DISCLAIMER: An optimist is a person who doesn't own Harry Potter, but still summons enough courage and love to start to write fanfiction with those characters who do not belong to anybody but J.K. Rowling.
Author's note: I'm sorry that it took me so long to update after this nasty cliffy, but in my defence I have to admit that I hardly got reviews for my last chapter. I thank those who reviewed because the next chapter is for you, you keep me going. During the last week, I really thought about stopping to write this story, because I had so many ideas for new stories in my mind and I'm not really sure whether people are still interested in this story. Well. I don't know. Some of you (like Draco Improbus) seem to be more interested in the fact that a guy could be writing fanfiction. Especially Draco and Hermione fluff. You know what? This is nothing out of the ordinary. There are black writers (like James Baldwin) who write novels in which not a single character is black. There are men who write fluffy love stories and romances (like Shakespeare...just think of Romeo and Juliet or Othello or The Tempest) and there are women who write and choose the perspective of a male. You only think that this is extraordinary, because you're not used to it and not aware of it...but don't you think there are guys out there who wish they would look like Malfoy? Be like Malfoy?
Btw: Exlibris (thank you very much for betareading this story and giving me the support I need) pointed out that in those fluff scenes Draco and Hermione are nearly thinking the same. She didn't like that. Well, nobody else complained about it (well, maybe you were just too lazy to do that or too annoyed, whatever), but I thought I better explain it a bit here...their love is something magical, and there's a reason why they have similar thoughts. I just don't want to give away too much...oh, and do you still think this story is predictable?
Sorry, if the following chapter is a bit boring, but, hmm, better than nothing, I guess...
Please read and review... and tell me whether I should bother to go on with the story or not.
***
For you I cast the clouds aside so that you can see the stars in the sky.
For you I make the world spin until you're back with me.
For you I'll be brighter than the light.
For you I'll make every day last an eternity.
For you I scream and cry and laugh and live,
Only for you.
***
And Then We Were Defeated
Chapter 19
So this is who I am
***
Hermione slowly opened her eyes. Again she didn't know where she was and she couldn't recall what had happened after she had been hit with the Cruciatus Curse. She had a terrible headache and wondered whether her body would be able to recover from all those bruises and spells she had suffered from during the last days and hours.
In the distance she could see the sun rising. Dawn. She must have been unconscious for several hours. She gave a groan as the memories of the events in the hut came back flooding her mind. Kissing Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter walking on them, and then the Cruciatus Curse. She knew something had been wrong as soon as she had looked into his eyes. They weren't those sparkling deep emerald ones she was used to, nevertheless, they were familiar...how on earth could...
"So you're finally back among the living." Hermione couldn't finish her last thought, because a well-known sneer interrupted her. Draco Malfoy was casually leaning against a tree, his arms folded across his chest and his blond hair hanging all messy in his eyes. He definitely looked worried, confused and nervous. Probably she didn't look any better in that particular moment. He was still wearing his silk pyjamas and if the situation hadn't been so strange and horrible, Hermione would have surely laughed at the sight of him. Watching Hermione intently, Draco bit his lip and tried to figure out what to tell her. His whole life had turned upside down during the last hours, and Hermione Granger was the only thing, well, person, that remained constant. She was still lying on the ground where he had put her after his terrible and hectic flight from the hut. Her hair was a real bushy mess, her clothes were dirty and her skin bruised. She looked so pale, fragile and vulnerable.
"What happened? Where are we?" Hermione asked getting into a sitting position.
"I guess, you still remember that your precious little friend Potter hit you with that nasty spell of his."
Hermione scowled. She knew it hadn't been Harry, but wasn't sure if she should fill in Malfoy with this information, yet. Something was terribly wrong here and she had absolutely no clue whom she could trust. What if Malfoy wasn't even Malfoy? Again the memory of their kiss flooded her mind...his lips, so soft and cool. She shivered and for seconds she fought the urge to simply close her eyes and give in to those comforting and cosy thoughts.
Draco noticed that her brown eyes had darkened as he had uttered the last sentence. Then he sighed, this mudblood made him literally go crazy. One second he wanted to kill her and the next one he worried if she was all right.
Shaking his head as if he himself couldn't understand why he had done what he was about to tell her, he admitted "I don't know why, but I stunned Potter and got myself out of there."
"And, obviously, you took me with you. Why? Why didn't you just leave me with Harry?" she asked, but could already feel the answer inside of her heart. She could see that it took him some effort to say the next sentence and his usually pale cheeks flushed a little.
"I couldn't leave you behind, Granger. Something was wrong. Potter would never hurt you." and after a tiny pause he added calmly "Polyjuice Potion."
Hermione nodded and an attentive observer would have noticed that she tried to hide her sadness when she said "You're right, that wasn't Harry."
Somehow it struck Draco Malfoy that she was so depressed. Hermione was still sitting there on the mossy ground, her arms safely tucked around her knees. What the hell was it with this mudblood, why had he taken her with him anyway? He could have left her at the hut as well. Angry with himself he started to walk away from her. He would simply leave her where she was. He could take care of himself and find a way to get out this horrid situation he had gotten himself into. No, it was all her fault. He cursed, but he was merely twenty yards away when a nagging little voice began to persuade him to go back.. You can't leave her there. She doesn't even have a wand to protect herself. Draco Malfoy snorted, stopped and then, after a second, turned on his heels to go back to that damned mudblood.
He came to a hold right in front of her and she looked up, her eyes locking with his. Hermione looked silently at him.
"How come you don't ask any more questions, Granger? You're not being your inquisitive know-it-all self, lately." he sneered.
"Maybe I'm not in the mood to ask you questions, Malfoy." her voice was barely audible and sounded tired.
Draco leaned over Hermione's small form crouching on the ground.
"You're not even interested in what happened to Potter?" he smirked, his grey eyes still fixed with hers. Being so close to her and being able to smell her caused a tingling, warm sensation to spread in his body.
"It wasn't Harry and why should I bother about what happens to someone who uses one of the unforgivable curses on me?"
He frowned, then bent down to her and took her delicate hand in his. Oddly how good it felt to touch her. "Hermione, I..." Draco started, but she interrupted him "So this is who we are. Associating with the archenemy. Don't you think it is ridiculous that suddenly we can't get each other out of our heads?" she pulled her hand out of his grasp and bitterness and sarcasm dripped from her words when she continued "I guess I should be thankful that you rescued me, that you saved my life when "Harry" attacked, but I don't give a damn. You are Draco Malfoy, a deatheater and I'm nothing but - how do you put it?- a filthy mudblood. I'd never voluntary have feelings for you, Malfoy and I'm pretty sure this goes for you the other way round as well. We both must be under that spell you heard Dumbledore and Voldemort talk about."
Draco's gaze didn't reveal his thoughts. He simply looked at her without expression and without feeling.
"So this is who I am, hm? A deatheater who was stupid enough to associate with a mudblood because he was put under a spell, oh, let me correct that, we are even engaged." His grey, stormy eyes narrowed dangerously and inside he could feel his stomach churn. He knew perfectly that Hermione was probably right, but still, it hurt that she rejected him. She watched him, her eyes searching for something in his soul, then turning cold and icy. After a while he cleared his throat and started to talk again "Then, what do you suggest I'd do now?"
"I suggest we both return to the Manor. We have to get to Voldemort and break that spell...and we have to find out what they have in store for us. I hate to spend another minute with you, Malfoy, but I don't have a choice."
Hermione's stomach ached. She had meant every single word she had said, however, her heart hurt. She felt attached to Draco, although she didn't want to admit it. Hermione Granger wouldn't give in any further to this damn spell that was cast on her and this bloody bastard than she had already done. She kept telling herself that all those feelings were fake, something based on magic and not on emotions. She would never fall for her enemy.
With a slow movement she pulled the ring off her finger and put it in his hand. "I don't think I have to wear this any longer."
***
Both Hermione and Draco were unaware of the pair of blue eyes that watched the two intensively as they were having their conversation. Those eyes looked content and smug; finally he would get what he had been waiting for so long. From now on he would be the centre of attention and he would be the one having the power in his hands. He smirked, then disappeared.
***
Lucius Malfoy paced nervously up and down his son's room in a disordered manor. It had been on the brink of dawn when one of the house-elves had come to his bedroom to wake him. Both his son and that mudblood bitch had disappeared throughout the night.
In one hand, he didn't care whether Hermione Granger was still sound and safe, but on the other hand, the fact that his son had vanished too, did bother him a lot. What would the Dark Lord say when he heard about it?
Little did Lucius Malfoy know, that the Dark Lord already knew that Draco and Hermione were somewhere out in the country and that he already expected them to be back in the Manor before the sun would go down.
***
So this is who I am,
And this is all I know,
And I must choose to live,
For all that I can give,
The spark that makes the power grow.
And I will stand for my dream if I can,
Symbol of my faith in who I am,
And I must follow on the road that lies ahead,
And I won't let my heart control my head,
[B., R. and M. Gibb]
***
I know this chapter sucks, but I was glad to have something written at all, it is somehow the prologue for the next chapter and I didn't want to make you wait any longer...please, tell me what you think about it and review...
