Disclaimer: if pigs could fly… there'd probably be pigs everywhere… hmm… still haven't found those legal papers though… maybe the Veggie cleaned them up… hmm…

-=====-Harry Potter and the Secret Love Diaries -=====-

Chapter three – Villain?

Ron Weasley's Diary – Griffindor tower

                                       8:00 pm

                                       Beginning of term one

                                      6th year.

So yeah, I was looking for my potions book and I thought it might be under Harry's bed. So I had a look and found these black things. They must be some muggle thing so I sent them to dad and he sent back a message saying: "SEND ME MORE!!"

Weird…

Ron Weasley, gone potty

Draco's Diary – Slytherin common room.

                           8:00 pm

                            Beginning of term one

                            6th year.

Dear Holder of Devious Plans and Scary Secrets,

                                                                              I'm suspicious… Marcus Flint was staring at my butt, I mean, yeah, I have been working out and my butt cheeks are like buns of steel but… Marcus Flint?! Shit! He's as ugly as a mule's fanny!

I do love somebody!

Well, I'm torn between two people…

Hope I can decide soon…

Buns of Steel Boy, Draco

Mary-Sue's Diary – Hufflepuff common room.

                                8:00 pm

                                Beginning of term one

                                6th year.

DRACO IS A

SEX GOD!!!

Love, Mary-Sue (loves Draco)

Harry's Diary – Griffindor…. Urgh some other room!

                           8:00 pm

                           Beginning of term one

                           6th year.

DRACO IS A

SEX GOD!!!

Love Harry.

Ron Weasley's Diary – Griffindor bathroom

                                       9:00 pm

                                       Beginning of term one

                                       6th year.

There's a rumor going around that Draco is a Sex God… I wouldn't know. But he did look at me funny today, you know, did a weird eyebrow thing…Dad told me to send him more of those black things… but when I told him there were none left he sent me a howler…

Bizarre…

Ron, Signing out!

Voldemort's Diary – Evil lair (somewhere in the mountains).

                                  9:00 pm

                                  Beginning of term one

Dear Diary,

                  I am working for some chick. She wants me to kill James Potter's son. I love James. I want to kill his son because he's a symbol of James' straightness. I am still angry at myself for missing and killing James. Mary-Sue, the chick I'm working for, pays me sooooo much money. It's stupid… she's paying me money for something I was going to do for free… dumb girl… oh well, more money for me! I also love money…. But I love James more.

Hugs and Kisses (especially for James), Voldemort.

Will Ron's dad ever get more porn videos?

Will we find out who Draco's in love with?

Will Hermione ever come into this story?

Who knows?

Who cares?

But keep reading 'cause we want more money…. Not that we're getting any…. *whistles*