With You
Note: These characters and story is copyrighted to me. It's not nice to take people ideas and characters. Otherwise Enjoy!
Somehow I just knew it...once we met, it would never be the same. It was a kind of a funny beginning with Jonathan. I had just gotten through my first break-up with my boyfriend of almost 4 years. I had decided the only way I would get through my bitter break-up with Mark was to busy myself with things. Art, poetry, and writing were some of them. I had always fancied acting and was ready to try experimenting with it. I had studied texts and plays over the summer holiday before entering my third year at UNI. The first few days returning to UNI were tough because since a lot of my friends were friends with Mark none of them were talking to me. And my brother, who had been in a tough position, being my brother and Mark's best friend, he didn't know if he should talk to me about it or not. So I understood that all my friends (including Michael's girlfriend) said that it was my fault that Mark and I broke-up and as I had heard, left him broken hearted. Well what they hadn't realized is I did not break-up with him, we both just kind of let go of each other after years of being together nearly everyday. We just agreed that it would be best, but I was the one who came out and said it first, because I honestly didn't know where Mark and I were headed at the end of last semester.
And it was not like I was all happy about it either, I had a really tough time going through the breakup. I really didn't talk to my parents anymore, I hadn't really in a long time. So, I just became myself again, like those many years before Mark. I didn't really 'look around' for guys or a boyfriend anymore. What was the point? I didn't want to be in a hurry to start a new relationship. I just didn't feel right to 'go looking for love' when I had just lost my first boyfriend. But as soon as I would give up on love, it would find me again.
I had a few good classes in my third year at UNI. I took a few experimental theater classes and art studies in which, I would soon find out, Jonathan was in most of my classes. A mutual friend, I had met and talked with last year was also in my acting classes, Pete. His girlfriend, Sadie, was also in my art class with me. Sadie and I became really good friends only after a few weeks into the first semester. Pete and Sadie invited me to go with them to all these independent film festivals, which I didn't know at the time, that Jonathan had shown some films at the festival. Then Pete, one day out of the blue, came up to me after class and just tried to, casually, ask me what kind of stuff I did in my spare time, what music and movies do I like, and stuff like that. I was really shy about telling him this because I already knew this information was not for him. After I was finished, I asked him why did he just ask me all these questions. And Pete just quickly tried to ignore the question but I stared him down and then he said it was for one of his friends (and I knew Pete only had a few friends so that was my first clue). I freaked out and begged him to tell me who it was. But Pete said his friend doesn't want you to find out.not yet at least. This totally shocked me, because it was like only 2 months into the semester and someone was interested. After Mark and I broke up, I swore that I wouldn't want to get involved with anyone, and I really didn't talk to anyone in my other classes. I usually would listening to lectures, but would get bored and would draw.
When Pete told me that, I still couldn't believe it. That night I ruled out that the person had to be in one of my classes. So the next day I was looking at all the faces in all of my classes.but I had a feeling that he was in my English class but he was hiding. I have to laugh at this because as soon as class was let out, I was gathering my stuff when Jonathan passed by. I remembered he was in my art classes and acting classes too. And I just had one of those feelings. He looked like he was one of Pete's close friends, though I couldn't be sure. Jonathan had that poet/writer look on him. Very appealing if you ask me. In acting class I was especially on the suspicious side that it was Jonathan because even though Pete thought I would never see them talking backstage, I had. I immediately went up to Sadie and asked her if Pete had told her anything about what he told me the other day. And she just kind of smiled and nodded. I just asked her if she knew who it was that was interested but she just smiled and didn't say anything. Though she didn't even know that I had seen Jonathan and Pete talking just a few minutes ago.
After class I went to the JavaBean, a local coffee house near UNI, to start working on some assignments. I don't usually pay attention to the students in there but I had an odd feeling that I should today. But if it was Jonathan then how would he know where I go to do my homework. Unless Pete or Sadie told him. I was typing up a research paper when Jonathan came in.
I saw him from the corner of the coffee house. He went up to the counter and ordered some coffee and as he was waiting he glanced around the coffee house. I quickly went back to typing, but I felt his eyes on me. I tried not to laugh or smile but just acted like I was really into typing out this research paper. He got his coffee and sat down at a table that was straight across the way from where I was sitting. He got out his books and notebooks and began to write. Though by the looks of it, he was writing poems or stories. Every once and awhile he would glance up from his work and look around and then would took towards me. I kind of would do the same thing. I knew I wouldn't move from this spot because it was such a good view. After all he was really, really cute. But I wouldn't just base everything on looks, sometimes it's also what is inside a guy that really matters. He sat there, writing away, noticing or not noticing me looking at him from time to time. I never thought I would say this but he looked sexy just sitting there and writing away, his black-brown hair falling over his eyes, his light brown eyes concentrated on his work, if he was thinking, his hand would come up and he would rub his unshaven face for a few and then go back to writing again. I soon had to laugh or get out of there because I was going to start smiling if he looked over at me on more time.
I then remembered I was going to meet my parents at Barron's for supper. I slowly gathered up my stuff, because I didn't want it to look like I was running off. And I made sure he saw me check my watch and then I walked past him (I felt a vibe), and walked out of the JavaBean and out to my car. I gave a ring to my parents to tell them I would be a little late meeting them. Little did I know that Jonathan was talking to Pete (on his cell) as I drove away.
I had a good dinner with my parents that day. I listened to them talk about how Michael was doing, and other stuff, but my mind was on him. I kept wondering if he was thinking about me, even though we had never met nor talked before. This had to be the beginning of something good. As I kept thinking of him as I drove back to the dorms I remembered I was doing this scene with him in acting class, and the way he looked at me when we were doing the scene together just made me feel something towards him. When I got back to my room. I rang Pete up and asked him if he would now tell me who it is, but he refused. I told him that I know who it was, and Pete asked who it was, but I didn't answer him, I just told him that he should make sure he was alone with his friend before talking about me, especially in acting class. He just was silent for a minute and said, "Oh.crap." and I said I would talk to him tomorrow. I then watched a movie and read until I felt to go to sleep. I didn't fall to sleep until around three in the morning.
The next morning I got up and got ready for class. I had forgot that Jonathan was going to be there also. I tried not to look at him during the lecture but I even caught him a few times looking at me then when I would look up, he would look away. I had forgotten that I had left my cell phone on, and then Pete text messaged me. He just asked me what I was up to and I told him that I was really bored and stuff. Then Pete said the weirdest thing, he said that I looked really bored but beautiful and poetic sitting in my chair. I then told Pete that first he wasn't at this lecture and second that he had a girlfriend. But he said that he wasn't Pete. and he didn't have a girlfriend either. I was so taken aback that I almost dropped my phone, but caught it just in time. Then I asked who was he if he wasn't Pete. But he said to call him "Neo" for now. I then looked around the lecture hall and then he said that I would never find out who he is because Pete nor Sadie would never tell and he was not about to come up to me and tell me. I asked him if the reason I don't know who he is because he's really shy.
In which "Neo" said that he was very shy. I then said that he could have just came up to me in the JavaBean and asked me for my email address and we could just talk online. As soon as I sent that text, I looked over at Jonathan. He's such a sly and cleaver person because he just acted like he was taking notes and he knew I was looking at him. I stared at him for about 3 minutes to see if he would break but he didn't. God, he's really good, then again he is taking an acting class. Then I paid attention to the professor for a few minutes and took some more notes. Then he said that I would never guess who was, and even if I did he nor Pete or Sadie would tell me if it was him or not. Then I told him that I have my own ways of finding out things when other people aren't paying attention, I pick up on things he nor Pete would guess I notice. I said for example the way he looks at me when he thinks I am not looking at him. Then he asked to tell me (if I thought I knew) what his name was. But before I had a chance to, the lecture let out. Then I just remembered that I have acting class and art today too. Oh this should be fun. Then I looked back on my cell phone as I was walking back to the dorm, in which "Neo" was still on and waiting for my reply. I hesitated a bit and then he said that if I was hesitant than he could just wait till later or something.
I said that would be fine, Jonathan! and then clicked off. I went back to my room and had to just recall what had just happened. I smiled, sighed, and turned on some music and rested before I had to go to art class. I must have dosed off because the sound of my cell phone ringing woke me up. I answered it and it was Sadie. She asked if I had planned to skip art class or did I just forget. I quickly glanced at my watch and said, "Shit! I over slept!" and then she said that I didn't miss anything and since I am already almost done with my painting that I didn't have to be there today but she also said that "Neo" missed you in art class today. I just giggled and said I would talk to her later.
I got up and refreshed myself and headed towards acting class. On the way to class, it hit me. You know, getting nervous and stuff. What if we have to do a scene together? I don't think I would be able to concentrate long enough with him up on stage with me. I got to the theatre building and took a deep breath and went in. Only when I got in, Jonathan hadn't arrived yet. Phew. Sadie and Pete were already there, sitting together and talking. When they saw me come in, they waved and smiled as I came over to sit with them. I looked at both of them, laughed and shook my head. Pete asked, with a smile, if I had a good conversation with "Neo". I smiled and said you could just use his name. Then Pete gave me a sly look because he was trying to see if I was tricking him to say Jonathan's name or if Jonathan had told me it was him. He was about ready to say something when our professor came in and started talking. She said that we wouldn't be doing any scenes today because he had something important to announce. I looked around for Jonathan and spotted him directly across from me and on the other side of the auditorium. He, at first, was paying attention to our professor, but then he looked over at me.
I nodded and smiled at him and he smiled and nodded back (but the smile was an intense smile). We must have been looking at each other for a while because Sadie nudged me to pay attention soon after. Turns out, the first of the four plays UNI will be putting on this year is going to be Chicago and she wants us to all audition. I thought I would audition and to see if I was good enough to get a part. Pete and Sadie I am a really good actress, but I thought Chicago would be interesting to try out my singing skills too and plus it's one of my favorite musicals. After she was done she dismissed us early and told everyone what day the auditions would be held. I made sure Jonathan left before me. There I was almost 21 years old, and I still get the nervous crap like I was still 16. I told Pete and Sadie that I might not go to the movies with them tonight because I felt a migraine coming. Sadie said that she hoped it passed and that if my migraine passed and I still wanted to come to the movie that I could just give her a call and she'd pick me up. "Ok." I said and smiled. And then headed towards the library to do look up some books. It was a bad idea considering I had a migraine now.
But I went in and looked for a few books. Then my migraine got really bad, so I left and went back to my dorm room. The migraine hurt so bad I just wanted it to go away. I took aspirin and laid down, but didn't fall asleep. After about two hours of lying down I heard my cell phone ring, I slowly answered it and said, "I am not any better than I was 2 hours ago, Sadie. So I wont be able to come." A voice on the other end said, "Umm, well I am sorry you don't feel well Emily but this is not Sadie.It's Jonathan." I just slowly, in awe, said "What?!" He sort of laughed and said, "It's Neo." I smiled to myself and said, "I know it's you, but how did you get my number? Oh, wait, let me guess.Pete gave it you?" "Yes, he did. Was that ok?" "Yeah that was fine. I actually have been wanting to talk to you for awhile now." "Oh really?" he asked amazed. I smiled and said, "Yeah...are you going to audition for Chicago?" He said, "I don't know yet. I might. Are you going to?" "I don't know either. I want to but I don't know if I am that good." "You are really good. I mean that Emily." "Thanks Jonathan. You are really good too." "Thanks. But, I'll let you go, since you aren't feeling well and aren't coming to the movie tonight." He said. "Oh, you are going tonight with Sadie and Pete?" "Yeah. Not really my thing, but I thought you might come so yeah I am still going." "Hmmm.I think my migraine is going to go away, and I think I might come." "Well, you don't have to come even if I am. You should rest cause you look like you've not really gotten much sleep lately." "You looked really tired yourself." "Ah well, that's my life. Late nights. Early mornings." "Same here. Well, I think I am going to rest tonight. Have fun at the movies and sorry I couldn't come and see you. Give me a call when you get back if you want. I'll be up." I said, smiling. I could tell he was smiling, "Ok. Well hopefully you will get better. And I will talk to you later." "Thanks. Talk to you later" "Bye.." Then we hung up. Wow. I had to collect myself and just review what had just happened. I am surprised he wasn't that shy about calling me, I guess he really is interested in me. I wonder what kind of stuff he writes. I still write a lot of poetry and short stories still. I checked my clock, it was 9:00 pm when I had gotten of the phone with Jonathan. I still couldn't believe he just called and talked to me. Wow. My migraine was still there but I was too happy now to notice. I turned on some music to get me to fall asleep, which helped because I went to sleep soon after. I woke up the next morning thinking of Jonathan. I had forgot he said he was going to call me last night. I checked my messages on my cell, in which there was one from him. Jonathan, sounding tired, just said that he would give me a call tomorrow (meaning today) since he guessed that I was asleep and he didn't want to wake me. I took a shower, got dressed, and went back into my room. Not long after, I heard a knock at my door. I opened it to find Suz, my best friend who decided not to talk to me since I broken up with Mark, and who I have seen for like five months. I looked at her, with a vacant expression on my face. She looked confused about something. She looked at me and said, "I don't know, I need someone to talk to." I could tell she was on the verge of tears. I let her in and shut my door, she sat down in my chair by the computer, and just shook her head. "Suz..what is it?" I asked with deep concern. I mean, after all she was my friend. She shook her head. "I.", she choked up and said, "I'm pregnant." My mouth literally dropped and I moved over to sit on my bed across from her. I handed her a tissue. She said thanks. I then just shook my head and said, "..God I don't know what to say.first, let me ask you, is it my brother's?" She nodded. Then she looked up at me. "But we used protection and were so careful, I still don't see how I could have.." I nodded and listened to her basically tell me how she knew that she was pregnant and how she was afraid to tell Michael. I kept thinking how much Suz hasn't changed since the first years I met her. She still is innocent and didn't realize things like getting pregnant and stuff happens every day. I told her all about even if Michael and her used protection and was careful she could have still gotten pregnant. She started crying and said she didn't know if she should tell Michael or break up with him, or what. I told her that yes, he should know, but have me tell him. She asked if I would really do that for her and I answered I would, since he might take it just a tad bit better from his sister than his girlfriend. I asked her if she had a specific time or day she wanted me to tell him. She said as soon as possible. She was not crying anymore, so that was actually good because I thought for sure my next question was going to make her start crying again. I asked her how many weeks along in the pregnancy was she and was she planning on keeping it. She said that she was about four or five weeks (that's what the doctor said) and said she had decided to keep the child even if Michael decided to break up with her. I looked at her and then gave her a long hug. I told her she could stay here for a while if she didn't want to go back to her dorm. She said she would for a few days if that was ok. I said it was fine. I thought for a long time and said that I would call my brother tonight and ask him to meet me for breakfast tomorrow, since, after all, it was the weekend. I was just getting ready to email Michael when my cell rang. I answered it, forgetting that Jonathan said he was going to call me today. I was so happy when I heard his voice that I completely forgot Suz was in the room, but I noticed she was kind of listening in, so I stepped out into the hallway and walked over to the lounge. Jonathan asked if I was feeling better and stuff. I asked him how was the movie and if he was tired today. He said that the movie was pretty good and that he was not as tired as he has been lately. I asked him to do me a favor. He said he would do whatever I asked. I smiled and asked him to go to Pete's dorm and tell Pete that I need to talk to you both of you. He got really serious and said, "Why? Is something wrong? Are you in trouble?" I said calmly, "No, no, nothing like that. I just need your guys help and advice.' "Oh. Ok. Yeah, I'll be right over." He said. "Great. Thanks." I said. "No problem. See you in a few." "Bye." "Bye.." I said and smiled sitting a lounge chair.
I went back to my dorm room and told Suz that everything is going to be taken care of. She said she was very thankful that I was helping her. I told her I had to leave to go take care of something and that I would be back in about an hour and she could just hang out here and watch a movie. I also told her that if anyone called or stopped by, she didn't have to answer either one. She said that she really appreciated my help. I said it was no problem since I still considered her my friend. I then grabbed my cell and headed towards Pete's dorm. It was a short walk but on my way there I thought to myself. Why the hell had I called Jonathan also? I don't know him that well but maybe because I just wanted his advice also because sometimes Pete can give me weird and not that good of advice. God, I hope Jonathan doesn't think that I asked him to come over to Pete's because I just wanted to see him or something like that. I don't know. As I was thinking about all this new crap I had to deal with, my cell phone rang. I answered it, just as I was in front of Pete's building, and as soon as I said "hello?" I knew who it was, it was Michael.
"Emily?" he said.
"Yes.."
"Hey, it's Michael."
"Oh hey!."
"How ya been?"
"Alright. How you been?"
"Fine. Listen, um, have you seen or heard from Suz lately?"
I paused and decided not to tell him that I had just talk to her. "Um.not recently. I mean the last time I saw her was last May. Why? What happened?"
"Well, that's the thing. I don't know. She hasn't talked to me in a few weeks and hasn't answered any of my messages."
I felt bad now, I felt so bad lying to my brother. I had never heard this worried tone in his voice ever before. I quickly said, "Well, Michael, she could be really busy you know. But, listen sorry to cut this short, but I am late for a lecture. If you want I can or you can call me later or we can meet for breakfast tomorrow since my only class tomorrow is in the afternoon."
"Ok. I will probably call you later on."
He sounded really sad.
I quickly said "Cheer up and don't worry." as I headed up the stairs to Pete's dorm.
"Ok. Later."
"Bye."
Thank god that was over. I made it to Pete's dorm and knocked on the door. Jonathan answered, god, he looked so.. Pete was there too. I went in and Jonathan, who offered me his chair, but I said I was fine. I sat down on the floor, and then Jonathan gave me a lovely smile. Both Pete and Jonathan were silently looking at me to start talking. I quickly gave them the run down about what all was happening between my brother and Suz. I asked them how should I tell Michael and when, etc. Both Pete and Jonathan thought for a minute and Jonathan was the first to tell me what he thought I should do:
"Basically you have to tell your brother the truth and just flat out tell him that his girlfriend is pregnant and as soon as possible. Even if he doesn't take it nicely, he still would probably rather hear it from you than anyone else." Then we held each other gaze for a few, and then I broke away and asked Pete if he had anything to say. Pete said pretty much the same thing as Jonathan. I told them thanks for their help and left. I stood outside Pete's building for a few minutes and took a deep breath. I went and sat under an oak tree and pulled out one of my notebooks from my bag and began writing when my cell rang.
It was Jonathan. "Hey" he said.
"Hey. What do you want? I just left you."
"Oh, I was just wondering.um....if you are feeling better about the situation since you talked to us?"
"Yes. I'm fine..that's not why you called is it?" I asked.
"Um..",
" No.." he said. Then before I knew it, there he was, standing right in front of me.
We just looked on each other, he standing in front of me and me sitting on the ground, both on our cell phones. It was dead silence for a few minutes before I jokingly told him on my cell, "I'll have to call you back." And then I hung up. He smiled and held out his hands for me to take. Hold my hand and we're halfway there. I put my stuff back in my bag and took his hand to help me up. He helped me up and then we started walking and talking. All that fear and crap we had about talking to each other went away. We talked about a lot of things, we just started talking about the theatre and before we knew it we had walked nearly all around campus and it was 5 o'clock. We didn't even realize it until we were by the JavaBean and we had decided to go inside.
What didn't we didn't talk about in those hours walking we talked about in the JavaBean. Again, before we knew it it was like 9 pm and closing time. We then found a bench to sit on and continued talking. With a few streetlights to give us some light, he asked me, "Can I ask you a kind of personal question?"
"Sure." I said.
"Have you ever had a boyfriend?"
"Yes.once.you want the full version or the brief."
Jonathan checked his watch. "If it's alright..full version."
I smiled and said, "Sure."
So, I told him the whole history of Mark and me. He actually listened to me and I felt really comfortable around him I mean I didn't even leave one thing about Mark and mine relationship. After I was done he just shook his head and said, "Wow.."
"Yeah." I said.
"Wait..you don't mean Mark Daniels do you?"
I nodded.
"Oh, yeah he's in my dorm and in my Russian Lit. class."
"Ah.." I said and nodded.
"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" I asked looking at him.
He looked at me and then looked across the street. "Yes..once..." he said with a sadness in a voice.
"Oh, hey Jonathan, you don't have to tell me about it, sorry I brought it up."
"No, it's ok.." He stared off down the street and closed his eyes for a second and then looked at me, ".she died..in my arms...three years ago."
"God.I am so sorry." I said with sympathy.
"Do you want to know what happened?" he asked looking back at me.
I said only if he wanted to tell me. He nodded and rubbed his eyes.
"Alright.I would have been five years ago, when I was sixteen, when I met Elizabeth.." He looked off into the distance, remembering how the story began. " I was only sixteen and she had just turned sixteen when I first saw her. Actually I saw her at school a few times and didn't realize she was on of my sister's friends. Not until she came over one day to help my sister, Anne, with a project. My sister introduced me and stuff. I guess you could say it began as a friendship which during the course of that year would develop into a love relationship.." He looked down at his hands probably trying to remember everything. I said, "Again, Jonathan, if you want to stop you can."
"No, it's alright..I was just thinking.." He looked at me and then back across the street. He continued, "I don't really know how it happened. It just happened, ya know. She had come over one day, when my sister wasn't home (she had planned this, she later told me). And we were sitting on the couch when I decided to kiss her. From that moment on we knew we would never be the same again. The brief this up, we were together for almost two years, two amazing years.before it happened." he said with pain and sadness in his voice. I was still looking at him with sadness as he continued, "It was that year of that really bad ice storm." I nodded, remembering. "We were sitting in this little restaurant and she wanted to go get me something for my birthday since she hadn't had time to. She went across the icy street to a bookshop and I had stayed and paid for the food. I heard breaks screeching and somehow I knew something bad had happened. I ran outside and looked over to my left.and there was Elizabeth..pined between a light pole and this person's car. I would later find out that he came along driving and spilled coffee and didn't see Liz cross the street and slammed on the breaks to try and stop but the road was so slick that he accidentally hit her. I was such in shock, horror as I ran as fast as I could to her. She saw me coming and even through her pain she smiled. I didn't know what to do, the driver and a few people were around, they had called an ambulance and were staring in horror, all I knew is I wanted her unpinned from that pole. She wasn't that badly pinned between the pole and the car, but still it hurt her more when we finally got her out. Me and two other people who were nearby laid her down on the sidewalk and waited for the ambulance to come. I took her in my arms, I could tell she was in a lot of pain, but she tried not to show it. I still could not believe this was happening, I kept praying that it was a dream. I kept my focus on Liz. She looked at me and smiled again. I started to cry silently seeing her smile through the unimaginable pain she was having. I still remember our last words to each other. As I said, I had started to cry, and she told me, she said, " Jonathan." she slowly and weakly had raised her fingers to caress my check and then she close her eyes because the pain was so much. She opened them again, but now they were filled with tears. "Jonathan." I smiled at her and wiped my tears away. ".I love you...I don't think you know how much I love you...you were and still are the best thing that has ever happened to me.." she said starting to feel the pain more and more. I started crying again and said, "Liz don't do this.you are going to make it. Come on, you can make it, you aren't giving up that easily." "My time is done, Jonathan. I don't think I will get into the ambulance today..maybe tomorrow." I stroked her hair and smiled through my tears. "Yes..maybe tomorrow. Elizabeth, you are my life, don't leave me now. Don't leave me all alone." I said to her. She smiled and said, " Tell my parents.that I thank them for my life and they meant so much to me..and Jonathan..." she started crying and I started hearing the ambulance siren. "Come on stay with me Liz.don't do this.for God's sake please." She looked back up at me and said, "I love you.." And with her last breath she whispered, "don't worry..you have your life, fate made me leave....you this way..do one thing....live...love..." And then she passed away. I knew she was gone and lowered my head and kissed her lips for the last time. I held her until the ambulance came. After that I stood in the spot where she had been lying for what seemed like an eternity but was only a couple of hours. I silently went back to restaurant and paid for our meal. I went back to our table to get my coat and I had found one of Elizabeth's books laying on the table with her bookmark still in place. I was still in utter shock. It wouldn't hit me until later that she was truly gone and was never coming back. I went and put my coat on and walked past the scene where she had died. I walked at least a mile until I reached her parents house. With teary eyes I told Elizabeth's mother what happened. I heard her mother tell her father when he came home from work that day. It hurt so much to tell her parents and her older sister what Elizabeth's last words were...I don't even know how I got through that, let alone her family..." After he was done, I saw Jonathan look away from me for a few minutes. I just didn't know what to say. I had never experienced loss like he had before. I didn't know if should hug him, talk to him, or what. We were sitting pretty close together, so I took his hand, in which he looked back over towards me. But he took his hand away from mine and moved some of my hair away from my face and caressed my cheek. Then we slowly kissed. It wasn't pity, sadness for him, or anything like that that made me continue to kiss him under that October moon. It was falling in love.. After a nice long (but not too long) kiss, Jonathan pulled me close and said, "I thought I had forgotten how to do that." and then just kind of laughed and I smiled. Then he suggested that we should start heading back to our dorms since it was almost 11:30. We saw a few people and professors walking around, but that was usual at UNI at this time. I as we were walking I asked him which building did he lived in and coincidently he live just a few blocks away from my building. Then he asked if it would be alright if he walked me to the door and I said, "That would be nice.." and smiled warmly at him. He smiled back and we headed towards the main door that lead to the dorms. We slowly faced each other and gazing at each other. He looked away for a second and then looked back and me and said, "So...". I smiled and said, "Yep.." He then slowly leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. I kind of nuzzled him then gave him a kiss on his cheek. After a brief nuzzle, he smiled back at me and said , "Well, I guess I will see you tomorrow." I smiled at him and said, "Yes. Until then." Then Jonathan, not breaking eye contact with me, slowly started walking off and let go of my hand as he left. I'll never let go. I then quickly went inside and slowly walked up to my dorm room. Wow, what an amazing night that was. I was pretty tired when I got in my dorm, I had totally forgotten Suz was there, but she was asleep on my floor. I quietly got ready for bed and laid down in my bed. I slowly tried to think of what all I did today and tried to think of some of the things we talked about as I drifted off to sleep.
I woke up that morning remembering that last little moment between Jonathan and I last night. I rubbed my eyes and remembered I still had to tell Michael about Suz. I sighed and thought about how much I couldn't wait to see Jonathan again. I got some clothes and went and took a shower. When I got back Suz was awake and it was almost 8:00. I asked if she needed to get refreshed or anything and she said she just wanted to take a shower and then would head back to her dorm. I gave her a towel and while she was away I called Michael and arranged to meet him at the JavaBean at 8:30. When Suz came back in I told her that I was meeting Michael at 8:30 to tell him. She just sighed and said , "Alright.". Then she said she had to go back to her dorm and get ready for her class and she thanked me for everything. I told her that everything would be fine and it would work out. She smiled and said thanks again and headed out of the room. I gathered my bag and coat, not thinking of putting any make-up or anything on and not remembering I had my English class at 11 and went downstairs and walked towards the JavaBean. I arrive there with about ten minutes before 8:30. I sat down at a table and waited for Michael. I checked messages on my cell phone but there wasn't any from Jonathan or Pete. It was quiet a little too quiet if you ask me. Just as I got my chai and was reading over some lecture notes, Michael walked in, looking like shit. I waved at him and put on a weak smile trying not to notice how bad he looked. He looked like he hadn't slept in a few days and hadn't shaved in a few days at that. I really didn't know how to start this conversation, but first I offered to buy Michael some coffee, but he refused. After a few seconds of silence, Michael started talking about Suz and the apparent problem he was noticing in her behavior. After about halfway through, I finally stopped Michael and said , "Look, Michael! Stop this..I do know something. Something that you should know. Suz came to me yesterday." Michael cut me off, "She did!!?!?! How was she? Was she alright?" I nodded and said , " Yes..she's fine. But um, the reason I met you hear is because...because, well..Michael, Suz is pregnant." Michael's expression totally changed from worried to I-cant-believe-it expression. I looked him in the eyes when I said it so he knew I wasn't lying. Michael put his hand to his forehead and rubbed it. Michael said, still trying to realize how this event is going to impact him, said, "I think I am getting a headache." I didn't say anything. I gave him some aspirin that I got from my bag and gave it to him with some of my chai. "Thanks." He said with a smile. Then his smile faded and he said, "..Is it mine?.." I nodded and said, "Yes." Michael ran his fingers through his hair. I suddenly remembered a memory back when I was like sixteen, of Michael and I talking in his room. 'Nothing will change Emily, not between us.and that's a promise.' I took his hand and said, "Look at me Michael, tell me what you are thinking." Michael's blue eyes slowly met mine and then he sighed and said, "I.I don't know what to do. What's Suz doing? I mean, ya know, is she keeping it and why didn't she just tell me? And how pregnant is she?" "She was so afraid to tell you.and she wants you to know that she's going to keep it and if you don't want to be apart of it and wanted to walk away, you could. She's about four or five weeks into the pregnancy.." Michael pulled his hand away, looked across the room, and smiled, a warm smiled. Then looked back at me and said, "Like hell I am NOT going to walk away. Is she nuts? I mean I was going to give her this on her birthday day in January. But." Michael took from his pocket, a small ring, which I am guessing is an engagement ring. I looked wide eyed at him, he was smiling and said, "Where is she now?" "Um..she said she was going to go back to her dorm and get ready for class." I said starting to smile.
"Good," Michael said, getting up and glancing at his watch. "..I have some time to catch her.." He walked over to me and have me a small smooch on the cheek and said, "Thanks for telling me, Em. You are the best.and hey we need to catch up some more later.."
I smiled and said, "Yeah..ok." I waved bye and watched Michael quickly set off to go to Suz's dorm. I had to laugh at myself because I thought Michael would react differently than how he did. I smiled and thought of Jonathan. I checked my watch and went to my first class. As I was walking towards my English lesson, I was thinking what was Jonathan doing right now and remembered his soft kiss from the other night.
Note: These characters and story is copyrighted to me. It's not nice to take people ideas and characters. Otherwise Enjoy!
Somehow I just knew it...once we met, it would never be the same. It was a kind of a funny beginning with Jonathan. I had just gotten through my first break-up with my boyfriend of almost 4 years. I had decided the only way I would get through my bitter break-up with Mark was to busy myself with things. Art, poetry, and writing were some of them. I had always fancied acting and was ready to try experimenting with it. I had studied texts and plays over the summer holiday before entering my third year at UNI. The first few days returning to UNI were tough because since a lot of my friends were friends with Mark none of them were talking to me. And my brother, who had been in a tough position, being my brother and Mark's best friend, he didn't know if he should talk to me about it or not. So I understood that all my friends (including Michael's girlfriend) said that it was my fault that Mark and I broke-up and as I had heard, left him broken hearted. Well what they hadn't realized is I did not break-up with him, we both just kind of let go of each other after years of being together nearly everyday. We just agreed that it would be best, but I was the one who came out and said it first, because I honestly didn't know where Mark and I were headed at the end of last semester.
And it was not like I was all happy about it either, I had a really tough time going through the breakup. I really didn't talk to my parents anymore, I hadn't really in a long time. So, I just became myself again, like those many years before Mark. I didn't really 'look around' for guys or a boyfriend anymore. What was the point? I didn't want to be in a hurry to start a new relationship. I just didn't feel right to 'go looking for love' when I had just lost my first boyfriend. But as soon as I would give up on love, it would find me again.
I had a few good classes in my third year at UNI. I took a few experimental theater classes and art studies in which, I would soon find out, Jonathan was in most of my classes. A mutual friend, I had met and talked with last year was also in my acting classes, Pete. His girlfriend, Sadie, was also in my art class with me. Sadie and I became really good friends only after a few weeks into the first semester. Pete and Sadie invited me to go with them to all these independent film festivals, which I didn't know at the time, that Jonathan had shown some films at the festival. Then Pete, one day out of the blue, came up to me after class and just tried to, casually, ask me what kind of stuff I did in my spare time, what music and movies do I like, and stuff like that. I was really shy about telling him this because I already knew this information was not for him. After I was finished, I asked him why did he just ask me all these questions. And Pete just quickly tried to ignore the question but I stared him down and then he said it was for one of his friends (and I knew Pete only had a few friends so that was my first clue). I freaked out and begged him to tell me who it was. But Pete said his friend doesn't want you to find out.not yet at least. This totally shocked me, because it was like only 2 months into the semester and someone was interested. After Mark and I broke up, I swore that I wouldn't want to get involved with anyone, and I really didn't talk to anyone in my other classes. I usually would listening to lectures, but would get bored and would draw.
When Pete told me that, I still couldn't believe it. That night I ruled out that the person had to be in one of my classes. So the next day I was looking at all the faces in all of my classes.but I had a feeling that he was in my English class but he was hiding. I have to laugh at this because as soon as class was let out, I was gathering my stuff when Jonathan passed by. I remembered he was in my art classes and acting classes too. And I just had one of those feelings. He looked like he was one of Pete's close friends, though I couldn't be sure. Jonathan had that poet/writer look on him. Very appealing if you ask me. In acting class I was especially on the suspicious side that it was Jonathan because even though Pete thought I would never see them talking backstage, I had. I immediately went up to Sadie and asked her if Pete had told her anything about what he told me the other day. And she just kind of smiled and nodded. I just asked her if she knew who it was that was interested but she just smiled and didn't say anything. Though she didn't even know that I had seen Jonathan and Pete talking just a few minutes ago.
After class I went to the JavaBean, a local coffee house near UNI, to start working on some assignments. I don't usually pay attention to the students in there but I had an odd feeling that I should today. But if it was Jonathan then how would he know where I go to do my homework. Unless Pete or Sadie told him. I was typing up a research paper when Jonathan came in.
I saw him from the corner of the coffee house. He went up to the counter and ordered some coffee and as he was waiting he glanced around the coffee house. I quickly went back to typing, but I felt his eyes on me. I tried not to laugh or smile but just acted like I was really into typing out this research paper. He got his coffee and sat down at a table that was straight across the way from where I was sitting. He got out his books and notebooks and began to write. Though by the looks of it, he was writing poems or stories. Every once and awhile he would glance up from his work and look around and then would took towards me. I kind of would do the same thing. I knew I wouldn't move from this spot because it was such a good view. After all he was really, really cute. But I wouldn't just base everything on looks, sometimes it's also what is inside a guy that really matters. He sat there, writing away, noticing or not noticing me looking at him from time to time. I never thought I would say this but he looked sexy just sitting there and writing away, his black-brown hair falling over his eyes, his light brown eyes concentrated on his work, if he was thinking, his hand would come up and he would rub his unshaven face for a few and then go back to writing again. I soon had to laugh or get out of there because I was going to start smiling if he looked over at me on more time.
I then remembered I was going to meet my parents at Barron's for supper. I slowly gathered up my stuff, because I didn't want it to look like I was running off. And I made sure he saw me check my watch and then I walked past him (I felt a vibe), and walked out of the JavaBean and out to my car. I gave a ring to my parents to tell them I would be a little late meeting them. Little did I know that Jonathan was talking to Pete (on his cell) as I drove away.
I had a good dinner with my parents that day. I listened to them talk about how Michael was doing, and other stuff, but my mind was on him. I kept wondering if he was thinking about me, even though we had never met nor talked before. This had to be the beginning of something good. As I kept thinking of him as I drove back to the dorms I remembered I was doing this scene with him in acting class, and the way he looked at me when we were doing the scene together just made me feel something towards him. When I got back to my room. I rang Pete up and asked him if he would now tell me who it is, but he refused. I told him that I know who it was, and Pete asked who it was, but I didn't answer him, I just told him that he should make sure he was alone with his friend before talking about me, especially in acting class. He just was silent for a minute and said, "Oh.crap." and I said I would talk to him tomorrow. I then watched a movie and read until I felt to go to sleep. I didn't fall to sleep until around three in the morning.
The next morning I got up and got ready for class. I had forgot that Jonathan was going to be there also. I tried not to look at him during the lecture but I even caught him a few times looking at me then when I would look up, he would look away. I had forgotten that I had left my cell phone on, and then Pete text messaged me. He just asked me what I was up to and I told him that I was really bored and stuff. Then Pete said the weirdest thing, he said that I looked really bored but beautiful and poetic sitting in my chair. I then told Pete that first he wasn't at this lecture and second that he had a girlfriend. But he said that he wasn't Pete. and he didn't have a girlfriend either. I was so taken aback that I almost dropped my phone, but caught it just in time. Then I asked who was he if he wasn't Pete. But he said to call him "Neo" for now. I then looked around the lecture hall and then he said that I would never find out who he is because Pete nor Sadie would never tell and he was not about to come up to me and tell me. I asked him if the reason I don't know who he is because he's really shy.
In which "Neo" said that he was very shy. I then said that he could have just came up to me in the JavaBean and asked me for my email address and we could just talk online. As soon as I sent that text, I looked over at Jonathan. He's such a sly and cleaver person because he just acted like he was taking notes and he knew I was looking at him. I stared at him for about 3 minutes to see if he would break but he didn't. God, he's really good, then again he is taking an acting class. Then I paid attention to the professor for a few minutes and took some more notes. Then he said that I would never guess who was, and even if I did he nor Pete or Sadie would tell me if it was him or not. Then I told him that I have my own ways of finding out things when other people aren't paying attention, I pick up on things he nor Pete would guess I notice. I said for example the way he looks at me when he thinks I am not looking at him. Then he asked to tell me (if I thought I knew) what his name was. But before I had a chance to, the lecture let out. Then I just remembered that I have acting class and art today too. Oh this should be fun. Then I looked back on my cell phone as I was walking back to the dorm, in which "Neo" was still on and waiting for my reply. I hesitated a bit and then he said that if I was hesitant than he could just wait till later or something.
I said that would be fine, Jonathan! and then clicked off. I went back to my room and had to just recall what had just happened. I smiled, sighed, and turned on some music and rested before I had to go to art class. I must have dosed off because the sound of my cell phone ringing woke me up. I answered it and it was Sadie. She asked if I had planned to skip art class or did I just forget. I quickly glanced at my watch and said, "Shit! I over slept!" and then she said that I didn't miss anything and since I am already almost done with my painting that I didn't have to be there today but she also said that "Neo" missed you in art class today. I just giggled and said I would talk to her later.
I got up and refreshed myself and headed towards acting class. On the way to class, it hit me. You know, getting nervous and stuff. What if we have to do a scene together? I don't think I would be able to concentrate long enough with him up on stage with me. I got to the theatre building and took a deep breath and went in. Only when I got in, Jonathan hadn't arrived yet. Phew. Sadie and Pete were already there, sitting together and talking. When they saw me come in, they waved and smiled as I came over to sit with them. I looked at both of them, laughed and shook my head. Pete asked, with a smile, if I had a good conversation with "Neo". I smiled and said you could just use his name. Then Pete gave me a sly look because he was trying to see if I was tricking him to say Jonathan's name or if Jonathan had told me it was him. He was about ready to say something when our professor came in and started talking. She said that we wouldn't be doing any scenes today because he had something important to announce. I looked around for Jonathan and spotted him directly across from me and on the other side of the auditorium. He, at first, was paying attention to our professor, but then he looked over at me.
I nodded and smiled at him and he smiled and nodded back (but the smile was an intense smile). We must have been looking at each other for a while because Sadie nudged me to pay attention soon after. Turns out, the first of the four plays UNI will be putting on this year is going to be Chicago and she wants us to all audition. I thought I would audition and to see if I was good enough to get a part. Pete and Sadie I am a really good actress, but I thought Chicago would be interesting to try out my singing skills too and plus it's one of my favorite musicals. After she was done she dismissed us early and told everyone what day the auditions would be held. I made sure Jonathan left before me. There I was almost 21 years old, and I still get the nervous crap like I was still 16. I told Pete and Sadie that I might not go to the movies with them tonight because I felt a migraine coming. Sadie said that she hoped it passed and that if my migraine passed and I still wanted to come to the movie that I could just give her a call and she'd pick me up. "Ok." I said and smiled. And then headed towards the library to do look up some books. It was a bad idea considering I had a migraine now.
But I went in and looked for a few books. Then my migraine got really bad, so I left and went back to my dorm room. The migraine hurt so bad I just wanted it to go away. I took aspirin and laid down, but didn't fall asleep. After about two hours of lying down I heard my cell phone ring, I slowly answered it and said, "I am not any better than I was 2 hours ago, Sadie. So I wont be able to come." A voice on the other end said, "Umm, well I am sorry you don't feel well Emily but this is not Sadie.It's Jonathan." I just slowly, in awe, said "What?!" He sort of laughed and said, "It's Neo." I smiled to myself and said, "I know it's you, but how did you get my number? Oh, wait, let me guess.Pete gave it you?" "Yes, he did. Was that ok?" "Yeah that was fine. I actually have been wanting to talk to you for awhile now." "Oh really?" he asked amazed. I smiled and said, "Yeah...are you going to audition for Chicago?" He said, "I don't know yet. I might. Are you going to?" "I don't know either. I want to but I don't know if I am that good." "You are really good. I mean that Emily." "Thanks Jonathan. You are really good too." "Thanks. But, I'll let you go, since you aren't feeling well and aren't coming to the movie tonight." He said. "Oh, you are going tonight with Sadie and Pete?" "Yeah. Not really my thing, but I thought you might come so yeah I am still going." "Hmmm.I think my migraine is going to go away, and I think I might come." "Well, you don't have to come even if I am. You should rest cause you look like you've not really gotten much sleep lately." "You looked really tired yourself." "Ah well, that's my life. Late nights. Early mornings." "Same here. Well, I think I am going to rest tonight. Have fun at the movies and sorry I couldn't come and see you. Give me a call when you get back if you want. I'll be up." I said, smiling. I could tell he was smiling, "Ok. Well hopefully you will get better. And I will talk to you later." "Thanks. Talk to you later" "Bye.." Then we hung up. Wow. I had to collect myself and just review what had just happened. I am surprised he wasn't that shy about calling me, I guess he really is interested in me. I wonder what kind of stuff he writes. I still write a lot of poetry and short stories still. I checked my clock, it was 9:00 pm when I had gotten of the phone with Jonathan. I still couldn't believe he just called and talked to me. Wow. My migraine was still there but I was too happy now to notice. I turned on some music to get me to fall asleep, which helped because I went to sleep soon after. I woke up the next morning thinking of Jonathan. I had forgot he said he was going to call me last night. I checked my messages on my cell, in which there was one from him. Jonathan, sounding tired, just said that he would give me a call tomorrow (meaning today) since he guessed that I was asleep and he didn't want to wake me. I took a shower, got dressed, and went back into my room. Not long after, I heard a knock at my door. I opened it to find Suz, my best friend who decided not to talk to me since I broken up with Mark, and who I have seen for like five months. I looked at her, with a vacant expression on my face. She looked confused about something. She looked at me and said, "I don't know, I need someone to talk to." I could tell she was on the verge of tears. I let her in and shut my door, she sat down in my chair by the computer, and just shook her head. "Suz..what is it?" I asked with deep concern. I mean, after all she was my friend. She shook her head. "I.", she choked up and said, "I'm pregnant." My mouth literally dropped and I moved over to sit on my bed across from her. I handed her a tissue. She said thanks. I then just shook my head and said, "..God I don't know what to say.first, let me ask you, is it my brother's?" She nodded. Then she looked up at me. "But we used protection and were so careful, I still don't see how I could have.." I nodded and listened to her basically tell me how she knew that she was pregnant and how she was afraid to tell Michael. I kept thinking how much Suz hasn't changed since the first years I met her. She still is innocent and didn't realize things like getting pregnant and stuff happens every day. I told her all about even if Michael and her used protection and was careful she could have still gotten pregnant. She started crying and said she didn't know if she should tell Michael or break up with him, or what. I told her that yes, he should know, but have me tell him. She asked if I would really do that for her and I answered I would, since he might take it just a tad bit better from his sister than his girlfriend. I asked her if she had a specific time or day she wanted me to tell him. She said as soon as possible. She was not crying anymore, so that was actually good because I thought for sure my next question was going to make her start crying again. I asked her how many weeks along in the pregnancy was she and was she planning on keeping it. She said that she was about four or five weeks (that's what the doctor said) and said she had decided to keep the child even if Michael decided to break up with her. I looked at her and then gave her a long hug. I told her she could stay here for a while if she didn't want to go back to her dorm. She said she would for a few days if that was ok. I said it was fine. I thought for a long time and said that I would call my brother tonight and ask him to meet me for breakfast tomorrow, since, after all, it was the weekend. I was just getting ready to email Michael when my cell rang. I answered it, forgetting that Jonathan said he was going to call me today. I was so happy when I heard his voice that I completely forgot Suz was in the room, but I noticed she was kind of listening in, so I stepped out into the hallway and walked over to the lounge. Jonathan asked if I was feeling better and stuff. I asked him how was the movie and if he was tired today. He said that the movie was pretty good and that he was not as tired as he has been lately. I asked him to do me a favor. He said he would do whatever I asked. I smiled and asked him to go to Pete's dorm and tell Pete that I need to talk to you both of you. He got really serious and said, "Why? Is something wrong? Are you in trouble?" I said calmly, "No, no, nothing like that. I just need your guys help and advice.' "Oh. Ok. Yeah, I'll be right over." He said. "Great. Thanks." I said. "No problem. See you in a few." "Bye." "Bye.." I said and smiled sitting a lounge chair.
I went back to my dorm room and told Suz that everything is going to be taken care of. She said she was very thankful that I was helping her. I told her I had to leave to go take care of something and that I would be back in about an hour and she could just hang out here and watch a movie. I also told her that if anyone called or stopped by, she didn't have to answer either one. She said that she really appreciated my help. I said it was no problem since I still considered her my friend. I then grabbed my cell and headed towards Pete's dorm. It was a short walk but on my way there I thought to myself. Why the hell had I called Jonathan also? I don't know him that well but maybe because I just wanted his advice also because sometimes Pete can give me weird and not that good of advice. God, I hope Jonathan doesn't think that I asked him to come over to Pete's because I just wanted to see him or something like that. I don't know. As I was thinking about all this new crap I had to deal with, my cell phone rang. I answered it, just as I was in front of Pete's building, and as soon as I said "hello?" I knew who it was, it was Michael.
"Emily?" he said.
"Yes.."
"Hey, it's Michael."
"Oh hey!."
"How ya been?"
"Alright. How you been?"
"Fine. Listen, um, have you seen or heard from Suz lately?"
I paused and decided not to tell him that I had just talk to her. "Um.not recently. I mean the last time I saw her was last May. Why? What happened?"
"Well, that's the thing. I don't know. She hasn't talked to me in a few weeks and hasn't answered any of my messages."
I felt bad now, I felt so bad lying to my brother. I had never heard this worried tone in his voice ever before. I quickly said, "Well, Michael, she could be really busy you know. But, listen sorry to cut this short, but I am late for a lecture. If you want I can or you can call me later or we can meet for breakfast tomorrow since my only class tomorrow is in the afternoon."
"Ok. I will probably call you later on."
He sounded really sad.
I quickly said "Cheer up and don't worry." as I headed up the stairs to Pete's dorm.
"Ok. Later."
"Bye."
Thank god that was over. I made it to Pete's dorm and knocked on the door. Jonathan answered, god, he looked so.. Pete was there too. I went in and Jonathan, who offered me his chair, but I said I was fine. I sat down on the floor, and then Jonathan gave me a lovely smile. Both Pete and Jonathan were silently looking at me to start talking. I quickly gave them the run down about what all was happening between my brother and Suz. I asked them how should I tell Michael and when, etc. Both Pete and Jonathan thought for a minute and Jonathan was the first to tell me what he thought I should do:
"Basically you have to tell your brother the truth and just flat out tell him that his girlfriend is pregnant and as soon as possible. Even if he doesn't take it nicely, he still would probably rather hear it from you than anyone else." Then we held each other gaze for a few, and then I broke away and asked Pete if he had anything to say. Pete said pretty much the same thing as Jonathan. I told them thanks for their help and left. I stood outside Pete's building for a few minutes and took a deep breath. I went and sat under an oak tree and pulled out one of my notebooks from my bag and began writing when my cell rang.
It was Jonathan. "Hey" he said.
"Hey. What do you want? I just left you."
"Oh, I was just wondering.um....if you are feeling better about the situation since you talked to us?"
"Yes. I'm fine..that's not why you called is it?" I asked.
"Um..",
" No.." he said. Then before I knew it, there he was, standing right in front of me.
We just looked on each other, he standing in front of me and me sitting on the ground, both on our cell phones. It was dead silence for a few minutes before I jokingly told him on my cell, "I'll have to call you back." And then I hung up. He smiled and held out his hands for me to take. Hold my hand and we're halfway there. I put my stuff back in my bag and took his hand to help me up. He helped me up and then we started walking and talking. All that fear and crap we had about talking to each other went away. We talked about a lot of things, we just started talking about the theatre and before we knew it we had walked nearly all around campus and it was 5 o'clock. We didn't even realize it until we were by the JavaBean and we had decided to go inside.
What didn't we didn't talk about in those hours walking we talked about in the JavaBean. Again, before we knew it it was like 9 pm and closing time. We then found a bench to sit on and continued talking. With a few streetlights to give us some light, he asked me, "Can I ask you a kind of personal question?"
"Sure." I said.
"Have you ever had a boyfriend?"
"Yes.once.you want the full version or the brief."
Jonathan checked his watch. "If it's alright..full version."
I smiled and said, "Sure."
So, I told him the whole history of Mark and me. He actually listened to me and I felt really comfortable around him I mean I didn't even leave one thing about Mark and mine relationship. After I was done he just shook his head and said, "Wow.."
"Yeah." I said.
"Wait..you don't mean Mark Daniels do you?"
I nodded.
"Oh, yeah he's in my dorm and in my Russian Lit. class."
"Ah.." I said and nodded.
"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" I asked looking at him.
He looked at me and then looked across the street. "Yes..once..." he said with a sadness in a voice.
"Oh, hey Jonathan, you don't have to tell me about it, sorry I brought it up."
"No, it's ok.." He stared off down the street and closed his eyes for a second and then looked at me, ".she died..in my arms...three years ago."
"God.I am so sorry." I said with sympathy.
"Do you want to know what happened?" he asked looking back at me.
I said only if he wanted to tell me. He nodded and rubbed his eyes.
"Alright.I would have been five years ago, when I was sixteen, when I met Elizabeth.." He looked off into the distance, remembering how the story began. " I was only sixteen and she had just turned sixteen when I first saw her. Actually I saw her at school a few times and didn't realize she was on of my sister's friends. Not until she came over one day to help my sister, Anne, with a project. My sister introduced me and stuff. I guess you could say it began as a friendship which during the course of that year would develop into a love relationship.." He looked down at his hands probably trying to remember everything. I said, "Again, Jonathan, if you want to stop you can."
"No, it's alright..I was just thinking.." He looked at me and then back across the street. He continued, "I don't really know how it happened. It just happened, ya know. She had come over one day, when my sister wasn't home (she had planned this, she later told me). And we were sitting on the couch when I decided to kiss her. From that moment on we knew we would never be the same again. The brief this up, we were together for almost two years, two amazing years.before it happened." he said with pain and sadness in his voice. I was still looking at him with sadness as he continued, "It was that year of that really bad ice storm." I nodded, remembering. "We were sitting in this little restaurant and she wanted to go get me something for my birthday since she hadn't had time to. She went across the icy street to a bookshop and I had stayed and paid for the food. I heard breaks screeching and somehow I knew something bad had happened. I ran outside and looked over to my left.and there was Elizabeth..pined between a light pole and this person's car. I would later find out that he came along driving and spilled coffee and didn't see Liz cross the street and slammed on the breaks to try and stop but the road was so slick that he accidentally hit her. I was such in shock, horror as I ran as fast as I could to her. She saw me coming and even through her pain she smiled. I didn't know what to do, the driver and a few people were around, they had called an ambulance and were staring in horror, all I knew is I wanted her unpinned from that pole. She wasn't that badly pinned between the pole and the car, but still it hurt her more when we finally got her out. Me and two other people who were nearby laid her down on the sidewalk and waited for the ambulance to come. I took her in my arms, I could tell she was in a lot of pain, but she tried not to show it. I still could not believe this was happening, I kept praying that it was a dream. I kept my focus on Liz. She looked at me and smiled again. I started to cry silently seeing her smile through the unimaginable pain she was having. I still remember our last words to each other. As I said, I had started to cry, and she told me, she said, " Jonathan." she slowly and weakly had raised her fingers to caress my check and then she close her eyes because the pain was so much. She opened them again, but now they were filled with tears. "Jonathan." I smiled at her and wiped my tears away. ".I love you...I don't think you know how much I love you...you were and still are the best thing that has ever happened to me.." she said starting to feel the pain more and more. I started crying again and said, "Liz don't do this.you are going to make it. Come on, you can make it, you aren't giving up that easily." "My time is done, Jonathan. I don't think I will get into the ambulance today..maybe tomorrow." I stroked her hair and smiled through my tears. "Yes..maybe tomorrow. Elizabeth, you are my life, don't leave me now. Don't leave me all alone." I said to her. She smiled and said, " Tell my parents.that I thank them for my life and they meant so much to me..and Jonathan..." she started crying and I started hearing the ambulance siren. "Come on stay with me Liz.don't do this.for God's sake please." She looked back up at me and said, "I love you.." And with her last breath she whispered, "don't worry..you have your life, fate made me leave....you this way..do one thing....live...love..." And then she passed away. I knew she was gone and lowered my head and kissed her lips for the last time. I held her until the ambulance came. After that I stood in the spot where she had been lying for what seemed like an eternity but was only a couple of hours. I silently went back to restaurant and paid for our meal. I went back to our table to get my coat and I had found one of Elizabeth's books laying on the table with her bookmark still in place. I was still in utter shock. It wouldn't hit me until later that she was truly gone and was never coming back. I went and put my coat on and walked past the scene where she had died. I walked at least a mile until I reached her parents house. With teary eyes I told Elizabeth's mother what happened. I heard her mother tell her father when he came home from work that day. It hurt so much to tell her parents and her older sister what Elizabeth's last words were...I don't even know how I got through that, let alone her family..." After he was done, I saw Jonathan look away from me for a few minutes. I just didn't know what to say. I had never experienced loss like he had before. I didn't know if should hug him, talk to him, or what. We were sitting pretty close together, so I took his hand, in which he looked back over towards me. But he took his hand away from mine and moved some of my hair away from my face and caressed my cheek. Then we slowly kissed. It wasn't pity, sadness for him, or anything like that that made me continue to kiss him under that October moon. It was falling in love.. After a nice long (but not too long) kiss, Jonathan pulled me close and said, "I thought I had forgotten how to do that." and then just kind of laughed and I smiled. Then he suggested that we should start heading back to our dorms since it was almost 11:30. We saw a few people and professors walking around, but that was usual at UNI at this time. I as we were walking I asked him which building did he lived in and coincidently he live just a few blocks away from my building. Then he asked if it would be alright if he walked me to the door and I said, "That would be nice.." and smiled warmly at him. He smiled back and we headed towards the main door that lead to the dorms. We slowly faced each other and gazing at each other. He looked away for a second and then looked back and me and said, "So...". I smiled and said, "Yep.." He then slowly leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. I kind of nuzzled him then gave him a kiss on his cheek. After a brief nuzzle, he smiled back at me and said , "Well, I guess I will see you tomorrow." I smiled at him and said, "Yes. Until then." Then Jonathan, not breaking eye contact with me, slowly started walking off and let go of my hand as he left. I'll never let go. I then quickly went inside and slowly walked up to my dorm room. Wow, what an amazing night that was. I was pretty tired when I got in my dorm, I had totally forgotten Suz was there, but she was asleep on my floor. I quietly got ready for bed and laid down in my bed. I slowly tried to think of what all I did today and tried to think of some of the things we talked about as I drifted off to sleep.
I woke up that morning remembering that last little moment between Jonathan and I last night. I rubbed my eyes and remembered I still had to tell Michael about Suz. I sighed and thought about how much I couldn't wait to see Jonathan again. I got some clothes and went and took a shower. When I got back Suz was awake and it was almost 8:00. I asked if she needed to get refreshed or anything and she said she just wanted to take a shower and then would head back to her dorm. I gave her a towel and while she was away I called Michael and arranged to meet him at the JavaBean at 8:30. When Suz came back in I told her that I was meeting Michael at 8:30 to tell him. She just sighed and said , "Alright.". Then she said she had to go back to her dorm and get ready for her class and she thanked me for everything. I told her that everything would be fine and it would work out. She smiled and said thanks again and headed out of the room. I gathered my bag and coat, not thinking of putting any make-up or anything on and not remembering I had my English class at 11 and went downstairs and walked towards the JavaBean. I arrive there with about ten minutes before 8:30. I sat down at a table and waited for Michael. I checked messages on my cell phone but there wasn't any from Jonathan or Pete. It was quiet a little too quiet if you ask me. Just as I got my chai and was reading over some lecture notes, Michael walked in, looking like shit. I waved at him and put on a weak smile trying not to notice how bad he looked. He looked like he hadn't slept in a few days and hadn't shaved in a few days at that. I really didn't know how to start this conversation, but first I offered to buy Michael some coffee, but he refused. After a few seconds of silence, Michael started talking about Suz and the apparent problem he was noticing in her behavior. After about halfway through, I finally stopped Michael and said , "Look, Michael! Stop this..I do know something. Something that you should know. Suz came to me yesterday." Michael cut me off, "She did!!?!?! How was she? Was she alright?" I nodded and said , " Yes..she's fine. But um, the reason I met you hear is because...because, well..Michael, Suz is pregnant." Michael's expression totally changed from worried to I-cant-believe-it expression. I looked him in the eyes when I said it so he knew I wasn't lying. Michael put his hand to his forehead and rubbed it. Michael said, still trying to realize how this event is going to impact him, said, "I think I am getting a headache." I didn't say anything. I gave him some aspirin that I got from my bag and gave it to him with some of my chai. "Thanks." He said with a smile. Then his smile faded and he said, "..Is it mine?.." I nodded and said, "Yes." Michael ran his fingers through his hair. I suddenly remembered a memory back when I was like sixteen, of Michael and I talking in his room. 'Nothing will change Emily, not between us.and that's a promise.' I took his hand and said, "Look at me Michael, tell me what you are thinking." Michael's blue eyes slowly met mine and then he sighed and said, "I.I don't know what to do. What's Suz doing? I mean, ya know, is she keeping it and why didn't she just tell me? And how pregnant is she?" "She was so afraid to tell you.and she wants you to know that she's going to keep it and if you don't want to be apart of it and wanted to walk away, you could. She's about four or five weeks into the pregnancy.." Michael pulled his hand away, looked across the room, and smiled, a warm smiled. Then looked back at me and said, "Like hell I am NOT going to walk away. Is she nuts? I mean I was going to give her this on her birthday day in January. But." Michael took from his pocket, a small ring, which I am guessing is an engagement ring. I looked wide eyed at him, he was smiling and said, "Where is she now?" "Um..she said she was going to go back to her dorm and get ready for class." I said starting to smile.
"Good," Michael said, getting up and glancing at his watch. "..I have some time to catch her.." He walked over to me and have me a small smooch on the cheek and said, "Thanks for telling me, Em. You are the best.and hey we need to catch up some more later.."
I smiled and said, "Yeah..ok." I waved bye and watched Michael quickly set off to go to Suz's dorm. I had to laugh at myself because I thought Michael would react differently than how he did. I smiled and thought of Jonathan. I checked my watch and went to my first class. As I was walking towards my English lesson, I was thinking what was Jonathan doing right now and remembered his soft kiss from the other night.
