Okay, here is the third chapter. I sure had a lot of fun writing it. So I hope that you like it. I wanted to upload it Friday night, but forgot about the downtime. Oh well...I got it done. Enjoy! And if you want to...Review.
Remember I own nothing from the Lord of the Rings books! Except for the idea of a prissy cheerleader in Middle Earth. So don't take it! And the character Christina belongs to me too.
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The next morning, Christina woke up last. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, the sun was coming up.
"Good morning." Sam greeted her.
Christina looked at him. He still had her headphones on his head. "Morning." She said. She then noticed that Frodo was cooking something, while everyone else was packing up the camp. Merry and Pippin were nowhere to be found, which scared her.
She stood up and reached into her bag for her hair brush and make-up bag. "This sucks. I'm tired, I look like crap...and now I have to walk again." She thought as she began to brush her hair.
"Would you like something to eat?" Frodo asked her as he sat down on the ground next to her.
"No thanks." She said. "I usually don't eat breakfast." She said.
"You don't?" Frodo asked. "My, you are nothing like Pippin."
"I wouldn't want to be like Pippin." Christina thought as she began to braid her hair.
Aragorn came over. "I would suggest you bundling up. We are going through a mountain pass, it may get cold for you with bare legs." He told her.
"Yeah, yeah..." Christina said. She then tyed a rubber band around the bottom of her braid and then went to look for her pants. "YES!" She screamed as she was digging in her bag.
"What is it?" Frodo asked. Everyone was looking at her as though she was crazy.
Christina looked at Frodo. "Could you possibly boil some water for me?" She asked.
Frodo nodded, and looking confused. But he got up and went over to the fire.
Christina went and changed into her jeans and baby tee which said, "Brat" on it behind some trees. Her uniform was so dirty, now she would have to have it dry-cleaned. Great, she hated spending money on that. But oh well. She pulled her Doc Martin boots out of her bag and laced them up before going back to the camp.
Frodo was at the fire with a pot of boiling water. Christina pulled out an instant coffee pack from her bag (a/n: kind of like a tea bag, but with coffee, cream, and sugar in it *I don't know if there is such a thing, but according to me, there is, and if not...the idea is MINE*).
Frodo put the boiling water in a cup and handed it to Christina. "Here you go. Is that enough water for you?"
Christina nodded. "Yes it is." She said. "Thank you so much." She then dropped her coffee pack into it and swirled it around.
Frodo watched her, curious as to watch she had put in the water. Merry and Pippin walked up by his side.
"What is she doing?" Pippin asked Frodo.
"I don't know..." Frodo answered. They continued to watch her, a little confused.
Christina took a sip of her coffee. Nice, hot Starbucks coffee in the morning was always a wonderful thing to have. She loved the smell, and inhaled it as she held the cup in her hand. She then noticed that Frodo and Pippin where staring at her.
"Yes?" She asked.
"What do you have in that cup that makes you so happy?" Pippin asked.
"My breakfast." Christina told him.
"Oh no...You said the word..." Frodo said.
Pippin's eyes grew big. "Breakfast?" He asked, then ran over to Christina and began pulling at her arm. "Would you be willing to share?"
Christina raised the cup above her head. "No I wouldn't." She said. "Stop jumping on me!"
Pippin stopped a minute. But then continued to pull at her arms. "Please. Just a little bit."
"Is there a problem here?" Gandalf asked.
Pippin stopped jumping. "She will not share her breakfast with me." He said.
Gandalf shook his head. "Christina...Pippin loves his breakfast. And lately, hasn't been getting his fill lately. It would mean a great deal to him if you share your own breakfast with him."
Christina rolled her eyes. "Alright..."
"Thank you. We shall be on the moving soon." He said. He then turned and walked away.
Pippin gave Christina a look that said, "You heard him". Christina then lowered her arms. She took the little tea/coffee pack out of her cup and handed it to him. "Here, suck on this..." She said. "That should teach him to want *my* breakfast." She thought.
Pippin looked at it, but then put it in his mouth. He began to suck on it, then shook his head. "This tastes funny." He said.
Christina just shrugged and walked away. She rolled up the blankets and put everything back in her bag.
Sam was helping her make room in her bag for everything when Merry and Aragorn came over to them.
"What have you done to Pippin?" Merry yelled.
Christina gave them a confused look as she zipped up her bag. "Excuse me? What did I do to Pippin...Your the one who disappeared with him for who knows how long...I'm a little lost."
"He is running around like mad. Gandalf said you shared your breakfast with him." Aragorn told her.
Christina shook her head. "What?" She asked. "Show me."
Aragorn and Merry led her over to where the rest of the companions where. And she did infact see Pippin running around and jumping up and down. Almost like someone pressed the fast forward button.
"Care to explain this?" Aragorn asked her.
Christina scoffed and kicked dirt at him. She then went over to Pippin and stopped him. "Pippin...Pippin! No...Stop jumping..." She said trying to get him to calm down. He finally did for a moment. "Pippin...That little packet I gave you...What did you do with it?"
"I ate it." He said.
"What?" She asked weakly hoping he didn't eat the coffee beans really.
"Yes, I torn it open and ate those little black things inside of the paper." He said. "I must say, it tastes quite bitter at first, but it is actually the best thing I have ever eaten. You must share your breakfast with me tomorrow." He said and then ran off, eventually tripping over something and falling on his face about five yards ahead. "I'm okay!" He then got up and continued to run around.
"Christina...What did he eat?" Gandalf asked her as she sat there in dismay.
"He ate coffee beans..." She said in dismay.
"Co-Fee beans?" Gandalf asked. "What are those?"
Christina sighed. "Well...they have a lot of caffine in them, and caffine gives you a lot of energy." She said. "Sort of."
"But you drank it...Why aren't you running a muck like he is?" Gandalf asked.
"Because, I drank it...He ate them..." Christina told him. "And I am used to having it."
"Well, I suppose we will not have to carry him today on our journey." Gandalf sighed. "But it will wear off, right. Oh please say yes."
"Yes...In a couple of hours." Christina said.
"Well, then let us be on our way." Gandalf said. "Pippin! Stop harrassing that bird!"
The nine companions, and Christina walked on the rest of the day. Soon, they were walking uphill in the snow. Christina was cold, but she kept walking. Pippin was having no problem plowing through the snow which came up to his knees.
"I can't believe this? Why didn't you bring horses? That would have made it much easier to get through this snow." Christina complained. She had fallen behind everyone, and was getting the feeling they wanted to leave her behind.
Christina noticed that Frodo tripped and Aragorn caught him. But Boromir picked something and was staring at it for quite some time, and then Aragorn demanded he give it back to Frodo.
Christina walked by them and noticed that Aragorn was eyeing Boromir and holding onto his sword as though he was about to fight Boromir. She rolled her eyes as she walked by. "Yeah thats nice. Defend the halfing and leave me at the bottom of the mountain for dead!" She yelled at him as she walked by. "You know, you must think that you all are soooo much better than women. And since I can't fend for myself, you think that I will be left all alone and somehow go back to New York. Well guess what. If I die, I will make sure I come back as a ghost to bring slow, painful deaths to all of you." She declared to all of them.
Christina walked ahead and ended up walking next to Gandalf. "I'm tired. When are we going to stop?" She whined.
"Not for quite some time. We have to get through this mountain pass no later than today." Gandalf answered, he then continued walking ahead of her.
"But I'm tired!" Christina yelled at her. "This isn't fun! I hate this and I want to go home!"
She then sat down on the snow covered ground. She was getting snow in her pants and shoes, but she didn't care. She wanted nothing more than to go home. It was then that she had a breakdown and cried as though she had just been dumped by her boyfriend.
Everyone in the company, excpet Pippin who was running around and eating snow, looked at Christina. Tears were pouring from her eyes and she was squealing (*Think of the break-up scene in Legally Blonde when Elle was crying*)
Aragorn stopped to comfort her. "Is something wrong?"
"Well duh! I want to go home. I'm tired and I'm hungry and I look awful. I want to go home! I miss my boyfriend. I miss my parents. I even miss my stupid brother!" She then began to squeal again.
"But you must calm down." He told her. "We still have a long way to go and crying isn't going to get you anywhere."
Christina looked at him. "We still have a long way to go?"
Aragorn nodded. "Yes."
"Oh no!" She wailed and then rolled over on her stomach and began kicking the ground as though a little kid would.
"Is there anything that will..." He then looked ahead at Pippin who was currently jumping off a rock ahead of them. Aragorn suddenly got an idea and ran ahead to get Pippin.
Pippin quickly climbed up the rock that was about six feet high and when he got to the top edge he jumped down and hit the ground with a thud. He then got up and shook her snow off him and yelled. "Again!" And ran around the climb up the rock.
Aragorn watched the hobbit fall off the rock again. When he fell, it looked as though Pippin really hurt himself. Aragorn ran to his side. "Pippin are you alright?"
Pippin shook the snow off of his head and then looked at Aragorn and yelled. "Again!"
Aragorn stopped him from climbing up the rock. "Pippin, did you enjoy the breakfast that Christina shared with you?"
"Oh yes very much!" The hobbit said trying to get up the rock.
"Well, Christina isn't looking right now so how about you go down there and just take some more from her bag." Aragorn said.
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Pippin yelled. He then ran down to Christina's bag, and noticed that Christina was still crying and making that awful noise. He then went over to her bag and opened it.
Sam and Frodo were trying to get Christina to calm down. Which made it just that easier for Pippin to get into her bag.
"But it won't be that hard." Sam told her.
"We could help you." Frodo offered.
Christina just continued to cry and squeal.
"Make the noise stop!" Legolas yelled covering his ears.
Christina looked up and then walked over and got up and got in his face. "Listen buddy...I'm not used to walking all day up hill. I'm tired. I need sleep..I..."
Legolas cut her off. "You need to wash those black lines off your face." He said.
"I can't! There is no water around for me to do so. Not like it matters. I have no cute guys to impress anyway." Christina said.
"Are you telling me that I am not 'cute' as you would say?" Legolas looked offended.
"Well yeah." Christina said. "I mean, not even Hanson had their hair so long."
"Hanson?" Legolas asked.
Christina just then dropped back onto the ground and began crying again. "Whats the point? I'm never going to get home and I'm never going to..." She then looked up and noticed that Pippin was going through her gym bag. She then jumped back up and charged at the hobbit. "PIIIIIIIIIPPPPIIIIIIIN!" Christina screamed as she ran at him.
Pippin finally found the coffee pack and ate the coffee beans out of it. He then noticed that Christina was running up the hill screaming. "Uh oh." He then picked up her bag and ran up the hill screaming. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"You little! I hate you! I can't believe you went through my bag!" Christina yelled.
Pippin and Christina ran past everyone to the front of the line. Pippin was somehow was outrunning Christina quite well.
Aargorn smirked as he saw Christina chasing Pippin. "I knew that would work." He thought to himself.
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After hours of walking, and Christina and Pippin running. He finally gave up and gave her bag back. But when she caught him, she was too tired to hurt him, so she just took her bag back.
The wind picked up, and the snow was blowing in their faces. It was even colder than ever. Gandalf led the way, Aragorn and Boromir had to carry the hobbits through the snow, Gimli seemed to be having a bit of trouble walking through the waist deep snow, Legolas was somehow walking on the snow, and Christina was just dragging her bag through the snow behind everyone.
"Why do the hobbits get a free ride!" She yelled. "This is not far at all."
Suddenly, Christina ran into Boromir. "Hey wait, why did we stop?"
Boromir turned to her. "We are debating what to do. Saurman is trying to bring down the mountain."
Christina just looked at him confused. She then heard Gandalf yelling something into the wind. Then a huge pile of snow fell on top of all of them.
Christina acted as though she was swimming and pushed with her arms and jumped up. She looked around and everyone was already out of the snow mound and fighting. She didn't pay attention, she was more worried about the fact that she probably wasn't going to get back to New York, she was going to die of hypothermea (sp?).
"We shall go through the mines!" She heard Frodo yelled.
"Whatever we do can we get off this mountain!" Christina yelled (actually demanded) to all of them. They all turned to look at her, and she couldn't exactly see them, but it looked as though they all rolled her eyes.
"If we are to go through the mines, then yes we will be getting off this mountain." Gandalf told Christina as he was walking towards her. "Follow me."
Everyone turned and began following Gandalf down the mountain. But once again Christina lagged behind. She was tired and hungry enough as it was, but after chasing Pippin, it seemed as though all her energy had been drained and she just wanted to sit down and rest. But that was impossible.
"You know...If I were one of the hobbits you would carry me!" Christina continued to yell at them. "I hate you! I hate all of you! I want to go home!"
No one payed attention to her, but then an idea popped into her head.
"I'm going to cry again!" She yelled.
She could tell that they stopped to see if she was telling the truth. Ah the plan was working.
"I wanna go home!" She said as she began to do the whiney cry again when suddenly something plowed into her.
"Christina! I shall help you." She looked down to see who it was. And for some reason they had Pippin come back to help her.
"Um, that won't work. Since you are half my size!" She yelled.
Pippin was still on a rush from the coffee beans, but there was no way he could help her.
"Yes I can." He then kicked her knee and then grabbed her bag and ran down the mountain screaming.
Chistina rubbed her knee and then torn down after him. "How many times do I have to tell you not to touch my bag and don't hit me!"
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As the company walked back down the mountain, they all listen to Christina whine. They ignored it, until she threatened to start crying again.
"No! She cannot make that awful sound again!" Gimli said.
"Well would you like to go help her?" Gandalf asked.
"I'm not going to go help that witch!" Legolas said.
They all heard her start to whine and then they knew that something had to be done.
"Will she share her breakfast with me again if I help her?" Pippin suddenly asked them.
Aragorn looked at him and smiled devilishly. "Yes...I believe she will..."
"Yay!" Pippin yelled as he jumped out of Boromir's arm and then charged back up the hill screaming. "Yaaaaaaaaaaayy...Ou!" He suddenly ran into something and knew it was Christina.
~*~*~*~**~
"Are you sure that sending Pippin up to help Christina was a good idea?" Gandalf asked Aargorn over the wind.
"Come back here you little worm!" They heard Christina's voice shreek. And shortly behind it the, "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" scream of Pippin trying to get away from her.
Gandalf just rolled his eyes. "Come on now. We must be going."
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Pippin screamed as he ran right past Aragorn and Gandalf.
Christina quickly ran past them still chasing Pippin. She seemed to be picking stuff up as she was running and screaming at the hobbit.
"Does that girl ever calm down?" Gimli asked as the company began to move again.
"I would doubt it..." Legolas began. And then they heard Pippin's "AAAAAAHHHHH!" and the pounding of Christina's shoes circling around them. "I mean, have you seen the under garments she wears? It is just a little piece of cloth in the middle. She must have it caught up there and it causes her mood swings."
"How would you know what her under garments look like?" Boromir asked as the whole group suddenly stopped to look at the elf.
Legolas' face turned red. "She wears those low pants and it is my fault that she was bending over and I just happened to look at her." He then looked at all their confused faces. "Leave me alone." He then continued to walk on.
They continued to walk on, every now and then hearing the screaming of Pippin and then the threats from Christina. They finally escaped the snow storm towards the bottom, but they still trudged through the snow.
"AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Pippin ran through the line. And everyone cleared out of the way.
Christina was within arms grasp of him after they past Gandalf and she jumped at him tackling him face down to the ground.
"OU! She's hurting me...!" Pippin yelled as Christina grabbed his hair and beat his head on the ground over and over.
"You little verman! You took my bag! You kicked me!" Christina yelled.
"Merry! Sam! Frodo!" Pippin screamed. "Help me!"
Christina continously beat on him and then suddenly stopped. "Why is no one restraining me?" She asked aloud.
"Why is no one helping me?" Pippin asked sounding discouraged.
Both turned around to see the rest of the eight staring down at them, well actually it looked like they were intensly looking at Christina's butt..
"Yes?..." Christina asked slowly.
"The elf is right. She does have an under garment up her behind." Gimli said pointing at her pants.
Christina turned bright red as she stood up to pull up her pants. She didn't care about people seeing her thong, it was when they stared at her butt was when she got embarrassed. Damn hiphuggers.
"What is that?" Merry asked.
"A thong." Christina mumbled as she was still blushing.
"A thong?" Everyone echoed.
"Isn't it uncomfortable?" Aragorn asked.
"Why would you wear sure a thing?" Frodo asked.
"See I told you it was noticable!" Legolas told all of them.
"Hello!" Pippin yelled as he stood up and looked at everyone. They all looked at him, silent. "Doesn't anyone care that she just hit my head against the ground ten times?"
They all looked at him, and then one another, then back to Christina. And started back up with the questions.
"So who came up with such an invention?" Sam asked.
"Doesn't it bother you during the day?" Boromir asked.
"Okay! Enough!" Christina yelled. "Can we just move on!" As she pulled her pants up once more.
"Can we please pity the badly wounded hobbit!" Pippin begged pathictly.
"Oh shut up you big baby!" Christina said as she pushed him down again.
"Your always telling us to shut up, now I am going to tell you to shut up!" Merry suddenly came forth to say.
"Oh you think you are the little hobbit hero do you?!" Christina asked.
"Yes I suppose I do." He told her firmly. "So shut up."
Christina just looked at him. "You know what, if you can kick yourself in the head I will never tell you to shut up again." She smirked.
"And how am I suppoded to do that?" Merry asked.
"You figure it out." Christina challenged him.
"But I..." Merry began.
"Hey, you figure it out by tomorrow morning and I will never tell you to shut up again." Christina said.
"Fine." Merry said.
Christina turned to Gandalf. "Oh wise and fearless leader, please lead on." She said.
Gandalf took offense to the tone in her voice, but did not say anything, no one did, though Legolas did glare at her as he walked past her.
Christina continued to follow everyone. She noticed that Boromir was carrying Pippin. The caffine had worn off and he was now dead tired.
"My feet hurt! When are we going to stop!" Christina complained.
"Oh be quiet!" Legolas yelled at her.
"Hey elf boy maybe you could carry me." Christina said.
Legolas stopped at turned to her. "My name is not elf-boy."
"It is, if I say it is." Christina told him.
Legolas just rolled his eyes and continued to walk on. Christina followed, yelling at them. She really couldn't wait to stop and sleep, and maybe for once even eat something...gasp!
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Heehee. I am still laughing at the idea of Pippin eating coffee beans. Oh well. Review if you wish. Chapter four is coming soon (I hope) and now I am off to go eat. I'm starving!
Remember I own nothing from the Lord of the Rings books! Except for the idea of a prissy cheerleader in Middle Earth. So don't take it! And the character Christina belongs to me too.
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The next morning, Christina woke up last. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, the sun was coming up.
"Good morning." Sam greeted her.
Christina looked at him. He still had her headphones on his head. "Morning." She said. She then noticed that Frodo was cooking something, while everyone else was packing up the camp. Merry and Pippin were nowhere to be found, which scared her.
She stood up and reached into her bag for her hair brush and make-up bag. "This sucks. I'm tired, I look like crap...and now I have to walk again." She thought as she began to brush her hair.
"Would you like something to eat?" Frodo asked her as he sat down on the ground next to her.
"No thanks." She said. "I usually don't eat breakfast." She said.
"You don't?" Frodo asked. "My, you are nothing like Pippin."
"I wouldn't want to be like Pippin." Christina thought as she began to braid her hair.
Aragorn came over. "I would suggest you bundling up. We are going through a mountain pass, it may get cold for you with bare legs." He told her.
"Yeah, yeah..." Christina said. She then tyed a rubber band around the bottom of her braid and then went to look for her pants. "YES!" She screamed as she was digging in her bag.
"What is it?" Frodo asked. Everyone was looking at her as though she was crazy.
Christina looked at Frodo. "Could you possibly boil some water for me?" She asked.
Frodo nodded, and looking confused. But he got up and went over to the fire.
Christina went and changed into her jeans and baby tee which said, "Brat" on it behind some trees. Her uniform was so dirty, now she would have to have it dry-cleaned. Great, she hated spending money on that. But oh well. She pulled her Doc Martin boots out of her bag and laced them up before going back to the camp.
Frodo was at the fire with a pot of boiling water. Christina pulled out an instant coffee pack from her bag (a/n: kind of like a tea bag, but with coffee, cream, and sugar in it *I don't know if there is such a thing, but according to me, there is, and if not...the idea is MINE*).
Frodo put the boiling water in a cup and handed it to Christina. "Here you go. Is that enough water for you?"
Christina nodded. "Yes it is." She said. "Thank you so much." She then dropped her coffee pack into it and swirled it around.
Frodo watched her, curious as to watch she had put in the water. Merry and Pippin walked up by his side.
"What is she doing?" Pippin asked Frodo.
"I don't know..." Frodo answered. They continued to watch her, a little confused.
Christina took a sip of her coffee. Nice, hot Starbucks coffee in the morning was always a wonderful thing to have. She loved the smell, and inhaled it as she held the cup in her hand. She then noticed that Frodo and Pippin where staring at her.
"Yes?" She asked.
"What do you have in that cup that makes you so happy?" Pippin asked.
"My breakfast." Christina told him.
"Oh no...You said the word..." Frodo said.
Pippin's eyes grew big. "Breakfast?" He asked, then ran over to Christina and began pulling at her arm. "Would you be willing to share?"
Christina raised the cup above her head. "No I wouldn't." She said. "Stop jumping on me!"
Pippin stopped a minute. But then continued to pull at her arms. "Please. Just a little bit."
"Is there a problem here?" Gandalf asked.
Pippin stopped jumping. "She will not share her breakfast with me." He said.
Gandalf shook his head. "Christina...Pippin loves his breakfast. And lately, hasn't been getting his fill lately. It would mean a great deal to him if you share your own breakfast with him."
Christina rolled her eyes. "Alright..."
"Thank you. We shall be on the moving soon." He said. He then turned and walked away.
Pippin gave Christina a look that said, "You heard him". Christina then lowered her arms. She took the little tea/coffee pack out of her cup and handed it to him. "Here, suck on this..." She said. "That should teach him to want *my* breakfast." She thought.
Pippin looked at it, but then put it in his mouth. He began to suck on it, then shook his head. "This tastes funny." He said.
Christina just shrugged and walked away. She rolled up the blankets and put everything back in her bag.
Sam was helping her make room in her bag for everything when Merry and Aragorn came over to them.
"What have you done to Pippin?" Merry yelled.
Christina gave them a confused look as she zipped up her bag. "Excuse me? What did I do to Pippin...Your the one who disappeared with him for who knows how long...I'm a little lost."
"He is running around like mad. Gandalf said you shared your breakfast with him." Aragorn told her.
Christina shook her head. "What?" She asked. "Show me."
Aragorn and Merry led her over to where the rest of the companions where. And she did infact see Pippin running around and jumping up and down. Almost like someone pressed the fast forward button.
"Care to explain this?" Aragorn asked her.
Christina scoffed and kicked dirt at him. She then went over to Pippin and stopped him. "Pippin...Pippin! No...Stop jumping..." She said trying to get him to calm down. He finally did for a moment. "Pippin...That little packet I gave you...What did you do with it?"
"I ate it." He said.
"What?" She asked weakly hoping he didn't eat the coffee beans really.
"Yes, I torn it open and ate those little black things inside of the paper." He said. "I must say, it tastes quite bitter at first, but it is actually the best thing I have ever eaten. You must share your breakfast with me tomorrow." He said and then ran off, eventually tripping over something and falling on his face about five yards ahead. "I'm okay!" He then got up and continued to run around.
"Christina...What did he eat?" Gandalf asked her as she sat there in dismay.
"He ate coffee beans..." She said in dismay.
"Co-Fee beans?" Gandalf asked. "What are those?"
Christina sighed. "Well...they have a lot of caffine in them, and caffine gives you a lot of energy." She said. "Sort of."
"But you drank it...Why aren't you running a muck like he is?" Gandalf asked.
"Because, I drank it...He ate them..." Christina told him. "And I am used to having it."
"Well, I suppose we will not have to carry him today on our journey." Gandalf sighed. "But it will wear off, right. Oh please say yes."
"Yes...In a couple of hours." Christina said.
"Well, then let us be on our way." Gandalf said. "Pippin! Stop harrassing that bird!"
The nine companions, and Christina walked on the rest of the day. Soon, they were walking uphill in the snow. Christina was cold, but she kept walking. Pippin was having no problem plowing through the snow which came up to his knees.
"I can't believe this? Why didn't you bring horses? That would have made it much easier to get through this snow." Christina complained. She had fallen behind everyone, and was getting the feeling they wanted to leave her behind.
Christina noticed that Frodo tripped and Aragorn caught him. But Boromir picked something and was staring at it for quite some time, and then Aragorn demanded he give it back to Frodo.
Christina walked by them and noticed that Aragorn was eyeing Boromir and holding onto his sword as though he was about to fight Boromir. She rolled her eyes as she walked by. "Yeah thats nice. Defend the halfing and leave me at the bottom of the mountain for dead!" She yelled at him as she walked by. "You know, you must think that you all are soooo much better than women. And since I can't fend for myself, you think that I will be left all alone and somehow go back to New York. Well guess what. If I die, I will make sure I come back as a ghost to bring slow, painful deaths to all of you." She declared to all of them.
Christina walked ahead and ended up walking next to Gandalf. "I'm tired. When are we going to stop?" She whined.
"Not for quite some time. We have to get through this mountain pass no later than today." Gandalf answered, he then continued walking ahead of her.
"But I'm tired!" Christina yelled at her. "This isn't fun! I hate this and I want to go home!"
She then sat down on the snow covered ground. She was getting snow in her pants and shoes, but she didn't care. She wanted nothing more than to go home. It was then that she had a breakdown and cried as though she had just been dumped by her boyfriend.
Everyone in the company, excpet Pippin who was running around and eating snow, looked at Christina. Tears were pouring from her eyes and she was squealing (*Think of the break-up scene in Legally Blonde when Elle was crying*)
Aragorn stopped to comfort her. "Is something wrong?"
"Well duh! I want to go home. I'm tired and I'm hungry and I look awful. I want to go home! I miss my boyfriend. I miss my parents. I even miss my stupid brother!" She then began to squeal again.
"But you must calm down." He told her. "We still have a long way to go and crying isn't going to get you anywhere."
Christina looked at him. "We still have a long way to go?"
Aragorn nodded. "Yes."
"Oh no!" She wailed and then rolled over on her stomach and began kicking the ground as though a little kid would.
"Is there anything that will..." He then looked ahead at Pippin who was currently jumping off a rock ahead of them. Aragorn suddenly got an idea and ran ahead to get Pippin.
Pippin quickly climbed up the rock that was about six feet high and when he got to the top edge he jumped down and hit the ground with a thud. He then got up and shook her snow off him and yelled. "Again!" And ran around the climb up the rock.
Aragorn watched the hobbit fall off the rock again. When he fell, it looked as though Pippin really hurt himself. Aragorn ran to his side. "Pippin are you alright?"
Pippin shook the snow off of his head and then looked at Aragorn and yelled. "Again!"
Aragorn stopped him from climbing up the rock. "Pippin, did you enjoy the breakfast that Christina shared with you?"
"Oh yes very much!" The hobbit said trying to get up the rock.
"Well, Christina isn't looking right now so how about you go down there and just take some more from her bag." Aragorn said.
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Pippin yelled. He then ran down to Christina's bag, and noticed that Christina was still crying and making that awful noise. He then went over to her bag and opened it.
Sam and Frodo were trying to get Christina to calm down. Which made it just that easier for Pippin to get into her bag.
"But it won't be that hard." Sam told her.
"We could help you." Frodo offered.
Christina just continued to cry and squeal.
"Make the noise stop!" Legolas yelled covering his ears.
Christina looked up and then walked over and got up and got in his face. "Listen buddy...I'm not used to walking all day up hill. I'm tired. I need sleep..I..."
Legolas cut her off. "You need to wash those black lines off your face." He said.
"I can't! There is no water around for me to do so. Not like it matters. I have no cute guys to impress anyway." Christina said.
"Are you telling me that I am not 'cute' as you would say?" Legolas looked offended.
"Well yeah." Christina said. "I mean, not even Hanson had their hair so long."
"Hanson?" Legolas asked.
Christina just then dropped back onto the ground and began crying again. "Whats the point? I'm never going to get home and I'm never going to..." She then looked up and noticed that Pippin was going through her gym bag. She then jumped back up and charged at the hobbit. "PIIIIIIIIIPPPPIIIIIIIN!" Christina screamed as she ran at him.
Pippin finally found the coffee pack and ate the coffee beans out of it. He then noticed that Christina was running up the hill screaming. "Uh oh." He then picked up her bag and ran up the hill screaming. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
"You little! I hate you! I can't believe you went through my bag!" Christina yelled.
Pippin and Christina ran past everyone to the front of the line. Pippin was somehow was outrunning Christina quite well.
Aargorn smirked as he saw Christina chasing Pippin. "I knew that would work." He thought to himself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After hours of walking, and Christina and Pippin running. He finally gave up and gave her bag back. But when she caught him, she was too tired to hurt him, so she just took her bag back.
The wind picked up, and the snow was blowing in their faces. It was even colder than ever. Gandalf led the way, Aragorn and Boromir had to carry the hobbits through the snow, Gimli seemed to be having a bit of trouble walking through the waist deep snow, Legolas was somehow walking on the snow, and Christina was just dragging her bag through the snow behind everyone.
"Why do the hobbits get a free ride!" She yelled. "This is not far at all."
Suddenly, Christina ran into Boromir. "Hey wait, why did we stop?"
Boromir turned to her. "We are debating what to do. Saurman is trying to bring down the mountain."
Christina just looked at him confused. She then heard Gandalf yelling something into the wind. Then a huge pile of snow fell on top of all of them.
Christina acted as though she was swimming and pushed with her arms and jumped up. She looked around and everyone was already out of the snow mound and fighting. She didn't pay attention, she was more worried about the fact that she probably wasn't going to get back to New York, she was going to die of hypothermea (sp?).
"We shall go through the mines!" She heard Frodo yelled.
"Whatever we do can we get off this mountain!" Christina yelled (actually demanded) to all of them. They all turned to look at her, and she couldn't exactly see them, but it looked as though they all rolled her eyes.
"If we are to go through the mines, then yes we will be getting off this mountain." Gandalf told Christina as he was walking towards her. "Follow me."
Everyone turned and began following Gandalf down the mountain. But once again Christina lagged behind. She was tired and hungry enough as it was, but after chasing Pippin, it seemed as though all her energy had been drained and she just wanted to sit down and rest. But that was impossible.
"You know...If I were one of the hobbits you would carry me!" Christina continued to yell at them. "I hate you! I hate all of you! I want to go home!"
No one payed attention to her, but then an idea popped into her head.
"I'm going to cry again!" She yelled.
She could tell that they stopped to see if she was telling the truth. Ah the plan was working.
"I wanna go home!" She said as she began to do the whiney cry again when suddenly something plowed into her.
"Christina! I shall help you." She looked down to see who it was. And for some reason they had Pippin come back to help her.
"Um, that won't work. Since you are half my size!" She yelled.
Pippin was still on a rush from the coffee beans, but there was no way he could help her.
"Yes I can." He then kicked her knee and then grabbed her bag and ran down the mountain screaming.
Chistina rubbed her knee and then torn down after him. "How many times do I have to tell you not to touch my bag and don't hit me!"
~~~
As the company walked back down the mountain, they all listen to Christina whine. They ignored it, until she threatened to start crying again.
"No! She cannot make that awful sound again!" Gimli said.
"Well would you like to go help her?" Gandalf asked.
"I'm not going to go help that witch!" Legolas said.
They all heard her start to whine and then they knew that something had to be done.
"Will she share her breakfast with me again if I help her?" Pippin suddenly asked them.
Aragorn looked at him and smiled devilishly. "Yes...I believe she will..."
"Yay!" Pippin yelled as he jumped out of Boromir's arm and then charged back up the hill screaming. "Yaaaaaaaaaaayy...Ou!" He suddenly ran into something and knew it was Christina.
~*~*~*~**~
"Are you sure that sending Pippin up to help Christina was a good idea?" Gandalf asked Aargorn over the wind.
"Come back here you little worm!" They heard Christina's voice shreek. And shortly behind it the, "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" scream of Pippin trying to get away from her.
Gandalf just rolled his eyes. "Come on now. We must be going."
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Pippin screamed as he ran right past Aragorn and Gandalf.
Christina quickly ran past them still chasing Pippin. She seemed to be picking stuff up as she was running and screaming at the hobbit.
"Does that girl ever calm down?" Gimli asked as the company began to move again.
"I would doubt it..." Legolas began. And then they heard Pippin's "AAAAAAHHHHH!" and the pounding of Christina's shoes circling around them. "I mean, have you seen the under garments she wears? It is just a little piece of cloth in the middle. She must have it caught up there and it causes her mood swings."
"How would you know what her under garments look like?" Boromir asked as the whole group suddenly stopped to look at the elf.
Legolas' face turned red. "She wears those low pants and it is my fault that she was bending over and I just happened to look at her." He then looked at all their confused faces. "Leave me alone." He then continued to walk on.
They continued to walk on, every now and then hearing the screaming of Pippin and then the threats from Christina. They finally escaped the snow storm towards the bottom, but they still trudged through the snow.
"AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Pippin ran through the line. And everyone cleared out of the way.
Christina was within arms grasp of him after they past Gandalf and she jumped at him tackling him face down to the ground.
"OU! She's hurting me...!" Pippin yelled as Christina grabbed his hair and beat his head on the ground over and over.
"You little verman! You took my bag! You kicked me!" Christina yelled.
"Merry! Sam! Frodo!" Pippin screamed. "Help me!"
Christina continously beat on him and then suddenly stopped. "Why is no one restraining me?" She asked aloud.
"Why is no one helping me?" Pippin asked sounding discouraged.
Both turned around to see the rest of the eight staring down at them, well actually it looked like they were intensly looking at Christina's butt..
"Yes?..." Christina asked slowly.
"The elf is right. She does have an under garment up her behind." Gimli said pointing at her pants.
Christina turned bright red as she stood up to pull up her pants. She didn't care about people seeing her thong, it was when they stared at her butt was when she got embarrassed. Damn hiphuggers.
"What is that?" Merry asked.
"A thong." Christina mumbled as she was still blushing.
"A thong?" Everyone echoed.
"Isn't it uncomfortable?" Aragorn asked.
"Why would you wear sure a thing?" Frodo asked.
"See I told you it was noticable!" Legolas told all of them.
"Hello!" Pippin yelled as he stood up and looked at everyone. They all looked at him, silent. "Doesn't anyone care that she just hit my head against the ground ten times?"
They all looked at him, and then one another, then back to Christina. And started back up with the questions.
"So who came up with such an invention?" Sam asked.
"Doesn't it bother you during the day?" Boromir asked.
"Okay! Enough!" Christina yelled. "Can we just move on!" As she pulled her pants up once more.
"Can we please pity the badly wounded hobbit!" Pippin begged pathictly.
"Oh shut up you big baby!" Christina said as she pushed him down again.
"Your always telling us to shut up, now I am going to tell you to shut up!" Merry suddenly came forth to say.
"Oh you think you are the little hobbit hero do you?!" Christina asked.
"Yes I suppose I do." He told her firmly. "So shut up."
Christina just looked at him. "You know what, if you can kick yourself in the head I will never tell you to shut up again." She smirked.
"And how am I suppoded to do that?" Merry asked.
"You figure it out." Christina challenged him.
"But I..." Merry began.
"Hey, you figure it out by tomorrow morning and I will never tell you to shut up again." Christina said.
"Fine." Merry said.
Christina turned to Gandalf. "Oh wise and fearless leader, please lead on." She said.
Gandalf took offense to the tone in her voice, but did not say anything, no one did, though Legolas did glare at her as he walked past her.
Christina continued to follow everyone. She noticed that Boromir was carrying Pippin. The caffine had worn off and he was now dead tired.
"My feet hurt! When are we going to stop!" Christina complained.
"Oh be quiet!" Legolas yelled at her.
"Hey elf boy maybe you could carry me." Christina said.
Legolas stopped at turned to her. "My name is not elf-boy."
"It is, if I say it is." Christina told him.
Legolas just rolled his eyes and continued to walk on. Christina followed, yelling at them. She really couldn't wait to stop and sleep, and maybe for once even eat something...gasp!
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Heehee. I am still laughing at the idea of Pippin eating coffee beans. Oh well. Review if you wish. Chapter four is coming soon (I hope) and now I am off to go eat. I'm starving!
