multivariable calculus with no help and no hints as to what you should do to deal with this wholly new and unfamiliar situation.  It's frustrating to the point of tears, and you start to think that the whole world is coming down around your ears.

I remember thinking that it would be difficult to grow accustomed to having to share my space with another person, even if that person was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.  I had no idea how complicated the situation might become at that time, and so it seemed rather trying to me as it was.  Little did I know that it wouldn't be long before I was rained upon with a plethora of challenges and demands that were sure to tie my life in a jumble of indistinguishable knots, just as surely as Vash had become an inextricable part of that life.  I guess that was the one thing that comforted me through all the surprises that confronted me in the space of a very painful week.  I knew that no matter what happened, Vash would be by my side, suffering right alongside me.  I wondered at times how he had fastened himself to me so completely, but then the answer hit me, and I felt foolish for ever questioning it.

That's what love does to people, after all.  It brings them together for all the joys and pains that life has to offer.

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I have to say; one of the best parts about being in a serious relationship with someone you live with is waking up next to someone every morning.  It also has the potential to be one of the most distracting things about living with your significant other, but that's beside the point.  As I woke up that morning, I was looking forward to sleeping in, as it was a Saturday, one of my favorite days of the week.  Saturday was when I could sleep in late with Vash and then spend the rest of the day with him, not worrying about staying up too late to wake up on time the next day, as I had nothing of particular necessity to do on Sunday either.

I liked to lie there for the longest time, just watching Vash's face as he slept.  It was rare that I woke up first during the week, but on the weekends, I almost always got to watch his peaceful, childlike expressions as he slept in, catching up on all the sleep he missed during the week in his drive to make sure I had breakfast made for me every morning before I went to work.  It was very sweet that he showed such concern, and it was one of the things he was always doing that seemed like a repeated reassurance of his feelings for me, but I so enjoyed the chances I got to watch him sleep, to memorize his face and all the cute little noises he'd make as he slept.  I would stroke his face sometimes, as though I was trying to commit the feel of every bit of it to memory, so that if one day I lost my sight, I would still be able to feel exactly where his lips were, his long-lashed eyes, the mole below his left eye, the little silver hoop he wore in his left ear, the curve of his jaw, so strong and yet feminine all at once.  I could never decide if Vash would qualify as beautiful or handsome, but I decided that perhaps he rested somewhere between those two classifications.

I loved to feel the different textures of skin that all could be found so close together.  His soft, smooth eyelids, the slight bristle on his cheeks and chin, the smooth brow free from worries in his sleep, and the soft, moist lips.  Of course, all this exploration oftentimes led me to kiss him, as it was a temptation I could scarcely be expected to resist.  Beautiful or not, his lips were so temptingly soft, and though he might claim to have morning breath or some such thing, I could have cared less if his taste was a bit less fresh than usual.  It was Vash, after all, and I loved being close to him, feeling him, tasting him.

On one such morning, I finally decided to scoot in for a kiss, but instead of his lips, I went for his eyelids, and as my lips pressed to each one, I felt his long lashes batting slightly as the contact brought him out of whatever light sleep he'd been resting in.  Liquid aqua eyes of a shade I'd never seen anywhere else greeted me, still groggy with the vestiges of sleep.

"Morning."  I don't know why I whispered, but it seemed the right thing to do in such a private moment.  Forget the fact that no one would be able to hear as long as I didn't scream the greeting at him, it just seemed closer when I was quiet.  Besides, I hated the way my voice sounded first thing in the morning.  "Sleep well?"

"Mmm," the affirmation sounded like a low rumble coming from his chest, where I had propped my head up, and the slight vibration was comforting somehow.  "What time is it?" he grumbled, his voice always lower than usual in the morning.  I smiled adoringly at him, not caring that he always saw me at my dopiest, my least impressive.  I didn't have to impress Vash, I just had to be myself for him, and I knew it.  He'd told me as much more than once, and I think that I knew the truth of that statement before he said the words.  Of course, like most things in our relationship, it always felt so much better to hear Vash say it, rather than having to assume I had interpreted his wishes correctly.

"Still early." I kissed his chin slowly, as though it were a very painstaking procedure.  "Only nine-thirty."

"Hungry?" he asked, his eyes flashing slightly with the warmth that they almost always seemed to contain when the two of us were alone together.

"A little." I admitted, pressing my lips to his raspy, unshaven cheek.  "But not enough to get up yet."

"So then…" Vash's eyes lit with a wickedness that still made me blush.  "What should we do?"

"I don't—" Just then, the phone rang.  I believe that telephone calls should be outlawed during the weekends.  Or at least, they should be limited to certain hours.  I groaned slightly, rolling away from him to reach out for the cordless that was resting on the nightstand.  In the course of my movement, the sheet that had been concealing my chest rather well had come loose, and even though I was still essentially covered, Vash was immediately drawn to the wide span of my back that had suddenly been bared to him.  So there I was, trying to answer the phone politely when all the while, my rather helpful boyfriend was making sure to remind me what I should be doing instead of talking on the phone on a Saturday morning.  "Hello?"

"Who calls this early on a Saturday?" Vash grumbled slightly as he set about kissing every inch of exposed skin, starting at the nape of my neck and working his way across my shoulder blades and down my back.  At least he was distracted, but it was difficult to have a normal phone conversation with that sort of thing going on at the same time.

"Meryl-sempai!" The boisterous, over-enthusiastic voice made me smile, even though I still agreed with Vash on the subject of Saturday morning calls.  "It's me!"

"Good morning, Millie." I hadn't talked to the other woman in some time, but I did make an effort to write her at least once a month.  However, since Vash had returned, I'd been more than a little distracted.  At the sound of her name, Vash paused slightly, but apparently he decided that old acquaintance or not, no one got between him and his right to stay in bed with his lover all Saturday morning.  He continued down toward the small of my back, and I tried to pretend I didn't feel like hanging up and letting him have his way.  "I haven't heard from you in a while."

"Yeah!  I was kind of worried when I didn't get letters from you for a few months, but I figured that you were just busy." Millie spoke cheerfully, and even though it was good to hear her voice, Vash's lips were now working at the spots where the sheets still covered my skin.  Apparently, he'd run out of room on my back, so he was tracing his way back up along my hip.  I was almost positive I knew what his destination would be, and I didn't think my phone conversation skills were that strongly developed.  "Anyway, I was calling for two reasons.  First of all, I'm back in town!  I was going to write before I came back, but it was so sudden that I figured it would be more fun to surprise you anyway."

"Wow, really?" I made it sound as though I was gasping at the announcement, and not at the fact that Vash was busily nudging the sheet off of my barely covered chest with insistent kisses and quick fingers.  "Uh…why are you back in the city?"

"That's the second thing." She informed me, apparently convinced by my great sense of timing.  "See, there's been this big claim issue.  Bernadelli called me back because they need everyone they can get back here at the home office.  Apparently, there was a train crash, because this man was running his own private train on government tracks and usually that wouldn't be bad if he kept the schedule straight, but of course, things didn't work out, and now both sides are furious and we've been called in since the man with the private train is one of our big clients.  You know, the eccentric rich people?  One of those, so we need to…Sempai?"

Damn.  She must have heard that last gasp, even though I'd been sure to cover the receiver with one hand while Vash climbed on top of me, all but pushing me down on my back so he had better access to my flesh.  He was currently hard at work driving me insane with his lips on my throat, occasionally rocking his hips into mine for good measure.  Vash made a very convincing argument.  "Uh…yeah?"

"Is everything okay over there?" she asked, and even though her tone was still as buoyant as ever, there was concern in her voice.

"Oh…yeah." I gulped slightly as Vash moved down to my collarbone, one hand going to my breast.  "I just…stubbed my toe." I lied lamely.  In my defense, it's very hard to think of plausible excuses for that sort of thing when Vash is doing that…thing with his hand.  "So…um…good to hear from you."  I hoped she'd take the hint and wrap things up.

"Oh, yeah, definitely." Millie laughed slightly.  "So, have you had breakfast yet?"

"Um…not really." Vash's mouth was moving steadily downward, and I prayed to whatever gods would listen that Millie'd let me go already.

"Well, I'm right down the street from you right now." Millie seemed pleased at this development.  "Why don't we go out?"

"Um…love to, Millie." I barely bit back a gasp as Vash dipped his tongue into my navel.  "But I have…um…a lot…of stuff…I really need to do."

"Oh!  Please?  I haven't seen you in months!" The hint of pleading told me that she wouldn't get off the phone until I agreed.

"I'm not really…dressed." At least that wasn't a lie.  "How about ten minutes?" At Vash's short noise of disapproval, I amended that.  "Um, make that twenty."

"Okay, sure.  Meet me at the little coffee shop on the corner.  You know the one with the purple cat in the window?" Millie asked.

"Yeah…g-great.  Seeya." I hung up the phone before she could question me further, practically throwing it across the room.  At that moment, my lover decided to take a pause, looking up at me with mischief and amusement in his bright teal eyes.  "Vash, did you have to do that while I was on the phone?"

"How's Millie?" he asked, as though he'd been doing nothing at all to make the phone conversation more difficult.

"Good.  She's back in town." I wrapped my arms around his back and pulled him closer to me.  "I have to meet her in twenty minutes."

"Not much time to waste, then." And with that, Vash's mouth was on mine once more.

I love the weekends.

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"And now his daughter is really upset cause it turns out that her best friend was on the other train." Millie had been going on for nearly half an hour about the case, and I was dreading the work I'd have to face on Monday more and more with every additional detail.  "And she's not dead, but she got really hurt and her fiancé actually lost a finger."

"A finger?" I questioned, trying to appear as though I was paying close attention, instead of listening with half an ear and turning to check the clock almost every five minutes.  It wasn't that I didn't like seeing Millie again, I really did!  But the fact of the matter was that when I left, Vash had still been in bed, and I had this hope that if I returned fast enough, we'd be able to make up for the hurried session that had taken place before I'd showered and dressed and ran out the door, still arriving at the shop five minutes late.  It wasn't that I was some sort of sex fiend or anything, but it was the weekend and we usually stayed in bed until noon on Saturdays.  After all, I was a creature of habit.

"Yeah!  And they tried to reattach it, but of course it was too late and the cut wasn't very clean." Millie prattled on.  Just then, she paused, leaning toward me a bit.  "Sempai?"

"Yes?" I gave her my best I'm Paying Attention look.

"If you need to go, you can.  I'm sure you'll get briefed on all of this Monday morning." She told me, smiling sweetly.  It was strange how Millie did that sometimes.  Just when you thought she couldn't even see you, much less tell what you were thinking or feeling, she said something that proved exactly the opposite was true.  "I just wanted a chance to talk to you before all the craziness that's going to start then."

"Uh…I can stay here a bit more." I blushed, feeling a bit like an idiot for trying to rush my visit with Millie all so I could get back to Vash.  I hadn't seen Millie at all in months, and Vash was by my side almost every moment.  And if I was really concerned with making up for before, Vash would hardly be opposed to doing that sort of thing after he was out of bed.  "I just…it's the weekend, you know?  I don't expect phone calls and I usually don't really go out until later."

"Oh, that's okay."  Millie nodded emphatically.  "So, how has everything been with you?  Still in charge of the world?"  I laughed slightly at the old joke.  Millie always used to say that I was so terribly organized and so completely in control of my life, that it was like I was in charge of the entire world.  And I had been, at least in charge of my world.

"Not as much." I admitted.  I wondered momentarily if Vash wouldn't want me to say anything to Millie about what was going on, but I couldn't think of why that would be the case, so I moved on, a blush staining my cheeks.  "Things have gotten a bit more complicated since then.  I…a few months ago, I met up with Vash again."

"Vash?" Millie's bright eyes sparkled with excitement.  She'd always been the chief supporter of the idea of the two of us getting together.  "Is he living nearby?  Or did he move on?"

"Um…actually, he's living with me." I felt my cheeks suffuse with blood at this statement.  I hadn't really spoken with anyone about my relationship with Vash.  Well…I had told my mother that I was seeing someone, which was obviously a slightly edited version of the truth, but she was my mother after all.  I couldn't respond to her constant badgering about my "life of solitude" with some comment about how I was having lots of meaningful sex with my live-in lover, so she could drop it.  But I also didn't want to let her continue with her comments about how I needed a boyfriend, so I decided to give her a limited amount of information on the situation and let her interpret it on her own.  I knew now that she wouldn't rest until she was allowed to meet Vash, so she herself could approve of him, but that idea didn't seem half as terrifying as the inevitable introduction to my brothers.  Anyway, back to the present situation, Millie's reaction to the idea of Vash and I living together.

"Really?" she squealed, and I winced.  I had forgotten about how loud she could get when she was excited.  "You mean…the two of you…after all that, you're together?" I could see that her eyes were wet, and for a second I almost laughed, telling her not to get so worked up about Vash and I having a relationship finally.  But then I remembered that one of the reasons she'd applied to transfer after finishing the Vash job was the man that we'd met while following Vash around.  Nicholas D. Wolfwood.  If I tried, I could still see the delinquent priest's mischievous smirk, the spark in his dark blue eyes when he looked at my friend.  I'd known then that the two of them had feelings for each other, but after Wolfwood died, I thought Millie might lose it.  Ever since then, she'd placed all her stock in getting Vash and I together, so it was no wonder she was excited now.

"Yeah, we are." I smiled, not bothering to try and suppress the blush that still stained my cheeks.  "For about two months now."

"Wow, that's so great!" Millie lunged at me, hugging me tightly.  I didn't struggle, as it was useless to try and escape a Millie Thompson hug.  It was nice, after learning about some obnoxious claims dispute that would likely have me working on overdrive for a month at least, to have a small bit of happiness.  And having Millie so excited about Vash and I…that was an extra bit of happiness that I clung to.

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"So…I'm going to bed now." Vash was standing in the doorway to our room, where he'd been lingering in an irritating fashion for nearly ten minutes.  He was watching me work, and somehow, the fact that he was watching me and I could feel the disapproval and worry in his gaze just made me that much more irritable.  I'd been working practically nonstop since Millie's return, and it seemed as though for every five forms I filled out and filed properly, ten more appeared in their place.  Of course, the rest of the world wasn't courteous enough to stop whenever Bernadelli was working on a big case, so we were all scrambling to try and sort out the train disaster as well as keep up with the current claims.  It was vaguely reminiscent of that time when Vash was first wreaking havoc, though unintentionally, on every city and town he passed.  The paperwork never ended.  Of course, I hadn't known Vash then, and he definitely hadn't stood there and watched me work my fingers to the bone with that damn look on his face like he wanted to make me stop and just get some rest.

Didn't he understand I didn't have time for rest?  This whole mess…it was such a disaster, I was glad that this sort of thing only happened once in a while, now that Vash was…controlled…or out of commission…whatever you want to say.  At any rate, he was no longer making my job harder in that way, but it wasn't really helpful to have him try to mother me as though by working very hard for a month or so, I was abusing myself and needed to be taken care of.  "All right, I'm going to finish some of this paperwork and then I'll join you."  I managed not to look up at him.  That was a mistake, I'd learned.  Those eyes of his were very persuasive, and I was positive that he knew that and used it to his full advantage.

"How much more?" Vash asked.  I could hear his bare feet padding across the room, and when his smell surrounded me, I knew that he was right behind me, looking over my shoulder.  I hated when he looked over my shoulder while I tried to work.

"Just a little." I answered evasively.

"Like…ten more pages?" He was still watching me as he started the bidding for how much longer I would be up.

"Vash, this form alone is twelve pages long." I explained to him, glancing back at him briefly as I flipped the pages to show him.  "I'll do ten more forms and then I'll come to bed." I compromised.

"How many pages is that going to be?" Vash asked.  I didn't have to look to know that he was chewing on his lip absently the way he did when he became worried about something but didn't want to say it outright.

"I'm not sure.  A lot?" I hazarded a rough guess.  I was more than a little irritated with the way he was still hovering behind me.  "Could you just go to bed?  It's really distracting when you stand right there."

"So…will you be done in an hour?" He asked hopefully.  I had to admit, even though Vash wanted to tear me away from my work by the time he was ready for bed every night, which was usually around eleven or so, he usually ended up letting me have my way and staying up until all hours of the night before catching a few quick winks of sleep and then running off to work.

"Maybe if you'd leave me alone so I could concentrate." I snapped at him.  I didn't mean to get angry with him, as I hated fighting with this gentle man, but the fact of the matter was that with too much stress and too little sleep comes a very short temper.  "Seriously, Vash, I'm the one that puts the food on the table here, so you shouldn't be telling me to work less until you're prepared to eat less."

"I have a job too." Vash reminded me.  I rolled my eyes and tossed the form down on my desk, standing and turning to face him.  Fine, if he wanted to argue, I'd argue with him.  Apparently he didn't care that I didn't like not being able to sleep or spend time with him or take a night off until this whole train crash business was settled anymore than he liked it.  I was the one that was suffering most here, wasn't I?  So what if he didn't get sex all the time for a while, at least he could take a nap if he wanted to.  I think I deserved a little more understanding and patience.

"You work at a little corner restaurant as a busboy!"  I threw the facts at him angrily.  "Do you think we can both live on what you bring home from that?"

"I'm not asking you to quit your job!" Vash's eyes watered slightly, and somehow, that only frustrated me.  Why did he have to start crying whenever there was any sort of conflict?  "I just…think you'll kill yourself if you keep going like this."

"Well thanks for your concern, but I really don't need you following me around like some nagging wet nurse!" I was raising my voice now, I knew it, and somehow, I didn't care.  Only Vash could make me lose control of my emotions like that; anger, desire, joy, sadness, all of these were under his control, it seemed.  "For your information, I was working a lot harder than this back when you were on the rampage and I had to try to stop you.  It's nice that your concerned now, but I came a lot closer to dying when you were the one leading me around than when I was just doing as I saw fit!"

"If I'm so much trouble, why do you even keep me around!" he demanded, his voice shaking and tears rolling down his cheeks from my outburst.

"I don't know, Vash!  Why the hell do I?" I was more than a little angry at that point, but you have to understand that I would never say that sort of thing and mean it.  It just…it came out.  Because I was angry and tired and in a foul mood and I hated when Vash made me feel guilty…for all those reasons I lashed out at him when I shouldn't have.  And of course, I couldn't have just quit while I was only somewhat behind.  No, that would have made sense, but I barreled right on, ignoring the completely injured look on Vash's face.  "You come here, you live like a bum while I feed you and clothe you and let you use my home as though it were your own, and suddenly you think you can tell me what to do?  Think again!  I pay the rent, and you don't , so this is my home, and not yours!" 

For a long, tense moment, my words hung in the air, and I thought that maybe, though they'd been a bit harsher than I'd originally intended, Vash would just leave me alone so I could calm down and tell him I didn't really mean that.  But before the anger left me completely so that I could take back what I'd said, Vash left the room in such a rush that I thought maybe he was going to go cry in the bathroom.  It wouldn't have been the first time.  I sighed, turning to organize my work slightly so that I'd be a bit calmer before I followed him and told him through the partition of the door that I hadn't really meant all that.

I heard a door slam then, and even though the sound of it was off, I assumed it was the bathroom door and turned to leave the room.  That's when I realized that the bathroom door was still cracked open, and I realized that I'd done something I hadn't thought possible.

I'd chased Vash away.  He was gone.

*****

The End (Of Part 7, That Is)