Opposites Attract?
Note: Once again, I don't own Dragonlance and I am not making any money off of this. On another topic, thank you for the reviews so far! I'm always eager to find out other's opinions on my writing. Well, this chapter is a lot longer than the last one, and I hope you enjoy!
Undead Ballerina
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Chapter 2: Marital Bliss
Three months after the 'forest episode', in the Master Chamber of the Tower of High Sorcery, the lovely cleric of Paladine wakes up in a huge canopy bed with gargoyles carved into the posts. The mage, wearing his usual black robe, is sipping his medicinal tea while looking over an arcane tome.
Raistlin: Looks like you've finally decided to wake up, Revered Daughter. Tell me, do all spoiled aristocrats and pampered clergymen keep the same lazy hours as you do?
Crysania: (rubbing her eyes) Raistlin. We've been married for three months now; I think you can eschew the formalities.
Raistlin: Hmmph...so how did you sleep?
Crysania: Not too well...there's a huge lump in the blankets or the mattress that's bothering me.
Raistlin: (sarcastically) The gods forbid...is there anything ELSE you find displeasing with your new home?
Crysania: Well...Darling, I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm just so TIRED of being cloistered in this tower. It's dark, gloomy, your minions terrify the wits out of me and so forth. Besides, there's not really much for me to do around here.
Raistlin: (rolling his hourglass eyes) Well, why don't you go out on your own? I'm not keeping you prisoner...(starts to take a sip of his herbal tea)
Crysania: I was thinking...maybe we should go over to the Inn of the Last Home and pay Caramon and Tika a visit.
Raistlin: (sputtering violently)...Gack! You cough PURPOSELY waited until I was choke drinking, didn't you?
Crysania: What? No, I didn't.
Raistlin: Don't deny it, you 'wheeze' coquettish dissembler! I see the wheels working in your devious little clerical mind. You're still trying to get me back for refusing to marry you in the Temple of Paladine.
Crysania: Oh, honestly, Raistlin! I'm not that petty.
Raistlin: I would argue otherwise! You complained for days about how inflexible I was when I was perfectly willing to compromise! I suggested that a priest of Takhisis conduct the ceremony and you refused that.
Crysania: But I had a good reason. That goddess is corrupt and evil!
Raistlin: And then when we found a suitable neutral, middle ground, you still weren't happy.
Crysania: That's because it was a disaster that ended in homicide.
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FLASHBACK TO THREE MONTHS AGO, IN THE TEMPLE OF GILEAN
Crysania: Hail good priest and bright blessings be bestowed onto you!
Priest: Meh. What can I do for you?
Crysania: This gentleman and I, we wish to be married. Will…
Raistlin: (interrupting sulkily) Actually, she insisted on it.
Crysania: (ignoring him) ...Will you conduct the proper ceremonies for us so that we may be blessed underneath the gods?
Priest: (shrugs) I guess.
Crysania: (beaming joyously) Wonderful!
Priest: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now hold each other's hands.
Crysania: Certainly (reaches for her 'true love' affectionately)
Raistlin: Ugh, they're freezing! And I thought your demeanor was cold.
Crysania: Shhh! Proceed, good priest.
Priest: All right. 'Ahem' In the name of Gilean, I bless this union... There, you're married. Go home!
Crysania: (blinks) That's...IT?
Priest: Look, lady. Gilean is the god of NEU-TRA-LI-TY, he doesn't CARE whether a gold-skinned weirdo and a puritan cultist get hitched or not. Come to think of it, we're not quite sure he cares about anything beyond knowledge...
Crysania: (fuming) Weirdo? CULTIST! Why, you impertinent…
Raistlin: Steady, Revered Daughter, let's not have an aneurysm over this. (Turns to the other cleric) Well, Priest, if your god is so apathetic, then perhaps he won't mind my incinerating you...( a large flaming ball of light appears in his right hand) Heh heh heh 'cough'
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Crysania: I still can't believe you did that! You didn't have to kill the poor man, Raistlin.
Raistlin: I realize that, Revered Daughter.
Crysania: Then why did you do it?
Raistlin: (smiling mockingly) Because I wanted to remind you that I have no soft, sensitive side for you to try and bring out of me.
Crysania: (reaching underneath the covers of their bed) Wait a minute, I think I've found what I've been sleeping on...a stuffed rabbit!
Raistlin:...GIVE ME THAT!
