Venenum.
He knew everything about it, thanks to the merciless lifetime of Jedi training. And he couldn't feel anything save for a quiet acceptance. He wondered if he was human. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" he asked, and was shocked at the way his voice stayed calm.
"What good would it do you if I told you earlier? Are you going to command me to live, and then I'm going to get better?"
"It's too soon..." was all he could think of to say.
The former Queen nodded. "I know," she said. She tried to sit up; her hand slipped on the rock and she fell back down with a muffled thud. She gave a silent laugh, as though she could not believe it herself.
He pulled her to him and gathered her up in his arms amidst the engulfing nest of their cloaks. She was cold and still. "Can you feel me holding you?" he whispered.
"Yes." Her voice was soft, but strong. "I feel only you."
The panic was rising now, bubbling from the pit of his stomach and rising up and up and up. He wanted to howl with tears, to scream at her for lying to him, to never let her go, to die with her. He bit the inside of his bottom lip and tasted blood. He kept it down. "What were you going to tell me?"
"It's about the probe droids."
He nodded.
"After I die, wrap me in your cloak. The probe droids will see me and analyze that I'm dead. They'll believe it's you and they'll send the pictures back to the Empire, and Darth Vader will finally celebrate his little victory. And you... you'll be free. Give yourself a new name. You won't have to hide anymore--"
"Stop, stop." He shook his head furiously and saw his tears sprinkle over her face. "I with be able to live with myself after this."
"Then I'm just going to die and that's it?" Padmé demanded incredulously, fiercely whispering. "How can you do this to me, Obi Wan?"
"Because I love you too much to put you though that degradation," he said.
She kissed his cheek with icy lips. "And I not only love you, I can also think while I'm in love. Promise me."
He felt her fading, and there was nothing else he could do. "I promise."
She smiled faintly and curled into him, silent.
He tightened his grip around her and touched their foreheads together. "Don't go, Padmé. Not now."
"I don't even feel like I'm dying," she murmured in response. "It's not so bad."
"Padmé, stay with me for a second longer."
"You're so warm..."
He kissed her softly. "Promise me something. When you're there, wait for me, all right?"
"I promise," she said. Her eyelids fluttered. "And I'm planning to wait a long, long time, Obi Wan Kenobi." Her eyes closed and she fell against him limply.
He let out a silent yell.
