Okay, I just want you all to know that I do really appreciate reviews, but there are some times…okay, let me just say that if one more anonymous unsigned reviewer asks me about Vash's coat, I'm gonna blow a gasket. Perhaps I wouldn't mind so much, but the fact of the matter is that seriously, I'm under a lot of pressure right now. It's the end of the year, I'm prepping for finals, I just went through this obnoxious torture trying to secure my summer plans…basically, I mean to say that I do have a life. Yes, despite the weekly updates, I do have many other things to do, and sadly for you, this is not my top priority. It's a hobby. Oh Ashley, you are sooooooo hot. I want to do you. It's like all I ever think about. And although I like it a lot, I sometimes forget that I can't simply assume that my readers understand everything that I understood coming away from the show. Apparently, my subtlety is wasted on some of you, but I will give you a chance to figure it out for yourselves. I hate explaining things to people who should be able to figure it out for themselves anyway. And now, on with the show. Yes, Ashley, my sweet lover. You are such a tasty treat.
*****
Take My Hand
Part 10
*****
Do you remember as a child when you first started to keep things from your parents? Neither do I. It seems as though as soon as we learn to speak; we learn how to not speak at certain times as well. I like to think that this does not count as actually lying to your parents, as you aren't telling them anything about your transgressions, no matter what they might be, so you are simply withholding information. After all, if you steal a cookie and your mother never notices to ask you if you did it, you aren't lying by not simply volunteering that information. Obviously, if she didn't notice the cookie's absence, it was not really a major case of rule breaking from the beginning, so why cause trouble by making it into a big deal and telling her?
But sometimes, you know that your parents will learn the truth whether you tell them or not. For example, if your snitching older brother watches you steal the cookie, then you might as well go to your mother and tell her what you did, because you will likely be in for less punishment than you will suffer from when your brother tells her himself. Or, perhaps you've done something that's a lot more noticeable than stealing a cookie. Perhaps you've gotten yourself pregnant with the child of a man who your parents have never even met. Perhaps the man is a wanted outlaw with a sixty billion dollar bounty on his head. Then you start to wonder what exactly you have to tell your parents to avoid them finding out the truth by some other means and then never forgiving you for your edited version of the truth.
A parent's trust is a valuable thing, but behind the need to maintain that trusting relationship is the childhood fear that your parents will find out that you did something bad, or at least something they would think was bad. Could I possibly go home to my mother and father and introduce them to Vash, saying "This is the infamous Vash the Stampede, the father of my unborn child." Somehow, it didn't sound very good when I thought about it like that. And what would my brothers have to say when they found out what was going on between Vash and I? Perhaps the knowledge of his alleged past and his notoriety would be enough to keep them from trying to kill him, but somehow, I doubted that. Gavin and Aaron weren't the most forgiving men that I knew. They never had been. So I began to think that maybe…maybe I could keep everything from them. But I knew that wasn't the truth. If I pushed this thing any further, I was as good as caught with my hand in the cookie jar.
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Over the five days after I told Vash that we would be going to tell my parents all about us and the baby, I began to grow more and more worried as to what exactly I could possibly say to them. And would my brothers be there? I knew that they would not be happy to meet Vash, and they would be less than excited to hear the news about us. My mother…she might be happy since I was pretty sure she had an unending desire for me to get married and have lots of babies, but I also suspected she would be less than pleased about the fact that I hadn't told her more about Vash before we had conceived a child together. My father would either be very confused or somewhat surprised. He was generally a very laidback man, and he'd never reacted strongly to any news. I remembered once when Gavin had been arrested after a bar fight and my father had simply shrugged at the news and said "that kind of thing happens" while my mother had been ranting about how he was doomed to the life of a criminal now.
So one night, I decided that we really needed to have some predetermined course of action as far as the explanation and introduction went. The problem was, just how do you approach your lover and tell him that you feel unable to introduce him to your parents because of his criminal past without hurting his feelings? I supposed that I would just have to try my best. After all, despite our communication problems in the past, I really felt like things were getting a lot better between the two of us, and that if I only tried to tell him exactly how I felt while being as gentle as possible, things would work out. Also, I felt like the two of us had really worked on our compromising skills, so I felt that it wouldn't develop into some terrible argument, which was the last thing we needed at that point.
"Vash?" I spoke up the night before the dinner was supposed to occur. He had just climbed into bed beside me and was snuggling up against me when I decided that now was a good time to bring up the topic that had been troubling me.
"Mm hmm." He was behind me, kissing the back of my neck lazily to indicate that he was listening to me but would rather be going to sleep.
"I'm worried about tomorrow." That seemed like a good way to broach the subject. Nice and simple and to the point.
"I know, Meryl." Vash's voice was low, barely more than a whisper. "But you shouldn't worry. It'll be okay."
"Uh...yeah, I know." I don't know why, but the way he was rubbing my stomach softly made me blush deeply and distracted from my train of thought. He seemed to be utterly fascinated with my stomach ever since he found out what was inside of it. "I just...you know, I love you Vash."
"Yeah, I love you too." He confirmed, kissing the back of my neck again before he nuzzled against the crook of my shoulder. "We'll be fine."
"Yeah..." I knew he was right, but the fact of the matter was that we had to deal with the issue of his criminal identity before we decided to just introduce him to my parents and see where the chips would fall. "It's just...what do I tell my parents?"
"What do you mean?" he asked, kissing along the line of my shoulder. Apparently, he felt that he was entitled to do whatever he wanted with me if I was going to keep him awake.
"Well, you know that if I tell them you're Vash the Stampede, they'll know...who you are." I felt extremely uncomfortable with this line of questioning, but there was no way around it. "Can we really tell them? I mean...what if they want to turn you in or something?"
"Meryl, do you really think they'll turn me in?" Vash's voice was solemn now, utterly serious. If I answered in the affirmative, he would definitely believe me.
"I...don't know." I admitted. "My brothers will be mad. I don't know what they'll do. My dad...he probably will just welcome you to the family. My mom...she'll throw a fit even if there's nothing...questionable about you. But...I don't think she'd turn you in if she honestly believes that we're in love. My brothers are the key here. If I can convince them that you aren't taking advantage of their little sister, I suppose there would be a chance that they'll let you off. But if they think that you're some evil, murdering terror from the moment they meet you, then you won't have a chance."
"I won't have a chance?" I could tell that Vash was teasing me now for insinuating that my brothers could actually take him down.
"You know what I mean." I rolled my eyes. "If they want to turn you in...I don't know what we'll do. We'll have to leave here." There was a long silence from the man behind me, punctuated by a hot kiss pressed to my shoulder blade.
"You mean...I'll have to leave." he clarified. "You're not the one with the bounty on your head, Mer."
"I know." I blushed again slightly. "But do you really think that I'd let you leave me? We're in this thing together now, Vash. I want us to stay together, and I won't give that up if it means that we have to be on the run and I have to give up what bit of a life I've managed to build myself here." I paused, turning in his arms to face him, burying my face in his scarred chest as I spoke the next words. "Vash, you are my life now, and I won't give that up, not for anything."
A long silence greeted me, and I feared for a moment or two that I had said too much, and that Vash had finally decided I was far too obsessed with him, and he was going to call it quits and leave me. After a while, he began stroking long, slow circles on my back with his hands, and this relaxed me a bit. "Meryl, I've been meaning to ask you something, but I wanted to wait until I could afford...oh well."
"What is it?" I asked him tilting my head so that I could see his face. I always loved the way his eyes caught the smallest bits of light and seemed to almost glow in the dark room.
"Will you marry me?" His voice was soft, earnest, as though he expected me to turn him down on the spot or maybe even laugh at him. I couldn't say anything for some time, since I was so shocked and overjoyed at the sudden proposal. He wanted to marry me? I admit that I had hoped that perhaps, now that I was pregnant, he might consider it, but I suppose that I never really thought that someone like Vash, such a beautiful, mysterious entity, would ever want to stay in one place for that long. I suppose I must have stayed quiet for too long, because he shifted slightly and spoke up again. "I...I meant to get you a ring so I could ask properly...I've been saving up, but I just don't have enough for the one I want yet...so I know if you don't want..." I lunged up, capturing his lips with mine and effectively ending his explanation. When we broke, I could feel myself grinning like an idiot, but I couldn't have cared less what I looked like at the moment.
"Vash, I don't need a ring." I whispered into his ear, and I could feel as I pressed my cheek to his, the tears that were spilling down his face. I kissed the wet streaks and hugged him more closely to me. "I love you so much...I'll marry you Vash. Of course I will." He really started crying then, but it was due to his happiness, and I realized after a few moments of heated kisses that tears were streaking their way across my cheeks as well.
"I'll make you so happy, you'll see." Vash told me throatily as I worked to pull my nightgown off, lost in the passion and the joy of the moment.
"You already have." I told him before leaning in for more deep kisses and soft caresses. Somehow, as we made love in our bed, the night becoming deeper around us as we let the time pass us by, I suddenly could have cared less whether or not my parents approved. I didn't care if my brothers decided to turn him in and we had to spend the rest of our lives together on the run. If we were together, nothing else mattered. I loved Vash so much, I thought my heart would burst.
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"Do I look okay?" Vash was awfully nervous as we reached my parents' house the next day, smoothing the nice black dress shirt I had purchased the day before for the occasion every few minutes. I smiled up at him offering him a quick peck on the cheek before turning up the familiar old walkway with him hand in hand.
"You look great, Vash." I assured him. I didn't have to lie, of course, as he looked wonderful in the nice shirt and slacks that he'd eyed doubtfully that afternoon before hesitantly agreeing to wear whatever I "thought was best." I was wearing a dark blue dress, nothing very fancy, but enough to make my mom happy. I rarely wore dresses and skirts, and she was constantly nagging me to do so. I could tell from the way Vash kept eyeing me that he appreciated the simple cut dress a lot more than I did. I didn't like the way dresses fit me. They didn't seem very sensible, but if it would soften my mother up, I decided that it was well worth it. "Don't worry, everything will be fine." It seemed as though we'd been telling each other that a record number of times over the past week. I hoped it was true.
"You're right. Let's do this." He nodded bravely and I reached forward, knocking on the door of the house where I had grown up. Immediately, I could hear shuffling, and the muffled voice of my mother.
"I'm coming! Just a moment! Arnold, stay out of the kitchen!" she was just chastising my father as she opened the door, her eyes going from my dress to the man whose hand I was still holding firmly, as though for the courage needed to face her. "Meryl! Sweetie, I'm so glad you could make it! And you brought a guest!" This word was emphasized, and suddenly, I could hear people rushing to join my mother. I could barely hold the groan back as I recognized my two older brothers, Aaron and Gavin, already glaring daggers at poor Vash. I should have known that the one Friday I actually come to my mother's for dinner, they would be there as well. None of us were very regular in accepting her weekly invitation, but they went home more often than I did, I knew that much at least.
"Hey Merry." Aaron, the older of the two looked down at me with dark brown eyes shielded from view partially by his eternally messy black hair. I blushed slightly at the nickname, as it still managed to make me feel like a little girl. "Who's this?"
"Now, you two, let your sister in before you start on all that." my mother, a woman who was just as tiny as myself, still managed to push the two large men out of the way so that Vash and I could enter and I could take off my jacket. Vash still refused to buy a coat, and I was almost positive that the bag he kept under the bed contained his old red jacket, which he kept hidden away for obvious reasons. That was one thing he wanted to be able to keep from wearing ever again, if he could help it. Gavin took my coat, shooting a glare at Vash before offering me a smile which lit up his dark blue eyes. His hair was a sandy brown like our father's had been before it went grey, and it struck me how much he looked like a younger version of my father.
"Got a boyfriend now, Merry?" he asked as I mused on this idea, bringing another blush to my cheeks. Damn brothers, they knew how to embarrass me all too well. "I was starting to think that maybe you just didn't like anything that didn't involve a big fat stack of forms."
"Very funny." I had to resist the urge to stick my tongue out at Gavin. He always disapproved of how much time and effort I spent on my line of work, but he didn't even know about the dangerous missions I'd been sent on. I was pretty sure that if I ever did tell my brothers about exactly what my job entailed, they'd force me into an early retirement. "Where's dad?"
"I'm coming, I'm coming." the voice was still as I'd always remembered it, full of laughter and good humor. It was soon followed by the appearance of my father, who's eyes were still the same piercing blue they'd always been, but thick streaks of grey lined his head of hair, and deep creases lined his aging face. Somehow, it made me feel immeasurably older to see my parents aging. "Now what's this all about?"
"Meryl's brought a guest to dinner." My mother's voice could not have been more ecstatic had she been telling my father that they had won the lottery and would never have to worry about money for the rest of their lives. "Now, Meryl, why don't you introduce us to this nice young man?" she prompted me. She was practically bouncing on her heels, she was so excited. I suppose I wasn't entirely surprised at this, as she'd been nagging me to find a "nice boy to settle down with" nonstop for about ten years. At least it made me less frightened of what her response would be. My brothers still looked like they wanted to hang him from the roof by his ankles.
Vash and I had already gone over what exactly we thought the best course of action would be, but now that my family was facing us expectantly, I found my tongue frozen, and all I could do was shoot Vash a pleading glance. His answer to this was to lace his fingers through mine and give me a reassuring smile. Easy for him to be calm about it. He didn't have to say anything hard. "Mom, dad, Gavin, Aaron." I addressed them all noticing with some irritation that I had the insane urge to turn around and run out of the door and never come back. That wouldn't solve anything, and I knew it. I'd just have to be strong. "This is Vash." That's right, Meryl, ease them into it. No need to tell them everything all at once.
"Oh, Vash, it's nice to meet you!" My mother, of course, rushed forward to take his hand, shaking it eagerly as he was forced to let go of my own hand. "I'm Meryl's mother, but you may call me Ellen."
"It's nice to meet you, Ellen." Vash smiled that sweet, winning smile that I had so been hoping would soften up any resistance we encountered. My mother was still completely pleased with the idea that I'd brought a man home, so she obviously didn't need the smile, but my brothers still looked rather doubtful about it all. After my mother was finished with gushing over the handshake, my father took her place, a rather amused grin quirking his lips as he stuck his own hand out and shook Vash's in a friendly manner.
"I'm Arnold, Meryl's father." he greeted my lover, seeming to take this whole meeting entirely in stride. I had known father wouldn't be a problem, though. "It's nice to meet you, Vash."
"Mom said you were seeing some guy. Is this him?" Gavin asked me after my father was finished. Aaron was still just glaring at Vash, who, to his credit, didn't seem the slightest bit disturbed by their open hostility.
"Yes, Vash and I have been living together for quite some time now." I told Gavin forcefully, tilting my head to one side. "I've been meaning to bring him over for all of you to meet...I just got a bit busy."
"I'll bet." Aaron snorted slightly, giving Vash a critical once-over. "He looks like he takes a lot of work."
"Aaron, wouldn't you like to introduce yourself to Vash?" My mother's tone would have sounded perfectly normal to the casual observer, but my brothers could easily recognize that she was about ten seconds from slapping them both upside the head, no matter how much taller than her they were.
"Oh, yeah, I'm Meryl's older brother." Aaron offered his hand as though he was being forced to be polite.
"Meryl was right about you, Aaron." Vash told him in a perfectly cheerful tone. "You look just like your father, but you act nothing like him from what I've seen."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Aaron, of course, took this as some sort of an insult, but I think that it was all for the best, since my mother then actually did smack him upside the head, and I have to say that I think he deserved it.
"I apologize for the boys. They're rather...protective of their baby sister." I hated it when my mom called me a baby in any way. It was so utterly demeaning, whether she meant it to be or not.
"Now that everyone's met everyone, why don't we eat? Is dinner ready, Ellen?" I loved my father so much at that moment. He always knew how to diffuse something dangerous before it became too much.
"Oh! Yes, let's eat!" My mother bustled into the kitchen and the rest of us followed, turning into the dining room where she was just setting out the last of the food. As she pulled up an extra chair for Vash, we all took our places around the table. Mom was at one end with my father at the other, and even though Aaron made a noble effort to sit next to me to separate Vash and I, my lover was too fast for him and my brothers sat across from the two of us. As soon as we sat down, Vash leaned over to offer me a quick peck on the cheek, and I was stunned at the bravery he was showing in front of my brothers. Maybe everything would work out.
"So then, Vash." My mother began the conversation as we passed food around. "What was your last name, then?"
"Oh...um, he doesn't really...that is..." why had I not considered this before? Obviously, they would want to know what his last name was! How stupid could I possibly be? "Vash...he doesn't really have a surname."
"Oh?" My mother took that surprisingly well. "Are you an orphan, dear?" she turned him a sympathetic smile.
"Something like that." He confirmed, smiling at me and grabbing my hand under the table. Things were going rather well.
"That must be terrible! But you seem to have turned out well enough. Now then, what do you do for a living?" my mother asked him, still all smiles.
"Vash used to be a sort of...jack of all trades." I told my mother. Well, that wasn't exactly a lie. "But his work made him move around a lot, so when he decided to stay with me, he was forced to find something else to do. He's been working at a little diner lately, but I've told him he doesn't need to have a job at all, really. I make plenty, and he does all the housework, so I feel like that arrangement is just fine."
"That's a bit of an ongoing issue between us, I'm afraid." Vash smiled warmly at my family. "I wish I could make enough money so that she wouldn't have to work so hard, but she claims that I don't need to work at all. Right now we're compromising."
"You're dating a waiter?" Gavin snorted incredulously. "What a loser."
"Gavin, I hardly think that someone who lived in their parents' basement for two years without a job just because they were lazy has call to judge others on their employment decisions." I told him sharply.
"Now, now, you two." my mother shook her head apologetically at Vash. "All three of them bicker nonstop if you let them. It's always something between them. Did you have any brothers or sisters, Vash?"
"I...had a brother." Vash's voice cracked on that one and I dropped my fork in shock. Why had I not considered that my parents might ask about his family. How stupid could I be?
"Vash doesn't like to talk about his family." I spoke up immediately. "It's a bit of a sad story and it's still hard for him."
"Oh! I'm so sorry, dear." My mother looked aghast at her own curiosity. "I had no idea! I didn't mean to pry."
"Don't worry about it." he smiled at her, but it was a little shaky. I found his hand again and gave it a squeeze. We would get through this together, I was sure.
"So, why are you just now bringing him home, Merry?" Aaron wanted to know. "Something's up, isn't it?" Gavin and him redoubled their campaign to burn holes through Vash with their eyes.
"Actually," I cleared my throat and wiped my mouth, looking at Vash for a moment before continuing. "Vash and I plan to get married."
"What?" Aaron was aghast.
"Already?" Gavin pounded the table with his fist. "We've only met him once!"
"Oh! That's so lovely!" My mother was, of course, completely ecstatic. "How long have you been together now?"
"Well, I've known him for a few years, but we've only just been together for six months." I blushed slightly before continuing. "I think I've loved him for most of the time I've known him, though."
"Me too." Vash leaned over and kissed my forehead softly.
"That's not all." I decided that at least with dad seeming neutral and mom excited, I might as well finish it all off. "I'm pregnant."
"What?" Aaron repeated.
"Is it his?" Gavin looked ready to kill.
"Oh! Sweetheart! Oh, give me a hug!" my mother was practically squealing with delight, tears pouring down her face as she jumped up and came over to my seat, arms outstretched. I smiled, hugging her and feeling glad that she was so pleased. If she was on my side, I was positive that she could convince the boys to leave Vash alone. Father looked a bit surprised, but he was still smiling, so I figured that everything was, after all, going to be okay. My mother let go of me, only to attack Vash with her sobbing tight hugs. "I've wanted...for so long! And then I thought when Aaron had that nice girlfriend, but they never wanted to have any children, and now...all of the sudden! I'm going to be a grandmother!"
"What are you hoping for?" my father asked. Vash and I looked at each other, surprised that we hadn't even considered the gender of our child yet.
"It doesn't matter." we spoke at the same time, laughing slightly as my mom returned to her seat, still looking rather teary-eyed.
"It'll be so adorable, won't it, Arnold?" my mother was in a dreamlike state that frightened me just a bit. "I can hardly wait to see it."
"I hope it doesn't look like him." Aaron offered. Gavin was trembling with fury, but Aaron looked rather resigned to his fate as unwilling uncle and brother-in-law. "Fucking ugly baby."
"Aaron Mitchell Stryfe!" my mother was immediately upon him like an angry avenger. "That is quite enough from you! Gavin, if you even think of hurting anyone at this table, I will personally take you over my knee and spank you! Don't try to tell me you're too old for that, either!"
"Sorry mom." they both answered, blushing and suddenly looking about twenty years younger, like sheepish teenagers who'd been caught misbehaving.
It might have not been everything I could have hoped for, but it was more than enough for me. As Vash and I left that night amid tearful pleas from my mother to return as soon as possible and ill-concealed glares from my brothers, I felt as though my world, so in danger of collapsing beneath me for the past month or so, had finally been set right. I was in love and I was truly content with my lot in life.
*****
The End (Of Part 10, That Is)
