Reverie and That Song She Sings

Part 2

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Find A Broken Halo

I closed the door to my room, not bothering to switch on the light to see where I was placing my feet. Then my calves felt the softness of blankets and I knew I had found where I needed to go. I let myself fall to my bed. I sat there for a minute on the chilled mattress before stretching out, my nightgown sliding silkily across my thighs. I lay still, except for breathing, idly staring into the shadows of my room, not even caring that my eyes caught no color other than black.

Black… the mood rings always say that stands for excitement. Yeah, right.

I reached up to my face and felt my cheek with the back of my hand. My thoughts were confirmed as I felt the layer of heat burn up to my cooler flesh. Thank God it had been dark in that room, otherwise Spike would've seen me blush. Then he'd tease me for months on end.

Your so stupid, Faye…

I winced at the fresh memory as it took freefall through my brain and into my heart. It gave a violent shove on my entire system. I clenched my fists until the bitterness began to ebb.

Stupid for kissing him and then letting him go…

But had he been awake to know what I had done? It now felt sinful, and I felt nearly dirty. I was guilty for opening my heart in the darkness to him. I had killed everything with one action. Now we'll both walk like awkward puppets around each other, try to find new words for this new meaning.

This fish wasn't hungry, or its just plain dumb.

I stretched the muscles in my thighs restlessly. They ached for movement in the aftermath of a kiss. I writhed upon the covers to soothe their want to move, but nothing could beat a good walk. Finally, I stood up from my heated mattress and jumbled sheets to walk out to the lobby again. It was still dark, but I could tell that Spike had gotten up for his room so not to be bothered by anybody else or he had gone to take a shower.

I'll bet you'd love to "accidentally" walk in…

The idea seemed enticing, and nearly funny. But I shook away these thoughts and quietly made my way across the room. I slipped by the bathroom, and cautiously put my ear to the door, straining to hear anything that would show he was there. All I heard was the small hum of the water heater.

Where is he?

I began to tiptoe around the ship, which was totally useless, since he was probably going to find me before I found him.

Damnit, where is he?

Not in the hangar.

Not in his room.

I bit my lip. Secret worry about him crept up from somewhere hidden deep.

Don't you dare feel lost without him…you're stronger than that.

I turned a corner and nearly gasped out of fright. There he was, his figure a tall shadow against space. He was staring out the window at whatever was out there.

"Need something?"

His voice slid across the air, breaking it and all its darkness. My lips fumbled for a response. For the second time, he had caught me off guard.

No, don't talk to me. Go back to watching the stars… back to being beautiful…

"No… I… nothing…"

Oh, geez, how lame did you sound right there, missy?

He turned around to face me. His eyes shimmered with must have been all the light in the room. He just kinda looked at me. I could see his eyes shift and look me over from heel to head. I began to feel vulnerable in my revealing nightgown.

"You sure?"

Can this guy read minds or something?! I could feel my neck start to heat up as the blood began its little dance in my cheeks.

Damnit, stop blushing, idiot!

I didn't say anything else. I averted my gaze and then kept my eyes on the ground.

"Ya know," he said, "I don't appreciate having makeup put on me while I sleep…"

My mouth nearly fell open, but only my eyes managed to respond to the shock by widening. Spike didn't seem to notice this, and I was relieved. So he had been asleep! The only evidence that anything had happened was a smear of deep red on his lips.

"Revenge is sweet, though," I said with a grin and a lie. He raised an eyebrow.

"Revenge for what?"

"Making Ein go romping about in my clothes, turning off the hot water for a week, stealing my smokes…"

"Oh."

He pulled something from his pocket, then I heard the quick sound of the lighter, then saw the red-orange glow as it lit up his features. His hair was a mess again, more than it usually was, but that was what made me look. The shadows bounced into the hollow between jaw and cheekbone for the one moment that the small flame was kept alive. He looked up at me with a curious look spread across his face.

I then realized that I was staring again. I turned my head. He saw this too.

Love only gets you in trouble, Faye.

And Spike Spiegel is a barrel full of it.

Silence wove its fingers around us once more. Then he shifted in his spot to lean against the glass, leaving me to stare at the place where he once stood, to look past it as well to see the eternity of stars.

Stupid Spike. It's all his fault anyway.

All his fault for having amazing eyes, all his fault for having the strangest hair. It was his fault that he was so serious, but so idiotic at times. It was his fault for being an arrogant lunkhead. His fault for being so damn brave. His fault that he didn't turn you in for bounty cash a long time ago.

All his fault for being one of the kindest men you've ever known.

Yeah…

"Spike…"

"Yeah?"

Again my brain felt suddenly jumbled up with every other part of my body.

"Spike… I…"

"Yeah…"

I looked up at him. Jesus, he was beautiful against the stars. He was paying attention now. His eyes were set on me, and me only. Maybe, within this moment, nothing else existed to either of us.

Yeah, nice fantasy.

"Spike, I L… L…"

"What?"

No more nonchalant "yeah" came down from his mouth. No more arrogance, no longer stupid. He may have known which path I had started taking with my words.

"I l… I lied."

My abrupt curve caused silence. This blurt made the air suddenly thick. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"What are you talking about?"

I turned my eyes down. There was no way I could look into his face now.

What are you doing Faye?

What are you doing Faye?

What are you doing Faye?

I found a broken halo this morning…

Does it happen to belong to you?

You claim, but that cannot be true

For I can hear it as she sings

Reverie, reverie

The broken halo belongs…

To me…

The mini-poem is mine.

So what do you think of this small continuation? I will probably add more later, but tell me what you think now.