VERY SECRET DIARIES OF HOGWARTS: BOOK THREE!
READ THIS CRAP OR DIE!
Yes, it has happened. I got a few days off to write the third book's diaries! Hooray for everything! Immediately after this I must work on quidditch robes and thus earn my keep. But for now, I write. By the way, the reason my Snape's Proposal for the Dark Arts fiction is missing is because FanFiction.net deleted it for being "too interactive" (i.e. the Sevi Says letter column). So, I will be reposting it, sans letters, very soon. I'm pissed because it was my highest amount of reviews ever. . .it got more reviews than everything else put together, in fact! So when I repost it, it would be nice if you could add a review for my sake *sniff* AND so as not to let down the peeps who still haven't gotten their letters answered, I'm putting your letters in a special livejournal for Sevi to answer letters from is it won't violate FF.net's rules. ;) Hooray! I also updated my bio page so you can actually visit a working link for my Wizard's Gear Shop! Amazing.
About this story: BEAR IN MIND, I still have FIVE more diaries to go on this one. But I thought I'd just post the first four now to get it started.
And don't EVEN ask me to write the fourth book's diaries, unless some kindhearted fan would like to sit down and make a detailed list for me of all the major events. That's what I do to write every set of diaries, but the fourth book has way too many jumbled up events for me to deal with right now. But if YOU'D like to deal with them, I'll gladly write the fourth diaries. Email your help to webpriestess@hotmail.com. Also any delicious recipes, because my cooking is frankly not up to par and I'm having a damn hard time of it finding a boyfriend who can cook. I might have to fall back on my usual plan of dating guys who just pay for everything.
Now for the spiel.
All characters contained herein are part and parcel of the many-headed Chimera that is J.K. "Do these initials make me look like Tolkien?" Rowling. Violators will be hollowed out and made into human condos. For vampires. With pets.
For those of you who own multiple calendars that you actually set to the correct month (as opposed to setting them to whatever is the coolest picture in the calendar, like I do), feel free to blow your nose on the dates in these diaries, because they just don't matter. That's right, the dates don't matter, like that My First Bra your sister wore when she was 13. They don't matter like the ten percent off coupon Snape has for Hot Topic. He buys in wholesale bulk from there anyway. He's really not gonna save much more money than that.
DISCLAIMERS ARE FUN! I think we all know what very secret diaries contain. They contain innuendo. Brevity and innuendo. There shall be no hardcore nonsense, just poking a little fun at slash. No one's tongue shall be in any mouths other than their own at any time onscreen. However, they will have extremely censored dirty thoughts. If you bother to write a review about how I totally didn't warn you, I shall either delete your review, or email you about how ignorant you are, or do both and then I shall set fire to your review and dance around it in an alcohol-fueled worship of Bacchus, god of wine and festivities. If you don't like slash, then don't review telling me about how you don't like it. To be honest, I'm not a big fan of serious slash either. But I also don't purposely go out onto the web, read all the slash I can find and then say, "Oh my god, this is horrible, I can't believe you people wrote this. I would never want to read this.except I just did. Knowingly. And without reason."
You're here of your own free will, people. If you don't approve, go bake some muffins and skip this story.
And as always, fan fiction is dumb. Don't read it.
READ THIS CRAP OR DIE!
Yes, it has happened. I got a few days off to write the third book's diaries! Hooray for everything! Immediately after this I must work on quidditch robes and thus earn my keep. But for now, I write. By the way, the reason my Snape's Proposal for the Dark Arts fiction is missing is because FanFiction.net deleted it for being "too interactive" (i.e. the Sevi Says letter column). So, I will be reposting it, sans letters, very soon. I'm pissed because it was my highest amount of reviews ever. . .it got more reviews than everything else put together, in fact! So when I repost it, it would be nice if you could add a review for my sake *sniff* AND so as not to let down the peeps who still haven't gotten their letters answered, I'm putting your letters in a special livejournal for Sevi to answer letters from is it won't violate FF.net's rules. ;) Hooray! I also updated my bio page so you can actually visit a working link for my Wizard's Gear Shop! Amazing.
About this story: BEAR IN MIND, I still have FIVE more diaries to go on this one. But I thought I'd just post the first four now to get it started.
And don't EVEN ask me to write the fourth book's diaries, unless some kindhearted fan would like to sit down and make a detailed list for me of all the major events. That's what I do to write every set of diaries, but the fourth book has way too many jumbled up events for me to deal with right now. But if YOU'D like to deal with them, I'll gladly write the fourth diaries. Email your help to webpriestess@hotmail.com. Also any delicious recipes, because my cooking is frankly not up to par and I'm having a damn hard time of it finding a boyfriend who can cook. I might have to fall back on my usual plan of dating guys who just pay for everything.
Now for the spiel.
All characters contained herein are part and parcel of the many-headed Chimera that is J.K. "Do these initials make me look like Tolkien?" Rowling. Violators will be hollowed out and made into human condos. For vampires. With pets.
For those of you who own multiple calendars that you actually set to the correct month (as opposed to setting them to whatever is the coolest picture in the calendar, like I do), feel free to blow your nose on the dates in these diaries, because they just don't matter. That's right, the dates don't matter, like that My First Bra your sister wore when she was 13. They don't matter like the ten percent off coupon Snape has for Hot Topic. He buys in wholesale bulk from there anyway. He's really not gonna save much more money than that.
DISCLAIMERS ARE FUN! I think we all know what very secret diaries contain. They contain innuendo. Brevity and innuendo. There shall be no hardcore nonsense, just poking a little fun at slash. No one's tongue shall be in any mouths other than their own at any time onscreen. However, they will have extremely censored dirty thoughts. If you bother to write a review about how I totally didn't warn you, I shall either delete your review, or email you about how ignorant you are, or do both and then I shall set fire to your review and dance around it in an alcohol-fueled worship of Bacchus, god of wine and festivities. If you don't like slash, then don't review telling me about how you don't like it. To be honest, I'm not a big fan of serious slash either. But I also don't purposely go out onto the web, read all the slash I can find and then say, "Oh my god, this is horrible, I can't believe you people wrote this. I would never want to read this.except I just did. Knowingly. And without reason."
You're here of your own free will, people. If you don't approve, go bake some muffins and skip this story.
And as always, fan fiction is dumb. Don't read it.
