9
The walk to Hogesmede did not take long, but the group took their time to enjoy the cool autumn air and fall leaves. James looked at Alice beside him, shivering because she chose to wear a summer tank top and shorts. Feeling bad and also annoyed, James handed her his jacket. Maybe he would just let her keep it and buy another. James gave things away like that all the time. In fact, Sirius may have been wearing his shoes.
Far ahead, Remus, Lily, and Sirius were having a leaf fight, all while making a very noticeable ruckus. Lily screamed at Sirius tackled her and shoved a handful of leaves down the back of her sweater. That was the last straw for Belle, who joined in a last ditch effort to defend her roommate. She jumped on Sirius, who collapsed onto Lily. Then Remus came running at then at full speed, and jumped onto Belle. At the bottom of the jam pile, Lily moaned and said "Remus, I'm going to kill you."
Alice giggled and took James' arm. She did not sense anything wrong with him lately, even if everyone else noticed he was looking a bit tired and drawn. This kind of thing went right by Alice, she preferred to remain cheerful at all times despite the circumstances.
They walked by the pile, as Belle and Lily attempted to get out from underneath the Remus and Sirius sandwich. Alice continued to tell James about how hard Transfiguration was for her, and that it was just too difficult - she didn't understand how anyone was any good at it.
"I know you're a year ahead of me and all," she added, "but maybe you could help me out you know, like a tutor." With that she batted her eyes at James. He thought for a moment.
"You know Alice, if sounds like you really need help," he started. Alice nodded vigorously. "And I have to be honest with you, Sirius is much better at Transfiguration than I am. I bet I can get him to tutor you. "Hey! Sirius, come here," he called.
Alice began to shake her head and mutter out something, but Sirius was already over holding both of Belle's shoes he had pulled off her feet with a spell. She was yelling from afar.
"Yes James?" he asked.
"Alice here needs some help in Transfiguration. Do you think you could help her out?"
"Oh yeah, sure," said Sirius. "Alice, we can start on Monday. Yep, I'm going to whip you into shape. You'll eat, sleep, and dream Transfiguration," he vowed, holding a shoe to his heart and smiling charmingly. His black eyes sparkled.
"Oh, ummmm thank you," said Alice quietly. Realizing not only that her idea had backfired, but also just how much she hated Transfiguration, she became quiet in thought. Suddenly, Sirius was mowed down by an angry Belle, who grabbed one of her shoes and started beating him with it.
James was assaulted by a sudden pile of wet, damp leaves. A grinning Remus was the obvious culprit. For the moment he put aside his thoughts, pushed up his sleeves, and chased his friend down the road.
*
After a day of shopping, lunch, and leaf fighting, the group finally settled in for some ButterBeer at the local tavern. James and Lily had managed not to say too much to each other, so the day had gone smoothly. They still had a few hours before final curfew, so they set up camp at their table in the cavern, talking as it slowly emptied. In the corner was a Muggle invention - Lily fished some quarters out of her bag and announced she was going to start up the Jukebox. No one at the table was aware of what she meant, but they all smiled and nodded.
The machine was pretty old, and Lily was happy to find she could play a large amount of songs for her money, but all the options were Oldies. She punched in her choices, and walked back to the table. When the music began, the table looked at her, then the jukebox, and nodded in understanding.
After awhile, Alice got up and went to talk to some of her sixth year friends at another table.
The first few songs were some old fast ones, and the group continued to talk. But when a slow tune came on, Sirius turned to Belle and held his hand out in a dramatic invitation. She accepted just as dramatically, and they went to goof off on the dance floor. Their dance looked like a twisted version of the Muggle Tango.
"Lily," Remus began, "it is obvious Sirius and Belle have no idea what real dancing looks like. Shall we show them?"
"Why yes Remus, thank you," Lily replied, giving him her hand. Immediately he swept her into his arms, guiding her around the dance floor like an expert. Lily grinned and joined him in the steps, surprising Remus.
"Evans!" he exclaimed, "I had no idea you could dance," he said as she spun her at first out and then back into his grasp.
"You're not completely horrible yourself," she replied, "Where did you learn?"
"Promise you won't laugh," he said, chuckling himself.
"I swear," said Lily, circling him.
Remus sighed. "My mom, she's a bit stuck in the past," he said.
Lily laughed.
"You promised," he chided.
"I know, I know," Lily said, glancing over at the table. James was watching them. Not Belle and Sirius, but her and Remus. Remus looked over as well.
"Our friend looks a bit lonely," he said offhandedly.
"Our friend?" demanded Lily. "I don't recall ever saying that James Potter was my friend."
"Yes, yes, I know." Remus paused, and looked her in the eye. "You two just can't stand each other," he added, with an edge of something secretive in his voice.
"What's that supposed to mean Remus?"
"Oh nothing, Nothing at all. Just making conversation Lily. We haven't had a chance to talk lately," he said, spinning her around. This of course was true. She realized James and Sirius had taken up most of her attention recently, which was in a way very comical and sad.
"You're smooth on your feet Remus," she said playfully. "You must be popular with the ladies."
"Oh yes, Evans, very very popular," he said, laughing.
"Why don't you have a girlfriend Remus?"
"Why the question? Sirius doesn't have a girlfriend, neither does Peter. You should ask them," he said.
"Fair enough, but you see, I don't even know Peter all that well. And Sirius, well, even if they never, ever date, I think his soul mate is definitely Belle," Lily declared, pointing at the two. Belle, much smaller than the tall muscular Sirius, was dipping him. "They're so strange," she said as an afterthought.
"Ok, ok, fair enough. I suppose then, the answer is that all the good ones are taken at this point," Remus conceded.
"Oh really?" Lily scoffed, pretending to be offended. "What about me, Mr. Lupin? I am currently unattached."
"Yes, I guess so," he said with a smile, though he sounded thoroughly unconvinced. "You see Evans, it's just not in the Fates."
"It isn't?" asked Lily.
"No, sadly, it is not. You and I are not meant to be."
"Well then, how would you know this? Since when can you see the future?"
Remus stopped dancing, and got a very serious look on his face. After a second of suspense, he whispered "Since I began Madame Trelawny's Divination class," then burst into laughter.
She too let go of the giggles she had been holding in for a moment. "Yes," he continued, "Now I have seen and know all - and you and I Lily - are not meant to be."
Even though they were both laughing, Lily could sense there was some ring of truth to what he was saying. He knew something, or a least thought he did. She wondered what it was. There was a look in his eye, as if there was really something she didn't know.
"Okay then, 'All-Knowing Lupin,' then tell me who I will marry, or at least the lotto numbers for next week," Lily begged.
At first Remus looked confused. "Lily, I don't know what a Lotto is. But as for the marrying thing, I just can't tell you that!" he exclaimed.
"What? Why not?" she demanded.
"Because, it just doesn't work that way. And it's not supposed to happen that way," he said, then quickly followed it with, "So you see, I can only reveal some of my powers to you now, all other questions you will have to find out on your own, unless you happen to have a large number of gold Galleons in your pocket."
Lily laughed and said no. The song ended.
Remus looked at her for a moment, and then said, "You know Lily, sometimes it doesn't hurt to give fate a little kick in the ass to get it started." He put his hands on each side of her face, leaned in, and kissed her on the forehead. Lily was touched by the gesture, and gave him a hug in return.
Lily didn't see it, but Remus was smiling over her shoulder.
*
James took another sip of his ButterBeer, which he had hardly touched since coming into the Tavern. He watched Sirius and Belle disturb and scare the other customers with their antics and "dancing," and finally settled on watching Remus and Lily. Remus had pulled her in close, wrapping his arm entirely around her waist, and the other held her hand, as he rested the entertwined digits on his chest. They seemed to be having a very serious conversation, but they both burst out laughing regularly.
They looked very well together, Remus and Lily. James decided that they must enjoy each other's company, but he should have known that before - after all, they were friends. And he decided from that distance that Remus could probably smell Lily's hair.
Maybe if Remus dated Lily, she could stay out of his way most of the time. Perhaps Madame Trelawny would see they shared the same "energy" and switch them partners. James had a moment of joy at the prospect, an idea of the peacefulness his life would contain if Lily were socially missing.
James watched as Remus touched Lily's face and kissed her on the forehead. Then Lily wrapped her arms around him in a hug.
James' heart exploded.
His mind and heart were at war. His head had waged war against Evans long ago, he hated her - from her dark blood red hair to the soles of her feet he burned with contempt for each inch of her.
And with every fiber of his being he longed to touch her. Her hair, her face - when she had put her hand over his in class he literally shook. When she had kissed his cheek, he almost lost it. The want was so bad that he was shaking within proximity of her. And James didn't want her to know, under any circumstance. He didn't even understand it what was going on, they couldn't go long without bursting into an argument. But then again, he needed to touch her. To the point where felt his legs begin to move against his will, carrying him across the dance floor of the tavern.
His hands had already begun to shake. Lily had chosen another slow song.
He heard himself approach the two, he heard himself ask to cut in. He saw the look of shock on Lily's face, then one of suspicion, all through a slow, muffled haze.
Remus did not put up the fight he expected. In fact, his friend just smiled and backed away, handing Lily's hand to James. He stared at it for a moment, and then took it in his own.
*
Lily moved in towards James. If he wanted to dance, she would dance. Hopefully he wasn't up to anything. She felt their skin make contact as he took he hand, and thought she heard him take in a sharp breath. But then again, the music was loud, and she could have been mistaken. He wrapped his other arm around her, but kept a neutral distance. He was too tall for her to see his face, so she tilted her eyes up to him. They were closed.
"James?" she asked.
"Yes Evans?" he replied after a moment of hesitation.
"Number one, why do you want to dance with me - number two, why aren't you dancing with Alice?" She decided to be up front.
James did not answer right away. He took a minute while dancing, then explained, "I am giving Remus a chance to talk with Katie Bell, that Ravenclaw over there," he motioned, and sure enough, Remus was talking to Katie Bell. "Secondly, I can't dance with Alice, because I am dancing with you," he said, as if the question itself were obvious.
"I see," said Lily, satisfied with his explanation. But something was off. She could feel something almost emanating from him, as if silently he was begging her for - what? She did not understand James Potter. Just yesterday he had told her to leave him the 'bloody hell alone.' And he had meant it.
Lily gave up on it, and suddenly realized the hand that held hers was shaking slightly. Not as much as in the class or the locker room, but it seemed he was concentrating on keeping it steady. She looked at his closed eyes; they were rimmed with dark circles. He looked so worn. Lily moved in closer, till her nose was almost touching his shirt. She felt his arm wrap tighter around her; the hand holding her own began to tremble more violently. In fact, now that she was closer, she felt a tremor through all of him. Fascinated, she laid her head against him, fitting into the crook of his neck. Not only was he shaking, but she felt his heart racing. She heard him gasp even though it was barely audible.
The sound caught her own breath in her throat.
She was completely enclosed in him. She felt and heard every movement. And there was a need for something, a desperate want. She didn't know if it had anything to do with her, as she may just be a warm body while James assisted Remus with Katie; and who knows, Alice could be next. James was known for how many girls he'd dated. Maybe he was just so exhausted he couldn't do anything else.
She took her hand from him, and wrapped it around his neck to join the other. Slowly, she slid it into his hair at the nape of his neck, the unruly but stylish mess. She ran it though her fingers, pulling it softly, then sliding her hand back down into it again. With her other arm, she pulled him closer and lower. She remembered when they had played chess and she had wanted so badly to touch him for just a moment. Outside the locker room on the day Belle got hurt, she was tempted. So now she did.
Because if he asked her to dance, then they were going to do it right. Lily gave no thought to the consequence or significance of her actions. She wanted James to be closer, so she simply pulled him there.
*
There was no music for James.
He had played off his asking her to dance quite well, and given two excellent excuses. But he couldn't hide the shaking, the heartbeat, his nervousness. At first he kept his eyes closed to concentrate, and keep calm. This was the girl he disliked, that he argued with constantly. Yes, good. Ok, everything made sense.
When she moved closer to him, he was overwhelmed. When she put her head on his chest he was in disbelief and drowned in the smell of her hair. But when she put her hand in his hair and played with the back of his neck, it was all he could do to keep his body from convulsing. His knees threatened to give out, and he shut his eyes to try and disguise the wave of severe emotion, even though she couldn't see his face.
This was Lily Evans. James hates Lily Evans.
He almost moaned in agony when her hand brushed the back of his neck lightly. The world made no sense anymore.
And then the song was over, and she was walking away.
The walk to Hogesmede did not take long, but the group took their time to enjoy the cool autumn air and fall leaves. James looked at Alice beside him, shivering because she chose to wear a summer tank top and shorts. Feeling bad and also annoyed, James handed her his jacket. Maybe he would just let her keep it and buy another. James gave things away like that all the time. In fact, Sirius may have been wearing his shoes.
Far ahead, Remus, Lily, and Sirius were having a leaf fight, all while making a very noticeable ruckus. Lily screamed at Sirius tackled her and shoved a handful of leaves down the back of her sweater. That was the last straw for Belle, who joined in a last ditch effort to defend her roommate. She jumped on Sirius, who collapsed onto Lily. Then Remus came running at then at full speed, and jumped onto Belle. At the bottom of the jam pile, Lily moaned and said "Remus, I'm going to kill you."
Alice giggled and took James' arm. She did not sense anything wrong with him lately, even if everyone else noticed he was looking a bit tired and drawn. This kind of thing went right by Alice, she preferred to remain cheerful at all times despite the circumstances.
They walked by the pile, as Belle and Lily attempted to get out from underneath the Remus and Sirius sandwich. Alice continued to tell James about how hard Transfiguration was for her, and that it was just too difficult - she didn't understand how anyone was any good at it.
"I know you're a year ahead of me and all," she added, "but maybe you could help me out you know, like a tutor." With that she batted her eyes at James. He thought for a moment.
"You know Alice, if sounds like you really need help," he started. Alice nodded vigorously. "And I have to be honest with you, Sirius is much better at Transfiguration than I am. I bet I can get him to tutor you. "Hey! Sirius, come here," he called.
Alice began to shake her head and mutter out something, but Sirius was already over holding both of Belle's shoes he had pulled off her feet with a spell. She was yelling from afar.
"Yes James?" he asked.
"Alice here needs some help in Transfiguration. Do you think you could help her out?"
"Oh yeah, sure," said Sirius. "Alice, we can start on Monday. Yep, I'm going to whip you into shape. You'll eat, sleep, and dream Transfiguration," he vowed, holding a shoe to his heart and smiling charmingly. His black eyes sparkled.
"Oh, ummmm thank you," said Alice quietly. Realizing not only that her idea had backfired, but also just how much she hated Transfiguration, she became quiet in thought. Suddenly, Sirius was mowed down by an angry Belle, who grabbed one of her shoes and started beating him with it.
James was assaulted by a sudden pile of wet, damp leaves. A grinning Remus was the obvious culprit. For the moment he put aside his thoughts, pushed up his sleeves, and chased his friend down the road.
*
After a day of shopping, lunch, and leaf fighting, the group finally settled in for some ButterBeer at the local tavern. James and Lily had managed not to say too much to each other, so the day had gone smoothly. They still had a few hours before final curfew, so they set up camp at their table in the cavern, talking as it slowly emptied. In the corner was a Muggle invention - Lily fished some quarters out of her bag and announced she was going to start up the Jukebox. No one at the table was aware of what she meant, but they all smiled and nodded.
The machine was pretty old, and Lily was happy to find she could play a large amount of songs for her money, but all the options were Oldies. She punched in her choices, and walked back to the table. When the music began, the table looked at her, then the jukebox, and nodded in understanding.
After awhile, Alice got up and went to talk to some of her sixth year friends at another table.
The first few songs were some old fast ones, and the group continued to talk. But when a slow tune came on, Sirius turned to Belle and held his hand out in a dramatic invitation. She accepted just as dramatically, and they went to goof off on the dance floor. Their dance looked like a twisted version of the Muggle Tango.
"Lily," Remus began, "it is obvious Sirius and Belle have no idea what real dancing looks like. Shall we show them?"
"Why yes Remus, thank you," Lily replied, giving him her hand. Immediately he swept her into his arms, guiding her around the dance floor like an expert. Lily grinned and joined him in the steps, surprising Remus.
"Evans!" he exclaimed, "I had no idea you could dance," he said as she spun her at first out and then back into his grasp.
"You're not completely horrible yourself," she replied, "Where did you learn?"
"Promise you won't laugh," he said, chuckling himself.
"I swear," said Lily, circling him.
Remus sighed. "My mom, she's a bit stuck in the past," he said.
Lily laughed.
"You promised," he chided.
"I know, I know," Lily said, glancing over at the table. James was watching them. Not Belle and Sirius, but her and Remus. Remus looked over as well.
"Our friend looks a bit lonely," he said offhandedly.
"Our friend?" demanded Lily. "I don't recall ever saying that James Potter was my friend."
"Yes, yes, I know." Remus paused, and looked her in the eye. "You two just can't stand each other," he added, with an edge of something secretive in his voice.
"What's that supposed to mean Remus?"
"Oh nothing, Nothing at all. Just making conversation Lily. We haven't had a chance to talk lately," he said, spinning her around. This of course was true. She realized James and Sirius had taken up most of her attention recently, which was in a way very comical and sad.
"You're smooth on your feet Remus," she said playfully. "You must be popular with the ladies."
"Oh yes, Evans, very very popular," he said, laughing.
"Why don't you have a girlfriend Remus?"
"Why the question? Sirius doesn't have a girlfriend, neither does Peter. You should ask them," he said.
"Fair enough, but you see, I don't even know Peter all that well. And Sirius, well, even if they never, ever date, I think his soul mate is definitely Belle," Lily declared, pointing at the two. Belle, much smaller than the tall muscular Sirius, was dipping him. "They're so strange," she said as an afterthought.
"Ok, ok, fair enough. I suppose then, the answer is that all the good ones are taken at this point," Remus conceded.
"Oh really?" Lily scoffed, pretending to be offended. "What about me, Mr. Lupin? I am currently unattached."
"Yes, I guess so," he said with a smile, though he sounded thoroughly unconvinced. "You see Evans, it's just not in the Fates."
"It isn't?" asked Lily.
"No, sadly, it is not. You and I are not meant to be."
"Well then, how would you know this? Since when can you see the future?"
Remus stopped dancing, and got a very serious look on his face. After a second of suspense, he whispered "Since I began Madame Trelawny's Divination class," then burst into laughter.
She too let go of the giggles she had been holding in for a moment. "Yes," he continued, "Now I have seen and know all - and you and I Lily - are not meant to be."
Even though they were both laughing, Lily could sense there was some ring of truth to what he was saying. He knew something, or a least thought he did. She wondered what it was. There was a look in his eye, as if there was really something she didn't know.
"Okay then, 'All-Knowing Lupin,' then tell me who I will marry, or at least the lotto numbers for next week," Lily begged.
At first Remus looked confused. "Lily, I don't know what a Lotto is. But as for the marrying thing, I just can't tell you that!" he exclaimed.
"What? Why not?" she demanded.
"Because, it just doesn't work that way. And it's not supposed to happen that way," he said, then quickly followed it with, "So you see, I can only reveal some of my powers to you now, all other questions you will have to find out on your own, unless you happen to have a large number of gold Galleons in your pocket."
Lily laughed and said no. The song ended.
Remus looked at her for a moment, and then said, "You know Lily, sometimes it doesn't hurt to give fate a little kick in the ass to get it started." He put his hands on each side of her face, leaned in, and kissed her on the forehead. Lily was touched by the gesture, and gave him a hug in return.
Lily didn't see it, but Remus was smiling over her shoulder.
*
James took another sip of his ButterBeer, which he had hardly touched since coming into the Tavern. He watched Sirius and Belle disturb and scare the other customers with their antics and "dancing," and finally settled on watching Remus and Lily. Remus had pulled her in close, wrapping his arm entirely around her waist, and the other held her hand, as he rested the entertwined digits on his chest. They seemed to be having a very serious conversation, but they both burst out laughing regularly.
They looked very well together, Remus and Lily. James decided that they must enjoy each other's company, but he should have known that before - after all, they were friends. And he decided from that distance that Remus could probably smell Lily's hair.
Maybe if Remus dated Lily, she could stay out of his way most of the time. Perhaps Madame Trelawny would see they shared the same "energy" and switch them partners. James had a moment of joy at the prospect, an idea of the peacefulness his life would contain if Lily were socially missing.
James watched as Remus touched Lily's face and kissed her on the forehead. Then Lily wrapped her arms around him in a hug.
James' heart exploded.
His mind and heart were at war. His head had waged war against Evans long ago, he hated her - from her dark blood red hair to the soles of her feet he burned with contempt for each inch of her.
And with every fiber of his being he longed to touch her. Her hair, her face - when she had put her hand over his in class he literally shook. When she had kissed his cheek, he almost lost it. The want was so bad that he was shaking within proximity of her. And James didn't want her to know, under any circumstance. He didn't even understand it what was going on, they couldn't go long without bursting into an argument. But then again, he needed to touch her. To the point where felt his legs begin to move against his will, carrying him across the dance floor of the tavern.
His hands had already begun to shake. Lily had chosen another slow song.
He heard himself approach the two, he heard himself ask to cut in. He saw the look of shock on Lily's face, then one of suspicion, all through a slow, muffled haze.
Remus did not put up the fight he expected. In fact, his friend just smiled and backed away, handing Lily's hand to James. He stared at it for a moment, and then took it in his own.
*
Lily moved in towards James. If he wanted to dance, she would dance. Hopefully he wasn't up to anything. She felt their skin make contact as he took he hand, and thought she heard him take in a sharp breath. But then again, the music was loud, and she could have been mistaken. He wrapped his other arm around her, but kept a neutral distance. He was too tall for her to see his face, so she tilted her eyes up to him. They were closed.
"James?" she asked.
"Yes Evans?" he replied after a moment of hesitation.
"Number one, why do you want to dance with me - number two, why aren't you dancing with Alice?" She decided to be up front.
James did not answer right away. He took a minute while dancing, then explained, "I am giving Remus a chance to talk with Katie Bell, that Ravenclaw over there," he motioned, and sure enough, Remus was talking to Katie Bell. "Secondly, I can't dance with Alice, because I am dancing with you," he said, as if the question itself were obvious.
"I see," said Lily, satisfied with his explanation. But something was off. She could feel something almost emanating from him, as if silently he was begging her for - what? She did not understand James Potter. Just yesterday he had told her to leave him the 'bloody hell alone.' And he had meant it.
Lily gave up on it, and suddenly realized the hand that held hers was shaking slightly. Not as much as in the class or the locker room, but it seemed he was concentrating on keeping it steady. She looked at his closed eyes; they were rimmed with dark circles. He looked so worn. Lily moved in closer, till her nose was almost touching his shirt. She felt his arm wrap tighter around her; the hand holding her own began to tremble more violently. In fact, now that she was closer, she felt a tremor through all of him. Fascinated, she laid her head against him, fitting into the crook of his neck. Not only was he shaking, but she felt his heart racing. She heard him gasp even though it was barely audible.
The sound caught her own breath in her throat.
She was completely enclosed in him. She felt and heard every movement. And there was a need for something, a desperate want. She didn't know if it had anything to do with her, as she may just be a warm body while James assisted Remus with Katie; and who knows, Alice could be next. James was known for how many girls he'd dated. Maybe he was just so exhausted he couldn't do anything else.
She took her hand from him, and wrapped it around his neck to join the other. Slowly, she slid it into his hair at the nape of his neck, the unruly but stylish mess. She ran it though her fingers, pulling it softly, then sliding her hand back down into it again. With her other arm, she pulled him closer and lower. She remembered when they had played chess and she had wanted so badly to touch him for just a moment. Outside the locker room on the day Belle got hurt, she was tempted. So now she did.
Because if he asked her to dance, then they were going to do it right. Lily gave no thought to the consequence or significance of her actions. She wanted James to be closer, so she simply pulled him there.
*
There was no music for James.
He had played off his asking her to dance quite well, and given two excellent excuses. But he couldn't hide the shaking, the heartbeat, his nervousness. At first he kept his eyes closed to concentrate, and keep calm. This was the girl he disliked, that he argued with constantly. Yes, good. Ok, everything made sense.
When she moved closer to him, he was overwhelmed. When she put her head on his chest he was in disbelief and drowned in the smell of her hair. But when she put her hand in his hair and played with the back of his neck, it was all he could do to keep his body from convulsing. His knees threatened to give out, and he shut his eyes to try and disguise the wave of severe emotion, even though she couldn't see his face.
This was Lily Evans. James hates Lily Evans.
He almost moaned in agony when her hand brushed the back of his neck lightly. The world made no sense anymore.
And then the song was over, and she was walking away.
