THE Gohan/Videl Fic!

Chapter Nine: Math, or First Contact

Gohan and his friends filed into the room where Krillin was substituting. The bell rang immediately after Gohan sat down, and Krillin began to take roll call, and after that, he introduced himself.

"Hello class. My name is Krillin, and I'll be your sub today in Math." So far normal, Gohan thought. This period could actually go by fast...and without anything bad happening...

Some of the class snickered at Krillin's height, but he made no sign that he even heard them. Poor Krillin. He knows they can kick their butts anytime... "I'll be taking roll now. Black Pen?"

"Here."

"Briefs Trunks?"

"Present!" exclaimed all three Trunks. Krillin looked up, confused. Seeing Gohan and the rest, he raised his eyebrow. Latched on Gohan's left leg was Goten, while the right leg was currently occupied with C. Trunks. M. Goten sat down on the floor to his right, since they didn't have an extra desk, while MM. Trunks sat on his left, looking old enough to be looking like he was in the wrong grade. M. Trunks sat in the desk to his right, a result of being registered in the school database that very morning. "Ookay," Krillin mumbled. "Guess I'll have to ask Bulma later..."

Several minutes passed by before Krillin called out Videl's name. At her last name, he visibly blanched. "...Satan...Videl?"

"Here," she replied harshly. "Do you have a problem with my father?"

"Err...no," Krillin replied. Before Videl could get anything else in, he said, "Son Gohan?"

"Here," Gohan replied tiredly, his head buried in his arms. Krillin wisely chose not to bother his friend, and finished roll call.

"Your teacher left me a not saying that you were studying using these functions..." Gohan didn't listen to the rest of what Krillin was saying. Over 99% of the things his math class did he had already learned by the age of ten. Meanwhile, Goten and C. Trunks looked thoroughly confused, and decided to play Paper, Scissors, Rock while cutting off Gohan's leg circulation. Gohan was oblivious to that fact of course, and was woken up from his short nap by the sound of the classroom doors opening.

A teenager emerged from the door. "Principal Terada would like to see Satan Videl and Son Gohan in his office."

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Dende's Lookout...

I can't pass up a great opportunity like THIS! Dende thought, his face forming into an evil smirk. This is going to be SOO good!!

Mr. Popo looked visibly frightened. "Dende," he said slowly, fearing the Namek's answer, "What exactly is going through your head?"

Dende cackled. "You'll see, Mr. Popo," he replied, waving his hands in the air as if conjuring up more trouble. "Oh, you'll see."

He wouldn't, thought Mr. Popo. He knows Gohan can chop suey his head!! Meanwhile, ten feet away from the black genie, Dende threw his head back and laughed evilly. He must be possessed.

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Krillin sighed - this class was really getting out of hand. Paper balls and spit balls flew everywhere, while he sought solitude under the teacher's desk. He knew that Goten and C. Trunks were happily joined in the fight, while M. Goten, M. Trunks, and MM. Trunks helped make more 'weapons'. Krillin himself gave up ten minutes earlier. Kids these days have no respect, he thought. I wonder what Gohan's up to? As if answering his questions, and voice on the PA system spoke up.

"Gohan!! What the hell is that?!"

All fighting stopped immediately, and all eyes were on the ceiling. "Hey!! That's Videl's voice!!" exclaimed a blonde haired boy. Krillin knew him for Sharpener.

"What are you talking about?" Odd, thought Krillin. That must be Gohan.

"What am I talking about? I'm talking about that...that...hairy thing protruding out of your body!" Gasps were heard around in the classroom. "Whooo!!" cheered M. Trunks and MM. Trunks. "Go Gohan!"

"GYAHH!! It came back!!"

"What do you mean it came back?? Normal people don't usually have one of those!" All the teenage boys in the class scoffed. What the heck did Videl know? She was the daughter of Satan Hercule, for Kami's sake, and though everyone respected the World Champion, no one could deny that his I.Q. was prettty low.

"Well, my mom usually cuts it off everytime it starts growing back." Immediately, guys' hands came down to cover their most sensitive part. All of them made a face, trying to think of the agony each of them would go through. Meanwhile, in Chi Chi's Home Economics class, everybody uneasily scooted away from Gohan's mother while receiving cautious glares that told her exactly what they thought of what she did to her son.

"Ookay..."

"Err...you might want to step back, it could...umm...latch onto you." All of Orange Star High School's student population immediately burst into fits of laughter. So the Nerd of the school did have hormones, did he?

"What do you mean it might latch onto me??" (Pause.) "Oh. Like that?" Oh yes, they all concluded, Son Gohan definitely had hormones.

"Err...yeah. Stay still for a moment, I'm going to try to take it off you, Videl." Vegeta raised an eyebrow. He, of course, knew exactly was going on. The Saiyan no Ouji was just a tad bit surprised no one but he had figured that out yet. He would never admit it, but he was jealous of Gohan's ability to 'regenerate' that particular body part. It could have been quite useful sometimes...

"Hahahaha!! It tickles!! Take it off, take it off!! Hahahaha!!" Bulma was confused. What?? she thought. It's not supposed to tickle...unless Vegeta's been doing it wrong!!

"I'm trying, I'm trying!! The darn thing just has a firm grip!!" Whoa, thought Master Roshi. Maybe I need to try what he's doing...wonder if he's been doing 'exercises'?

"Hahaha!! It won't stop tickling!!"

(Pause.)

"It's finally off. You can stop laughing now." Awww, come on!! the student population thought in unison. It was just getting good!!

(Long Pause.)

"Gohan?" Everyone quirked up their ears. Maybe there was hope yet....

"Yeah?"

"Can I..."

"Can you what?"

"Could I..."

"Could you do what, Videl?"

"...Can I...touch it?" Once again, the school burst into laughter. Goku scratched his head. What was going on?? What the heck was his on doing?? He resolved to ask him later.

Grandchildren!!! thought Chi Chi.

WHAT THE FRICKIN HELL?!?!? thought Sharpener.

"WHAT?!" Reluctant, now are we? Eighteen thought. Whatever.

"It's just that...I'm curious...and it's just so cute...and I just want to know what it...feels like..." Wha?!? thought Yamcha. Cute?? Some women were weird. Oh well. It's all good...

(Grumble.)

"Fine." Krillin looked sick. He didn't exactly want to hear any of the things that he was sure going to happen...

"Really?!?" Videl sure sounds excited, thought Erasa. Hell, I'd probably be too...

"Just...hurry up."

(Pause.)

"Gohan!! It's so soft!!" MM. Trunks looked confused. Soft?? Looking over to M. Trunks, he silently voiced his question. M. Trunks just shrugged.

"Of course it is!! What'd you think it'd be like??"

"I don't know."

(Silence.)

"Where's the darn principal?!"

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Dende's Lookout...

"And my job here is done," said Dende. "I'm on a trip to Namek. Take care of the place while I'm gone!! Tell me when Gohan calms down!! And don't tell him where I am!!"

"Wait!!" exclaimed Mr. Popo "You're not leaving me here all by myself while Gohan's down there are you??"

"What's it look like I'm doing?" asked Dende, two suitcases inhand. "Just for your help, you can have how many tequilas, maragaritas, and daiquiris you want."

Before Mr. Popo could do anything, Dende took off. He sighed. I'm going to need it, he thought. As well as all the luck I can get...

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A/N: Eheheheh!! Evilness. I think that was the first time that ever happened in Gohan torturing fics, so it's all ORIGINAL!! I hope everyone knows exactly what happened...REVIEWS PLEASE!!! They make me happy. And they might actually persuade me to write faster. [wink wink]

08.12.03 -- I've edited the entire story so far, seeing as how there were some mistakes. Next chapter should be out in a while...stay tuned!