Chapter 21: Kitty's Gone Mad!

A/N~ Good chapter. Oh, man. I'm sooo tired so this chapter might be a little weird. Also I wrote most of this on the band Spring Break to Corpus Christi, so *shakes head and mumbles*. Alright, I warned you, so you can't blame me if you go insane.

Disclaimer:

Legolas: *runs in dressed as Will Turner, Orli's Pirates character, as if you didn't know that already!* Here they come!

Aragorn: Here who comes?

Legolas: The rabid fangirls. Look!

Boromir: AH! He's right! RUN!!

Kitty: They're NOT getting MY Elf! *Activates portable forcefield and carries it, with Legolas inside, away*

Me: OK. Yeah. We're all sane here. *Rolls eyes* In addition to being sane, we own all that you read about.

Boromir: She's doing it again.

Aragorn: Maybe we need the sedative back...

Me: Yea! I get my sedative back!

"What did you do that for?!" Vanessa demanded as soon as we were out of earshot of Strider.

"What did I do?" I asked innocently.

"You know," she growled.

"What? Rescue Aragorn from kissing you?" I giggled while she glared at me. "At least I remembered a key to the room!"

"How'd you know about that?"

"I couldn't sleep. Now, come on; I'm tired. Let's get back to the room."

.~*~.

After we all got up and eat (and I had my caffeine), we sat and stared at each other for lack of anything else to do. (Vanessa says she's scared. I don't know why; staring at each other is quite normal!)

Then, just to break the silence, I started talking to my Coke.

"How now, Spirit! Whither wander you? (That line is property of William Shakespeare, or whoever owns his stuff now.)" I asked the Vanilla Coke.

"I wander where ever I want to," it replied.

"Ah!" I screamed and dropped it (it's a good thing the lid was on). It bounced on the floor several times as everyone else cracked up. As I glared at them, Kitty and Legolas grew hysterical.

"Kaitlyn!" I yelled, using the dreaded full first name. "You have rubbed off WAY too much on that Elf!"

"So?" she pouted, then cackled. "I've corrupted my Elf!"

Legolas glanced at her and rolled his eyes (not as sexy as an Aragorn eyeroll, but close!). "She's on her corruption kick again!"

Then, out of the middle of nowhere, we heard a rabid (fangirl) squeal, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Legolas!!!!" and suddenly a tall blonde chick ran up and tried to tackle poor Leggy.

(I just got a Legolas poster and an Aragorn bookmark, in addition to my Merry and Pippin bookmark! EEEEEEEE!!)

The fangirl did not stand a chance. Kitty pulled a 'Matrix' on the girl and kicked her from here to Kingdom Come!

"That's it!" Kitty growled. "If another fangirl tries to touch MY Elf, I will not be responsible for my actions!" She stood and glared around the room for several minutes, then seemed to calm down. "Let's go shopping!"

"OK, I wanna get a postcard for Daniel. I told him I would because he was jealous that he couldn't come," Vanessa replied after the initial shock wore off.

"But...but...Dumplings (I have no clue where I got that from, so don't ask.), I don't want to go shopping," Legolas protested.

"But, Baby, it'll be fun," Kitty pleaded.

"No."

"It'll make me happy," she whined.

"Nuh-uh!"

"You better do it, Legolas. She's gonna start yelling in a few minutes," Courtney commented.

"She yells when she's mad. You don't want to see her mad. She hits things, and people, when she's mad," I threw in.

"Uh...uh...OK," he stammered, much to the dismay of the rest of the male population and they gave him the dirtiest looks they could manage, which, compared to the ones girls can throw, were pathetic.

"He's really whipped," Pippin whispered to Boromir.

"And you're not?" the man thought as Courtney snapped her fingers and Pippin went running towards her.

"Let's go!" Kitty demanded.

"We're coming! We're coming!" Gandalf cried hurriedly.

.~*~.

"What do you mean you don't make them?!" Kitty cried. We were in a place-y that makes/sells stamps. "How could you not make stamps that say 'Back off! He's married to me!' or 'Back off! He's mine!'? Huh? What have you got to say for yourself?!"

"Umm...s-s-s-s-sorry?" the clerk, whose nametag said 'Henry', stammered, a bit flustered at catching the full force of Hurricane Kitty.

"Come on!" Kitty said. "Alright! Everyone back to the hotel!"

"But we didn't buy anything yet!" Courtney, Vanessa, and I protested while the Fellowship breathed sighs of relief. They remember what happened last time we went shopping.

"Thank Eru for her moodswings!" I heard more than one of them mutter.

.~*~.

"Kitty? Can we come in yet?!" I demanded to know. "The rest of us need in that room too! Vanessa and I were planning on going to the pool with Aragorn and Merry. (They have an inside pool, BTW.)"

"Have fun."

"We need our suits!" Vanessa pouted.

"Too bad. Now go away!"

Kitty had locked herself in our room as soon as we got back from our short shopping spree. She wouldn't let anyone in, not even Legolas!

"Errgh!" Vanessa growled and stalked off to find her Hott-'N'-Sexy-Ranger- With-A-Nice-Butt (HNSRWANB) and I went to find Merry.

.~*~.

"Eureka! I've got it!" Kitty yelled/announced as she ran into the room we were sitting in (the hobbits' and Gandalf's).

"What? What have you got? Food?" Pippin asked anxiously.

"NO! That would be nice though, but no. I've created the world's first portable forcefield!"

"To do what with?" Legolas inquired, looking worried.

"To protect you from fangirls, of course! Come on! Let's go try it out!"

.~*~.

"Umm...Kitty? Dearest?" Legolas said from inside the forcefield. "I can't move!"

"What do you want to move for? Moving is highly overrated!"

"Let me out!"

"Fine," she pouted and complied with her husband's wishes.

A/N~ Whoo! That was long! But it was fun! Review!